Addends, minuend, subtrahends... all Greek
to poor student long haired pencil necked freak.

****** (internal) revenue stream
plus plugged egress
equals flood of woe
torturous suffocation
of biosphere quite slow
particularly concerning one
Norwegian bachelor farmer from Oslo
amidst the bajillions of people,
one common Joe
(cur) just biden his time

pleading to acquire
much needed dough,
attorney General assistant Lynne Costello
sought out to help yours truly
(to no avail)
hoof hound himself cloven
and rent asunder courtesy
ofttimes mentioned cyber outlaws
preying upon (long in the tooth) fellow
suddenly his entire body electric
being deceived synonymous

with the plot of Iago
in my version starring
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
as none other than Othello
punch drunk as Judy
falling down laughing,
roistering, yammering hysterically
and rolling with a ****** Rockafellow,
whose role as a convincing fall guy
convincingly contradicted himself
as an above board underfellow.

Yours truly voluntarily recruited himself,
cuz he haint been rather astute
therefore welcomes
a swift kick in the derrière
courtesy squared off steel tipped boot
knocking the living daylights
predicated on lovely bonehead moment
linkedin to poppycock that did compute
as sense and sensibility
even suspicious to a deaf-mute
leary toward one extortionist

pièce de résistance, he did execute
and pulled wool over my eyes
analogous to snake charmer
playing magic (Johnson) flute
transfixing yours truly
a dunderhead lunkhead punked galoot
who in hindset could not add up
fishy (worm I going)
oh yeah... virtually nabbed
courtesy cyber bandits,
who gane nary a hoot

prying skewed logistics I impute
to wanna hang myself
courtesy suitable length of jute
tied with Gordian knute
gofundme page welcomes pledging loot
to help me (if you can)
with desired great expectation moot,
hence these lovely bones
when cremated will be transformed
into fine powder
more inert than a newt.

alternately titles: I got noose for you,
Yours truly doth garrotte tee
another itsy bitsy,
betsy wetsy easy breezy read.

oft times ('specially
these latter unsainted days and nights)
in white satin death
doth haunt me atheistic zeitgeist
which thoughts of my demise
crowds out purposeful thinking
in the twitching mind kampf
paradigm of this atheist
hence, he betook himself
to this MacBook Pro,
while swiss side dull ideations

for professional intercession, could not wait
asper affecting cathartic,
purgative, harmonic tête-à-tête
and providing a meaningful surrogate
to expunge morbid mental state
accessed Open Office
and let fingers
(of left hand) do talking heads
to an imaginary therapist
across this qwerty keyboard

allowing, enabling, and
at the quickest typing rate
striving to captcha dismal, gloomy,
and ill lust tree us
deplorable mood aye equate
with pitching into
a bottomless abyss where pate
fed ceaseless diet of NON GMO –
a last repast
the grim reaper did orchestrate

gluten free, an extra heavy dose
of monosodium glutamate,
which ingredient doth
BuzzFeed thine appetite
for total mortal exterminate
'thou no need n re:coe fermi to rush,
where angels fear
to tread, cuz but better Nate
than lever, the apothegm,
credo, ethos...Kate
(the caterer maintains

an open exit from life,
and cares only
that each soul doth feel elan,
joie de vivre, and psalm times
a leaping lemur chants, ecstatically finally
gustatory humming don't jubilate
for your final homecoming, or else
the mailer daemon lived
a devilish dervish life will instigate
de coup age d'etat, but such extreme

measure for measure heed doth hate
yet exceptions always made for a date
particularly when henchmen to die for
golden age opportunity
to ****** a generic guy a create
an underground soiree will cease,
when ashes master
of hell raising
unpleasant circumstances twill use as bait
let underground missionary be advocate.

can you save American democracy?

I highly hugely grant
Barack Hussein belated kudos
what with his wizardesses
in tow wrought wonders
to one nation analogous
while an under dog
sweeping in like...
It's a Bird... It's a Plane...
It's NOT Superman
but the Beagle Snoopy
imitating the Red Baron
saving the day.

Analogous to powerful twelve Olympians
in ancient Greek religion and mythology
(Zeus, Poseidon, Hera, Demeter, Aphrodite,
Athena, Artemis, Apollo, Ares, Hephaestus,
Hermes, and either Hestia and Dionysus)
you wield immense influence
among United States electorate,
(especially an exceptionally strong following,
where people of color be concerned)
which upcoming presidential election
November fifth MMXXIV
decrees intrepid politically savvy candidate.

No need to x (typically pronounced
as the voiceless consonant cluster /ks/
when it follows stressed vowel e.g. ox,
and the voiced consonant /ɡz/
when it precedes stressed vowel e.g. exam.

It is also pronounced /ɡz/
when it precedes a silent ⟨h⟩
and a stressed vowel
e.g. exhaust) spleen
with mine pun hushing
dull liver re:
how many citizens (most Democrats
and even a goodly amount of Republicans),
would vote for you in a heartbeat.

As the elegant forty fourth first lady
you became a role model for women
and an advocate for healthy families,
service members and their families,
higher education, and international
adolescent girls education.

Your megawattage aura, charisma, persona
continues to bring you rave reviews
and imbues avid supporters
as she positively affects
ringing endorsements of the following:
military families, working women
balance their careers and families
encourages national service,
promotes the arts and arts education,
and fosters healthy eating
and healthy living
for children and families
across the country.

Additionally, you earned
widespread acclaim and publicity
on the topic of healthy eating
by planting the first White House
vegetable garden since Eleanor Roosevelt
served as First Lady.

Totalitarianism will be trumpeted
courtesy the coiffed oaf
donned with FAKE orange hair,
whereby constitutional freedoms
beginning with disenfranchisement
will disallow, disable, and withhold
an increasing number
regarding people of color,
plus people hashtagged

as undocumented immigrants
forcibly returned to their homeland,
no matter purpose driven lives
includes people arriving
for work and study,
as well as for humanitarian purposes,
including unique events
such as those arriving
from Ukraine and Hong Kong.

Citizens like yours truly
will raise cane to no avail;
the prospect hard won freedoms
since the founding
of these United States of America
could be rescinded
at the stroke of a pen,
I already bewail
as a fait accompli
no surprise then

that even crafting poetry
dutifully doth decry abolition
of inalienable rights
(for life, liberty,
and the pursuit of happiness
strongmen of the law could curtail
suppressing dissent as forcibly decreed
"The devil is in the details"
will mount insurrection against holy grail
as enshrined in Declaration of Independence

turning into figurative mincemeat
the Constitution lighting a torch,
where “City On A Hill”
backbreaking slave labor
erected courtesy hearty and hale
dark skinned people
violently wrenched from homeland
mercilessly whipped and tortured
viz lynched while still alive a stake
thru flesh didst impale.

Politicians with a conscience
the exception rather than the rule,
and looking, peering, and
scanning back forty seven years
when thirty ninth occupant of White House
chose Walter Frederick "Fritz" Mondale
an American lawyer and politician
served as the 42nd vice president
of the United States from 1977 to 1981
under President Jimmy Carter,
I think virtue throve.

Hammering the final nail
in the figurative coffin of democracy
can be heard echoing
across the voluminously storied
complex edifice rent asunder
courtesy diabolical forces crumbled,
whereby all the king's men
and horses could not
resurrect best western civilization.

Dire prognostications
(terrestrial inhabitants blithely heeded)
with contemporary age
fortune tellers foretell day of (w)reckoning,

sans total mortal kombat annihilation
when human (and many) other innocent species
(stalwart cockroach adept to survive)
pitch headlong toward critical limit stage.

That eleventh hour fast upon mankind,
(as Earthlings speed headlong)
on a bee line irrevocable debacle
portending apocalyptic gloom

sprung, where weapons of mass destruction,
this from fusion and/or fusion of atom
(way smaller than an ant)
would severely impact global proliferation,

the vectors clearly delineated
sans urban jungle population boom
Plus billions of people occupy ground zero,
viz the only planet in solar system

how zing cheek to jowl **** Sapien life,
but Western Civilization may become
a footnote in cosmic history
(a justified exemption,

and rational acceptable excuse
for going doing homework),
unless immediate measures taken
to (yet rather ideally)
reverse nuclear destruction.

A multitude of flora and fauna would
no longer constitute biological niches
established via survival of the fittest
each animal and plant
(re: species and genus),
a catastrophe unto themselves

reducing genetic pool to zero, and subsequently
availing breeding ground for well sea sunned
microorganisms, perchance even a select
few critters immune
to radioactive oblate spheroid

dominating, flourishing,
occupying, et cetera #terra-firmae.
If screaming, slamming, strafing atomic, hydrogen,
neutron, bombs do not spell immediate demise
of the supposed brightest Primate put forerunners

handed figurative baton from Neanderthal
to modern man heating up human race,
the endangered qua extinct list,
the greenhouse effect from spewing
pollutants sky high,
with punctured Ozone layer as serious fallout

the latter revving into overdrive
squeezing Mother Earth Sunkist love
visiting via burgeoning population explosion
each respective year, those once dubbed

marginal lands will be exploited. Inclusive
fragile ecosystems (atolls coral expelled,
rain forests slashed and burned, wetlands
drained for another crowded house).

Once over population passed the tipping point
(possibly already surpassed),
a flagrant, ignorant, poisonous re-agent
will decree death-sentence, define desolation
deprive materialistic existence
no amenable longer fashionable, sustainable.

Abortion doth buzzfeed as controversial issue
among many simian members
(some well coiffed) of human zoo,
yet regulation regarding reproduction
the only surefire solution
to sustain quality existence
while livingsocial people occupy planet Earth.

Steely Dan sing queen (me)
outdid himself on sixtieth anniversary
after Grahame Wood
determined to meet
the evolving needs of the community
opened the first Wawa Food Market
in Folsom, PA, on April 16, 1964.

Today marked the sixth decade
since George Wood started
the Wawa dairy in 1902,
and it quickly became
a trusted name for fresh,
quality dairy.

As an unsung Patrons of said store,
I strove to achieve mitzvah
for an incapacitated wheelchair bound
resident here at Highland Manor Apartments.

The fickle finger (hut) of fate
unknowingly planned to liquidate
honest to dog sincere intentions
to deliver said drinkable goods
(you can bet your bottom dollar)
on his sterling promise
never foreseeing disastrous
misadventure out ranking
starry eyed bespectacled klutz
comprising the heart of this poem at any rate
(nitty gritty details omitted),
but essentially and summarily
spilled contents from three
twenty ounce cups of hotly perked coffee    
scalding himself in the process,
where epithets spewed
inadequately served at X-rate.

