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Zealousness prevails to amass knowledge
lifequest nsync toward expansive lexicon
extant since yours truly kneehigh toddler
inquisitive mind fired passion to steep me
within inexhaustible voluminous treasure
trove housing increasing bound knowledge

inexplicable to thyself, wherefore heartfelt
ineradicable passion to sequester attention
between newpages of selective genres for
hours experiencing intellectual ecstatic nee
******* excitation sustains purposefulness
as explains escapist redoubt within mental

framework, thee singularly soulful asylum
offering me cerebral satiation, sedation, and
solution to cope with unbearable millstone
linkedin with emotional/psychological pain
wrought courtesy neurological mutation all
throughout tender years, when one doth seek

natural predilections in tandem toward naked
lunch (heady salad days lettuce not go there),
quite the contrary this socially malnourished
individual burrowed within reading material
even now tickles fancy of mine johnny come
lately body electric exploring, crafting, and

allowing milieu writing to pacify, gratify and
codify mindset never entertaining delusions
of grandeur (hypothetically envisioning to
discover friendship (even platonic) regard-
ding another, who exudes similar love with
words, though accepting fickle human nature

at most hope flickr of ephemeral pinterest
maintains attention of anonymous reader
rabbit nibbles morsel of recondite tidbit, and
synchronizing ever so briefly with logophile,
whose aura, charisma, dogma, karma, persona...
hoopfully brings even an ad hoc “FAKE” smile.
Doth strongly waft, sting,
and nauseate about me
olfactory nose flying zone
bombarding cilia of
nasal passageway analogous
to displeasure wrought by

crashing, deafening, exploding,
ear splitting xylophone,
also synonymous isolated like
barenaked lady within
remote location of Lake Woebegone,
voluntarily forced to bathe

in brutally cold
mountain waters oxbow lake
vaguely resembling out
size topographical wishbone
rescue unlikely since
bajillion miles from radio tower,

thus state of the art
electronically sophisticated videophone
good as worthless resignation,
sans fate linkedin tubby
mother nature's cryogenic specimen
more'n murmuring undertone,

where huge Arctic glacier overshadows
infinitesimally microscopic human,
one speck kin zee ditched
**** sapien subsumed
under superfluous tombstone
as frozen fountain head,

where Atlas shrugged,
nonetheless incongruous yen
to purge mine offensive odor,
where civilization footprint
sole lee mine alone in wilderness
thus farcical reason (without rhyme),

atypical, farcical, and poetical title,
yours truly didst stirrup and spur
inexplicable search for soapstone,
yet prospect to don measly frame
without gay apparel

(beastie boy bit figurative bullet,
and buttressed body in buff)
immediately augmented primal scream
to trumpet heebeegeebees
(teeth chattering yodeling
rendition re: stayin alive)

from this Rhinestone
survivalist cowboy wannabe,
began feeling comfortably numb,
and immediately prone
to become human popsicle,
especially when sub zero temperature

immediately froze water splashed skin
(like glassy sheet of ice)
glancing viz albedo effect
as blindingly white
snow capped mountains outshone
albino crags, offering

absolute zero, yes none
reassurance with insulated moonstone
sleeping bag useful
as yolked with lodestone
around neck - slow death by
freezing this knucklebone,

who sought cleanliness,
(and panacea to immortality)
joining exclusive polar bear club
(Ursus Maritimus very selective,
and only chose me) even
at expense of more'n

just frozen jawbone
plus Jack frost bitten cockles turned
deep purple as inkstone
used to write re: scrawl epitaph
on icicle glommed headstone.
Holy mole lee
watch out fowl, balladeer
look out... i.e. donkey kong
primate doth share
footloose slothful writing,
essentially swiftly tailored hare

reed styled mountebank
gets made by mice elf,
an imperfect triangulated square,
while "fake" charioteer
looses neigh scent horsesense
glomming "fake" papier

mâché piñata across animal planet
rhyme without reason,
nonetheless who doth dare
dovish and/or hawkish
elk quint lee otter vamoose
double, triple, quadruple... dare

to caw meow ta
as silence rings loud and clear
ja hiss don't miss snake
pig in a poke hogtied
sow owl only tell ya beware
me dogged holy cow

cuckoo bird harebrained
effort won't impair
corpus collosum, where
seat of thinker housed
fortunately ye ant near
my neck of the woods here

Schwenksville cuz after
innocuous, impetuous, illustrious...
brainstorming deluge... glare
til hearts content
with nostrils that flare
lemming just be reel

regarding rocky mission
opossum bull, I swear
dogged bonafide effort
thanks ocelot to bear
with beetle browed toadying

off fish hill who accidently
didst entrap and snare
courtesy hook line and sinker
masterly baited metaphorical
Earthworm dangling cyber air

**** sitter me batty
*** sin nine, I admittedly duck lear,
but don't badger me, Noah
ark confess with prayer
yak see no porpoise here.
181 · Nov 2018
My Treatment Plan
Electroconvulsive therapy,
     a last ditch avail
able effort optioned, aye bewail
as desperation if standard
     psychological measures peter

     out leave ving paul tree
(paltry) choice, and blackmail
ling Doctor Frankenstein
     out of the question, cuz
     accidental discover re:

     visa vis could yield (ahem) grave
     zero APR, hence bad
     (bon jovian) medicine
     sought as precautionary
     measure to countervail

undesirable repercussions
     hoop fully curtail
ling any unexpected derail
ment, thus every nitty gritty detail,
asper my treatment plan

made purposely intractable
courtesy Matthew Scott Harris,
     to flummox decrypting
     this daunting task, whose
     hair brained scheme didst entail

hatching with Sam I am
    (of Doctor Zeus fame)...Oh...My...G_
egg gads no fail-
safe recourse, should shell shock
     Electroconvulsive – formerly electric shock

     therapy even slip an infinitesimal jot
     offsetting requisite
     exactly predicted results
     yes, even if precision errs
     by a mere clipped fingernail...

the sought after outcome
     (devised on the fly - by night
     Reddit writer above named author)
must absolutely dovetail
     with The Elements of Style

or very close
     facsimile thereof, anyway
strict requirements quality controlled
     with results tubby
     sent as email

to Strunk and White,
     who will flail
like some GMO gone awry
     (if patient accidentally electrocuted)
     finding them to become

     instantaneously petrified and frail
looking analogous to
     witnessing the Holy Grail
shattering into a bajillion pieces,
     whereby the heavens,

     would reign hail
scaring every last man,
     woman, and child to hightail
donned in heavy duty boots
     studded with many a hobnail

with duff feet, sans long arm of
     law and order on their heels,
     and if any scapegoats nabbed
     definitely consigned to jail
without chance of parole to prevail

no matter guilty might sail
to some tropical island awash
     with countless carbon copies
     of Euell Gibbons doppelganger,
and Swiss Alpine like mountains to scale.
what else... his trademark blatherskite!

While sprawled comfortably
numb upon davenport
Iowa daily dose of poetic mishmash,
thus yours truly couches, kneads, sports...
his imponderable matted
swiftly styled balderdash
noah intent to kindle
potential ark enemy, nor abash

please pardon your
garden variety philologos,
preparing himself for backlash
he spouts nonsense words
with chutzpah and brash
his logorrhea affliction begets
meaningless rot i.e. namely ishkabibble,
where scapegoated test dummies crash

inscrutably, dumbly, busily blankly
boxing, blinking, batting... eyelash
hijacking, flouting, disregarding... covenant,
not causing corpus callosum damage
basically self made edict equals hogwash,
within one North American banana republic
predicated upon fiat gnash
trumpets blatantly non subliminal,

subordinate, subtle... ** hum
messages cuz bosh to liberty we smash
with most popular refrain
"send her/him back" cash
hearing purported dispensable
deportee with swash-
buck killing bravado
marquee, where klieg lights
blindingly broadcast in a flash.

"FAKE" mania loosed doth stall
refugees, where desperation witnesses
land of milk and honey,
perhaps some heading to Broomall,
who if necessary crawl
escaping forced *** trafficking poverty,
persecution, violence... downfall,
viz puppet government

tricked out noble (no bull) border wall
configured as demilitarized zone
hostilility spewing noxious,
poisonous, venomous gall
courtesy commander in chief
who essentially hoops to forestall
his impeachment proceedings
bristling, ranting, scathing... twitter feeds

spewing bosh raining hatred filled squall
spouting jingoistic rhetoric
atop anointed hall
of the mountain king
eerily similar to Taj Mahal
firing expletive epithets

assenting military mandating withdrawal
loosing vicious police and/or junkyard dogs
declaring no exemption against marshall
law innocence absolute zero guard
as sharp teeth nsync with flesh maul
cue hideous sinister laughter
welcome to danse macabre ball!
courtesy prescription laxative AMITIZA

and found (me) zee papa pooped out,
thus embarrassing communiqué I post,
a reasonably rhyming poetic shout
to air grievances
concerning outsize bowel movement
hoping (fat/slim chance)
Mike Rowe happens tubby about,
though shadow of doubt
he will avail himself.

**** eyes zing thee
nightly dump for yesterday
January 31st, 2022 - whereby
plying plunger in vain, cuz suction
barely helped obstruction give way
I nearly lost me life and limb oy vey
oh my dog, the same asinine outcome
which spurred poet to get underway
matter of fact, a replay

of excretion almost occurred today
and thus an attempt to describe
a tragicomic scenario
regarding bowel movement size of subway
an urgent message to maintenance person,
yours truly must relay
overflowing ***** nearly
found yours truly quay

king, yet impossible mission arises to portray
unsightly situation, the
juvenile elements of harried style
I hate to overplay
odoriferous subject matter
nsync with constipation
since laxative delineates,
expedites, facilitates,... née

posits heavy load emanating out ******
quite amazing what smelly waste exits out me
necessitating captain my captain
to signal emergency mayday
posterior end, a dime size orifice,
which malfunctioning sphincter muscles
one moost never be lackaday
'though kids and adults

laughed back in the day,
if and/or when Danny Kaye
tactfully poked fun
at such critical ****** phenomenon
equally important as a jackstay
to keep afloat body electric
'curse with auxiliary accouterments interplay
analogously precise as

Swiss made timepiece
said system responsible
to expel ****** toxins
upon which sitting on porcelain throne
one can softly utter hooray
thankful to experience relative pleasure
until one becomes feeble minded,
whereat sixty plus shades of gray

matter allows, enables, and
provides enjoyably foray
into the bathroom, which entranceway
hoop fully not barred nor off limits
cuz that primitive urge one best not delay
lest one requires lower
gastrointestinal intervention
especially if blocked up

***** matter turns to clay
unless of course one doth
cause damage and betray
respect toward well
oiled human machine
exercising and eating healthy
avoiding backside skeleton musculature issues
yes... I reckon during twilight years
control over bowels doth slip away.
Pow War Full Pointed Outlook

As I ponder what to write
today august thirtieth
      two thousand eighteen,
     thy ploy doth in vite
a gamut of spontaneous thoughts,
     that loosely cluster
     before becoming tight
lee bound toward

     quasi definitive agreeable, amenable,  
     and attainable in sight
with no deliberate intent
     to suppress perspective
     couched asper left of political right,
though mine embedded
     liberal democratic ideology
     automatically shifts, gingerly

     escorts, inherently focuses,
     and understandably dodges quite
unconsciously, naturally, and expressly
     viz zit ting orientation trained mindset
     spiked railroad ties to follow
     a NON "FAKE" conservative track,
     cuz existential plight
of this run of the

     NON mill (let) airy night
owl hoot trumpets,
     thru his pen chant
     pedantic laden poetic might
(albeit gently modest)
     with artful badinage,
     garbage, and persiflage light
nsync with his (my) being,

     an aspiring good (rook key) knight
calculating, formulating, intuiting,
     where to shine
     his (mine) figurative jacklight
asper shying away
     NOT to antagonize
     predicated on me
     humble extrasensory insight

drawing, distancing, and detaching
     metaphorical grip,
     sans innate bias height
end from lifetime
     steeped within progressive
     (forward thinking atheistc) paradigm,
     hence impossible to adopt
     a totally tubularly neutral

     point of view presents avowed challenge
     to present opinions of yours truly
     without instigating a verbal
     and/or virtual gunfight
boot hoop fully friendship,
     asper attempting tubby forthright,
and apologizing for

     any stinging backlash
     if accidental affront,
     thus encouraging healthy
     discourse without excite
ting vitriolic, toxic,
     and/or dramatic dogfight
with this cat tug gar rick cull
     poet hood dont bite!
a worse hellish fate than perdition really *****

As of early morning
today - September 8th, 2022,
I could not but barely move
mine whole body felt
analogous to sluggish mollusk
frequent constipation found me
doubled over in gastrointestinal agony
as if elephant stomping on tummy
or red livid with rage.

