can't wait to sleep in your ***** pajama bottoms again
and wear the sweatshirt you left at my house even though the zipper is broken
i am constantly trying to surround myself with things that remind me of you
and i'm not sure what this means
but i don't want to think about the future anymore

don't look at anything i write
wait until it comes out of my mouth
because everything you've ever whispered in my ear
has been ringing and ringing
and i've never heard such a nice sound

i wish i could give that to you in return
i wish i would say things first
because god, i mean these words

when we were drunk,
i had sober thoughts of how handsome you were
(what kept me from saying it out loud?)
when we were sober,
i had drunk thoughts of how handsome you were
(what kept me from saying it out loud?)

I want to tell you so many things about yourself,
I want you to know that
I'm not sure when you began to mean so much to me,
but it feels like it's always been this way

my god the way you slur your words when drunk
"i wish i wasn't drunk," you said, and i know why you said it,
i know why, but i asked, "why?" and you shrugged.
i kept calling you cute (i couldn't help it)
and then you pulled me into the back room, saying "let's dance"

sometimes my eyes droop and my vision gets blurry,
my lungs lag and my flesh gets tingly,
sometimes i feel my heart beat in my throat
and every time i touch my skin it feels like it's peeling off
sometimes life feels like a dream
and i can't tell what is reality

i wonder where your hands will be in a year
i dream your fingers might still intertwine with mine

sometimes i explain things to people i shouldn't talk to,
-like how sometimes my mind lags
and my vision and breathing go with it
and it is difficult to think of reality-
and then i remember who i'm talking to
(remember it's not you)
and the look on their faces makes me laugh.
their stare makes me think maybe i am crazy,
i like talking to you because you are real
and you don't make me feel crazy,
even when i might sound crazy