I asked him if he liked coffee
cuz today aforementioned vendor
acknowledged the brainchild
offering buzzfeeding caffeinated brew free
American chain of convenience stores
and gas stations originating
in the Philadelphia metropolitan area,
and now located along the East Coast
of the United States,
operating in Pennsylvania, New Jersey,
Delaware, Maryland, Virginia,
Washington, D.C., and Florida.

The remaining lines of this reasonable rhyme
garnered courtesy an endeavor
attempted quite some years ago
attempt bordering on the ridiculous to the sublime.

Even when iron not red hot,
I implement non customary quirks
regarding going for broke into survivor mode  
asia foreigner rather cold as ice
namely delinquent outsize credit card debt
mandates yours truly,
a cheesy survivor who rem: members
putting freeze on
Citizens Bank World MasterCard accounts,
whose helplessness to fork over

substantial dollar figure
analogous to one of three blind mice,
who ran after the farmer's wife
She cut off tails (OUCH!)
with a carving knife
must pay the price
methinks food in the slammer (ha)
will lack sugar and spice,
nevertheless macht schnell trice.

I exhaled deep sigh of relief
after speaking over the telephone,
whereby Arcadia Recovery Bureau
(i.e. collection agency)
based in Reading, Pennsylvania
explained yours truly owed $23.21
which considerably alleviated
immediate dire straits that figuratively
grabbed me by the nuts
hash tagged self scoundrel
a day late dollar short
dollars to donuts bonafide klutz

living ****** mint procreative
seminal squirt biological reproduction,
could never conceive to abort
despite countless occasions,
I blithely admit characteristics
linkedin with being a putz
going off rails as a one man train wreck
mine impossible mission to avoid
NOT running amok imagine
bull in a china shop
whereby the hypothetical proprietor
willing, ready able to tear out my guts.

Pigeon toed, I trip over me own little feet
size nine shoe small size for grown man
leaving utter disaster in his wake
synonymous when havoc strikes
chaos theory alive and well
ensues when I walk about
and dare take even one baby step.

Ever since adept with ability to crawl,
I ofttimes tumbled down the stairs,
but never did shed tears nor bawl
e'en when taking nosedive head first did fall
out the hatch of airplane

splattered, plastered, and matted
think suddenly feeling comfortably numb
joist another brick in wall
nevertheless acquiring stunt man role
paid big bucks

as **** sapien disguised as Sasquatch
(cause unkempt harried styled hair)
more times than I can remember
fell to Earth minus parachute,
which hoop fully explains

the incomprehensible drawl
earnestly and frankly harkening language
once extant within Gaul
which reverberated inside hall
of mountain (lionized) king.

Prior to any madcap misadventure
yours truly envisions his clumsiness
plays out within my third eye blind
hilarious scenario unfolds in slow motion
whereby accidental flick of wrist,
barely brushes up against
flimsy clothes rack

(the original motive begetting poem)
knee **** involuntary reaction,
kicking obstacle clear across Compton
generating comical feedback loop
impossible mission to stop
blockchain of fateful bitcoin events.

Living amidst (amongst) disarray
courtesy the missus, whose domestic habits
never merit housekeeping seal of approval
twenty four/seven pose
a hazard to mine existence.

umpteenth heat wave since onset of summer...
sizzles Delaware Valley today August 26th, 2022

Said geographical area composed of counties
located in Southeastern Pennsylvania,
South Jersey, Delaware, and
Eastern Shore of Maryland.

Sweltering temperatures
figuratively grip human zoo
bipedal hominids (yours truly,
an olive - garden variety simian)
seek much sought after shade
under whirled wide webbed yew
encompass vantage point to view
how flora and fauna cook née stew.

Weather records (temperature + heat index)
(one for the books) chart mercury
rising hot enough to melt tar,
which indicates global warming
quite evident I fear,
what with mean Fahrenheit degrees
from January – August 2022 (thus far)
noticeably above norm for this time of year
prognosticators foretell forecasts
per this third planet from the star,
which inhabitants upon Mother Earth
burden of responsibility must bear

billions of people wanton pollutants
ratchet up barometric millibar
dialing up greenhouse effect,
which serious scenario scientists fear
correlation from profligate offal ways
traced from freed genie in the jar,
no longer stretch of imagination
affects mankind did sear
since day of reckoning,
whence Prometheus set stage for war
pitting mankind against Gaia
urgent messages we fail to hear.

Dystopian forecast impossible mission to avoid
since doomsday thoughts pervade consciousness
after perusing newsworthy information
globe trotting correspondents riskily employed
imperiling their life and limb to acquire
truthful natural and/or human interest stories
occurring across all four corners
of oblate spheroid,
i.e. world wide web,
whereby Earth situated within nebulous void.

I try mine darndest to maintain optimistic aire
all the while gleaning apocalyptic intimations
courtesy human engineered phenomenon
all the more rhyme and reason to beware
**** sapiens on brink of armageddon,
especially when trustworthy cognoscere
painstakingly document their research
and without lacking hesitation declare

drastic paradigm shift away
from dependence on nuclear
energy and fossil fuels everywhere
else climate change could bitta bing
bitta bang hasten global warming,
where wicked watery wasteland
wreaks bleak soggy frontier
backed by popular demand
majority trumpets grandpoobear
for president, he who donned hair
actually he got bewigged courtesy fake
orange toupee, which got blown away
while he hoisted himself
with his own petard.

Imagine dragons if ye will - one immense
ferociously diametrically,
and climatological, cosmological,
geomorphological, meteorological phenomena
opposite that of Polar Vortex
(perhaps an apropos
nom de plume
would be Hades Furnace)
asphyxiating, clapping,
and encapsulating thee
entire oblate spheroid planet.

Judgement day could be similarly
blazing hot on the saddle, or cold
as a witch’s ***, which constant reminders
during Spartan, slated singe shearing,
stoic upbringing inured us Lutherans
to bite the figurative bullet
(which melted like caramel),
during those scorching, sea-sickening,
and sunstroke unbearable vaporizing winds.

No matter the temperature considerably cooler
holed deep within man cave
here within Lake Wobegon,
(especially with a box and desk fan
blowing pleasant air), nonetheless
I still lose out viz zit head by exertion
as a zero sum game.

within hinterlands of
Perkiomen Valley Pennsylvania
occurred January 6th promptly at noon.

****** whiteness blankets terrestrial realm
bajillion snowflakes tumble out of sky
atavistic fascination awakened
agog at ice crystals stinging each eye
while I strike open mouthed stance
relishing tasting frozen water molecules.

No matter yours truly witnessed
countless winter wonderlands
since completing lxiv orbitz round the sun,
the first major seasonal substantial accumulation
excites the little boy inside me.

Additionally, I feel truly humbled and enamored
when Mother Nature
singly and/or nsync with old man winter,
whether she (former)
looses propensity to wreak havoc
(think climatological, geological,
meteorological, et cetera phenomena)
or latter trumpets weather,
whereby landscape magically transformed
into blinding brilliance,
I tip hat to personification of winter
and fondly think back
remembering '96 storm of the century.

At that time January 1996
me and the missus timesharing
seven nights and six days holed up
along Shawnee on the Delaware
(a honeymoon gift courtesy my parents)
spending disproportionate amount of time
frolicking under warm blankets
ardently, fervently, naturally...
both of us experiencing
devilish, feverish, impish,
loutish (more so me)... concupiscence
striving to beget offspring, yet unsuccessful
conceiving Blizzard Baby.

Now far beyond prime procreative age,
(though I wistfully envisage
begetting another progeny -
simultaneously stretching credulity
to breaking point)
all things considered
exhaustion would peter out
after capitulation of divining rod
necessitating lifetime to recoup energy.

Bound within figurative four walls
of Schwenksville, Pennsylvania domicile
courtesy appreciable snowfall,
I direct energy crafting poem.

Yours truly will actually
refrain comestibles despite feeling hungry -
lest metabolism to digest food
decreases potential alertness,
and full belly finds me
ready able and willing
to doze immediately into deep slumber.

Hungry stomach in tandem
with eventful weather
sends surge of giddiness
coursing thru body electric
crackling, popping, and snapping
(while O Captain! My Captain!)
came to witty man (me) suddenly
enervating with poignant pregnant expectancy
papa pondering his empty nest syndrome
analogously attempting to offset void

coaxing reasonable rhyme into existence
unsure how literary endeavor
(mine) will thrive
amidst well suited
panoply of prolific writers,
whose unseen fingers
hop lightly and gracefully
across qwerty computer keyboard
akin to heavy armed soldiers
with fearlessness and deliberation
heading off to war to acquire poetic license.

Meanwhile chafed knuckles
of one garden variety primate
previously scraping knuckles along tundra
in mock imitation of forebears
(methinks I espy frozen Mastodon)
before said twenty first century caveman
learned to stand *****
endeavors to strike letter combinations
eliciting, facilitating, and generating
enticing curb appeal.

Not a human creature stirred, nor seen
throughout Highland Manor,
property carpeted in lush green
gently hilly terrain,
(a deathlike stillness descended un keen
quiet and quite cool April 26th,
deux thousand twenty one).

Vicious rumors circulate wrenching
hammering, and drilling psyche
where mailer demons invade,
that immediate hell fire enfilade
natural hair color made
gray follicular shocks amply pervade
instantaneously turning
Janus faced with Machiavellian

mean streak inlaid
(how word some would say)
"stern", any previous
housewarming aura
experiencing welcome spiel,
nor iota of politesse present,
but Trumpeting her entourage,
asper self important capering escapade

taskmaster known to abrade
even the most stalwart macho,
gung-**, brave appear afraid,
thus oft time tis most
advantageous and optimal
prospective mutineers betrayed
Princess Jan Ger
harridan de jure ushering tirade

akin to a petit grand mal one
woman banshee masquerade
hoop puts on be preyed
upon switching pretentious airs
dead ringer give
away (immediately
points gnarled finger
sentenced to clinker visage),

non verbal charade
hence unstoppable mounting
anticipatory anxiety manifests
as disabling, impending,
oppressing fate
cannot be delayed
if insubordinate tenants
try with futility to evade

officials with truncheons flayed
doth rarely give surcease
renters passing grade
she, the consummate
de facto grande heiress
of Gr*e & Que
inherited plum deal,
where lifetime employment,

and generously paid
analogous as born
(that way) portrayed
maintaining poker face
into royalty made,
now as single mother
to biracial heir
purportedly inhabits castle

abode with parents,
thus no child
care costs paid
expectant heavy foot
falls getting louder,
(oh...no that jist
my heart pounding
whence approaching raid

so please inform this jade
did troubadour if privy to let
(me and the missus) aid
i.e. a safe and sound
place to call home
with this hole in the poetry wall,
I would immediately
make thee a fair trade

in lieu of living, where
mercilessness doth parade
expenses property upkeep,
teaching (two
door ring) English,
or even employed
as a mister minute maid.