I've re: created how bull
heaver in fiber figuratively ****** his tusk
into lower abdominal area dawn to dusk
ah...voila... hence subsequently
blessed natural laxative,
the magic of Daily Fiber
100% natural psyllium husk
also known as metamucil.

Once again sphincter muscle(s)
spasmodically malfunctioned awry
whew suppository unnecessary
despite gastrointestinal stoppage
alimentary canal thwarted
porcelain goddess battlecry
at least seventy two hour time span
lapsed whereby big boy wanted to cry
explaining how yours truly
felt he would die
an undertaking malaise

found me experiencing
physical duress vis a vis,
a bowel movement,
wherein waste unable to expel
from the **** of this guy,
which bout with ****** obstruction
found me doubled over
with lower abdominal distress
whereby comfort found me unable to lie
down nor sit upright

(with back padded with pillows
against the cellar brick wall),
thus severe bloating a bonus well nigh
and managed on a previous occasion
to muster the means to bare
frigid arctic vortex aire to purchase
the Acme brand Metamucil,
which akin to Drano doth ply
thru the excretory tract
supposedly loosening the stools

which optimism (product
didst earn claim to fame)
generated a sigh
if that expressed intent
to cease LivingSocial would try
humph enjoining lxiii
year old married male
to cede victory to the grim reaper,
who would vie
as winner de jure

to this common fellow invoking libretto
ohm resistant understudy
waste not want not
allowing, enabling and providing relief,
without successful defecation
despite the oppressive urge
to bolster this Uriah
heep of balled up and tuckered out
five foot and ten inches of lovely bones,
thence mouthing retraction

of former thought to cease existing
though a non-bull lever
in any power broker qua mankind
relief at long last
provided posterior answered prayer
yet, this wordsmith
scrutinizes his recurring
pain in the *** jagged torture
and asks a rhetorical
one word question "WHY"?

Well now... monumental
poetic challenge recap,
I now craftily abbreviate
(think clogged toilet
synonymous with blockage)
waste matter after days did accumulate
regarding ****** blockage to alleviate
thus imagine impossible
airy mission to defecate
which debilitating scenario

(mine) frequent accursed fate
frequently recurring more often
as yours truly ages
i.e. latter day saint
Matthew Scott got older
****** affliction compromised me
ordinary easy going demeanor to boot
disallowing, disenabling, and not permitting
me - effecting, emulating, and exhaling
Tony the tiger's catchword grrrrrreat

if queried about my constitution
when alas... absolute ecstasy found me
expelling bowel movement with effort
weighing approximately 0.71428571 stone
though relieved, nevertheless
the toilet bowl clogged,
prompting me to correct historical records
on two accounts despite
causing potential ruckus
disaster buffs may incriminate
nsync notion huge bowel movement

(mine) took down (analogous
voyage to bottom of sea) toto Lusitania
and actually additionally
caused separate incident
complex edifice (think Titanic)
both sturdy ships of state
former rendered, lifted, foundered...
latter purportedly crashing
into iceberg invariably causing
rising sea levels courtesy
melting glacier (size of Florida) weight.
Bruce Frederick Joseph Springsteen
born at Monmouth Medical Center
in Long Branch, New Jersey,
on September 23, 1949.

His nationalities include hodgepodge
of Dutch, Irish, and Italian descent.

He grew up Catholic in Freehold, New Jersey.

I dedicate the following poem
to aforementioned musician,
whose figurative guitar finger
kept on the throbbing pulse
resoundingly reverberating
across American heartland.

this cautious man (bobby jean) born in the u.s.a.
grownin’ up in the badlands of atlantic city
bonded with blood brothers
felt born to run along backstreets
in brilliant disguise that did cover me
frequently blinded by the light
of the full moon
casting silhouettes against darkness
on the edge of town
which lunar shafts pierced candy’s room,
while immersed in book of dreams
describing better days on a Cadillac ranch
where devils & dust - visible dancing in the dark
celebrating like calendar showered 4th of july
or other glory days in darlington county
even though I ain’t got you.

livin’ in the future
mine hungry heart hankered
and felt like I’m on fire
for you, this fire in me craved human touch
desire - roaring into the ole factory fire
because I wanna marry you
because the night populated
with girls in their summer clothes
each dazzling like 57 channels (and nothin’ on)
in imagination of my american skin
descended from when adam raised a cain
before last to die forecasting kingdom of days
now dwelling in celestial mansion on the hill.

now rightfully claim status of I’m a rocker/
local hero and I’m goin’ down
meeting across the river
if I should fall behind
on the downbound train as living proof
within light of day magic jungleland
policed by highway patrolman i.e. johnny 99
alias johnny bye bye – held up without a gun
defending this lucky town
established on Matamoras banks
from an incident on 57th street
thus celebrated
as local hero every independence day
when, with ****** incorporated
firing point blank out in the street
that staccato new york city serenade
from no surrender outlaw pete
originally from nebraska.

it’s hard to be a saint in the city open all night
within my hometown
once my father’s house, now my city of ruins
where tis moot to ask
does this bus stop at 82nd street?

one step up
into the pink Cadillac
hops the ramrod queen of the supermarket
teasing audio dials sans radio nowhere
a red headed woman
racing in the street toward secret garden
to save my love –
with thee angel rosalita (come out tonight)
offering reason

to believe roll of the dice real world
and to prove it all night
from spare parts – shards of roulette wheel
housing souls of the departed
please save my love and stolen car
for sherry darling – that spirit in the night
she’s the one among souls of the departed
no longer stopped by state trooper
precinct based along streets of philadelphia
some crackling like streets of fire
straight time mandate
for those armed to the teeth
along tenth avenue freeze-out.

requiem per terry’s song – what love can do
accompanied by e street shuffle
performed in somber tones
rumbling down thunder road
for souls of used cars
two hearts crushed
along this hard land
for: the ghost of tom joad
the last carnival homage
to wild billy’s circus story
the price you pay when you’re alone
working on a dream
now wreck on the highway.

we take care of our own from youngstown
when heading of to the promised land
the rising distant mystical eden
where you can look,
(but you’d better not touch)
espying the river of salvation
joining eternally the ties that bind
a tunnel of love
or like the wrestler
pinning opponent tougher than the rest
like laborers working on the highway
chiseled like this hard land!
Temporarily revealed, (and muffled
     purported "mulish witch hunt")
     by meticulous Robert Mueller,
     whose punishing investigation
     re: garding Russian
     United States (2016) electioneering,
     a convincing report will weave
storied United States law enforcement

     and counterintelligence,
     a pre Thanksgiving surprise,
     "he" whipped out more'n one
     huge pinwheeling Jeff snow Flake
     from his huge
billowy cloud shaped sleeve,
while "other gods/goddesses
     on Mount Olympus,

     could only stare in
     jaw dropping envy,
     as "Blizzard King" strove
     to recoup lost ground,
     where "sky the limit"
maxim his to retrieve
with intent (and success),
     sans thought him

     "Duh Big Chill guy"
     tubby all bluster, swagger,
and "FAKE" trumpeter, peeve,
hush, (asper cold dead ringer
     of Polar Vortex fame),
     thus truthfully, modestly, and
     gleefully inconveniencing, humbling,
     and disabling large swath

of Mid Atlantic leave
ving coastal inhabitants
     dumbfounded
at literal "snow show," by Jeeve
turning early afternoon
     into somber greatful dead,
     where if one listened
     closely immortal souls

clearly didst unequivocally heave
November 15th, 2018
     to quaint currier and ives
into Adam picturesque Eve
did not deceive
which thick "curtain of white,"
many Earthlings desperately cleave
ving to one another,

     would not believe
meteorological phenomena pulled off
     without a hitch, anything
     but an April
     Fools Joke any mortal
     specifically named Matthew Scott
Harris could achieve.
Albeit cold shower with sudden zoo
ming onset of
brisk fallen temperatures
may not be amenable to you
dear reader, but after Matthew
sets to washing
creating substantial lather,

visited with healthy slew
of frothed shampooed hair do
(cuz - jest like
Spongebobsquarepants,
I like abundant suds),
which initial shock
     of cold water jolts mine
     body inducing "Whew"

to escape soaped over mouth
     (here, lemme lean in
     so yukon get a whiff)
     this self proscribed
     quasi (very diluted off the
     Peco boo grid) deprivation
     of hot H2O tolerance,
     qua minimal self

     elected survivalist
     modus operandi value
bull electric kool aid acid test
     undertaken in the
     event devastating adversity
     (mainly an electricity
     power outage) doth render
     livingsocial uncomfortably

     cold to the bone and sinew,
where mind over matter decides
     riches superfluous,
     especially if parvenu,
when scads of back up
     generators conk out
     total unbelievable wreckage,
     sans the overnight

     natural germane Blitzkrieg
     imposes savage apocalyptic
     devastating hellacious milieu
     (on account of a mega disaster
     such as hurricane Michael), who
doth not indiscriminate
     toward gentile or Jew
obliterating entire infra

     structure super glue
equalizing economic disparity hew
wing fair playing field reducing
     whether disposable wealth harkens
     from "old" money, and/or nouveau
riche, this sudden
     catastrophic event brew

till lee decrees indeterminate
     penury, and trappings
     of theoretical leisure class
     bon voyage every stitch of cloth,
and other material goods
     forcibly bade i.e. adieu.
Analogous to black box
holding untold secrets,
(after deadly plane crash
no survivors except
a journeyman foreigner),
I share the following self
introspection with ye dear readers,
which purported hidden truths
might set me free and clear,
albeit laborious effort

to loose constituent amalgamated
compound elements unmined
tantamount to agony
riddling psyche effort to extract
thorny matters incumbent upon me
analogously synonymous with
Androcles and the lion
think Roman mythology
whoops (Greek: Ἀνδροκλῆς,
alternatively spelled Androclus in Latin).

