I'm standing on my own grave because I couldn't die
Waiting for the time to pass, I looked up
And there goes a drop
I always wonder where did I go wrong, but I know
It's not a mystery but a denial
While people are shouting, I already found the answer
A bit of them, plenty of me
Now I don't wonder but I pity, then I beg
For someone to hear and understand
But we don't want them, that's the truth
For they will give up or die, leave nothing but memories
Words in scriptures and smiles in photographs
They will be gone and we will stand on their graves
Thank them for loving us even though they barely did
And there goes ourselves and selfishness again
We don't bother to think what's wrong again
For this time, nothing is right and everything is wrong
I pity, then I beg
For myself to love myself for others to die without me

The year was 2022
Sidewalks are empty, skies are blue
'Perfect time to walk,' I said
But I never did nor I dared

The year was 2022
Man's in the corner, no one has a clue
'I have a family,' she said
But with a knife he held, he let her bled

The year was 2022
Divisions are visible, unity is through
'I will make it better,' he said
But he was laughing and joking and outside he fled

The year was 2022
There goes Ivan, there goes Sue
'Is it such a sin?' I asked
But no one answered, instead they buried it in the past

The year was 2022
Roof's old, it's time to renew
'I'm going to miss this,' I said
But boy, was I glad to leave behind the dead

The year was 2022
Time to leave the crowd, live with the few
'Perfect time to live,' I said
But the sidewalks are full and the skies are red

And as the 21st season will end,
The reality will finally begin

Dear Sir,
From where you are;
How much did we do for thy name?

Do not trust the liberals
Do not love the allies
Nor hate the oppositions;
'Twas not justice they make—
But abominations!

****** of words
Ballad of swords;
How're you still looking?
'Twas not justice they make—
Halt! And die

Sir, pardon the freedom
'Twas too much and too less
Chaste and filthy;
'Twas not justice they make—
Violent *******!

Hands are no longer useful
Looks like we have to stay at home today
And tonight, tomorrow, the nth age;
'Twas not ease they prosper—
Paranoid demotion!

Dear Sir,
From where you are;
Can you just forgive us?
'Twas not independence you gave—
But debasement!

It was a busy day, I can remember
She was across the street, dressed in purity
She was waving at me, about to run towards me
But the light was red, it never turned green

People around me are talking about me
I heard them cursing my name under their breath
I took away the angel for me
But the light was red, it never turned green

My family hates me for being ignorant
I never learned anything but the words of that woman across the street
She was about to learn everything for me
But the light was red, it never turned green

It was a funeral, I was not invited
How can I say sorry to them?
Nobody forgives a sinner
Because the light was red, it can never turn green

She loves me, and she will never leave me
She tells me life is never easy,
People will save no one but themselves (and that's ok)
So when the light was red, nobody made it green

Yesterday, we had conversation
We talked about your school,
Said that's your only life

Yesterday, we made out at karaoke bar
You sang The Velvet Underground,
I was stuck on The Fray

Yesterday, we wrote poem
It was to reimagine lost diary,
We only felt empty

Yesterday, I walked you toward terminal
We tried to embrace,
Driver shouted go or stay

Yesterday, you gave me book
It was about your life,
How I failed to save you

Yesterday, it was two years ago
It was the end,
I already lost you

Cashful rain on the apocalypse,
How can they be so generously obdurate?
Answer them, for they are poor
"Vote me for I gave you your money.
I will protect you only if you make me rich;
Ten for me, five for each.

Still not happy?
Here, buy yourselves shoes
I wanna see you kneel, clap and praise
To this rod I raise,
To this deluge, do converge
Yell and panic, your worth is my business."

Always, it is an open television, always
Fat men in fat suits watching their favorite shows

Staring at the ceiling,
Staring at my phone,
Why am I feeling this?
What's going on?
Heart's pounding hard,
I'm about to lose it now.
I thought this would be a good day,
But who's enjoying it now?
I was born for a minute,
Then the demons ***** me.
They tied me up on a tree,
Said for them, I am a real deal.
What a good day it is, indeed!
To be alive,
Is to be a feast for the devils.

