this is the worst time
folded into something better
and suddenly i'm the world
shaking from within
warmth climbing to the surface
boiling my oceans
waving to the stars
i blink to feel alone
and look up to be reminded
i am not

brought to the ground by you
by you, who is soaring
who is crashing
into black ocean waves
blind and in pain
i am here to comfort you
this is unfamiliar
i want to thank you
but i need to help you,
first

you should know
not just anyone can look over my shoulder
and leap into the mind of a stranger
years away
inches closer
and while i admire your resolve
and your self-confidence
i'm asking you to step away and
leave me in peace because when
i open the eye on the back of my head
it's not you i want to see
i'm sorry

when doubt seizes fast
and waves slide out
allowing mountains to fall
and the earth to shake
felling buildings
breaking knees
there is no buffer to
prevent the slip into
a long, dark night

when the light rises red
like the sunrise
but not from the sky
but rather from the stone
flowing orange
liquid fire
a brief reminder to
always be moving
lest you fall prey to
false hope

doubtful of my worth
days pass and i say nothing
the people on the street
they hear nothing

we've silenced ourselves
so many years but
nothing's changed

too desperate to brand ourselves,
too frantic to hide from the fear
too quick to shroud ourselves in shame

you say "god loves you"
like a threat but you are
ignorant to the fact that he
made me this way

he loves me as i am
and pray he helps me
love you the same way

you send me good morning texts
when i'm three hours into my shift

i get flashes of inspiration
from tiny little bits of song
and i repeat them
three-seconds long at most
and i know this musician
got the same rush as i do now
this desire to create
to put words to the thoughts
swirling in my head
and i like to visualize it like
the storms of saturn
a thousand colors
a million winds
each impulse lasting half an instant
just long enough to taste
just brief enough to miss

in the clouds is a charity
it moves from town to town
sometimes it sleeps
when it wakes, it rains
and when it rains, it pours

look up and see a window to heaven
stare as long as the sky is clear
realize your days are numbered
make meaning from nothing
fear death