Oftimes methinks... whoami
spending scores of years
with frustrated sigh
hermetically sealing - waxed body electric
housing generic garden variety guy
as prepubescent severely, physically,
mentally emotionally tormented
contemplating, foregoing existence,
integrating, blithely urging wish to die
even at this moment,

still doth not reluctantly shy
away to embrace death wholeheartedly
simultaneously, naturally nor would I try
putting anonymous life (mine)
on the line, though...,
nevertheless envisioning rejoicing
(as told to significant other -
the missus naturally averse
to my demise well nigh)
without ability to explain why

per se if mortal ailment
truncated corporeal constituent
collective comprising mein kampf
Noel cowardly lie,
cuz becoming gratefully dead try
not to laugh while
yours truly cannot deny
permanent absence mine decoupling
from humanity, no longer linkedin
with consciousness, I recognize

hard skool of knocks alumni
soul finally free to roam spiritual realm
posthumously making his name sake
(synonymous with introvertedness)
deceased modest mortal hallowed human,
though the foregone feted occasion
beholds mine future
no longer entwined with the missus,
whence cessation as breathing being
decades into the future

whereby mine cremated ashes  
subsequently scattered across
reconstituted secluded terrain
once expanse of one hundred acre woodland
populated with poo poo ticky tacky,
about a half century ago
partitioned into cookie cutter
vinyl city occupying happy hunting grounds
witnessing abundant flora and fauna,
where Glen Elm estate

(an expansive demesne
formerly occupied by the Leipers) razed;
within corner abode
(at crossroads of Stoughton and Level Roads)
wherein dwelled Williams family
(offspring grown and senior citizens,  
the eldest daughter
happily residing in Carhibeg,
Rosscarberry county Cork Ireland)
to me, a garden variety generic guy
forsaken atrophied opportunity

loosed, whisked, and zapped...
toward sheltering sky
linkedin love never did transpire,
hence moot point absent wedding bells
did not require men to don black tie,
only selfish sexagenarian
mourns angst peppered soul,
whence death do me part
banshee will signify
all quiet on western front forever reunify
me with cosmic consciousness eternal ally.
While yours truly sat here
at the desk housing MacBook Pro,
pondering his next idée fixe apropos
for gamut of anonymous readers,
he unexpectedly, noisily and effectually
exploded out rear end;
perhaps ye heard or felt
the ground beneath your feet tremble;
the missus didst not stir in her sleep
yesterday (May 29th, 2023)
when my troubles
seemed so far away.

Jog me memory I did
with a little help figuratively
nabbed, pilfering, ransacking, et cetera
compilation of previously written poems
which involved scrolling thru
screen after screen of feeble attempts
to craft some stellar literary creation.

Worm I going with this line?

Just by a fluke,
I came across a scenario
where humorous embellishment
will (clear as water) diminish credence,
but slight fabrication will help revival
encompassing an outing with then girlfriend,
who eventually became the missus.

Upon the first date (mucho decades ago)
not quite two score
and three and a half years ago
with the gal, whose troth
aye did pledge allegiance to wed
(anniversary inching itsy bitsy
spider like up to
seven and twenty earth orbitz),
we agreed to dine
at an avante garde Tex-Mex eatery

in North Wales, Pennsylvania,
where angels feared to tread
carefully scrutinizing bon appétit
the menu selection,
a touch of Latin lick QED
all American version sans
south of the border cuisine –
Quod Erat Demonstrandum –
translations spit out
in rapid fire Hispanic

by a beady eyed
pierced and inked kid named Ned,
whose couture favored a punkish style
with spiky gelled green hair,
piercings galore and necklace
with a genetically modified
sizable entombed glassy pricey jewelry
encased insect in amber lead,
which beastly fully intact organism
with a miniature grizzly bear like head
momentarily hypnotizing me

pray tell, yours truly nudged himself
out of trance sans this egghead
who made a selection
by randomly landing finger
on an item feigning to be well bred
unbeknownst choice promised
concussive radioactive fallout
squelched with utmost difficulty
nearly impossible mission
to avoid loosing buttuck blast

if belched out the posterior;
**** would have catapulted,
delivered fatalistic deafening roar
wreaking havoc to life and limb
costing countless lives
regarding innocent restaurant patrons,
whose arbitrary choice
to partake of their repast
at aforementioned *****
unnamed restaurant analogous
ending with tragicomic farce.

After this Señor ingested
an ample number of mouthfuls
of beans and rice
that quelled most severe hunger pangs
mine lower gastrointestinal tract,
felt a bubbling and gurgling sensation
played through impropriety struggled
with gaseous mounting perturbations,
what promised to be hot malodorous,
would induce an air raid

from this “wind bag,”
(whose puckered, preserved, pickled, et cetera
and stinky namesake
occupies a place
at the Mutter Museum,
whose saving grace erroneously divine),
when wallet of suede discover herd
visa vis tubby devoid of cash,
thus convenient excuse to beat
the tirade of volcanic eruption
on the cusp of belching forth
found me bolting out the restaurant door
fortunately not waylaid

and madly dashing
(like some fiery comet dancer)
performing a cheeky number
hopping on one foot than the other –
since forceful blast triggered kidneys
to be tapped, thus prancer two step
extemporaneously incorporated
while awaiting available ATM
only to espy debit printout slip
inadequate funds available
zero balance in checking account.

While expulsion of noxious fumes
from thine sphincter courtesy  
brought relief as aye nonchalantly
prior to strolling inside cozy diner,
and slipped into me seat disinclined
to relate eave vents to future spouse,
the ****** aeration and stream of *****
(freed to water secluded copse)
from me magic flute which,
amazingly synchronized
with the Maximus glute
after consuming food
triggered ***** to toot.

Nevertheless, shortfall of legal tender
unfortunately and subsequently found
yours truly shackled,
impressed, forced, et cetera
as dishwashing galley slave
dashed mine coveted
bowed need for highstrung Cupid
annihilating, detonating,
hexing, et cetera
opportunistic spell
to don and trumpet myself
as artful dashing romancer.
(alternately titled: whipping and pommel ling
das soar addle brain)

My most recent deuce score
     plus three bajillion ban
an nah ram ma orbitz
squared bob sponge pants
     day of birth passed uneventfully –
     (round el sol) saw me dan
sing around one average star, which Evan
chilly wool worth hilly exhibit

     death throe tulle pan
dum mo' knee yum -
     becoming a black hole sun,
     when photon illumination
     totally tubularly blinks
     out more'n Knots Lan
ding all countries
     with exception of Japan

(if only for explicit purpose
     of this poem) can
did lee stated fan
silly free and foot loose
     to appease the ghost of Ivan
the Terrible, who would
     phish she shuss lee
     never fin hush his

     rage against the machine
     foaming at the mouth
asper gar non sequitur
     spoiler alert hint  
     aye made debut 13th of Jan)
and now for no rhyme,
     nor reason mention
     nothing (by the way)

     written thus far tan
gent shill to the square      
     of hide bound
Halliburton Hippopotamus,
     whose first name
     Horton doth move in clan

destine fashion, oh...and nope
     definitely not related
     to ancestors of Kublai Khan
whose nickname Lloyd
though, whoa, wow,
     and yikes quite a time span

'tween that Mongol
     consigning, conning, and condemning
     “FAKE” deplorable trump
     ping app Paul
     ling Peters to Azkaban
nonetheless, aye never aver
     witnessed no fanfare
     for this common (c'mon) man

lettuce high tail gangnam style to San
Mateo (matt er factly
     founded, settled, and
     populated by Scottish
     donning Harris tweed

a hop, skip and jump by van
from this yan
key dude dull who lives ian
Schwenksville, Pennsylvania.
Especially experiencing onset dehydration,
this opinion shared by former consumer,
he quaffed truckloads sugary and sports drinks
found mine once sculpted baby boomer body
undergoing gender reorientation, particularly
nondescript ******* incrementally found

busting (rivaling ******* bunny chest)
necessitated this garden variety
NON GMO gluten free husband
"papa," an endearment
addressed by the missus
puzzled when her

brassieres went missing
loathe to believe what sounded
like **** and bull story
embarrassed, yet finally
relented into pestiferous
inquisitiveness hen pecking wife,

she stood agape, after I dare bare
unclothed upper torso revealed
floppy, limp biscuit sagging
sorry excuse for *****
hence necessitating yours truly
to resort as partial crossdresser,

yet never foreseeing
anatomical morphology transforming
(analogous to mushroom popping up
following bucketloads of rain)
thus went cold turkey,
(as attested by this gobbledygook)

to swear off high caloric non nutritious
popular beverages
(generating bajillions dollars),
and additionally
forced non chipper infowar
i.e. internal three ring circuits

uncivil insurrection
(less than seven years ago)
as weeks elapsed months
(this unplanned resolution
dated early two thousand nineteen),

discarded over the shoulder boulder holder
in tandem with exercise
few times per week
plying twenty pound dumbbells
a pronounced reduction
saved me big bucks
undergoing cosmetic surgery!
A welcome reprieve
     against blistering hazy,
     hot and humid
     meteorological suffocating air
found me voluntarily
     hermetically sealing myself
     within a climate controlled
     one bedroom apartment

     this Schwenksville, Pennsylvania
     (actually originally Lake
     Woebegone) transplant
     getting acclimated to the
     summer weather in Zaire,
this country determined, sans
     while "blindfolded," directed,
     and guided while seated

     in my state of the art bedchair,
hence such chance decision,
     where yours truly,
     would spend the following year
gunslinging, fellow
     shipping, and engaging
     with bountiful mutineers
     while piloting corsair

outlandishly ludicrous, incredibly
     flimsy, and carelessly
     held together by wirehair
with an equally
     ratty motley crue
     forcing yours truly
     to "FAKE" being debonair,
this (Baritone Horn playing)

     privateer did veer
really did  mark hood
     lee did quickly
     twain tubby chief engineer
accomplishing (as
     resident poetic web stir)
     re: alias Muddy
     Waters ("Roger") unclear

breathing sigh of relief,
      I did not go over with
     my trademark mind boggling flair
to sow confusion
     within the mindscape
     of one or more readers
     will cause him/
     her to go thermonuclear

ready to choke, gas, or throttle me
     as he/she doth glare
intimidating such prediction analogously
     like Moby **** reacting violently
     when Cap'n Ahab ****** a spear!
Fruitless effort squeezing figurative juice
Pandora called triggering
helter skelter to get loose
necessitating Bullwinkle J. Moose
to usher at yours truly
(an aspiring wordsmith) vamoose!

Hey ****** ****** the cat and the fiddle
went off to see a crooked man and woman
whilst cowards jumped over moo-ving little
pair of mismatched
calf fully ambling muggles,
who both walked from scan
din navy yah,
(nor-way could action be stopped
otherwise den-mark would be left),
where dog goniff imps
jousted with brittle

shaky spears, den did mark
neither path to norse east, where pan
demon yum erupted over adult
playing monkey in the middle
and bear witness to such sport
as dishabille donned dude named Evan
spoon fully ladled insults adrip
with indignity of loosing - bubbling spittle
spluttering trumping monitor
to claim game rigged,

which assault whipped a ban
she against being accosted
from mish shuga,
a towering ebony Amazonian,
who didst tittle
late tad evincing groan nips quibbling
over what appeared to be a van
knit tee fair of bruising egos essentially
fighting for dominion
over right to urinate i.e. piddle
and defecate in non

gender specific restrooms wan
ever the urge
to empty the bladder or ****** -
(even if poo peas, the size of a skittle)
fraught major firestorm ratcheting,
synonymous with dandy rhyme
blues clues without reason -
dime a dozen cents less ditty -
snap, pop, and crackling
as hot cakes on a griddle.

Actually, the above
juiced a freaky Friday sideshow
displaying, hurraying, layawaying,
portraying and tracklaying dis-obeyed
rubric of respect, where decent
honorable linkedin maturity laid
waste to politesse, whar all stops pulled
sans presidential debates shade
no light on meaty issues,
but mudslinging as faux hit parade
housing and trumpeting an offer

to make America Great Again
thru yelping vanguard,
uber up lyft promulgating,
and intimating 4 years
times 52 long weeknd rock'm sock'm
bash re: hollow wean
qua vamp pyre avast
state farm riotous quacking,
whence life, liberty
and the pursuit of happiness decayed

into growling pedigreed mishmash made
for kickstarter bullied
prize **** fighters
indeed jimmying stockade
bag of tricks viz contesting scalawags,
tearing like rabid animals inlaid
with bared teeth,
and mouth frothing foam,
who just barely evade
coming to fisticuffs,

while presenting scathing hair-raid
nada so hill a re: us political pugilists
making up rules on shutterfly
spotify, and not afraid
toot change horses in midstream
to fix outcome of game
of thrones spouting
unfair sands casino trade
thus, billy-clubbing husband
of opponent indulged

in many a rapacious escapade
smear tactics and mistruths
essentially, he sung hiz zone
battle hymn of republican party,
a mockery and charade
driving donnybrook conspiratorial
billed Jefferson muttering arcade
guarded by ensconced
male and female Petsmart Weimaraner,
attired in a Thom malt chew wuss
Nast tee getup

elephant and donkey costumes respectively
while viewers entertained,
who succeeds as next blade
runner, and earn chance
to run country into the ground,
then a fancy feast for morticians,
one world wide webbed graveyard
moss lee tubby
taken back by Mother Nature,
thee indomitable ace of *****.
(originally composed approximately a half
dozen plus years since this revision now,
September 13th 2018 ~ 12:48 ante meridiem,
which missive, I came across scrolling down
volatile Memory Lane.)