Yours truly constantly repairing
psyche delicate ruptures
afflicting me since mine birth.

Which late afternoon/ early evening
today adventuristic, edenic, and idyllic
April 13th, 2021
pitch perfect weather
serves as temporary tonic
to balm away blues.

Like a tumbleweed
aimlessly blowing in the wind
across infinitely wobegon open wide
prairie home companion land
(which wasteland famously
epitomized by T.S. Eliot),
a barren vista ravages
metaphorical landscape
of one measly mortal malcontent male
bumping and scraping

along accursed habiliment
barely avoiding and
dodging diabolical demons
mercilessly and unrelentingly ready
to ****** this somewhat sanguine Simian
finds himself amidst pitfalls
of tortured twisted existence
racked with pinions describe bing
demonic dragon filled dungeon

damp, dark, demented domains –
a veritable no man’s land
impossible to escape no matter how fast
I, a beastie boy
foo fighter flees
from fearful, fearsome phantasmagoric forms
figments imagination seemingly real
tangible as bone and flesh
haunts sacred crowded house of slumber
transmogrifies me into loathsome madman

ranting raving senseless
gibberish and sic gobbledygook
perceived as metaphysically
n philosophically insane
as soundgarden syllabification
from one wily World Wide Web wayfarer,
which virtual vagabond venerates vowels
and possesses means and tees to till verse
akin to sorceress,

who waves a magic wand
rendering subject spellbound
(housing bajillion words)
to produce supreme sentences
weaves tantalizing terrific
tweed topographic tundra’s
that this admirer of her artful
and colorful poetic endeavors
prompts me to accompany my mindscape
as a thought-provoking troubadour

amidst the information
super byways and highways
along winding labyrinths of critical thinking
or simply stepping o'er rolling stones
of silly rhymes without wing less reason
all the while giving subtle egress
into that chamber of secrets
long kept shut tight to maintain
that sure footed stance of solitude

whose only entities happened
to constitute trappings
of literary lugubriousness
those tombs of largesse identified
as great works and masterpieces of literature
yet careful to avoid complete intimacy
lest that cherished solitude shattered
and a heart rent asunder
twin tower ring inferno
imperils of loss that provide

an understandable cautionary tale
to the author of this rambling missive
a most profoundly perceptive
acute Ape man
touched to the quick
with a bit of angel dust
aware that this agonized
and angst riddled arboreal beast
contents himself within
confines of cyberspace!

visually delicious as  germane strudels
the following cooked years ago
courtesy me noggin awash with noodles.

Yours truly crafted remaining poem
around 27th July 2018
idea arose within me cerebral dome.

...As poetic theme came to mind
     in a Serge without a waiver
thus, I took a virtual Page
     from Google LLC to slaver
with little effort
     in an acceptable
     rhyming rant and raver
about said American

     multinational technology company
     that rode dot com bubble,
     where other startups did quaver
specializing in Internet-
     related services and products

     rolled out amidst
     much fanfare palaver
though odd, how such an obvious
     idea hit me like figurative brick
over thine noggin

     upon instantaneously espying
     Lyudmila Vladimirovna Rudenko
     Soviet chess player, and second
     women's world chess champion,
     from 1950 until 1953
     when bitta bing bitta
     chitty chitty bang bang
     that eureka momenta did click

mental wheels and cogs
     as if...an oil derrick
hit a mother lode, thence subsequently
     inducing automatic flick
     as latest feted persona grata
     gets done up in bold face and/or Italic,
nonetheless a commendable
     spontaneous fantastic burst

     of inspirational magic
commensurate with mine
     modest prolific quixotic
of course, I WON'T applaud
     idea de jure as terrific
and puzzle over, how such "a ha"
brilliant idea did not occur to this -

     Ok la home ma sooner
     ushering world wide
    webbed ******* "FAKE"brouhaha
sooner to the mind
     of this humble ****
Louie, who admittedly
     feels tidy bowl flush with
     goo goo Lady gaga

(tony the TIGER FEELING great,
     a mild euphoria if gifted
     as lottery winner)
over the top smugness -
     unaware of jeering ha ha ha
within dark internet arena,
     where the much maligned,
     loathed, and feared Jaw

bar wall key (jabberwocky)
     dwells ready to pounce
     outsize egos hated
     like an incorrigible outlaw
hmm...perhaps cognizant

     ex post facto, I set
     a deadly faux paw
forever remembered as
     ornery oaf forced to eat raw
bits (hexadecimal at that!)
****** in via last turkey in straw
     that broke the camel's back.

Fred Trump taught his sole son Donald
how to steal the leading way into more ***,
though no hint given, nor prediction forecast
in his growing up years, that would foretell,
thru base anaphylactic cronyism, egotistical
gall insidious kleptomania call, malodorous

Machiavellian offal obnoxious quintessential
skullduggery, unfair wicked yik yak zeal
to wield selfishness, a mean mogul with brass,
who would unstintingly live up to his surname,
and trump every law in the books of jurisprudence
and crass bend avast set of constitutional laws
to feed his ferocious fealty to the all mighty dollar

flaunting, fleecing, and flipping  the welfare
of those (he deemed must serve him
his insatiable hunger) to connive, dictate,
and expedite his hell bent assiduity,
an empire fit for a King, who felt no aversion
to mollycoddle, peddle, and wheedle

any zealous contractual obligation
(immediately abrogated), and concoct fabrications
vis a vis, a visa versa MasterCard his
American Express shun re: the art of the raw
FitBit (if necessary browbeating, depriving,
forfeiting meting out legally obligated pay

whenever an inconvenient truth awoke
in his noggin reneging fiduciary promises
to the risk-taking, moon shining, toiling citizens
ala Indian giving per many an unfair deal
exuding crass with especial treatment
to withhold wages for his (held in check)

Polish laborers, who built his city on rock and rolling
stock – so a Starship emblazoned with
outsize ego of an exploiter with no pay
to his backbreaking Polish construction
motley crue nor even mucho grassy us
for erecting his empire now ranked in
billions of dollars unfairly pointing a finger

to berate, dictate and finagle foreigners
(illegal immigrants, he would now boot
out of this country) to carry out drudgery
with hungry stomachs growling at slave wages,
lamentably plodding since any other employer
might question their vlsa status, hence anger
boils within this generic human enraged

his wealth squeezed from every last drop
of said craftsman, now if still alive old and
broken men crushed by the mighty
self proclaimed dictator of the proletariat,
whose hollow being blind sides those
he stares down, yet beware all that glitters ain't gold!

Ah... nothing more enjoyable than acidic gastric fluid (bile) flowing backward into esophagus, resulting in heartburn, disrupting pleasant dreams. Unsure how successful literary endeavor crafting reasonably rhyming poem (actually the following written a couple years ago with only slight modification) regarding aforementioned topic yielding moderately satisfactory (née middling) result.

While deeply asleep
scant minutes before high noon siesta
burning sensation within deep
tracts of throat did creep,
yours truly immediately awoke
with a start, at strong violent

urge to upheap
visualizing setting Guiness Book
of world records leap
ping at lightspeed into bathroom,
nevertheless, I made little
or no bowed peep,
but sat bolt upright stock still
tear ducts activated eyes
as if ready to weep.

Sadness less pervasive than fright
since reverse peristalsis uncommon
within body electric regarding plight,
which analogous volcanic eruption
albeit bubbling magmatic flow slight

near regurgitation found yours truly
on par with fire breathing dragon ar
goo ably momentarily nonplussed -
while dry cough minus gushing lava
gratefully only smoldered before sim

ring after singeing
upper gastrointestinal lining did
allow, enable, and provide mouth
fulls of distilled water satiate sudden
unquenchable thirst relieved result
ant unpleasant aftertaste (no pun

intended), yet distilling humor helps
me weather, manage, cope... with
unexpected physiological fee nom
mina - shot straight up within digest
heave tract, and  I did lament this rick

kitty packet of muscle and bone aft
times susceptible to disheartening
woebegone news afflicting this non
Norwegian bachelor farmer, whom
if the missus cooking triggered bout

unleashing bit torrent of unsavory
plate tectonics, perhaps indicative
of continental drift shrunk down to
miniature, (think nanobot size)
where fault in thee stars
must be held in contempt of court.

No reason for inclusion of above verse,
(constituting six lines), I just wanted
to incorporate gibberish phrases, tip peer
me got some legal lear'n, when truth
Philly admits he seems to know less,
the more he learns, which prompts me to

posit emphatically that ignorance iz
equivalent to bliss, thus presenting
quandary how kin this pronouncedly
reasonably intelligent garden variety
**** sapiens unfetter himself with

cumulative knowledge without reek
horse (neigh) to invasive surgery such as...
prefrontal lobotomy, or te deum down -
smarts some unknown cyber surfer(s)
could easily misconstrue as vainness,
smugness, quintessential pomposity?

Synonymous with light hypnotic mode
inhaling and exhaling diffusing anger
lest mine noggin would explode
rhythmic breaths flowed
sustained me red nose (think Rudolph) glowed.

Holistic approach to derive peace of mind
necessitating absolute zero noise
(the slightest distraction
offsets delicate transcendent state)
nevertheless effortless breathing
(whereby mantra incorporated)
buoys body, mind and spirit triage.

Trail of tears left in my wake
tortured psyche I cannot take
woebegone roiling anguish doth quake
one christened Matthew Scott Harris
quite popular namesake
yours truly
zapped, wretched and tattered
gruesome caricature keepsake.

Me beast of burden exhausted,
thus I take tired *** abed
cuz cheeses crust,
this brother spiritually bred
though NON GMO gluten free
das capital one human got cred
linkedin and locked with dread.

Retrospective of mein kampf on display
no time for sergeants, nor hip hip hooray
mine burdened psyche clamors, hankers, pines...
willingly bequeaths fractured father
to posterity, I just wanna lay
overburdened spirit desperately plunges
into terrestrial realm reaching passageway
where pained existence bids adieu
flourishing grateful dead today.

Book of Wisdom in the Bible,
chapter 2, verse 8
advises gather ye rosebuds while ye may
impossible mission to squelch
testosterone laden hormonal secretion
nsync with biological call of the wild
helped beget deux offspring.

