new train station up ahead:
hold on to your bags.
desperate times call for desperate measures
and my zip-locks have failed me.
lately,
i've been feeling down (too)
down, train track height, down;
but the train drives fast and i ain't got time to dwell on what should've been.
i'm moving
free will discarded like a greasy paper bag:
use it once, leave it behind
forget all about it, it's done.
we're speeding together
you & i
travelling to the lands of the unknown
where, perhaps, i'll get to know you.
lay your soul down for me
the blanket is soft, i swear.
i hope we don't crash,
i hope we don't burn.

we're speeding together,
you & i
time's a blur.
we hope we won't get hurt
getting off this train
and leaving behind the world.

i wanted to draw a drill
to represent how I was feeling;
but I managed to paint half a glass of milk
so i guess my mind had been drifting

two strangers
stared
at each other

the light
seemed to focus
on everyone else
but somehow
their cat eyes met each other
in the dark

one stranger
stared at
two heartbeats
and sighed

does it scare you
that they might leave
that you might go

and that you might not finish
your last wor

i keep falling
in and out of love
with the ****** character

we were by the chimney.
i placed my hand on your leg and
whispered how everything would be okay.

we were by the toilet.
i hugged you
i would make it bearable.

trust me

all i did was run
all i did was give
all i got was a shoulder
all i got was free

             of charge

i understand that you can't
but it still hurts


"thank you"
honestly, how much do two words cost

lightning stretchmarks
and like lightning, terrifyingly natural
symbols of strength draped exquisitely over my body, and
beauty, forgotten as a petty human convention.
the wonders of Her lightning streak my body
marvel in the bluish hues and thunderstorms.

she sighs;
she's understood.

we're not meant to be beautiful,
we were built to strike, to survive
you stupid, human, half-assed violet alibis.
we are smiters,
and you're doomed to go down,
bow to the power of the lightning bolts down my hips
bow to the power radiating off my well-earned crown.
Athena shall charge
and head on, we follow.
watch out for our thunderbolts,
watch out: stormy skies tomorrow.

i resent that all i've written about
has your name
and i promised i wouldn't give
this part of me away

can't pronounce "low" without knowing what writing without words feels like

shaky teacup balanced on her fingers
my mum's stunned expression facing east
my only weakness & my one temptation
could have broken our "forever holding peace".

the feeble smile i gave her;
terrified to hear the truth.
the sinking feeling that i'd failed her
an unnatural being, t'was proof.

like a stupid fever daydream i'd dreamt
and i swear she could see what was always present
in my head.
in that moment, she broke free
and together we laughed at thee
for believing the obnoxious implanted seed:
for believing my mother wouldn't accept me.

it's funny how i feared you giving up yourself completely to him and how empty you'd feel once he abandoned you and now you're pulling away and i can feel all the memories dying in my head. it's ironic how all my fears revolved around you but i'm the one feeling empty after another fruitless relationship seems to be ending and i'm left AGAIN with voices in my head saying "you shouldn't have", because i know i shouldn't have made exceptions to the one rule i swore would be mine.

but if he gets to apologize and if you get to forget everything and forgive, then i get another chance to say NEVER AGAIN.