As my recent blank day of birth
passed by unevent
     fully for this Earth
ling (one week ago this Friday,
     with another love handle
     round my abdominal girth
nostalgia and reminiscence
     for childhood (now...

     razed from sprawling roof
     home and hearth
days of yore
     (in modest mansion
     memorialized with sentimental mirth
dwelling only situated
     in mind's eye
     of this author's reduced

     to fading words-worth...
324 Level road
     Collegeville, Pennsylvania abode
gone with the wind
     faint feeble foray
     attempted with poetic code  
spurred this dim
     ming reflection soon...

     near to come decades
     will totally erode
reminiscence whar flowed
nebulously gauzy, fuzzy,
     and blurry cerebral blot, asper
     a Harris family emotional
     and spiritual sanctuary,
     (and mecca), that once glowed

with plenti good crackling cheer,
     a household load
did with cavorting cameraderie,
     and social IP
     (inter personal) node
where conviviality, gaity,
     levity, et cetera slowed
time to standstill, that irretrievable,

     where froggy all toad
went a court'n
     on golden fish pond...
not quite storybook
     past zipped faster
     with each subsequent year
seems to fly at instagram,
     snapchat, and shutterfly vear

really speed of light,
hence I decided to air
sentimental well a wear
how such compressed images
     a veritable splotch tear
drop shaped (pardon me
     asthma myopic eyes
     wax nostalgic, viz moisten stare

into metaphorical crucible where
Boyce and Harriet (the
     latter deceased) both did rear
myself and deux
     darling sisters (a prayer
could deliver,
     no greater loving siblings –
     all three of us near

approximately close in age, ah mere...
ah such thoughts
     doth wince the psyche
     of this frankly earnest,
     modest smart Alick
     of me (just another brick)
now this blurb on
     many a virtual wall

     with just a mouse click
away for any to read,
     and comment with sleight flick
of wrist if the mood
     evokes any reaction.
Xxvi+ marriage  anniversary (mine)
recalls first disastrous
date with future missus
approximately waltzing
matt tilde two dozen
plus years ago

Tex Mex Connection
201 E Walnut Street
North Wales, Pennsylvania, 19454
every entree included beans
maybe refried or otherwise

effectively laid siege
mine delicate constitution
quickly felt bloated
ready to explode
ala Hindenburg Airship

rushed out restaurant
like bat out of hell
twofold purpose accomplished
desperately needed
to eliminate gaseous buildup

airing banal courtesy
yours truly as kapellmeister
aired rendition, viz Die Fledermaus
for sphincter muscle
hence, faster than Usain Bolt

dashed out front door
plus needed to tap MAC
inadequate wallet stash cash
thus, aye hightailed to nearest ATM,
or rather courtesy ****** explosion

blasted lovely gaseous body
analogously, effectively, gravity free
whizzing, whirring, whining balloon
a bit far afield
incidental bank woe

gastrointestinal directive resolved
forced effort taxed derriere
all told alight propulsion
natural gas fueled
lovely bones within flash

far surpassing long held
Guinness Book world's record
******* the ripper former
flatulence champion claimed,
nonetheless I safely landed far

from madding crowd
analogous pulling pin
out hand grenade
gluteus maximus burnt to crisp
necessitated immediate diversion

local drug store
purchased preparation H
discreetly patted, palmed, pacified
scorched cheeky ***
suffered first-degree burns

hemorrhoid cream balm
alleviated buttuck blasts fallout
quickly reunited with my gal
slightly concerned about whereabouts
related personal anecdote

tuckus thru remains of
otherwise humdrum hours
concluding asinine antics,
where approximately

half past monkey's ***
driving lass back home
found me exerting effort suppressing
recurring rumblies in domain tumbly.

Posterior script:
the above account
unsolicited plug for satisfied patron
asper jumpstarting behind the times
buttuck blaster beastie boy.
180 · Mar 2019
Irreverent Hotheaded Grinch
(Any resemblance between said title,
as told tummy by ya finch,
and commander in chief,...
not accidental, nor a cinch
buttock hum posed on behalf

of these bottom ming out
fifty states, plus Puerto Rico inch
ching, donning, and clamoring
desperately for fluffin ***** pinch)
hitter to aright "FAKE"

government even a cameo by David Lynch,
would pilot ship of state with nary a flinch
bucking creative enterprise winch
cha ya know
as writ by this average Joe

brainstorms offbeat ideas
caw king like a black crow
boot probably relegated
to same fate as dodo
bird long extinct,

asper could also be woe
full destiny of this poe
whit (wannabe), plus aspirant
aiming, mulling, vying,
et cetera tubby
next presidential bozo

and thwart further ruses to hoodwink
by subterfuge, treachery, unethical...brink
man ship, Capital One citizen bankers
to re: captcha how to MAGA,
and avoid pitching country

slipping into behavioral sink,
which White House bumstead "FAKE"
golden blond dee antics even entice pink
panther to **** sitter entering 2020 elections
amidst what promises tubby hang nail biting,

knuckle cracking, hair pulling - each kink
Putin on brakes against
collusion, sans frightful - link
king voter bribery, disenfranchisement, fraud...

calling joint efforts of Captain Nemo,
Captain Kangaroo, Captain America...ink
kin, a pact (minus any imp) potent fink
power hungry, money grubbing, apprenticed
tan hatt man spinning wheel of misfortune

beady barren eyes that never blink
immodest, impertinent, impudent,
et cetera hyperlink
to flesh eating, debauchery,
bacchanalian web pages
kickstarting naked lunch high jink.
This self anointed,
     deluded, glorified aye
man master ba...
     ba...baiter by
sharing his muttering
     dogma hoops chai
Guru Dev to see
     reactions viewing dia

metric lee apposite
     stance of mine to Eli
ten divert precepts gleanined
     from this small fry,
(a secular humanist) this guy
welcomes reactions hie
hastened, viz occipal organs, I
bet sparked visually intrigued an

emotion perhaps vehemently can
not stand disparate
     atheist modality fan
sing their creed steeped Han
dully irreproachable immediately jan
gling with internal repugnance
     opposing as out lan
dish any non parochial

     bull leaf man
dating evolutionary
     tenets as abominable
     toward impious heresy
     impugning a pan
thee on of
     Doubting Thomas decrying
     “FAKE” ******* up tree men

     Das Creator, who essentially
     in this beastie
     boy mind pure ran
dum ness to cosmic
     phenomena yes, tan
tum mount to
     heretical (not tomb
     any generations gone by –
     way before Western Civilization
     predominate the capitalistic
     paradigm, an on
     set of mass urban
iz aye shu, who...blindly pre sip
     poe zed, an esse

     hen shul divine Van
Halen superstar deity
     unconditionally – wan
     ton lee selfless,
     nameless highness faultless
huss scent shawl lee
     dons role of passive ace
of spaces, heart of darkness

     diamonds eminent grise brace
sing mankind, whose
     docent spout morals
     from their sanctified dais
scorning the strong
     temptations that entice
snd the virtue
     endowed agaist surrendering

into the pitfalls of vice.          
No (bow wow byte) intent
     to postulate any absurd
claims, whereby
     a flock of seagulls
     among the mass
     at least one angry bird
perhaps **** sitter ring

     me in the whey
of some global
     proselytizing ambition ankh curd
in millenniums of
     devout where religious
     flavor of the era
     atempted to en gird
the spare scattered

     clusters of humanity
     whereby an un
     learened mortal heard
a “voice, ” no doubt
     this supposed “chosen”
     one so inured
to dirt poor existence,
     which visualization didst appear

attributed to utter
     exhaustion fatigued body clear
ready to collapse,
     when the e'er
the mind mind
     plays tricks gear
ring tubby the laughingstock.
Lodged squarely upon corporeal property
(i.e. necessary soft tissue)
of Amelie Beth Harris-McGeehan
mine eldest sister,
when medical technician informed
aforementioned unpleasant tidings
earlier today February 25th.

Utmost grievousness grips
analogous to invisible
strong hands strangulating
"I can't breathe"
while grappling trying to process
apocalyptic forebodings
(impinging on mine corporeal
fifty plus shades of gray matter).

Impossible mission
(insync with absent impetus),
thus renders feeble attempt
crafting poem,
yet unbridled (hyperbole
employed to accentuate emotion)
regarding brotherly love
upon being informed
most unpleasant tidings.

Laughter and sunshine
eradicated in one fell swoop
absolute zero peace of mind
until fortune teller
peers into crystal ball
and invokes divine intervention

whereby life, liberty
and pursuit of happiness
buffets thee along
countless additional Earth orbits
around the sun
granted second lease on life.

Auspicious signs of
early birds taking wing
(in an effort to feast
upon diet of worms)
to celebrate advent of Spring
will be uber twittering
glad tidings of your
clean bill of health
ditto chattering squirrels
buzzfeeding unearthed

soil, mushrooms
and animal bones,
while yours truly delights
reading within partially secluded
outside triangulated nook,
(a favorite alcove of mine)
to bask under sheltering sky
feeling restoration of vitality
courtesy Herculean strength
of Mister Sun's powerful solar rays.

PostScript: my humblest apology
if word first choice constituting title
caused undue agitation,
cuz only genuine expression
courtesy unwavering optimism
insync with sixth sense intended
to trumpet Taj Mahal high hope
buoying your body,
mind, and spirit triage.
Sic semper tyrannis ad mortem
("Thus always I bring death to tyrants").

Ever since early forerunners
of twenty first century
mankind (sprinted
across trackless expanse extant
upon planet Earth),
modern **** Sapiens essentially
won out as coterie precursors
sans predominant
present day team of rivals.

The zigzag line,
whence our arboreal ancestors
skedaddled their way
toward capital one delineation
of diehard deadheads
******* disaster, and acquiring
dubious distinction
decreeing domain of oblate spheroid
as prime real estate,
(when Prometheus fire privy to proto
humans), the imperceptible
figurative ink did not dry
before hairy hooligans
edged out other prehensile primates.

Enfant Terrible employed
as an analogy for punctuated
equilibrium witnessing
boom rang amidst feral creatures
unpredictably crowing
with nirvana seeking
foo fighting fecundity
(inadvertently in sync
with Feng Shui)
to launch scrappy
posse of measly mensch
kinsmen/women into the realm.

This phenomena countless
thousands of years since
inception of brutal, nasty
and short present day troglodytes.
With the aid
of an imaginary crystal ball,
the seeds of White Lily got borne
via Aery windy gusts jet setting
most “advanced” pygmy beasts
as animalistic bellwether
per future adventure,
whence many anthropological
opposable thumbed volumes
yet written till present
deadly crossroads
announced ruthless Reichstag.

Credos, codas, diktats
governing infantile Messerschmitt
Sol Invictus yet unnamed role
as most dangerous living
beings known to exist
unwittingly usurped grandiose
nom de plume as Master
predicating their survival on
brawn and brains
to public enemy number one
to all other life forms.

As the fittest (at least
when accident found tendency
to crowdsource),
the mob mentality already evident as
hyena cackles quickly garnered
rubric of might equals
right), thus grabbing
by force of strong arms (fingers
clutching deadly lances)
top prize as sovereign
dictators of the Proletariat).