Series of unfortunate events
(only known to Lemony Snicket)
finds eldest grown daughter bereft of beau
who abandoned her
he went back home
to Puerto Rico.

Emotional pain wracking said progeny
(wind knocked out her sails)
vicariously experienced courtesy
saddened sensitive simian
soporific sullen papa, he whose
biological flesh, bone and blood
unforgivably, unfittingly, unfairly subjected
to unnecessary undeserved punishing lament.

Me and the missus wrought smart "star student,"
who matriculated and graduated storied
ivy league college
University of Pennsylvania alumni
suddenly strewn helter skelter
cuz ex boyfriend earned handsome income
to pay pricy apartment
housed within Oakland, California.

Dada poor bucks here
unable to allay financial hardship
saddling lovely young lady
birthed approximately twenty four years ago
both of us parents indigent
nonetheless livingsocial hand to mouth
along ritzy, snooty and tony MainLine
Lower Merion top notch school district.

Bellicose tirades spill forth
out the figurative mouth of our bubala,
she livid ranting with rage
shouldering an onerous task,
whose dark shadows cast grotesqueries
creep along the edge of night
within outer limits of twilight zone.

without yours truly experiencing urge to defecate

Neither bloating nor constipation
arose, but one nondescript anguished
logophile anticipated intestinal blockage,
hence prophesying worse case scenario

I (predicated in direction for an adult)
ingested three Dulcolax tablets
and subsequently this joker
found himself riddled
with debilitating diarrhea dilemma
that afflicted me hours on end
today April 11th, 2022.

Severe **** travails
immediately brought forth
****** recollections regarding
my offal bout with shigella
circa approximately July fourth holiday
nineteen hundred and eighty seven
which ranked as worst pain in the ****.

Two women (Ziona and Susan –
surnames unknown),
plus your truly, which trio
befriended each other
from Thursday night contra dance.

Aforementioned women
minimally identified
via first name basis
(since their sir nom de plume
unknown at this juncture),
and yours truly linkedin,
via above said social venue.

This piece of information mentioned
since that innocuous site
(Summit Presbyterian Church
at Green and Westview Streets
within Mount Airy, Pennsylvania)
essentially served as
figurative starting point
per following true anecdote.

Though about thirty five years ago,
my memory easily jogged,
asper unforeseen brush with death.

Innocence and naïveté twin factors,
tangentially contributed to agonizing ordeal.

Ask me what I ate for breakfast
this morning, and ye will receive
a blank stare!

Turn back the hands of time,
well nigh eighty percent
since existence sans mein kampf.

Every summer informal conclave
regarding congregation of hippies
(most of whom found me
looking conservative – fully attired)
decide upon a locale communicated
thru the grapevine.

The Rainbow Family Gathering
(vast majority opting to shuck clothes)
that summer held in Cheoah National Forest
just outside Robbinsville
western North Carolina,
and the farthest south
clandestine group congregated.

Among the estimated 12, 700 attendees
(one of whom included yours truly),
more than fifty percent
of the sprawling masses
contracted the near fatal
outbreak of shigellosis.

Sanitation in the expansive campsite
ranked as poor to non-existent.

This absence of proper hygiene
provided opportunities
thru contaminated food,
water and person
to person contact.

Widespread transmission
of the very opportunistic disease
caused by Shigella sonnei,
resistant to ampicillin,
tetracycline, and trimethoprim
sulfamethoxazole;
the rapacious organism
categorized as colicin type 9,
and contained a 90-kilobase plasmid,
not found in non-contagious related strains.

Misery loves company,
and this epidemic plagued
the infected with unrelenting diarrhea
and general lower
gastrointestinal debilitation.

Unsure how this then
late twenty something singular male
managed to weather
the microbial onslaught,
which rendered me prone
to a doubled over spate
of being lobbed and hamstrung
hammering the lower gastrointestinal tract,
and incessant severe loss of nutriment
vis a vis thru ****** a steady state
quintessentially unable to nourish
an already slim body.

Upon relieving chronic purging
from the sphincter muscle,
the sensation to expel
countless times thereafter
explained (not recommended diet)
the rapid loss of weight.

Whence returning home
at that time 724 Level Road,
Collegeville, Pennsylvania, 19426,
this ghostly appearance of mine
immediately alarmed, discerned,
and gauged family members
to schedule me for
immediate medical intervention.

After being examined,
(what little flesh remained
of what resembled
a Holocaust Concentration camp victim),
the physician could offer
no pharmacological remedy.

As the days of my life passed
under bedside and medical watch
of mother, who worked
as a licensed practical nurse,
yet could do little or nothing
to halt her own demise courtesy
metastatic carcinoma viz
ovarian/uterine cancer
approximately seventeen years ago
early May 2020.

Psyche wracked with agony
impossible mission to extricate lovely bones
they wanna remain permanently abed.

I chiefly function to amass knowledge
courtesy assiduously, habitually,
and judiciously reading
an eclectic assortment of written material.

Yours truly woke
with ambition, disposition,
inclination, and predilection
to glean from an assortment
of books esoteric learning
since... birth, but particularly
when experiencing emerging adulthood
about two score years ago.

Feeble attempt crafting poetry
whereat gobbledygook doth trot -
oven chilly cooked confusion eliciting
faint thanks a lot
unbeknownst this tasteless,
senseless, rhymeless... lettered
Rorschach test tease I jot
interpretation, viz hitting
analogously like amorphous melted ingot
watch yourself...

d's lines iz still smok'n HOT,
now I puzzle regarding how
to extricate mess elf,
cuz aye got myself
into try'n to strut and trumpet
hightailing (courtesy Google)
searching information superhighways
one can cyber surf to Hong Kong,
(a coastal city and major port
in Southern China,

bordering Guangdong Province
through the city of Shenzhen
to the north and the South China Sea
to the east, south, and west)
an entrepôt, (which goods brought
for import and export,
and for collection and distribution)
yea, that autonomous enclave
the region inhabited since
the Old Stone Age,

later becoming part
of the Chinese Empire
with loose incorporation
into the Qin dynasty
initially starting out
as a farming fishing village
and salt production site,
it became an important free port
governed by Chief Executive,
who serves as premier of the Region

and head of government
of Hong Kong
beholden to The Basic Law
which designates a system of governance
led by a Chief Executive
and an Executive Council,
under principles of separation of powers,
with a two-tiered system
of semi-representative government
and an independent judiciary.

Anyway... when zombie like,
and hyper aware
about mein kampf,
and lxv roaming years
exhibiting conscious state
(although that might be debatable),
I try to dead reckon eyes
purposefulness astride oblate spheroid
nsync with other gals and guys
either one, t'other or all
mask cue lated in disguise

impossible mission to triangulate
Euclid say logic defies
to comprehend gibberish,
no matter how much you scrutinize
his highness, qua shape
shifting imperfect square stumps
any tree mend us great mind to analyze
me skewering, marinating, gunning... decries
abiding any logical positivism
queries best addressed to Lord of the Flies
since nary handy dandy blues clues,

I opted out thus...
******* provided to synthesize
random words helter skelter
strewn to symbolize
absent any rhyme or reason
courtesy handy matted figurative
trapezoid doth employ
no paradigm to exercise
leaving comprehension after mine demise
so go ahead chastise
cuz I already know,
never will said poetry win apprize.

Initially, an attempt
sought regarding Das scribe,
yours truly donning
checkerboarded rawhide
collared, cuffed oversize raiment, pride
and prejudice obscured
courtesy hand-me-downs
couture also decking out
alley oop trapeze artist bride
of Frankenstein grooming in attendance
with her bonafide
circus motley crew, a veritable
monster mish mashup
happenstance didst decide
unlike traditional feted newlyweds
swingers airborne did only abide.

The law of gravity aerial
pas de deux bodies airborne
aloft pledging their respective troths sworn
fleeting suspended animation while shorn
infinitesimally of Earth's pull
only expert can playfully scorn
accomplishment courtesy no greenhorne
neophytes in utero umbilical cord,
taking root as metaphorical acorn,
thus unbridled and groomed skill inborn
burst out the womb like heated popcorn
snapped up since birth well worn
genes Ringling Brothers and
Barnum & Bailey circus practiced morn
till night stunts became second nature
encore performance
no matter bodies outworn.

Curtain Call now doth close
unrehearsed poetic gambit,
cuz yours truly tuckered out I suppose
ready to take his doze
zee dough into dreamland, expose
zing oft times confused
with dark shadows of outer limits
of twilight zone,
where me lovely bones froze
where sudden night mare arose
gripping courtesy rigor mortis head to toes
daunting wordsmith champion
manifestation of daily woes.

Suddenly me clutched
by melancholic despair
somnambulantly where
countless tomb morrows *****
scarcely undifferentiated
from yesterday's care
wracking psyche with wrath plus fear
at accursed purposelessness near
faux sing myself regarding pas
city to emulate good cheer
whereat time and tide
wait for no man/woman.

Foremost gratitude heavenly indebted,
jumbling kindling, linkedin mourning
numbness overlaid, pervaded, quashed,
routed thoroughly undermined vibrant
warbling, when xing yesterday's youth

zigzagging, accompanying blitzkrieg
cleaving deafeningly exploding,
formative grim homelife, indelibly
jabbing kid, (little me) nonstop,
overwhelming progeny, quintessentially

robbing, stunting, tormenting
unrelentingly vitality wrenching,
why xyst, zapping assiduousness,
begetting, crushing, destroying essential
fortitude, generating grievousness,

hellacious intractable joylessness,
kneading loneliness, murdering nascent
opportunistic potential, quiet, reserved,
timid, untested voiceless x years,
zilch accomplishments, boyhood

cheated, dieted, extremely famished,
gifted hirsute heir, ill, jettisoned
kippered lunkhead mealy mouthed,
nerdy, outlier psychologically quartered,
repressed self, tamped universal vitality,

withheld Xmas yearnings, zapped
animalistic basic cravings, denied
endeavoring fulfillment, gouged hole
inside, jawboned, kept lid mentally,
nixed opportunities, pronouncedly

quarantined, rabidly snatched tasting
ultimate vibrant x2c, yanked zipline,
aborting bequeathed capacity depriving
eats, forever ghosting hated individual,
jackknifing, kickstarting livingsocial

mortgaged, never ordained physical
quests, ruined self, thoughtfulness
vanquished, worthiness Xrayed,
yabadabadoo zone agitated
beyond crafting development,

executed firstrate glorious human,
impounded jailed kindred love,
manifested nebbish, obliged pleasing
quirky ridiculous travesty, unleashed

vapid wretchedness, xyz, attempted
bizarre concoction, decoding
essentially fruitless, go head issue
joker kick.

