it's one of those nights
when everything hurts
everything hurts so **** much
and i know you aren't mine to miss
and i know you're slowly forgetting
my voice and
the way we talked
replacing me with a better memory than i could ever be
but all i want right now
all i need
is you
to just
be here with me

say
my name.

It is August, but the rain has got us snowed-in
and when you expect everyone
to be upset to get loud to cry cry cry
they do not. It is quiet.
The quiet hurts me (is my sort of madness).

The air outside
resembles the moon, or my skin.

In the winter,
the sidewalks look as if I have been beaten and
died coolly, flatly, quietly
on them. I am so white, I glow.
I am so sickly, I poison the grass.

But it is all very soft and silent,
I am like a pillow
too cold to rest your head on.

At night, I fall, devouring anything that I can
love —
when there is nothing,
I create the big rain, the arsenic rain
I stick to myself and everyone is hush, hush.

i:
Yellow jackets have their nests in the ground so they can
give their stingers to everyone
below three foot tall & never feel alone.

ii:
When I die
I want to be cremated to make room for another
five foot, four inch tall girl to live.

iii:
The woman who shall love you second
will not have the same size anything as me, not even my
heart.

iv:
when will there be more people alive
than people who have
died already

v:
You breathe 25,000 times a day
& only expect to
love once in your life.

At the first meeting of a boy and a girl, the slumbering embers had been awoken
With words and glances, dancing light burst forth
As time passed, sparks ignited and the flickering flame grew
It fed on youth and the new
Soon sorrows and grief were thrown to the heart
But nothing could quench their hunger and thirst
It was a forceful blaze and the crowds watched in awe at the waves and the haze
Passion consumed the two beings with growing intensity
The inferno cast out a howling roar, with the duo of hearts desperate for more
Each moment they were parted, the sensations were sorely missed
In their minds eye they were still embraced in a kiss
It was the marriage of peace and the striking power of the storm
They were stirred by restlessness as their minds were bent with longing
As this love of fire matured in its age, it feasted on the beauty surrounding
The letters of the great poets,
The words of the countless tomes,
The sound of stunning chords,
The eye alluring views of artistry,
And the words from the Giver of Life
Nothing escaped consumption
But soon, they were tired of the old ways
The beauty of the world was not enough to feed the furnace
They left the face of the earth in search of new waters, and left the air far behind
The love fire danced among celestial bodies, and spaces of dreams
And so it does evermore, awaiting new creation

I never wanted a man
but when I did,
his chest had to feel as soft as mine;

our *** was to be the kind
that made buds
blossom and petals fly.

Thought

he loves me
he loves me not
it doesn’t matter, he is still hot.

I could not be reminded
of a gun

when a man wanted to press me up
against a concrete wall,
I wanted
to think of bubblegum or

August rain;
soft, warm, moist things
keep-me-close sort of things.

I never wanted a man
until I met you

who had me the wettest of all things
mimicking hot tea
on the very small of your thigh

dropping leaves for

summer storms to pick up
and love us, love us not, love us.

Our arguments have begun to sound like musical notes
on a guitar that needs fresh strings,
there is nothing new about them. I cry about the same **** thing.
You look better now that childhood's run past you,
the round cheeks remain
but heartbreak means more than pouring sand in a girl's eye.

For every twenty things you would like to say,
there are a million that you already have. I listen to your
song crescendo and wane and the
rhythm of your heart seem to fixate, on itself, no longer on her,
I think it must be the most beautiful kind of hurt.

The worries did you well,
took their form in lyrics like a group of deep-settled wrinkles
aging the process, aging wine, can only get better
when you read the ugly things I write.
And although you look good
wearing the "about thirty-two months ago at five o'clock" shadow

I will not miss
the year you turned twenty-six.

She walks
Such a lithe/! feline step all of hips and she knows not
I am tempted so by the organic process of her
When she looks into my eyes
A Loadstone glow
A flicker - spark  

Now an inferno uncontained rages
Between us a cloud of electricity
Static
Waiting

SilentlyI dare glance
into those eyes
Let me
The polarization so instant at our first touch

They tell me she is not mine
She belongs to another
But her eyes

21,
21,
21,
we're playing a lucky game so
pick your sides.
21,
21,
21,
you're the lucky boy today so
enjoy the ride.
But tonic is so toxic
so tasteless
so bitter-trivial-faceless
when you have to swallow your pill
everyday at 8:30 PM,
sharp.
My liver ain't in the best of shape
my body ain't in the best of weights
my soul sure is dying fast
though nothing ever lasts.
21,
21,
21 more times--
just a number,
though nothing is just a number.
My blood is running poison,
a cut a running toxic tap.
My body is a chemical,
a bitter, vindictive compound.
21,
21,
21,
it all tastes so **** bitter,
all I can taste is bitter.