reason
/ˈrēzən/
noun

you are the reason i write
you are the reason i ache
the stab to my chest that
makes it bleed words every time
you see it break

i will write about you tonight. i will write using ink just as dark as the day you left. i will carry this pen using hands that has not forgotten how it felt to love. i will put these words to life using my heart that still beats for you. for you, only. and for you, always.

i looked into your eyes today
and i drowned in its sea
perhaps i realized that up to now
i still could not breathe
at the thought of your promise
that you would never leave me be
you looked into my eyes today
tell me, darling. did you see regret?
when i told you to forgive
or when i tried to make you forget
we pass by each other
as if this was the day we just met
"stay", you whispered -- when i never really left

there have been times when
i had to write about hope
but it ends up being about pain
i remember trying write about love
then ending up writing your name

*you are the reason i write
the reason behind everything i do
i could write about something different
but these words will always be for you

once upon a time
there was a boy who loved art
the kind of love that doesn't die
the kind that doesn't fall apart

he walks inside a museum
this is how his day will start
he will look at every painting
as if the colors have taken his heart

every time he sees its beauty
his eyes will shimmer bright
but every time he leaves
it will be his own starry night

the boy has his favorite painting
the boy has his favorite poem
there is nothing else in this world
that he would rather call home

just like museum artworks
he can only see, but not touch
the boy would dream of having a glimpse
of your brilliance
but having you would be too much

once upon a time
this little boy wrote a poem
helplessly hoping that strings of words
would keep his bleeding heart sewn

he could never come near
he can only linger in your light
he can never
this beautiful mixture of colors
that puts up rainbows
in his world of black and white

because the painting was a girl
a girl that never knew
so through a poem, he said
"the little boy was me
and that beautiful artwork
haa always been you"

sometimes i regret
that we fell apart
and it's been a while
but i ask myself
if we patched up things
and started again
do we even know each other anymore?
would we still laugh at
the same silly jokes
and fight over the same
ridiculous things?
and it's times like these
that i realize
i should probably move on and forget you.
if it's that easy
(god, i wish it was)
then i shouldn't be
getting worked up on
questions and quizzes
of ifs and maybes.
*if i did that, maybe it won't hurt as much.

the scent of you, i still look for
in places we used to go
breathe it in, like the pain
of the things
i was never supposed to know
the thought of you, still floods my heart
like an overflowing creek
i open letters from a few years back
and all of it
still means so much to me
you taught me to love
but never how to quit
i remembered you
and i still love you
but maybe that's why museums exist
maybe
to see one thing related to the person
and to suddenly remember
everything you used to do
but darling, how could i forget
when everything i see
is a reminder of you?

In this sea of faces,
yours is all I see.
In a room bursting with sunshine,
your eyes would be the one
to give light to me.
Are you happier with him
than you were with me?
Well, I want you to know
that wherever you are
I'm just hoping you're happy.
I hope he was your puzzle's
perfect missing piece.
I hope he's the perfect song
that always puts your mind at ease.
I hope he's the cup of coffee
or the fuzzy blanket that keeps you warm.
I hope he's the shelter to hide in
in the midst of a storm.
I wish I was the smile in your face,
the person that fills you with glee.
That person you gave yourself to,
I wish
I wish that was me.
I wish you well,
and my 'goodbyes', I bid.
I wish I've done all the things



that I never did.