Here I am, looking up causes for headaches
at 1 am
when I know it will always come back to you.
My hands found the bottom of the ocean
as I cleaned old movie tickets out of my car today.
I can see your honesty from here.
It took my composure on its way out the door.
I’m not bitter anymore.
I’m just tired.
And I’m tired of being so tired.
I’m sorry you didn’t stay.
I’m sorry that I apologize
for all the times you didn’t.
I keep forgetting these things
are not one-sided,
and so,
I’m sorry I gave you everything
for nothing in return.
You tasted like love,
and I was parched.
Still am.

I
    am
           unbearable.
You're
           un-
                 shutupable.
That's
           un-
                 believeable.
You're throwing
                             "You're
                                           un-
                                                  reliable".
­Sorry that it happened to you dear.
We shouldn't have gone this way
"We weren't together" you say.
Yeah, I'd comfort myself
                                           like this
                                                          from where you stay.
"Sorry for betrayal
                                 if that's what you wanna hear"
"Fine,
              we both know
                                         you'll pay"

Silence has opened it's mouth,
I unfold before it,
Strands come undone,
The story of a man gets swallowed,
The strength of my youth falls with the wind,
A veil takes the stars from me

My days ago
are piled
with excess.

My days ahead,
clouded
with letting
go.

This day today,
empty
as the bottle
laying next
to me.

And there's
no way
to grow
young
again.

I lose you
like I lose my mind-

effortlessly.