my problems are so minuscule and i'm so fortunate
but hey, i'm still complaining
everyone's sad and angry and ******* up for no reason
and finally,
no one gives a **** if you smoke cigarettes,
just don't pretend you're impressing anyone by doing it.
i've been saving cool cig holders on my online wishlists since i was 14
it's never been a new idea.
i'm sorry but i've been sad lately,
-one day maybe i'll get a therapist-
but for tonight i just whispered to myself,
"you have to stop."
because i've always wanted to want nothing
and i need to thicken my skin and stop caring.
it doesn't matter what happens
no one will remember you for as long as you want them to, anyway

i know
time passes
i keep sighing
still haven't learned how to sleep when i'm crying
and i am constantly over things
over-thinking
over-dramatic
over-stressed
but one day i'll be over all of it

no , i get it
i could pick up smoking
it's stupid, but it sure is romanticized
and with the nights i've been having lately,
what's a little more tar in my lungs going to hurt?

just ******* kick me in the shins,
wrench your fist into my rib cage,
don't quit pulling apart my lungs so I can't breathe.
life is a ******* game,
i'm being played

hello, it's later than i wanted it to be and i haven't tried to close my eyes yet
and i've been holding in **** for the past couple minutes,
i just think i think a little bit too much
about what you might be thinking about
i'm not sure i make sense
i'm not sure i like myself.
my wisdom teeth are really poking through my gums
i keep touching them with my tongue and it's later than i wanted-
i'd like to lay in grass under the sun holding your hand,
sorry for the cliche
sorry i'm a stereotype
i'm not sorry about any of this
i can't wait to hold your hand again
i can't wait for the sun
when i think about it,
when i really look around and appreciate..
how is anything ever boring

I NEVER WANTED TO BE A GIRL WHO COULD ONLY WRITE LOVE POEMS
i only write of loving you or hating me, it seems

even my insecurities take up a mere fraction of my mind
when i'm still so focused on your smile and bedroom and small wave, telling me to move closer

i don't have much room to dwell on my bad thoughts for too long

regardless, it's too late, i'm not taking care of myself,
and i'm really glad you still like me enough
to hug me tightly when i need it

but i have always been and will always be a girl who doesn't like to need very much