Over the course of millennia,
they became de
facto dominant species.

The evolutionary descendents
metamorphosed into bipedal hominids
of recent mankind did not monkey
around when competing in the Human Race.

They elbowed, jostled,
and ousted competitors eventually
to ascend inexorably their way
to top tier of totalitarianism.

Great indomitable naked apes
of early simian evolution,
would not settle for any role
except top banana in
hierarchical schema
of biota extant throughout nascent
dawn of civilization.

Violence with whatever
material at hand vanquished any
threat to world wide webbed *******
sans existence at dawn of civilization.

Closer to late morning
and high noon tall tale ushered
vanity viz venal, vicious,
vocal Tarzans, 10,000 Maniacs,
and voodoo worshippers
blitzed like banshees.

Literal face saving
each manikin for himself
(gnome hatter
whether blood pact swore)
bludgeoned, hoodwinked,
and whipped warriors wary warlocks
fought tooth nail to death.

One instant found a bald
(ah that explains receding heir line)
bandied legged ******* macho tree
swinging sportsman
brazenly boasting bona fide.

Well guess what ma friend?

That sure-footed
geico hunter met ****** death
on an empty stomach
without the aid
of fast food restaurants.

His purported blood brothers abandoned him
(at dropped née hurled clump of offal)
as dependent and reliable brethren.

No such thing
as gentlemen’s agreement ruled ******
terra firmae.

Amidst warren of primates,
a promise quickly broached
instantaneously after pledging allegiance
to a pseudo fraternity.
171 E Swedesford Rd,

Unexpected positive experience
with regular totally tubular
gnarly patron first name Maureen
hmm... if only this burbling blurb
blog could somehow
be communicated - pro bono, cuz green
legal tender (mine) scarce -
anyway earlier

today December sixteenth
two thousand and nineteen
ah, my dog how serendipitously
I did germanely, modestly,
quintessentially shepherd convenient
rhyme with reason (hubble spontaneity)
three, five, eight, plus
this line thirteen...

(you get the idea, si?)
with eyes shut tight e'en
absentmindedly maneuvering "fake"
steering wheel, while zee queen
(think four foot eleven
spouse wearing spongebob

pajama pants) profusely thanked
police seeing eye dog approaching
and barking unforeseen
drove sitting on his haunches
on driver seat cop cruiser
smack dab nabbit
on our figurative docked toured tail

emulating crash test dummy
nearly didst almost careen
into our two thousand
and nine Hyundai Sonata
gave spouse faux paw high five
while flock of seagulls,
eagles, black crows...,

attired with red and green
holiday outfits suddenly appeared clean
(white hove out blizzard)
out of thin air nearly collided
with our self driving
automobile I amazingly
gratefully dodged tween
twenty plus miles north east

back to Schwenksville,
Pennsylvania, where this mean,
(once lean twice shy)
poetry (aye sup prose) writing machine,
now exuberant poet hoping
to garner (no bull lariat) keen
punny hush meant toward anybody

including trumpeting mujahedeen
hoot aches objection, which
courtesy self typing keyboard really
cool and groovy power
(smart thinkpad) reads my mind
pressing corresponding key visible
on Lenovo external large screen.
Rigor mortis cold comfort
defendant need not appear in court
diminishes attendant prosecutorial effort
habeas corpus made superfluous
courtesy just dessert morte
but deadman outflanked plaintiffs sport.

Nonetheless millionaire financier and
accused *** trafficker
found dead by suicide
on Saturday August 10th, 2019
doth not absolve his guilt
rather speaks of innocence
and naiveté he stole.

Many accosted victims might rejoice,
yet the ghost of Jeffrey Epstein
will continue to hang around,
grinning, leering, ogling...
within seared psyches
indelibly scarred
only slightly assuaged

wounded warrioresses
advocates against physical violation
****** and/or otherwise
offenders need be taken to task,
whether within parental/
guardian role, religious contexts
relationships, random
axe of violence, et cetera.

The voices of abused victims
sweeping across webbed gamut of
age, gender, nationality, race, religion...
suffer anguish courtesy
***** deeds dirt cheap
costing devastating expense
for grueling life

only compounded when
blithely ignored
begetting psychological ills
giving perpetrator,
no matter his/her (their)
linkedin demographic bracketed affiliation

must be held accountable
yes even the president
plus lesser political representatives
granting guilty free license
to roam scott free.

Yours truly amply nonresistant
regarding ohm my dog
being convenient scapegoat,
reckons if brazen
and empowered courtesy
Lake Woebegone powdermilk biscuits
retaliatory vendettas bring absolute zero
win/win conflict resolution.
with natural binaural and visual ambience...
courtesy bumblebee pollinating clover

Diaphanous wings yield live airplay
vibrations undulate thru ethereal airway
rippling glorious edifications allay
gorgeous fauna and floral array
ears and eyes beheld
awesome buzzfeeding display
flight of the bumblebee laden with pollen
analogous to elegant performance
starring Faye Dunaway.

Crossword puzzle momentarily
distracted by amazing fete
observing crucial insect necessary
transferring pollen to pistils of flowers
with each subsequent visit
impossible mission to differentiate
one amongst countless
gently rumbling Bombus.

June 14th, 2020 thoughts
of doomsday far and away
pitch perfect afternoon yippie yie yay
I could squander hours
observing miracle worker relay
unwittingly alighting then planting pollen,
i.e. the male gametophyte
(DNA) of seed plants
transported to female part of flower
to enable plant to reproduce.

Quintessential lesson relearned
live life foreplay
until... hair turns
more'n fifty shades of gray
pronouncedly more noticeable since salons
and barbershops under lockdown
onset of coronavirus
(COVID-19) spells hooray
satisfying grim reaper

until vaccine acquired
meanwhile (back at the ranch)
think laboratory smart people linkedin,
qua advocating preventive measures,
a fancy word for test
iz pseudo synonym immunoassay
whispered to yours truly courtesy
twittering and tweeting blue jay.

How uncomplicated existence
allotted to birds and bees
simple straight forward purpose
additionally as by-product
to cultivate cheese

just cut away any moldy part
lest thee exhibit symptoms
synonymous contracting poison
(less painful than scorpion sting),
nevertheless nsync with illness
expanding thru body

on par with generic
garden variety archetype disease
ah, I sure wish being human
constituted less cumbersome complication
instead comprised
supercalifragilisticexpialidocious ease
as iterated with aforementioned

half dozen simple life forms
some of which can survive extreme temperatures
and/or even suffering thru a deep freeze
now upon reaching the end,
I expect nothing more emphatic
than ye to ******* Geez!
Saint Patrick's Day, or
Feast of Saint Patrick
Lá Fhéile Pádraig
invoke even non Irish to proclaim
Éirinn go Brách
translated as "Ireland Forever."

Juiced tin he nuff tame afore
thee 2021 Saint Patrick's Day,
(hens this faux written accent
donned to sail hub berate won big todo
fur those peep pull o' Eire rush deuce cent)

aye pretend, and thence make oop
duff fallow wing vary minor event
harkening back e'er sins this generic gent,
hooped tubby imp poet hint wannabe,
(who hapt tubby absent

without leave from Brogue kin home
since a lil whippersnapper, and accident
boot tappin), when me note holler than
garden variety leprechaun, advertisement
tuff hind miss elf, no major ailment -

good red ants tomb ma late mum,
which fair re: creatures, no argument
booth us, iz moar rare than
finding far leaf clover,
and eek will coz fur astonishment

eef hoodlum (caw zing
bedlam) sought atonement
Yukon bull heave or no,
how life on the lamb
as a Dublin street urchin met belligerent

scruffy geezers old looking and bent
till kind ole soul named C. Clement
took yaws truly as apprenticed
Baron without complaint,
though kept ma lidded concealment

secret til search abandoned confident
gnome hissing pipsqueak,
would be sorely missed
giving fresh start with help to coinvent
patois, and be comb real estate magnet

ne'er no wing want oof
basic needs - yea content
in due time making pile
moan hee tall as Taj Mahal
kicking back during Lent

gerrymandering convalescent
old age spinning yarns
for modest copayment
total tubular tales with
nary a Harris Boss Tweed stitch of truth!
Already noticeably marked
increase in daylight
yours truly courtesy affected
qua heliotropic phenomenon
finds me noggin gently being tugged
upward and westward ** toward sun
after dark mine talking head
rests downward and eastward.

Soon very indistinct
environmental intimations
regarding onomatopoeic
ubiquitous murmurings,
whereby old man winter
ever so faintly
relinquishes, loosens, forsakes...
Judas Priest iron maiden grip
upon emergent biosphere
suddenly awakened when
Mother Earth generates

invisible signals transmitted
across world wide web
analogous to conductor
standing on podium
with baton in her/his hand
orchestra playing on cue
perhaps choice selection
Rite of Spring
work by Russian composer Igor Stravinsky
or Flight of the Bumblebee
written by Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov.

Soon dormant species will exhibit rebirth
out their linkedin hibernation
flora and fauna tentatively
begin to issue forth out their slumbers
shoots poke thru across terra firma
insync with twittering tweeting creatures
hint viz verdant and/or fecund potential
ready to burst forth and proliferate
instinctively trumpeting joie de vivre.

Sensational show stopping, eye catching
breathtaking... parade of sights and sounds
await buzzfeeding eyes and ears
about six weeks hence,
within mine home box office
here at Highland Manor apartments
quite affordable rent
allows, enables and provides
radiant quiescence, preponderant observance,
nonresistant magnificence, jubilant innocence,
exuberant deliverance,
concurrent buoyant abundance.

Accordingly and allegedly other than
meteorologists plenti schooled
ascertaining onset of temperate air
more particularly otter den non humans
unassumingly (ferreted out), who bear
the tidings, when that season

of rebirth dawns with crystal clear
blue skies, and terrain where deer
and antelope eagerly play without despair
purportedly realized, reassured, recounted...drear
re: days vamoosed foretold by
Punxsutawney Phil on Groundhog Day

February second - requires one
with acute hearing to ****, and ear
turnips tickling the nose nostrils
delicate hairs (instagram ideal outlook) subtly,
markedly, lively..., yet gently flair
soon harkening shrieks

of delightful analogous funfair
no stranger to Renaissance Faire
of pitch perfect gamesomeness
will seem as... otherworldly pleasant
ah heaven sent giftware,
where all creatures great and small

sing psalms, upon arrival when hardware
trappings of winter shucked witnessing
unrolled welcome Scottish mat so hare
and tortoise can race,
cuz vernal equinox, sports a linkedin
improvisational, ebulliently

educational, cerebral, audiological...
twittering melange I will hear,
and grateful no defect doth impair
ability to revel silence, slake, soak...
insatiable thirst even prodding junketeer,
panhandler, vendor...
the last named,
perhaps selling kitchenware
knicknacks, keepsakes...
to hippies (think yours truly)
with long wavy hair
interwoven with Kahila
Garden Lily, Laurel, Maidenhair...
profusion of sensual delight
brings Mother Earth near,
the body, mind, and soul

espying frolicsome **** sapiens
donned with minimal outerwear
infusing all living things
common native plants and animals
in conjunction with resident outlier
particularly those pining
to answer call of the wild overdare
ring and bee zee lee court'n prepare

ring to beget young as
singular requisite quintessential profiteer
fluttering, instagramming emoji,
sans shutterfly puppeteer
as audience visually already reddit
regarding acting entire scenes,

viz Biblical Genesis answering prayer
particularly if gnostic, heterodox, queer...,
finally relieved, sans polar vortex
albeit somewhat rare
atmospheric phenomena, how ideal
if said rabid Jack Frost

would sink icy bite - part
and parcel green gang
at much more favorably time reappear
during oppressive heat spell during
sweltering triple digits temperature
summer re: time of year.
FROM BIKINI BOTTOM TIMES...

