Emily

Emily Dec 2013

If you try to hurt me with your words
You fail
Because I've completely eliminated you
From my heart
From my mind
If you think I care about someone
Who doesn't care about me
Think again
You couldn't be more wrong
I have nothing left for you
Nothing
Except for regret
I regret you
But I got over that regret
The second I got rid of you
The second my eyes were opened
By someone who's actually worthy of my love

Emily Dec 2013

Who's The Liar?

I'm not the only lying *****
How many times did you tell me one thing
But you meant another
You're a manipulative witch
Using people for your own benefit
It's taken a while
But I've finally woken up
You're just a stupid phase
A nothing
I mean, how could I possibly love someone
I've never met or even really spoken to
How could I love someone
That has such a vindictive heart
At least I'm remorseful for my actions
But in you there's no ounce
Of empathy, sympathy, or even kindness
At least not any that I've seen
I'm the one who is genuine
I'm the one who cared
I'm the one who loved
So am I the liar?
Or are you?

Emily Dec 2013

The Guy

The guy that takes good care of me
Buys me medicine when I'm sick
Buys me food when I'm hungry
Takes me out on dates
Really knows how to love me

The guy that comforts me when I'm sad
Holds me close to his heart
Caresses my back with his strong hands
Plays with my hair to soothe my soul
Really knows how to understand

The guy that has fun with me daily
We smile and we laugh
We're like little children
The games make my heart sing
Really knows how to win

The guy that sees me for who I am
Looks past my flaws and imperfections
So kindly deals with my insecurities
And tells me I'm beautiful
Really knows ******* my worries

The guy that is my best friend
My one and only confidant
My soulmate since forever
He's my everything, my all
Really knows how to get her

The guy that I give my heart to
The guy that is worth all my time
The guy that always comes through
The guy that I'm fortunate to call mine

Poorly written in my opinion but I wanted to pay tribute to someone so important to me. I'm so blessed to have such a wonderful lover.

© Peyton 2013

Emily Dec 2013

Hell's Pit

The thought of never being your friend again makes me sick

The thought of how I miss you is one I cannot kick

The thought of never making you smile is *******

The thought of never claiming you as my own hits my heart like a brick

The thought of my life without you makes me want to die quick

The thought of never kissing you ***** the life right out of me like a bloodsucking tick

The thought of choosing someone else is awful because you're my first pick

The thought of getting you to love me is like trying to light a candle with no wick

The thought of never having you back feels like living in hell's pit

Pretty straight forward.

© Peyton 2013

Emily Nov 2013

Extreme

I'm the insecure type
But to an extreme
I don't believe anybody loves me
I always feel like there is some motive behind it
I've never fully accepted any lovers or friends
I constantly think I am annoying
A nuisance
But it's really my insecurities
That cause all the problems
I'm so insecure that I won't even open myself up to my family
My family
Family doesn't judge and it loves unconditionally
Well not in my mind
I won't go on certain trips with them
I won't visit certain family members due to embarrassment
Where does this embarrassment even come from?
This insecurity
To where it corners me and limits me to nothing
It comes from within me
It can't come from outside
Because everyone around me tells me
That I'm loved and accepted
But I will never believe them
I can't have a lover
I can't have a confidant
I can't have many friends
I'm always afraid
Constantly living in fear of being rejected
Not only am I insecure
But I'm overly loving
I love everyone because I sometimes wonder if they're like me
In which case, I want them to feel love
Real love
So I pour my heart out to everybody in my path
This is a deadly combination, though
Because I give everyone everything
But I accept nothing
It's like I pour my heart down a drain
And feel nothing but pain
Emptiness
I hope I'm not like this forever

Alone.

© Peyton 2013

Emily Nov 2013

Dear Brother

Dear Brother,
Today we partook in something
Mother wouldn't have been proud of
We tried to keep it a secret
But mothers know all
I wanted to wait for another time
I wanted to do it a different way
Be responsible
But I gave in to your rookie ways
Wanted to be the cool sister
And provide for you what my little bro wanted
Just to have a little fun
Now I'm in trouble
I take the blame for you
I won't let mom find out
But let this be a lesson for the both of us
Listen to your older, wiser sister
And the fun can still take place
But until then, I'll take this fall
And accept the consequences
Because I love you so
And don't want our mother
Looking at you the way she looks at me
Disappointed

Emily Nov 2013

How Good

I know how good I am
I know how good you're not