Today May 12th, 2021
at Royersford (Pennsylvania) LIDL,
when spouse stepped into checkout line
(minus her horse drawn grocery cart -
pushed courtesy yours truly).

While passively standing stock still
I (think Stonewall Jackson)
let scenario unfold before
mine myopic eyes,
whereby acquiescing
nonverbally attempting to scooch
closer to conveyor belt
subsequently attempting
to maneuver shopping cart
in front of another patron (an older man)
with small number of items in his cart,
who became irate at me.

He appeared angered
at his thwarted (senior) priority,
especially when mine wife
gave him few choice words.

All that learning regarding
learning conflict resolution
(years gone by)
taught by the late therapist Jean Dole
ineluctably escaped me.

I smart with disappointment
not offering aforementioned
aggravated fellow shopper
right of way
proceeding ahead of us
(initiating at least one daily
random act of kindness).

Figurative astringent aftertaste
left in mouth cuz laudable
good samaritan deed chased
away, thus one generic bloke
felt he disgraced
his credo and ethos that laced
behaviorist paradigm
shouldering virtuous lofty aspirations
as upholding saintiless gone to waste.

Nevertheless foo fighting beastie boy
attains exhibiting motto
viz - doing right by doing good.

Since birth and every
subsequent growing up year
until earth around sun orbitz equalled
lxii plus some months gradual aging

upon this body electric didst wear
major organs as personal choices made to veer
toward folkloric, generic holistic living social
societal, theoretical fabric
minimally didst tear

which family of origin
constituent part (nurture)
nsync verses with nature (genetics)
steeped with ethos to share
with parents, row mans, siblings,
(now offspring), et cetera
superfluity sans abundance,
or paucity per cornucopia rear
neither former plentifulness,
nor latter scarcity respectively
predictable asper
being dynamic

versus static such yield
based, linkedin, and predicated
on a gamut how fate didst wield
one record breaking
catch of the century, and sealed

fickle non butterfinger
Swedish Fish Ma PHEAA filleted
famed schooled
Redmond Efficiency Academy
top of the class for each grade,
whence analogous
viz zit hid had dock
pier fickle lee hooray
randomly cast piscine line reeled inlaid
hallowed sea man tricked treat
once the providence,
which belief informed lifelike
sculpted, Idolized carved likeness

revealed from precious metal or jade
unseen creator mortals prayed
some examples being handily
accorded mechanistic multi-deistic
such as Manichaeism, Mithraism, Muslim,
et cetera belief, credo,
divine entity man made
attempting cosmic explanations
grandly incorporating
limitless mysteries splashed
throughout universe visually displayed

decrees ordained requiring unbridled zeal
only the dead privy
to espy secret seventh seal
hence ne'er did plentiful spirits reveal
themselves as flesh and blood,
nonetheless, despite lack of sects ap peal
fervent humility, integrity, magnanimity...
prayers preceded before each meal
or any exploitative endeavor,

especially those which did heal
instilling positive influences to hopefully
sway sought after immortal deal,
and ethos, figuratively drilled into arboreal

predecessors minds of highest
saint seeking achievers
and/ or ******* faithful devout believers
who oft morphed into zombie
thrashing maniacs seized cleavers
a yen to revile against heretics,
not moost ideal to breed largesse,
whence possessed by fevers

toward simple axe of pious,
who indulgently pulled levers
no matter feigned actions hash tagged
reciprocating masquerade
i.e. facade, charade afraid
but, nevertheless a Good Samaritan renegade.

Once again, I take momentary pause
to contemplate horrific event
regarding unleashing atomic warfare
activating nuclear brinkmanship,
hence time to trot out a poem
written initially some years ago
courtesy yours truly.

Robert Oppenheimer manned
"The Manhattan Project",
a top secret World War II mission                  
which constituted "Little Boy" codename
for a uranium gun-type
atomic bomb dropped at 0815

exploding 580 metres above civilians
with 15 kiloton blast yield
reduced 400 year old city to dust
Colonel Paul Tibbets,
the pilot/ bombardier
of the Enola Gay,

(the Boeing B-29 Superfortress
unleashing nuclear warfare
seventy six years ago today)
gives cause for this baby boomer to revisit
mentally, the annihilation,
extermination, incineration

the first of two storied Japanese enclaves
realizes how trifling my current bout
with mania paranoia, pneumonia
(from northern exposure)
contrasted with sinister
thermonuclear reaction

malevolent evil tower ushering
thermonuclear age epitomizing
coup de nada so graceful
means maximum military mutilation
though unwell, this inflammation poised
to be cured unlike subsequent
generations of victims

who survived atrocious, egregious, hellacious,
judicious slaughter can only poorly be described
by this mortal with curable bacterial/viral infection
aghast at such wanton killing, more-so
via weapons of mass destruction
more devastatingly grisly

than those "experimental" bombs
loosed upon the innocent population,
whereby 75,000 people killed or fatally injured
with 65% of casualties
nine years of age and younger
whence offspring of survivors
evincing excess genetic anomalies

with fiery windy surface (think towering infernos)
temperatures topping 4,000°C
upon terrain hallowed by ghastly
horrible deathly dominance
amidst shadow of sinister mushroom cloud
wickedly, ominously, and eerily looming.

I experience dread-nought
until April 19th, 2022 becomes yesterday
when troubles with management
here at Highland Manor
hoop fully temporarily alleviated.

Yours truly and the missus
personal living space
otherwise known as Unit B44
encroached, obtruded, and violated
predicated upon fruit fly infestation
justifying purported request for entry
into our one bedroom apartment.

Anticipatory anxiety put on high alert
when the warden gave less than a week
courtesy spluttering tone of voice
she did angrily blurt
nsync with her usual persona
being wickedly curt
treating us (myself and missus) like dirt
gloating in our writhing adversity

poor, sharecroppers,
no matter yours truly indigent
no matter exhaustive effort I do exert
to secure living income/wage, thus flirt
with visions of illusions grandeur
analogous to taut pulled belt girt
tightly around psyche whereby temple hurt
with unbearable agony
rendering these lovely bones inert.

Grosse and Quade Management
at 2 Highland Manor Apartments
with Jackie Geiger at the helm
finds yours truly afflicted with weak
praise, cuz she left us
(meself and the missus)
in figurative darkness,
whereby I electronically

soulfully bellow and shriek
seize the day
silently critiquing as if writing op/ed
for Time magazine and/or defunct Newsweek
perhaps under heading summarizing healthweek,
which hypothetical issue possibly considered
virtual collector's item
and subsequently unreal antique.

Stress unrelenting linkedin
to pesky of Drosophila melanogaster.

Fruit flies undergo
three stages of development
before emerging as adults:
egg, larva and pupa.

At room temperature,
fruit flies can develop
into adults within one to two weeks.

The egg and larval stages
span approximately eight days,
while the pupal stage lasts six days.

The adult fruit fly lives for several weeks.

Said pesky situation
warranted extermination services
to the tune between $100 and $175
for professional services
cuz countless instances arose regarding
swarm of itty bitty teeny weeny insect
thus aforementioned tab relegated
gifted as responsibility to yours truly
as threatened courtesy no nonsense
aforementioned heiress to the throne
of owners Grosse and Quade.

Methinks eviction in the offing,
though I will assertively
contact Fair Housing
if figurative push comes to shove
and broadcasts plea
for alternate place to reside
(ideally within Southeastern Pennsylvania)
including affordable low income rent.

Elysian fields embraced dada's soul
which rocketed into aerospace
(courtesy General Electric satellite)
just a tad more'n six months ago,
nevertheless melancholy
still plucks mine heart strings.

Mine psyche still situated awry
placid countenance of yours truly doth belie
residual sadness easily prompted
can easily trigger me to cry
linkedin when grim reaper gloated
October 7th, 2020
ye did somewhat peacefully die
though methinks immortality
I did briefly espy,

when miracles of modern medicine
tried, but could not
stave off mortality nor fortify
depredations of aging concerning
one wunderkind whose accomplishments
laudatory when a young handsome guy,
whose intelligence scored high
native talent aptitude tests did imply.

The late Boyce Brandon Harris
exhibited prolific talents at young age
aside being scholastically gifted,
acquiring graduate degree
courtesy Columbia University,
freshly minted mechanical engineer
(he admirably ranked within
uppermost percentile academically),
I hashtag thy mine deceased father
(a polymath - jack-of-all-trades),
who possessed (née excelled)
at diverse creative abilities.

Aside from being schooled
as mechanical engineer,
(which courses in mathematics and science
he passed with flying colors)
his mind genetically bequeathed
to craft almost anything under the sun
evidenced first by yours truly,
the second offspring and sole son
who ofttimes felt intimidated
at being in presence
of said Renaissance man.

Handicrafts included
expending blood, sweat, and tears
to craft multitude of projects;
i. building me Flintstone (foot powered)
car with wooden license plate.
ii. making playhouse for all three
of us - his progeny.
iii. amassing wood pile(s),
to stoke wood burning stoves
iv. designing Zayda trail for Teddy and Ruff
(two doggone mixed breed Border Collies
rescued courtesy youngest sister
at her Jacobsburg, Penna work site)
v. constructing sauna in cellar,

vi. etching, detailing (ala fresco),
vii. plus trimming living room ceiling,
viii. shingling (while fiddling) on the roof,
ix. tiling the kitchen floor,
x. building a cistern for brethren,
xi. wood paneling many rooms,
xii. building custom made toy chest,
xiii. stringing up lights to increase visibility
driveway lit like Christmas tree after dark,
xiv. partly assembled a kayak,
xv. retooling - enhancing porch
(formerly slate covered),
where Morris dancers performed
at wedding for eldest sister.

Unlike him who did beget me
I experienced cognitive challenges
that beset one painfully shy
and severely introverted male
more to the point
as a lad and mediocre student to boot
promotion to next highest grade
occurred just by the skin of my teeth,
which may help to explain
why I wear dentures,
oh... these choppers worn for about
one sixth of mein kampf livingsocial.

A sense of inadequacy prevailed,
when absolute zero self esteem
strikingly and suddenly manifested
in tandem when parents moved
their young tender family within
Lower Providence School District,
but into a larger house
(initial summer estate constituted
about one hundred acres of woodland -
named Glen Elm
think Winnie the Pooh -
house at Pooh corner -).