...Spongebob Squarepants...what...atoll...?
plunged into where,...no way...toilet bowl...
supposedly, when the ghostly hand ex-toll
ling praise from his late creator, and master

meow mind of popular Stephen Hillenburg
cast said main character in clean new role,
an unexpected greasy, grimy, grisly, grouchy,
grungy gruff peagreen ******* ***** troll

snatched the unsuspecting
cheerful happy go lucky
animated fellow, who lives
in a pineapple under sea

(at 124 Conch Street) quite
self absorbed with Gary
his pet snail (not answering
questions at this time), we

understand emotional devastation,...
and possibly got flushed....sniffling
and sobbing heard...discontinuation,
this could wreak something
offal to all those avid landlubber

fans (many grownups) cling
to cautious optimism, but accept
vigilant prayers believing
quirk of fate could turn tide
of events & cannot dismiss linking

Russian collusion with attendant
rogues gallery, nor abandoning
any in house political conspiracy,
where top Navy brass calling
attention to an uncommonly

unusual migrant barnacles casing
with doddering fogey "Watergate
Plumbers" in tow absconding
before they could be apprehended
(hmm... something seems fishy)

haint no logical explanation, why
anyone would seek squeeze zing
the porous life out of such a
lovable...how unsinkable... accosting
...argh das **** and span hubble...

such a congenial, gentle, likable...
made himself come to life, (and
make believe to fans) achieving
he really existed, when birthed
from figment of imagination aching

tub be accepted and loved (by other
than Mister Rogers) acquiring
water world renown purportedly
slated to receive Krusty Krab shape
formica plaque engraved with his

name inlaid with finest enameling,
meanwhile...stay tuned at amazing
undrying resiliency as saturated media
updates how beloved soaking  
hero does wetter adversity!
the warning words website not secure
nearly left writer of these words **** poor.

usually linkedin with ******* websites
lest ye find yourself in the maws of hackers.

generalization utilized to communicate actual
online experience that occurred Wednesday
(August 24th, 2022), while i unwittingly in
the shower lathering up my hair, which inter
lude of relaxation interrupted when the missus
shouted out serious message identification.

yours truly paid steep price courtesy the wife
who ventured forth into seedy webbed world
she zealously, nonchalantly, blithely ventured
into steamy underbelly of fetid depraved beast.

to unlock access to Macbook Pro i grudgingly,
depressingly, angrily forked over five hundred
ninety eight dollars and ninety nine cents pronto
courtesy PayPal to purported vendor/merchant
named Support Desk, which supposed technician
asked me to relinquish control of said laptop in
order to troubleshoot alarming situation regard
ding motley crew jump/kick starting getting my
precious data specifically and most importantly
including banking information allowing, enabling

and providing nasty and brutish cyberpunks to
siphon every last cent painstakingly acquired by
slew of empathetic professional psychological
helpmates (such as george adams, jean dole, elba
dorley, gabe pinkski, paul sacks), who vouchsafed
crippling anxiety afflicted me, which agreed upon
diagnosis schizoid personality disorder qualified
yours truly to receive social security disability, a
dog send to allow, enable, and provide unearned
income to help meet basic costs of livingsocial.

fortunately i did not need to establish gofundme
site, cuz wise mind within mine noggin suspected
unsavory shenanigans after speaking (with con-
siderable agitation) over the telephone with deux
(not good) fellas compounded by language barrier,
who brazenly wrested remote control of aforesaid
computer (courtesy ramping up fear factor) wrought
by unforgiving hackers would wantonly wreak havoc
with mein kampf destroying financial security nsync

ruining OpenOffice poetry and prose documents, and
even though worst case scenario avoided thus far, an
uneasy feeling grips every fiber of mine corporeal,
emotional, and spiritual being, cuz instinctive sixth
sense came to the rescue and touché Matthew Harris
for filing a claim with Citizens bank after above stated
dollar figure posted nipping in bud potential fraudulent
cyber scheme, which one aging long haired pencil
necked geek naive nattering nerdy nabob of negativism
nearly got hoodwinked.
Meaning the corporeal complex edifice
housing these lovely bones,
where linkedin logorrhea ably
strives to break out
in meaningless song
yobble hum hum ****** dee dee
and dance courtesy
an unexpected burst of energy
helped fashion a second rate poem
heaving up from deep within the key
of Matthew Scott's ideas – née
Harriet and Ozzie
stereotypical 1950's family prithee
i.e. unexpectedly manifesting que
cull lee coalescing, butta not three
endeavors crafted since quota we
kind to exhaust passion before zee...

land revisited, when
a call for shot eye
guarantees, a plethora of ideas
wordlessly will take flight
into the cerebral realm will fly
necessitating exertion from this guy
will necessitate me to type
briskly before hie....
forget what dreams are made
when supine I restfully lie
otherwise once fully awake
I would be forced to pry
remembrance of things past
from the night before trying
to scour subconscious
with plentitude, whereby

ah...whew...just when
I felt at a loss what to write...
bitta bing bitta bang
(optional chitty at no extra cost),
lo and behold ear splitting,
appalling sounds did invite
until dusk hands clapped
over each ear tight
to muffle noise pollution spite
fully generated by
rambunctious youths,
who know no right
that rosily gunning engines quite
obnoxious, and that conviction
edited (by me) tubby polite
buffer this chap hunkers
down for the night
after switching off the end table light.

The following constitutes the e-man
soup pay wanton declaration
emphatically, independently,
and obnoxiously
transmitted thru ether
these loathsome roar of dirt bikes
punctuates the formerly quiet air
where local high school
teenage mutant ninja
male turtles blare
(an educated presumption)
at top notch threshold decibel
definitely inducing deafness,
which will soon be clear
to those motorheads
flooring accelerator scaring deer
and other sparse wildlife,
whose engines I hear
miles away, cuz this bard ****
got extreme (ear river rent)
hypersensitivity to sound
perhaps linkedin
tummy predisposition,
could allow ma

self to expound,
whereby scrawling how painful
eye experience,
where 21st century
urban jungle doth abound
to exacerbate anxiety and panic,
aye noticed round
about puberty, and plugged up ears
to dull the nerve wrack
king Breitbart cacophony
even family pet
dogs (part Border
Collie and Hell Hound)
barked with shrill torturous yap,
which reverberation did
assault and pound
analogous to round after round
of ammunition being fired
making an audible sound
within mine delicate constitution
evidenced by lower gastrointestinal bubbling,
churning, and gurgling
kickstarting what feels
analogous to molten lava
rumbling from ore face leading
within mine leadened belly.

Presenting written access to
excellent outlook powerfully pointing
to the Inferno as Divine Comedy
by Dante Alighieri
and also a best seller titled fiction
written by author Dan Brown.

Within underworld vastness
Beelzebub, formerly known
as either Triel, or Yophiel,
a former Seraph turned
high-ranking demon,  
considered one of the Seven
Princes of Hell and oversees
the Order of the Fly.

He, alongside Satan and Lucifer,
forms the triumvirate of Hell
and  one of the supreme
monarchs of the Inferno.

Audiological ***** of mine
impossible to avoid unwillingly
being part of loud
buoys George culture club
emanations impossible to dub,
thus helplessly bombarded, exposed,
and subjected to discordant
damaging noise found
yours truly to flub
attendant tasks, especially grub
bing to earn chump change
to avoid mingling at social hub
rather remain hermetically
sealed, where nub
body cant see me, hence
that concludes thine literary rub
a dub dub with three men in a tub.
hovers over 100 seconds to midnight
as of January 2022,
which apocalyptic prognostication
established by the Bulletin
of Atomic Scientists
maintained since 1947,
the clock quantifies a metaphor
for threats to humanity
from unchecked scientific
and technological advances.

Very thin sliver of time remains
before zero hour realized,
but countless heroic measures attainable
prior to Doomsday Clock striking midnight
(witnessing global annihilation unleashed
courtesy malevolent forces
wrought by egregious
ingenious narcissistic mankind),
whereby civilization inextricably linkedin
ominous quaking storied unsettling webbed
wide world harbingers  
vitiated by weapons of mass destruction

loom ever closer unless
**** sapiens can unite,
whereby at least one obscure Yiddish word
Ongematert (tired out,
albeit psychologically wracked)
will render nuclear stockpile superfluous
(the idealist trumpets long live
The Naked Ape a 1967 book
by English zoologist
and ethologist Desmond Morris  
chronicling humans as species)
proving supremacy of virtue

versus nipping in bud everyone
wishing their kith and kin  
final fare thee well upon
debacle potentially fateful genocide
describing, horrifying, liberating Gaia
of peopled pestilential maelstrom,
(hence purchase front row tickets now)
visible clear across thee solar system,
which could theoretically occur tonight
before betokening apocalyptic sight
'course one must go about
her/his business – right?

Rhetorical question troubles
existential nihilist (me)
how to shrug off monstrous plight
(ghastly hellacious towering
mushroom cloud infernos)
analogous to punishment allotted Atlas
re: to hold up earth
on his shoulders for all eternity
at last count oblate spheroid
weighing a whopping 13 thousand,

170 billion trillion pounds,
or 13,170,000,000,000,000,000,000,000
impossible mission quite
challenging, where one
brother grimm ponders plight,
when with instantaneously "****"
jump/kick starts irrevocable dissolution
of fledgling acquaintanceships
and long established friendships
within eye blink

(think snapped fingers) outright
regardless, whether...
perchance we ever
cross paths long daze
journey into night,
and met under virtual reality moonlight
ah... methinks the mere awareness
of poetess transient existence
metaphorically found modest, mercurial
mellow male within limelight

oy vey admittedly one
rusty Ongepatshket knight
fumbling in the dark with
his unreliable sputtering jacklight
hooping aforesaid gal, whose eyes alight
upon mine genuine words doth newt
**** sitter me laughable, nor impolite,
yet accept hard virtual reality to highlight
and/or _ underscore delight
full dame online - each of us,

an infinitesimal jot of granulite
within vast cosmos given finite
minuscule time to excite
our senses trending utmost delight
during brief unique
deoxynucleic chromosomal copyright
til death do us part,
whether natural demise
doomed to huge sinister clouds
speeding, spelling, spewing radioactive blight.

Uneasiness far greater
to confront atomic augury
than pernicious penury
which ceases within eyeblink
certainly far more serious than perjury,
(which yours truly never guilty),
nevertheless afflicting me
with psychological injury.

Personal finances pitted
me deep in hock
into red zone, yes
quite a shock,
to absorb - now finds yours
truly poorest oldest
curmudgeon goofy "kid"
in sexagenarian body
on the senior citizen chopping block
within Lake Woebegone
hard space and rock
as inevitable doom
each second - coming inevitably
approaches closer tick tock.
and ruffling turkey feathers!

