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Emily Jan 2014
I'm just a ****** up
*******
I don't deserve you
And I don't deserve her
I deserve hate
From the both of you
It would be best
If y'all just
Cut me off
© Peyton 2014
Emily Jan 2014
She puts thoughts
Into my head
She says you're a liar
A cheater
She says you'll never
Accept me
For who I truly am
She calls me an idiot
For giving you
More chances
I don't believe her
When she says you don't
Love me
But after a while
I think of our
History
And start to wonder
If it's all true
And now
I am frightened
Because in the end
I'll most likely
Be left
By myself
© Peyton 2014
Emily Jan 2014
It's been however long
But the months
Never took my love away
It was always here
Waiting for you to come back
It's intense
When we talk
I feel the want
Deep in the pit of my stomach
I didn't think it was possible
For me to crave you more
But when you tell me
How I make you feel
I experience
A whole new sensation
Written a few days ago.

© Peyton 2014
Emily Jan 2014
Making mistakes
Lying
Doing the wrong thing
It's all added up
The pills
The drugs
The attempts at sleep
Nothing mends
My broken soul
Anxiety attacks
Like a lion
Does to its prey
I'm just a victim
Of my own mind
Ruining any chance
I have at survival
Much less happiness
My thoughts to end it all
Overwhelm my thinking process
I want to disappear
And never return
I don't want anybody
To know who I am
I don't even want to know
Myself
© Peyton 2014
Emily Jan 2014
I want to marry you
And see your pretty face
Every morning when I wake up
And go to sleep
I want to provide for you
Take care of you
Be your shoulder to cry on
When you weep
I want to do domestic things
Like make you meals
And take you out
I even want your babies
To raise and watch bloom
Into beauties
Just like you
I not only want to partake
In new and exciting adventures
But all those things too
Because I love you
Inside and out
I want my one life
My whole life
To be lived with you
Every experience
Fun and dull
I want you there
To kiss you
Whenever I please
Make love to you
Every day
In every way
You're an epic
Love of mine
I hope that you will be
For the rest of time
© Peyton 2014
Emily Jan 2014
When my feelings are this strong
I can't help but feel scared
Giving one person
So much power
Can leave my judgement
Impaired
It feels so good
To love this much
But what if one day
It all ends
The heartbreak
Would be enough
To change me for good
Bleeding forever
Like an open wound
© Peyton 2014
Emily Jan 2014
I miss you
When you're asleep
Alone in your bed
I wish you could rest
In my arms
I'd hold you so close
Right near my heart
Where you belong
With me
We can be
Eternally happy
You light up my life
Now let me light up yours
You're the fire
Ignited in my soul
We're just getting started
We have a lot more to go
On this adventure together
We'll always feel in love
No matter what the weather
© Peyton 2014
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