Not quite two score plus ten years
spent livingsocial at 324 Level Road
(above mentioned abode alluded),
and twas there majority
mine existential highs and lows,
where nadir of mein kampf transpired,
I emotionally hit rock bottom
upon onset of prepubescence
yet major event triggering
mine major depression
set in motion,
when parents chose February 28th, 1968
to move out of shoddily constructed domicile
located on Lantern Lane.

As shared with Renee Cardone
(the therapist whose virtual sessions
linkedin courtesy Doxy.me portal -
similar to Zoom),
that aforementioned date
marked a turning point
after which time, I floundered
experiencing irrevocable mental health issues
punctuating my psychological equilibrium
with chronic distress,
though I forgive father and mother
who unwittingly made decision to move.

Ah..., how I idolize the days of yore
before June twentieth, and twenty first
two thousand twenty three
when utter senselessness wore,
a trail of woe brutally
ravaging and savaging mine psyche,
yours truly attests gullibility tore
and rent asunder
leaving cumulative finances
decimated, pulverized, and frankly zapped
rendering me poor
as a Unitarian church mouse named Kishore
***** deed done dirt cheap extempore
courtesy yours oblivious to "red flags."

I still bitterly lament how
the computer/scammer
who called himself "Harvey Specter"
exhibited exceptional faux zeal
and blame myself,
whereby figurative cog and wheel
within sixty plus shades
housing mine gray matter
did not properly turn
ordinarily (when perspicacity,
sensitivity, and acuity optimally function)

setting off an ear splitting squeal
loud enough to rouse
a sleeping Leviathan
when upon awakening would bellow
now cue the giant
from Jack and the beanstalk
Fee-fi-fo-fum!
I smell the blood
of an Englishman:
Be he alive, or be he dead,
I'll grind his bones to make my bread.

Nevertheless significant loss
viz medium of exchange
(enriching the coffers of another -
particularly him that scoundrel
née fraudster foisting financial fiasco
frazzling father most definitely nonideal
modus operandi I envisioned,
hence the gofundme page
(ofttimes sited with
gentility, honesty, integrity...
when crafting previous poems),
yet passage of time did not heal

severe financial hemorrhage,
keeping checking and savings accounts
analogously under critical care
(think intensive care),
whereby heroic measures undertaken
wads of cold cash linkedin
to many intravenous tubes
but ideally capitol offense
aired once again toward remuneration
imposed upon ganef

who bled me dry
courtesy convincingly, glibly, liberally...
sweet talking his way,
and I swallowed hook, line and sinker
(fabrication that Citizens bank employees
scheming to siphon investments)
yielded zilch (the big goose egg),
absolute zero positive result,
i.e. even partial remittance of lost monies,
when yours truly did make an appeal.

Since pledging my troth
to the missus July 25th, 1996
after the comma error
punctuated mein kampf with disequilibrium.

Ever since the notions
of life, liberty and pursuit of happiness
coalesced within the mindscape
attributed to one
or more anonymous forebears
way before the advent of civilization
when written language preserved
(**** sapiens communicated
virtual primal groans and grunts),

nevertheless witnessing inchoate awakening
visa vis dawning enlightenment
bajillions of years after
earth, wind and fire
affected ideal environment
for Beatle browed foo fighters
Nirvana oriented proto humans
among rival capital one group
of beastie boys versus another.

Each subsequent generation embodied
propensity to acquire heavenly delight
characterized courtesy
storied primeval human associations
to wrestle with promotion
of mental, physical and spiritual autonomy.

Once self-determination awoke
animal hides did cloak
daggers if antagonism occurred
especially as high society
coaxed fibers inviting village people
to invent legislation to evoke
amity particularly once firearms
witnessed proliferation of gunsmoke
(and the Western genre as film noir)
after shoot-'em-ups erupted,
when scapegoat mustered courage

(after chomping powder milk biscuits)
bad to the bone bully underestimated chutzpah
courtesy said shy person,
yours truly did invoke
adulation and garnered
within figurative keystroke
generated winning vote
cast strictly by menfolk
if I vouchsafed would
NOT be pig in a poke

as happened countless millenniums later,
when forty fifth president
of lands slated to become
United States of America
would try to revoke
his successor mudslinging him,
(the latter, a common joe biden time),
a veritable teetotaler,
who swore, he rarely took a ****.

Blame aforementioned
blue collar Scranton boy yup
blimey bloke woke up
after leaving Oval Office
early one Autumn morning
bright eyed and bushy tailed
after an eight year stint,
whereby the electorate majority
approved former occupant
of “Executive Mansion”

(circa 2020 - 2028)
admitting admirable administration
donned hat of clown
earning a living wage
and taking page from playbook of bozo,
who brought good humor and laughter,
where tragedy wrought woe
visited webbed wired wide world
(once trod upon by the noble savage
as described by Jean-Jacques Rousseau)

whipping out trademark Dobro,
(a contraction of "Dopyera brothers"
and a word meaning "goodness"
in their native Slovak,
who introduced said instrument in 1928)
kickass nimble octogenarian
(accompanied by the band
Tripping Up Stairs)
performed outstanding show
capering, dancing, gliding,
high jumping, et cetera across the stage

hither and yon, to and fro
contagiously gifting, letting riotous hoopla
ring out across Land of Lake Wobegon
spontaneously kickstarting
audience of senior citizens
(including yours truly)
to shuck off mantle of senescence
(and clothes in the same process
after gaining courage
to join Barenaked Ladies)
hooting and trumpeting nouveau
playfulness summoning
rebirth of childlike spirit.

How carefree and ideal to identify
with mindset of Alfred E Neuman
Mad Magazine what me worry
unfortunately as a little boy
yours truly beset with mental health issues
Anorexia Nervosa the most serious
potential to develop healthily
self starvation eradicated
courtesy the expertise of psychiatrist
Ted Goldberg my parents did employ
subsequently eating disorder

manifested as hair obsession
with a vengeance,
when maybe some dozen years later
while completing a co-op
linkedin to enrollment at Antioch College
at facility I chose called
Chicago Ecology Resource Center in Illinois,
and who should make
a small teleporting cameo appearance,
but none other than Leonard Nimoy,
albeit his likeness manufactured as plastic
popular gewgaw enterprising toy.

Courtesy the most flimsy tenuous
designs linkedin to above lines
availed and linkedin thru
Unitarian Church affiliation while a youth,
(now negligible participant,
who would never join any group
that would accept me as a member)
an important connection throve with 1976
Norristown Area High School alum
Frankie Augustine Junior a brain,
plus admirable ruler
of tribbles and klingons to boot.

As an otherworldly webbed wordsmith,
I befriended said lad,
who became best earthling chum,
whose birthday (January eleventh
nineteen fifty nine) two days before mine,
our camaraderie did rattle and hum
until he attended Rensselaer
Polytechnic Institute (majoring
in nuclear engineering)
landing himself a plum job.

Our friendship since foundered
unlike the enterprising television show,
which captured the imaginations
of countless young and older people alike.

By 1986, 17 years after entering syndication,
Star Trek considered
the most popular syndicated series;
by 1987, Paramount made $1 million
from each episode;
and by 1994, the reruns
still aired in 94% of the United States.

into the unknown courting lovely lass
crafted four years ago to date
flying colors while eldest progeny
an undergraduate
at storied university did pass.

Even at a young age, she
first born of deux darling offspring
established herself as a high achiever
gifted as “star student,” motivated
maintained abiding diligence
linkedin with carpe diem
knew at a tender age ticket to paradise
forged in the cerebral chamber
stark realization necessity
to escape domestic dysfunction.

Beloved daughter dubbed "Munchkin",
an appellation engineered by "mother"
now evinces enviable survival skills,
this papa dismissed himself attaining,
and though sites set
to attain satisfactory income

courtesy asper keeping
your inherited Semitic
nose to the grindstone
(cute as a button)
toward fiercely dedicated
academic success to

acquire Bachelor's Degree
objective self instilled since "star student" -
(another moniker the missus aptly affixed)
amply proven successfully completing
undergraduate engineering degree
(a minor in je nais sais quois French),

this from storied high achieving Ivy League
University founded by Benjamin Franklin
this "sir" man once again
applauds laudatory milestone,
and additionally acknowledges
sincere appreciation surrendering

veritable treasure trove
commestibles, toiletries, vitamins...
allowing unswerving selflessness
to kindle tears of utmost gratitude
figurative biological dice throw
now embarks upon admirable

self reliant (no batteries needed)
time tested personal conviction
proving steely mettle with panache,
despite fallings out
undermining rapport during yesteryear,
when dada felt important,

evinced kibitizing, pampering,
reading requested stories,
(yea even Harry Potter - now passe)
aware how mine debauchery,
who set poor flagrant example

posited ye to escape appalling
financial, emotional, spiritual...
domestic conditions
ye understandably
envisioning more ideal legal guardian,
asper loco parentis

thus parting equals bittersweet
sorrow for dada, whose bottled anger
directly linkedin to opprobrious
selfish misdeeds compromising
psychological welfare two precious progeny
whose presence provided joie de vivre,

and never wanted restraint imposed
maturing into an admirable young lady,
no matter sentiments towards me
poisoned by toxicity, whose
predilection to debilitating panic
undermined, restrained, quashed...
necessary needs and wants

to nourish healthiness...
despite aggravating, hellbent
nerve wracking time consuming
odiously infernal exhausting
drive to accept donations,
i.e. personal belongings...
dada doth care for thee!

The following poetic account
written more'n a dozen ***** dancing decades ago,
while I (a socially withdrawn **** Sapiens)
one indigent Yahoo
groveled along (on a secret Msn)
along boulevard of broken dreams,
whereby yours truly forced to eat crow
quite challenging cuz
wonky twittering angry birds
alive and well darting hither and yon to and fro
able, eager, ready, and willing
to gouge out the eyes of one common Joe.