Stop giving me 'happy birthday' cards
I'm barely happy it's my birthday
You'd disagree, but you won't listen how it's hard
To have a daily book of ******* everyday

Please! Stop saying how happy you are
I'm barely breathing yet you barely recognize
I wanna tell you I'm still crying over my dead scar
From that lost star you begged me to chase and revitalize

Tonight, I will peacefully die
You will be sad, but you will be glad
Thank you for giving me a life
And *******, and them, for making me vile

You are my Vita in my fantasy
Young and brave with still a husband—
Who craves to be with me

Look away, I mustn't stare at you
How you are dressed, I mustn't adore you
But, too late, you are here again—

In a paroxysm of the swaying goddesses—
We danced with them under the veils

A mister I as well and still have—
Oh, if we were only maidens forever

But, too late, I love him still
While I still forbid me to love thee

Let us not escape tonight—
Tomorrow let us not see each selves

Only pals we shall be—
On a century, fate will fin'lly say we're meant to be

You won't read this but...
Out here, I write about you
Under your defying eyes

A 'someone,' you are
Reading Edgar and Agatha
Escaping commons and moderns

Astute, they said you are?

But, who are you to talk—
If what you say, is only what you see?
Tedious, that harangue you made
Clever, you think you are with classics on your shelf?
'Half-wit' must've done your name justice instead

Beautiful painting, you are...
What can I say...?
You breathed...
We laughed...
I ceased...

Were we...
Troubled minds...
I thought those were...
Stars, figments of what...?
Are those dirts we're staring at...?

Dreaming again, aren't we...?
Elusive words, shifty sights...
Again, they happen joyfully...
Dead as we are, alive we'll be.

I will not kiss the feet of the banker
For no desperation can trigger the sadder
Mother, father, it inn me ye shall pamper
I will not kiss the feet of that right-hander

I might not make it but I did my best
But you see only, seek only, the visions of a high-test
Told me to be like them, the rest
I might not make it because you made me a jest

I will not kiss the feet of your master
But I will make it for in my ego I must invest

You are my Vita in my visuals
Young and brave with a husband—
Who wishes to be with me

Flip your hand, I mustn't take it
How you are made, I mustn't allow it
But, too late, you are here now—

In a cavalcade of blue devils—
You embosomed me in your palace

A mister I as well have—
Oh, if I were only a maiden now

Too late, I love him
Where as well I love thee too

Let us leave tonight—
Tomorrow we must go back

Only tonight we'll sleep—
On the morrow we'll be old ladies again

Everybody's mourning
Gloomy, cloudy, morning
How will we be this evening?
If nothing's, anymore, worth doing?

These children, what do they know?
No, no, we mustn't show
They still glow, no more will they follow
Old, wait 'til they grow, and them they might sorrow

Why didn't we see him?!
Loathing, agonizing, must I scream!
Up to his last grim, never we saw his final dim
Suppose, now and hereafter, we must wait for the beam
Until we hold, embrace, talk, this time, in my sorrowful dream

I did not cry when my father died
Can you forgive me if I tried?
Mother, she's weeping herself to death
Mourning, wailing, was she not enough to save a breath?

I loved you, Papa
All the days we had, how come we never had goodbyes?
All the mem'ries we had, how come I can only play them in my fuzzy cinema?
I loved you, and we always will, only if you once more look into her eyes

Four-headed cruelty will now look
Say, such a disgrace we from him took
Spit out the barbaric consequences now,
But on the day he left, don't slap us with the why and how

Alas, here, a tear will shed
But I will not cry even when his body isn't here to die
Mother, please forgive me with a cry
But in eternal, you will see me cloaking in red

'Children, what will become of you?' she said
With words I can't further comprehend
I turned around and played pretend
While she's soaked in tears with prayers in her head

I dressed in red, them in black
I felt numb, them are sad
I had no tears, them are weeping
I wished I did, them didn't

Until death, there are hatreds
No one seemed to care anymore
Is this really what mourning feels like?
Is this what painless melody sounds like?