An innocent miss steak kin...
once former main lion,
resident iz cow herd vegetarian boar

ring beastie boy, who doth
newt practice, what he preaches your
truly battens down chicken
coop hatches so... call me galore
re: us hypocritic,
this honest to dog omnivore – more

accurate said buzzfeeding primate -
**** sapiens, he whelk hams
adieu after quick bonjour
hears ear splitting eeyore
deaf finning chore
tills unable to ignore

admits transgression,
now wonder wherefore
whether art thou still
game to reed my adore
hub bull poetry
understandable if ye deplore

such atrocious, egregious, opprobrious...,
violating ethical core
**** regarding straying
against dietary herbivore
rudimentary eel lamb ants
(chocolate covered my dear Watson)

boot fault in the starfish...por
favor mice elf can
oxe plain twittering like plover
with reasonable rhyme for sure
don't get doggy dimples in bunch
cause to skewer me but... but before...

sending killing squad to slaughter -
this puppy, aye kindly honour
my wish and don
me noggin with pompadour
as fetching drag queen
torpedo sized *****

squirting parti-color
milk as self defense mechanism
averting casus belli thus
amidst melee I abhor
find self on horns of dilemma
life story these of this poor

cooked goose flambé
caught between rock and trapdoor
special cannibal delight
where madding crowd
chants "send him back"
accursed unconscionable roar

ring anger, but lurch for eats,
an impulsive reflex courtesy extempore
rain nee yes unforgivable poor
craven impulse to up peas hunger
uncontrollably craving regarding carnivore

pang additionally not further injure
ring innocent animal plus more
to this fishy tail than
meats the Wawa birdseye.
179 · Mar 2019
Perdition Be Damned!
Body electric zapped
lower gastrointestinal tract
wracked with wretchedness
pitted, rocked, and tortured
severe muscle spasms cramp
deathly hallowed deliverance

beseech divine creator to exorcise relief
any panacea trumpeted vetoed
pestilential nausea diarrhea
wreaks relentless havoc
horrid ordeal twists insides
lack strength to live

breathing a laborious effort
bedrest temporarily alleviates
generally healthy ironclad junket
weatherbeaten rickety ship of state
restorative sought trouncing unwell
corporeal self against torture

assailing, castrating,
and drubbing existence
avocations ordinarily promulgating
resplendent joie de vivre
squelched, scotched, and sabotaged,
courtesy minuscule mailer daemons

emotions unlikely culprit,
though times gone by anxiety
tindered, pitched, and kindled
abominable irritable bowel syndrome
prescription medication tempered
badgering, crippling, and debilitating

panic attacks plagued this primate
manifesting feeble endeavor
to experience poignant satiation,
asper simple pleasures nonexotic
endeavors merely passively living
as one organic carbon based

human being finding fulfillment
meditating, reading, and writing,
now fleeced, deprived, and blitzed
suspicious disagreeable provender
perhaps lactose intolerance

after enjoying pizza birthday
fours days prior
celebrating chronological centenary,
sans one frail resident here,
Highland Manor Apartments
suddenly, I feel chill o' rigor mortis!
to mein kampf insync with mine body dysmorphia

After reading articles
published within April 4/11 2022
of The Nation
I challenged the efficacy
taking prescription medication
categorized as SSRIs
and/or SNRIs.

Unpleasant side effects
such as earth shaking dreams
and/or especially hefty weight gain
linkedin with former
comprising my daily cocktail
of approved prescription medication
courtesy nurse practitioner.

Deliberation about courting death rooted
throughout mine psyche
fueling sinister chortle
at least since bout with anorexia nervosa,
but... maybe ginned blood,
sans umbilical cord transfused in utero aortal,

though long since recovered, the intractable,
haunting specter, sans grim reaper
intertwining within every fiber of this mortal
rooted, grounded deep, and branched out
into each nook and cranny portal.

Said notion provoked,
when made painfully aware
youngest daughter (aged twenty three)
plagued with similar thoughts,
**** genetics did maliciously engineer

clutching telephone while
seated at edge of chair
did apologetically, despairingly,
grievously... did air
pestilential, penitential, plenipotential... scare

re: distraction and understandable fear,
she might unwittingly plunge
into hopeless abysmal despair
falling prey into irrevocable
deathly hallows lair,

though kudos for her
from me, this sole Harris heir
to communicate, (albeit
hesitantly) into mine ear
suddenly wishing thy

Shayna Punim to be near,
but residing (about three hour drive
southeast of Portland, Oregon)
with my kid sister, attentive to welfare,
a sibling whose persona

doth show tender loving care
and concern, this papa
felt reassured there
would be every action taken
with sixth sense to beware

lest progeny exhibits
pointedly obvious lurching career
dramatic slide in tandem
with Old Rotten Gotham
into behavioral sink
emergency measures sibling
immediately would commandeer,

hence somewhat relieved thee dear
beloved progeny receptive to hear,
this dada expressed his unconditional love,
and grateful psychological intervention
offspring boldly did declare

indicative professional help volunteer
really asserted necessary to stave off
how dice throw of fate unfair
to said lass, whose demise,
would abruptly **** this sonneteer!
179 · Jul 2023
Espousing irreverent greed
Crafted one year ago today
yours truly – hopefully self plagiarism okay
worse case scenario,
I would meet ill fate re: kenway
named after Assassin Creed
Black Flag's protagonist.

"Yo, I totally Kenwayed that guy."
by Bilbusbagginzies

Passive stance, but aye agreed
and did promise to pledge troth
faster than greased lightning airspeed
once the missus temporarily
ceased menarche regarding monthly bleed
became in family way with child
thee eldest, whom one day may breed,
when permanently settled
or opting out begetting offspring,
alluded daughter much more mature,
cuz parent trap truly ensnared me,
and I nearly capsized
manning figurative prairie schooner,
I captained poorly
barely surviving emotionally
analogously shipwrecked existence
I must forthrightly concede
done dirt cheap ***** deed.

Unlike das papa, first born proactive
taking preventative measures
to avoid begetting offspring
with college manual, she carefully plots
being masterfully persevering
enroute to notch curriculum vitae
with two additional years of schooling
University of Pennsylvania degreed
well self groomed for succeeding

at aforementioned Ivy League
years before taking
advanced placement courses
at Harriton High School
yielding to positive advisory feedback,
she wisely did heed
shipshape smarts anchors ahoy mate
passed academic challenges
with flying colors
well seasoned life, yes indeed.

Wherefore sexually reckless
behaviour, though I eventually wed
future mother housing zygote,
nevertheless did bungle responsibilities
to exponential powers of ten -
experienced challenges to exceed
capacity of yours truly to handle
whacking thru jungle of lady love
until...making head way
verboten fruit fricasseed
essentially purring kitty
I petted and proceeded to feed
pitched, hitched, ditched

libido in throes of monkish celibacy,
procreating analogous to filigreed
custom made jewel of denial,
bubbling self cleaning oven,
plus compelled tug get ***** freed
after being ****** asthma gumweed
glommed, where male member
tiptoed thru tulips playing ukulele
playing biological equivalent
risque business "Russian roulette"
pregnancy eventually guaranteed.

Unlike me wily ***** cocked,
limp bizkit primed to hawk kitty
then future spouse did not intercede
once peppy begged, connived,
to forego birth control and test virility
attested, claimed, *******, et cetera
arousal without prophylactics keyed
sowing wild oats courtesy yours truly
didst adeptly beg, burrow, knead
testosterone totally tubular
lil trouser snake did proceed
letting call of wild take lead
tube steak king claim for fatherland
heady after slurping boot legged mead
stifled unnatural prime mate years
pent up ****** urge, thus did supercede.

Thence sore relief yours truly did need
for swearing against wearing raincoat
at seminal moment blithely releasing seed
subsequent expense imposed
on fecund counterpart
with snoop doggy dogg speed
generating prickly heat
inducing ***** fied stampede
appetite for reproduction
struggling with common sense
(particularly lacking gainful employment)
raising and supporting young ones
incurred courtesy one or more progeny
needs and wants of offspring,
who sprouted like loco crazy ****,
as greater demands imposed
on their mama and papa.
Hence... what better opportunity, I aver with zeal
presented to one local everyman token schlemiel
keystone state (Pennsylvania) three score lifelong
trumpeting resident in United States commonweal
experiencing severe withdrawal symptoms I feel

plenti linkedin with voracious insatiable appetite
to buzzfeed chronically hungry fancy feast appeal
courtesy poetic generic electronic communiqué 4
hard/soft bound nuggets, essentially noggin fodder
printed paginated good n plenti thought provoking

firing imagination (mine) moost any genre squeal
with excitement well written satisfaction guarantee
to assuage, mental massage bitcoin blockchain me
lack legal tender, but amenable safe passage steal
under cover of darkness, stay 4 delicious hot meal

pop slop special of every day curative against past,
present and future pandemics inducing batty *******
behavior, yet please truck over (and/or rig delivery)
regarding lifetime woolworth (dime a dozen pennies
on dollar) riveting, spellbinding, tantalizing timeless

tomes some dubbed cult classic literature, everlasting
an ideal getaway quarantined within dystopian surreal
"new normal" alienation courtesy social distancing ye
become linkedin among disembodied soul train flitting
hither and yon, to & fro across cyber spatial dimension

storied pages offer healthy escape to getaway funereal
smothering unnatural cloistered atmosphere confined
temporarily alleviate forced imposition to toe line heel
spontaneity crushed every impulse to commingle spiel
broadcast how contagious coronavirus contracted air

tight sequestration impossible mission, where isolation
induces cabin fever delirious skeptics hatch conspiracy
theorists to convince population mounting thumbwheel
(albeit invisible) prima facie Covid-19 originated in bats,
scientists concur possibly spread to pangolins* & human

nonetheless devout believers pray to divine power kneal
expiating, purging, repenting sins past, present and future
beseechingly, devotedly, fondly craning neck to empyreal
infinite cosmos all powerful rhetorically asking -
What's the big effing deal?! Rejecting panglossian retort.

https://www.google.com/search?client=safari&channel=
macbm&source=hp&ei=iRSSXtmzHquxytMP85-c-Ag&q=
define+pangolins&oq=define+pangolins&gs
lcp=
CgZwc3ktYWIQARgAMgIIADIFCAAQzQIyBQgAEM
0CMgUIABDNAjIFCAAQ­zQI6DggAEOoCELQCEJoB

EOUCOgUIABCDAToHCAAQRhD5AToECAAQCkoiC
BcSHj­E3OWc1Mmc1Mmc0OGc1Mmc1Mmc0Mmc1M
WcxMS01N0oYCBgSFDFnMWcxZzFnMWcxZz­FnMmcx
MS0xUL0kWMpLYPdVaABwAHgAgAGnAYgBrwSSAQ
M5LjGYAQCgAQGgAQKqA­Qdnd3Mtd2l6sAEG&sclient=psy-ab

*Pangolins, or scaly anteaters, mammals of Pholidota order.
The one extant family, Manidae, includes three genera: Manis,
Phataginus and Smutsia. Manis comprises four species found
in Asia, while Phataginus and Smutsia each include two
species living in Sub-Saharan Africa.Wikipedia.
Coincides with first day of fall
and Autumnal equinox for said year,
where colorful splash kindled like tinder.

After I riff flecked about thee August
Autumn Equinox 2023,
this seasonal polymath teached you
fall Equinox will be Saturday,
September 23, 2023, at 2:50 AM,
in Northern Hemisphere
Eastern Daylight Time,
which spoiler alert thy
learned wordsmith (courtesy Google),
when (Our Sun) Welles

(exemplary Citizen Kane)
crosses celestial equator
i.e. (imaginary line in sheltering sky
wherein pantheon of mankind Bowles
above Earth's Equator
from north to south),
a barley detectable
quiet rye hit
(*** on feel the noise)
moment occurs.

Eyesore fissured **** – wide,
stripping crust of planet vied
where survival of fittest futilely tried
to the max, viz (courtesy
badass beastie boys of **** sapiens)
exploited, offended, and violated
beholden hidebound sacred
contractually fragile important obligations
arranged marriage wedded  
civilization and its discontents to Mother Earth,
(more like shotgun wedding)

alarming, blaring, and clanging
sounding Doomsday Clock,
where ambivalence unheeded
trebling cleft noteworthy
wound, where hide rubbed raw
each betrothed nsync, didst guide
generic hominids shrugging indifference
resembling Atlas sized fountain head
scathing tragic misguided
exploitative testament writ large,

where precious resources exploited
**** sapiens railroading, snubbing,
and thumbing nose
despite flora and fauna espied
comprising onced vibrant edenic biosphere
(figuratively) asper dead
serious portentous desperate
global abuse decried
as feeble effort ignoring
inevitable demise doth decide

dismissively prophesying mocking
(burdensome), whence creator cried
resplendent raiment
adorned playfully chide,
sans whirled, wide webbed biota
adorn terra firmae analogous,
quadrants expectant wedded bride
named Gaia, when (dark and Stormy Dan
yells) Armageddon legatee - time ran
out for **** sapiens meaning...

salvation to late for human
fate i.e. as does wrecking,
(falling on deaf ears) plea
as Mother Nature dost allied;
this observer awestruck,
knitted brows, cuz field day, sans
grim reaper will
glory in field day
whar crisscrossed lovely bones
numb skulls pay fealty.