Arduous agonizing affliction
didst unrelentingly assault and assail...
aghast to exhale... lest I would lose
desperate clinging clutch
held by more'n one
but less than eleven  
bloodied cracked fingernail
phantasmagoric phalange *******
like tendrils constricted
stoppering me to whisper or wail

against being swallowed
courtesy COSMOFUNNEL
into hello poetry tumblr
(think Alice in Wonderland
falling into rabbit hole)
yawning abyss menacingly beseeched
hmm...release could immediately curtail
cumulative (lifetime's worth) travail
freefalling at lightspeed, jump/
kick starting pirouetting unnervingly,

unstoppably, unwaveringly... zipping
into edge of night
along the outer limits
of the twilight zone
defining, harboring lurking dark shadows
spelling infinite black hole sun - hell
buzzfeeding me where linkedin
earthlinked hotmail of pinterest,
suffering lovely bones would ail
making minced meat out of me

“****” analogous to an imagine aery dragon
vanish as guilt – courtesy didst hail
analogous storm trooper peppering
Pennsylvanian's psyche... with eternal jail
time for eternity excluded option
asper garden variety baby boomer male,
albeit the father of deux darling daughters,
the eldest (broke vow of silent communication),
she reached out after
months long hiatus telltale
sign indications to accept genuine apology

her biological father (me) culpability
regarding destitution raged against hurtfulness,
he affixed indelible psychological
scars each etching indelible travail
boomeranged back to yours truly duress
during her impressionable years, she did rail
and rant similar to countless
previous conversations, the scale
innocent intelligent progeny, we begat
(myself and misses) financially ill prepared
to provide respectable accommodations.

Our "dirt poor" status detrimental
livingsocial among affluent MainLine
incomes luxe Lower Merion
living costs fateful design
neighbors cursed, ostracized, vilified...
unsightly unkempt property (i.e. unmanicured)
intolerant snobs didst malign
child welfare services called NOT to dine,
but emphatic for papa and mama to align
dwelling safe and secure for minors
and miners for a heart of gold

yes, I attest despicable living conditions
crowded house with Zison heirlooms
owners - malignant hoarders did confine
considerably reducing cubic feet,
they relations of spouse evicted us
ready to point carbine
at temple...quicker than noose
dead of winter 2010 near homelessness
relocated within "roach motel" decline
'twixt omnipotent covalent
carbonic, harmonic, opportunistic bond

among our dynamics with offspring
livid with rage, asper an inferno no divine
comedy compounded by lascivious
behaviour - mine to hasten dateline
enduring helplessness, hardship
being alive plus brandished carving knife
against self witnessed...I assign
poor marks as paternal parent,
who bemoans loathsome
impact...this papa gropes toward hotline
writhing with agony
worse fate than swallowing quinine!

Excusing yourself as if...
going to the bidet,
an immense water closet
(perhaps the size of
Mar A Lago type getup),

sans human waste
(after flushing hearing
heavenly suctioned whoosh)
empties into prez Donald's bay,
where one *** wrapped aforementioned
toilet finely (and finally) enthrones

derriere exquisitely, and, delicately
intricately, chiseled wrought with cloisonné
ah...enjoying simple pleasure a$$ I say
sipping one after another Red Bull, whence
with one final trumpet of the **** -

(as acknowledgment to angry 1%),
though quite reluctantly did pay -
hitting the custom built in combination
handsome replica Taj Mahal fountainhead golf
course made from clay

baked Adobe bathroom links
(whew...long Atlas) shrugging off
responsibilities, escorted
by migrant compadre
Russian Putin lookalike uncannily

also resembles plucked Kernel Sanders
advocating consuming buttered Thomas
English muffins with oreos can delay,
tending to government, who successfully
playfully, melodiously preaches, sermonizes

and absolute zero values benefits burning
off calories, where couples sashay,
asper square and/or contra dancing,
where the caller hollers hip hip hooray
barely audible above

noisy fracas and fray
of crowded house,
avast throng of village people stomp
louder than a quiet
riot global military foray

anathema to dogma,
karma, persona... of
Jacques Cousteau, or green like
minded millennials and/or gray
bearded whelk homed by elasmobranchii.

The following lines written disjointed fashion
attempting to mimic strategically
moving pieces erratically on chessboard
ideally yielding ultimate resultant checkmate
opposing men captured for the queen to use.

Jurassic throwback terrible lizards
with horrific, capitalistic, and academic
counterproductive mindset atavistic
protohuman spit out fast as fired ballistic,
when he cast characteristic
long haired pencil necked geek
trademark, yours truly a mere embryonic
nudnik, nonetheless I venture
to advance hypothesis fantastic,

compulsive disorder fatalistic
harrowing, debilitating attacks,
generalized anxiety frenetic
housed within chromosomal material generic
conjecture deoxyribonucleic genetic
failures, (I will spare double helix graphic)
details only offering synopsis
such as anorexia nervosa,
generalized anxiety, obsessive

compulsive human being eventually
transforming coalescing into hermetic
progeny afflicted with psychological honorific
mutations rendering him beset with idiosyncratic
faulty cognitive mental health issues
corporeal and spiritual essence intrinsic
being christened Matthew Scott Harris,
disposition and moost definitely laconic
contemplative, intuitive, perceptive

demeanor most evident mindset
Offenbach to boyhood, I pined nostalgic
Tale of (H)offman woe (mine)
linkedin, speedier than quick
brown fox jumps over the lazy dog,
schizoid personality disorder deeply affecting
mental, physical and spiritual bailiwick
super tramping as some cheap trick
thriving, albeit teetotaling opportunistic

mailer daemons upending
generally articulate, delicate, intricate... pacific
also riddled with predilection toward panic
soon after conception, when
power - pointed excellent outlook
encompassing fatalistic, nihilistic, pathetic,
wherein unbeknownst manifest destiny poetic
primate took shape pronouncing
said gent bent courtesy agent quixotic

purposeless quirky ritualistic
beastie boy propensity, who must exit
regarding call of the wild this urbane rustic
and farfetched realm as said theoretic
danse macabre doppelganger - mine,
not necessarily universalistic
as unfavorable inherited, plus behavioral trait
housed within mine impenetrable
hermetically sealed invisible bubble

draped with blackened Hades
hued habiliment therein dwelt
sinister saboteur mastermind marauder
of the Hubble unseen but felt,
who demanded sacrifice
to traverse River Styx
with unadulterated gelt
which known phantasmagorical double,
whose piercing fiery ocular presence
thine true self amidst the aftermath

from Armageddon rubble
astride charred global ruins
entire civilization did melt
entire planet prognosticated
by Maya sages with 11th hour stubble
birthed this Darth Vader nemesis
with evil upon earth he did pelt
annihilating mankind,
the derelict species that fueled trouble,
hence evil twin
appointed apocalyptic malevolence spelt
with mass crematorium desecration
left horrific blistering welt.

Countdown to **** sapiens extinction
predicted millenniums in past
to occur December 21
two thousand and twelve after common era
(going on ten years past due date)
whereby catastrophic spark
detonating inferno incinerating blast
eradicating extant flora and fauna
bereft sans hegira
with no means to interrupt the die
since the dawn of civilization cast.

Impossible mission to escape ominous
predetermined fate of human rat race
nor turn back hands of time
with origin of species on clock face
thus ticking closer to hour of doomsday
without faith to brace
allowing, enabling and providing Gaia
to redeem terrestrial space
vestiges of teeming billions
soon erased criminal minds without a trace
forcefully relinquishing simians

planetary stranglehold amazing grace
proffering tabula rasa for
another dominant species to claim the place
sirens promulgate emergency
toward impending inescapable cataclysm
yet no place to run or hide
lest one boards a rocket light-years away
which makes suspense thrillers
birthed by John Grisham
enviable plot to keep
Earth's total destruction at bay.

Although heterosexual
predilections punctuated
physiological pulsations
about five inches below
innie belly button of mine
showcasing undersize
male member, when fully *****
not much to crow
about, contributed
diminished masculinity within
body electric regarding

wordsmith crafting poem
linkedin with his feelings
of diminished machismo
male sexuality sputtered
courtesy handy dynamo
powered ample male
germ cells birthing offspring
two healthy females born
approximately twenty six
months apart, thine eldest
born right at Capricorn

cusp, and youngest made
her debut exactly where
Aquarius midpoint bitter
cold day ideal for Esquimau
one grateful father
prematurely ******* fantastico
blessed gift, which helped
reinforce against being
emasculated empowered
at reproductive prowess
happy as a lark feeling

indomitable as Geronimo
an Apache leader and
medicine man best known
for his fearlessness
in resisting anyone–Mexican
or American, who attempted
to remove his people
from tribal lands ruinous
and sacrilegious historico
plus torturous legacy settlers
gawking, kickstarting

and muckraking mistruths
about indigenous people
shamelessly reducing
so called "noble savages" as
one after another charade,
façade ******* up lame
excuse to invade sacred
hallowed lands impresario
gigs stereotypical presumptions
didst buzzfeed fire
re: kindling sparking eventual

their genocide insult
to injury courtesy diatribe
deliberately fomenting ill
will, where Native peoples
at receiving end of jingo
token "fake" reverence
bestowed upon rightful awk
queue pants place evidenced
courtesy place name
whether state, county,
borough... such as Kickapoo

hollow benevolence meted out,
but obliterating cult
chore wars hashtagging
"redman," courtesy eminent
domain of "Turtle Island"
indignantly stolen by Forbe
heirs by trumpeting
school of vandals battering down
millenniums back once
impregnable walls of Jericho
indefatigable marauders

wrought wrongs upon in us
sent occupants proclaiming
might of arms justifiable
reason (not necessarily with rhyme)
to smote women
men and children down
with deadly force transforming
happy go lucky agrarian
festive folks thriving landscape
courtesy brute force
utilizing mo' sophisticated weapon

re: of mass destruction
rendering harmonious leitmotif
presaging tranquility said
near picture perfect Kodak
moment lifestyle into
veritable charnel/slaughterhouse
desecrating thence scattering
lovely bones + trappings
of then helplessly, melancholically
quickly vanishing oral
culture to the four winds,

where archeologists painstaking
efforts piece together
long extinct histories analogous to
All the king's horses and
all the king's men couldn't put
Humpty together again,
nevertheless tragedy writ large
indelibly etched upon
collective consciousness longview
hounding one doggone
muttering long haired pencil neck

geek three score plus four years;
he reflects upon ****
sapiens wanton killing
of docile brothers and sisters part
and parcel of same genus
and species differentiated by:
creed, gender, language,
nationality, race, religion, ***,
et cetera since time immemorial
inherited without choice

genetic predisposition nsync
with environmental influence
(liberal Unitarian upbringing)
wages internal war against
himself, and times gone
by mentally toyed with notion of
homosexuality, yet never acted
upon said impulse
somewhat attributed and linkedin
with anticipated regret.

courtesy third person singular.

Mise en scène pour décès
pardon his feeble attempt at French,
a unilingual English language
quibbling, and scribbling mensch
strongly advises applying
left handed monkey wrench,
which custom designed tool
assigned impossible mission
to discern sense and sensibility
regarding following poetic thread
subject of a fool's errand.

Mein kampf witnessed, punctuated,
and evinced courtesy final breath
automatically triggering (tumblr
to activate) final curtain call
and unremarkable death.