There is a huge stone camping in my heart
There is a metal clanging in my head
Somehow, I think it is just a shadow
I'd like to think it is just a cloud

Can I see through, what is there to see?
Father, now you're gone, how far did we know and love each other freely?

It's been so long since I wrote a piece
When I thought I will forever write one masterpiece
What happened to my way of life, love, and truth?
Was it foolish to trust poetry as a friend?
The strengths I used to have,
The weaknesses I once manipulated,
The opportunities I used to grasp,
And the talents I once possessed—
All are gone.

God, You were there with her
Then I turned my back and left You,
So You took her away too.

Society, they did not hold me then
But temptations are too strong, attempts to withhold are useless
I succumbed to their arms and all of a sudden, she was already meaningless.

Poet, why did you love her?
You stumbled and fell down the abyss of sins,
Stained her purity then left her weeping back to life.

Creature of pretensions,
Die now without the truth and the life
Write now your death wish
And be captivated by your worldly possessions
Like you were once enthralled by her.

how do you seek fondness
when fondness is in front of you, nothing else

rainy month of july
coffee still lingers in your tongue
doyle's wide open on your table
cat's peaceful in your bed

why would you seek satisfaction
if satisfaction surrounds you, nothing else

coldest evening of the year
shivering by coffee
thawing by her sincerity

who else would be better than her
if she's a radiation of love, no one else

I shall stay home tonight
For head is louder than the sphere's noises
Throbbing with words... I can be less familiar
The moderns, it said, are swallowing us whole
But who are us? Who spoke?
Emily... whispered to me
Through this loneliness of poetry
I am not a modern, she said, we are ancient
But why I am her patient? To her, who told?
Axis of modernity... that's where she is
Through this, we made love to each
So I will settle, I said, to your handsome endowma
Questions, questions... no more conundra
Through and through, I must deify you

I was not supposed to feel an attachment
Nor a curiosity about the unlawful schemes
But the night was spent with intoxication of sins and shameless dreams
That I was afraid to see the lapse of your ephemeral esteems

Both a disgrace in morality—
We often take wicked comfort without hesitations,
Gratify lust without devotions,
And give love without obligations

If such will be read by h—
Capture now the glances of my tongue-tied rage
Do not speak without certainty
For I might say, I, too, like thee

Delightful will never be the term enough to describe how the advantages weighed more than disadvantages after I met you

But do not fret! This letter won't be a farewell
Presence of mine shan't be abandoned so long as you live by my senses.

You are the dearest among them women united,
Unparalleled even by whom the society mostly adored
Shall I continue further how your eyes in the morning revive the nights I spent with me alone?

By all means, let me lead the way--
Saundra, they must have made you a warrior
As no one can depart me from thee
You guided me so well, not even I can take me far from your goddess beauty
The soul you took can never be taken back,
If tried, the poet just might as well be blocked.

I love you, and will I ever cease to love you?
Death will welcome me with arms wide open when that happens
You love me, but will you ever cease to love me?
Life will welcome you with a cloudless sky when you always follow your heart
And do not mind me for I chose to worship you in the name of love.

To this end, still these words aren't enough to utter
To utter the voices of romance within me
Always, will I come back to that morning of July
Where you became firstly beautiful,
That until now I find it difficult
To conceal the awe whenever these eyes land on you

Do me, hence, a favor
When the dog howls on December
Do return to this letter
And on his ears, these words you whisper
Will make him feel the pain no longer

And as you cradle him to death,
Always remember---
Once a poet wrote your name on a paper,
Your soul will remain in him forever.

Thirty minutes
All it took for something meaningful
I didn't tell you it was beautiful
How you soothed me with words
That sounded and felt delusional

I could've ended nothing
Stayed with you until the break of evening
Because it was in that short moment,
I knew I owe my life everything

That perfect flash that could not be simply hated
Passed by my own eyes like a shooting star
That I had to wish for an existence of one David
Otherwise, let it collapse with a scar
And let the beaming chances be bitterly concluded