As stipulated in the living will
cremation of his lifeless body
cremated into soft gray powder.

A prerecorded hashtagged obituary
downloaded to individual smartphones
and simultaneously appeared on
the following poetry websites:
COSMOFUNNEL, Hello Poetry,
Neopoet, My Poetic Side, Poetry Soup,
PoetryNook, PoetryVibe, Prose|
A community of readers and writers,
and All Poetry.

He hesitated and lost out
on game of life big time
even fumbling crafting reasonable rhyme
noshing, spending, and whiling
inordinate amount of hours
squirreled away in his bedroom
surrounding himself with reading material.

He amassed fountainhead of knowledge
quietly engorging cerebral gray matter
whereat noggin swelled up
rivaling globe, but Atlas shrugged
at him, whose head
resembled the first Chinese brother
who swallowed the sea.

Odd his voracious appetite
to buzzfeed with one
after another binary byte
zealous precocity to engross himself
with storied reading material
that does extremely excite
(at the expense of healthy socialization)
where his imagination took flight,
nevertheless myopic eyes of his

did glean insight
keeping his button nose
between pages of choice morsels
to appease hunger
keeping himself awake
drinking high test coffee
during darkness aided by jacklight
processing meaty material with might
experiencing abundant, exultant,

intoxicant, over-extravagant
joie de vivre day or night,
a balm, elixir, inebriate... quite
the panacea to abet emotional incapacitation
which entails crafting poems
oftimes spending efforts
with efforts undertaking rewrite
unwittingly garnering a fanbase
courtesy ideology doth unite.

Analogous to Möbius strip -
measured passage of existence
seems to defy any beginning or end
(unless Artificial Intelligence
supersedes developers smarts
of computer technology
evincing brain power
designing sophisticated machines
that enslave their creators)
incorporating figurative

uber plug n play
genetic material imperceptibly
becoming modified to offer
advantageous lyft to maneuver
weathering adverse circumstances
which series of unfortunate events
proffered entry point
for Lemony Snicket
an underappreciated character
only took precedence

with **** sapiens ascendent
bursting forth upon
the figurative pedestal
presiding over domain,
sans Earthly covenant
a bajillion ago,
where fits and starts
pitted proto humans
at no immediate advantage,
yet merely, thru

dint of accidental
happenstance ever so
imperceptibly amassed dominion
over every other species
cue **** erectus
an extinct species
of archaic human
from the Pleistocene,
with its earliest occurrence
about two million years ago,

specimens among the first
recognizable members
of the genus ****
as became evident
throughout the vast sweep of
anthropological
evolutionary incidental
plucky perturbations, provocations,
and/or pullulations arisen by
spontaneous circumstantial grant

ting quasi consciously
coalescing into nasty,
short and brutish bipedal hominids
deliberated focused intent,
where forethought
coopted indiscriminate
chance facilitating kent -
state manifested rubber
baby buggy bumpers
activated, aggrandized, and

allotted destiny meant
to lurch incrementally
i.e. hierarchical designation
present day primate
predecessors practiced negligible
fletched, notched, and
worsted nimbleness orchestrated
(equal parts gall and genetic
giftedness), whatsapp operant
adaptation toward

survival rippled quiescent lyft
minutely nudging overt salient
traits ineluctably
manifesting, outflanking,
and proffering
quintessential urgent
biological scrimmage quietly testing,
and wrestling, whence yen
(to secure rootedness
favoring survival of the fittest)

zeroing what didst warrant
winning formula
to adapt adroit edge
pitted by dictates of nature
grappling iron
grip, viz literal hedge
fund and kickstarting toehold
upon tenuous ledge
(oft times succumbing to danger)
falling into abyss

of anonymity pledge
kindled acquired innovative tool
such as a primitive sledge
hammer instinctively
resigning animal instinct
death be not proud not
before inculcating
survivalist tactical wedge.

versus being alive
predicated victory videre licet lunatic
if Trump ******* Kamala Harris
and stole 2024 presidential election,  
(whereat Musk bribed
significant number of voters
handing out wads of cash)
courtesy underhanded modus operandi
and devious and sinister schemes.

Forlorn; bereft of golden
(slippered) opportunities I weep;
Three score and five years
replete with mailer daemons,
hence mindset adrip
with self denouncing
expletive filled bleep
unwritten expressed recriminations
wielded upon figurative
head of wimpy blip;
decades elapsed at light speed clip

as the world turned
days of mein kampf
exhibited slow psychologically
torturous analogous intravenous slow drip
during emerging adulthood
approximately half life of mine,
when yours truly painstakingly
besotted with unrequited love
accursed extreme introvertedness
severely hobbled coping ability

still reeling after being scammed
gobs of greenbacks
approximately sixteen months ago
gifted at birth with congenital weakness
such as being gullible to ruthless conartists
mama's boy lacked ways and means
integrating himself among peers:
no supportive services to equip
shy lonely lad devoid of fellowship
even as grown man
lost in space whereat

maximum head room cramped
with obsessive compulsive thoughts
social services slated for chopping block
if Project 2025 implemented
and if father or mother
were alive they would flip
at the course of political divisiveness
sowed by MAGA
onymous nasty brute,
where palmar hyperhidrosis
affected slippery grip

in tandem with being diminutive
aiming to experience
childhood's end forever
son of a gun flailed
with dating later in life
analogous to psyche
subjected to fracking
compromising, forsaking, and issuing
counter productively undermining
potential heterosexual relationships
invariably shooting from the hip.

Nine different prescription medications
allow umpteen combinations to yield
against bombardment that fate doth wield
delivered, signed and sealed
courtesy the grim reaper
able, eager, ready and willing
to maneuver across pitted minefield
accessing exiled soul whisking
vis a vis grim reaper same
to idyllic place named Edenfield.

Oftimes methinks
how cessation to breathe
spirit buoyed aloft,
where garlands wreath
to escape hell on Earth,
where neurosis and psychosis seethe
within mine sixty plus five
shades of crumbling sheet rock
think scree ming atrophying gray matter
symbiotically, dramatically,
and alphabetically flourishing
at expense of sanity
case in point being

anxiety/ panic attacks
obsessive compulsive behavior,
schizoid personality disorder,
long in the tooth fellow
his sustenance similar to pablum
constituting imperial diet of worms
of the Holy Roman Empire -
called by Emperor Charles V
fit for grown baby,
especially when removing dentures
cuz he must resort to eat soft foods
unless by some miracle I teethe
for the third time.

Homegrown destructive force
muscles, tussles, wrestles,
et cetera within me
likened to (but separate from) Intifada,
(thus no insinuation this wordsmith
linkedin to any militant group)
grips mine soul asylum,
a recalcitrant doppelganger
within windmills of my mind
doth insidiously, poisonously,
and unpleasantly drum
palpably affecting writer
of these words to feel glum.

No respite whether I repose
in deep slumber or lightly awake
inescapable melancholic woes
haunts these lonely bones,
whereby system of the down
houses reticent persona constituent feature
characterized courtesy anhedonia
linkedin with passive suicidal ideation
accentuated when severe crisis erupt
analogous to smoldering volcano.

Fortunate for me the missus keenly aware
plus (despite every now and again
contention between us),
she makes crystal clear
communicating her displeasure
mixed with genuine fear
bantering deadpanning facetiously
gallows humor I half heartedly asseverate
gibberish spouting jargoneer
gravely alarms wife helpless to orienteer

conversation away from my demise,
thus figuratively switch horses
in mid stream and jockey
to calm her down
and lightning verbal exchange
by ******* from the waist down
revealing laughing stock of skinny legs
(easily mistaken for spindleshanks)
poking thru underwear
charging on imaginary steed

feigning being loco
despite NOT smoking ****,
energetic cavorting courtesy
nursing high test coffee,
nevertheless ineffective battling fatigue
despite flitting to and fro,
hither and yon bumbling along
(skeletal) joints of mine smoking hot
suddenly after sipping strong brew,
I temporarily shuck off lethargy

long enough break to out dancing
while simultaneously overtaken
to sing a song of sixpence
while wings flutter at the speed of sound
buzzfeed appetite for consumption
Ecclesiastical History of the English People,
one of our best-written sources
for early English history
authored by Venerable Bede.

Found yours truly
a grateful dead head
convenient scapegoat dejure
Norristown police officers
fingerprinted me for
casual postal employment
linked to vicious brutal crime
someone else who shared
identical name and fingerprints as mine
the latter of corpse far fetched
stole social security

I ream member –
being held ransom
bound and gagged
if paperback writer
wrote story resultant account
would total about 300 newpages
printed August 16th, 2019.
    
Despite never committing
major criminal offense
routine dactylogram
pointed ****** finger of guilt
at me, and an all expense trip
paid to high security prison.

I initially thought ruse
as cruel prank (Ritz large),
and utter nonsense
good humor quickly melted away
nsync with sense and sensibility
after getting roughly manhandled
courtesy dense sumo size wrestlers
(think Andre the giant)
humongous state troopers.

They spoke staccato rapid
fire automatic gunfire tongue
with unfamiliar accents,
and kept no holds barred
steely iron tense grip
upon this skinny, shy, scared...
long haired pencil necked geek.

Said uniformed, nasty mean looking,
heavily muscled, pierced, tattooed...
armed to the dagger oh type teeth
gendarmes escorted, forced, shoved...

These foo fighters,
not friendly village people,
nor Mister Fred Roger type gents
violently tossed yours truly...
carelessly knocked out
any remaining toothless cents
from out my noggin.

Slam dunked me
into back seat bullet proof
partitioned cheaply tricked
paddy wagon went these lovely bones.

Events of my life passed
before myopic mind's third eye blind.

These hooligans counted as nothing
but hoodlums from Bedlam.

A "FAKE" outlaw film
of unreel projections,
unspooled, and untethered
within fifty shades of fist size gray matter.

Surreal elegance definitely
case of mistaken rather stolen identity
perpetrator(s) data mined
under my uber outsize honker
mine outside Semitic schnozzle
created double blind spot.
    
Yea twas while aye became entranced,
mesmerized, yoked (albeit visually)
courtesy aromatic exotic incense
held this hybrid piqued bishop,
chain mailed (gratis
United States postal service)
good knight captive,
where agents provocateurs
kickstarted, out maneuvered,
and pinned yours truly with engulfed  
par excellence for the course.

Aforesaid mean drama
played out across mine
mien anxiety riddled body electric.

Analogous to once upon time
life size chess board,
I felt marshalled
(tuckered out nonetheless)
like life size pawn
gambled as live pièce de résistance.