Festive gatherings of
apple cider and pumpkin pie,
a distinct golden jacketed
matted palette well nigh
paints arboreal swath, sans
quiet riot of brilliant
color, that doth belie
rampant terrestrial, unreal,
and venal degradation aye
temporarily turning a (third)
blind eye apathetically, blithely,
and conveniently shunting aside

empyrean découpage citadel
betokens (bespeaks) autumnal arrival
two oh fifty ante meridian
chariot of fire emblazons telltale signature,
one humble human doth
bid summer and his squandered life adieu
courtesy handy dandy blue's clue
flora and fauna begin
to prepare for hibernation.

Onset of harvest time witnesses
courtesy sweat of one's brow
he/she doth reap (and feeling invigorated)
what they did sow.

Common type of implements utilized
when gathering in of crops
include small sickle, big sickle,
darat, gandasa and small axe et cetera.

The hand sickle is used to harvest crops
like wheat, maize, barley, pulses and grass etc.

Big sickle (Darat) used
to harvest fodder from trees
silent whoosh of sickle
signals harvest hew
and/or raking leaves,
which I eschew.

Already crisp cool mornings
sun kissed mine cheek
refreshing air wafts thru longish hair
trademark characteristic property
aging pencil neck geek
attends brief bathroom charge coffee
exotic brew jolted kidneys leak
***** not kidding water closet doth reek.

Especially third season upon us mortals
Montgomery county, Pennsylvania
said geographic real estate sloughs
(i.e. sheds) summer dog days
necessitating shuddered windows
disallowing natural aeration
to circulate thru unit B44
cozy one bedroom apartment.

I will stave off clicking on the heat,
as long as possible,
yet invariably come first frost
yours truly will renege
and surrender creature comfort,
albeit climate controlled temptation
similar when global warming
quite evident predicated upon
Farmers' Almanac prophetic prediction.

Though ecology minded
quick acclimation to unseasonable
hot or cold temperatures
finds me adjusting thermostat dial
mainly to thwart palmar hyperhidrosis
regarding turning on air conditioning
during sweltering triple digit
(Fahrenheit) thermometer readings,
versus absent sweaty hands
courtesy old man winter arctic blast.

Ah... remembrance of wood burning
stove late papa lit,
to dispense chill pervading childhood home
324 Level Road christened "Glen Elm"
within national (local registry)
when Leiper family initially occupied estate
at that time (think early twentieth century)
merely intended as summer getaway.

This time of year finds me
to reminisce and wax poetic
nostalgia more pronounced,
particularly as aspiring wordsmith
orbitz the sun seemingly
with greater rapidity
twelve months cycling at light speed
ruminating, punctuating equilibrium,
and narrating mortality

accentuated when flora and fauna
exhibit metaphorical raiment
presaging Mother Nature's fall fashion show
linkedin with approaching senescence
prompting generic garden variety **** sapien
to rue his transience upon oblate spheroid.

Gentrification impossible mission
thus thy lovely bones will subsequently
become repurposed into  ashes
sprinkled hither and yon to and fro
across elysium fields
of happy hunting grounds.
Sent my smooching life south,
whereby I felt like poor Georgie Porgie,
pudding and pie,
who kissed the girls and made them cry.

The medical term for cold sores,
****** Labialis, refers
to the ****** virus Type 1 (HSV-1)
that most often causes these sores,
though ****** virus Type 2 (HSV-2)
less often can also be a cause.

Courtesy chafing lower denture
the inside lower lip of mine
(analogous when braces
donned by pearly whites -
long since ravaged
and removed by Periodontitis;
A serious gum infection
that damaged gums
and can destroy the jawbone)
rubbed raw firing, kickstarting,
and triggering throbbing ache
before going to sleep,
whether for a siesta
or bidding adieu
to the webbed wide world until the morrow,
and upon soon after I wake
attempting, daring, and farcing
to crack a smile
experience needling pain for doggone sake.

Yours truly most seriously,
affected with oral blight
when rumblies in tummy
signal appeasement of appetite
teasing viands with pronounced delight
impossible mission to masticate,
thus I reconcile myself experiencing pain
when chomping on solid foods,
whereby the bilabial fricative
actuated courtesy chewing motion,
(especially movement of lower jaw)
doth indelibly etch and sketch copyright
infringement onto soft tissue
aggravating, grooving, and torturing
satisfactorily done by the mandible
constituting lower jaw or jawbone
regarding the bottom skeleton
that makes up the lower
(and typically also the more mobile)
half of the mouth in jawed vertebrates.

While at C(ustomer) V(alued) S(ervice)
store at 1206 Gravel Pike, Zieglerville,
Pennsylvania 19492 - on a whim,
I purchased Peroxide Sore Mouth Cleaner
an over the counter product
and painless solution
to alleviate and heal
ulcerated, and lacerated fever blister
inside lower lip of this mister
re: man, whose spouse considers me weird
and peculiarly wired

as most likely would deux daughters I sired,
though both free and clear
despite their former impressionable years
being severely mired
with unnecessary financial hardship
whose lack of healthy
gainful employment track record
(essentially... I got fired)
linkedin to mental health issues,
thus no surprise when
the writer of these words desired

exiting realm of living social
(think passive suicidal ideation),
particularly manifest destiny
to join the underground movement
of the dead souls, when fraudsters
exerted remote mind control
managed to apply psychological ploy
leaving an immense black hole
sun leaving sense and sensibility extinct,
whereat I found myself in good company
with the Baltimore Oriole
along the Eastern United States.

The posted gofundme page...
oh that came to naught,
thus I live hand to mouth
still holding out hope
some anonymous benefactor
would vicariously writhe nsync
with mein kampf.
178 · Sep 2018
Ten Percent Brain Myth
Medical and/or scientific experts
     doth now corroborate,
promulgate, validate...(wait
don't go there's much more)
     linkedin with falsehood
     that requires me to terminate,
an average dumb founded guy
     (noir) tasked with rectifying

     (with quiet riot) eek quate
absolute zero truthfulness humans
     only use 10 percent
     (or other small percentage)
     brain power in (Jean) Nate,
or anybody else for that manner
     ("say hypothetically
     gals named Kate)

which unfounded,
which urban cowboy legend
     persisting in perpetuity, I hate
tubby the bearer
     of unwelcome news
     (doubling up and
     down as a pernicious
     cherished rumor squasher

boot nada one
     reputable specialist studying
     intellectual potential,
     would unilaterally vouchsafe,
     (and risk their judicious, marvelous,
     and prestigious reputation,
     which years to elevate),
yet such stubborn presumption

     firmly maintained latched onto
     (analogous to fish unknowingly
     snagged with "FAKE" bait)
nonetheless specialists of the
     (egg shaped) noggin
     do attest in aggregate
that some n'er
     do well (christened

     Matthew Scott Harris)
     did whimsically create
believable Trumpism,
     which invalid conclusion
     adopted to enervate
his own cognitive impairment,
     thus motivating him
     tubby poetically great,

and even though, he got told
     afore stated said
     baseless, groundless and/or
     premise, aye intimate,
the sure fire way
     to expunge (purge) nagging notion
     (short of a karate
chop to his fountain

     head of noodle,
     which idea to in Tim mate,
would not rank as emphatic,
     dramatic, and/or climatic,
     as electric shock therapy
     last ditch effort to operate.
POETIC PREFACE:

An inner conflict dust brew
within this scribe, who offers ye to chew
(like sweet treats metaphorically) thee do
tee incumbent, when Doomsday clock
counts down minutes few
according Al Gore rhythm
unstoppably ticking,
when life gets turned to global goo
tenderized viz Doctor Zeus
if not Horton Hears Hoo
then most definitely The Lorax

(couching urgent morals underscored
by satellite photographs
showing melting ice caps or igloo,
which planetary sos, sans in extremis
requires joint effort of Gentile and Jew,
plus every other sectarian credo,
dogma, ethos, faith...knew
clear family, and whatnot
to become linkedin with Linda Loo
yes, we moost not forget

Old MacDonald with his moo
moo there bovine creatures
agedly hobbling along, or new
lee born, cuz juiced one day
per three hundred and sixty five
(six with leap year -
imagine dragons festooned leotard
with brand name Oroblu)
or poor ole Winnie The Pooh
eternally stuck in Rabbit's
hole sum Hutch as a queue

doth loosely form dreaming up and rue
mien hating solution
to eradicate toxins humankind doth spew
into the atmosphere
(burning the midnight oil) true
lee trying to remedy plight
of said bear character,
perhaps unstated message being woo
king in tandem solutions to resolve
wretched condition of world wide web
possible by bridging differences
between me and you, and you, and you...

Earth Day 2021 – Thursday April 22

Every day ought
necessitate reverence towards Gaia
a vibrant living and breathing planet entity
experiencing upon her land and seas.

Bajillion banshees scream ****** ****** methought
upon Biblical (lionized) forebears stalking heads
birthed courtesy accursed beasts hood besought
winds howl across the oblate spheroid
methinks courtesy **** sapiens horror wrought.

Climate change/global warming siren song
Adam event since time immemorial against
sacred covenant doing Mother Nature wrong
April 22nd waning hours warn us King Kong
antithetical, egotistical, & heretical caretakers
over populated quintessential rowdy sinning
rawbit & powdermilk biscuit munching throng.

Antiestablishmentarian gambit voiced, I tootle
(albeit figuratively), and feign playing trumpet
challenging when born with submucous palate
lamely feeble attempt made tinkering with words
aware crushing humanity legacy takes Herculean
effort to implement global revolution, staging and
coaching proselytizers to shine klieg lights where
industrialization tattooed unseemly sights land
once (unimaginably) pristine acres irrevocably
repurposed into grotesque disfigured terra firma.

Fifty one years ago come
(The First Earth Day in April 22nd, 1970)
courtesy Senator ******* Nelson
orchestrated first metaphorical telescoping
lens zooming close
far more horrible than
"fake" special effects we
as collective species
impacted planet harkening
back when nasty, short
and brutish proto humans

mastered steely ironic
mettle to fell one after tree
after another, I need
not axe the question if queasy
induced state imagined
envisioning yourself, née
Pandora's box (purported
inventiveness) suddenly vaulted
and unhinged inkling,
when beastie boys plus goo

goo dolls loosed goods
no longer under lock and key
i.e. raw materials to fashion,
whatever struck fancy
re: innately "gifted"
descendent afforded momentary
recognition (nameless
naked apes) that hit upon idea
way manifold generations
before iconic light bulb lit

western civilization taming
current of (ohm my dog)
flow of electrons to supply
amply charging electricity
countless intervenvening
millennium one after another
survival of the fittest likely
accidentally melded insight
with (then) near infinite
natural resources labored away.

Unbeknownst, when chance
cerebral serendipity gave way
where inchoate deliberation,
how ardent smarts applied today
gave dawn of consciousness
quantum leap launching landlubbers
****** into the seven seas eventually
marshalling routes to unknown,
nevertheless pirated quay
zee whirled wide watery web
long ago hushing nay
saying doubting Thomas
(English muffin chomping chap),
especially at financing
and cost courtesy bourgeoisie
the same old bay...
sic yacht ta yacht ta yacht ta.
An innocent miss steak kin...
once former main lion den cha hoard servant,
resident iz cow herd vegetarian boar
hoof faux whatever reason iz explore

ring bing foo fighting beastie boy, who doth
newt practice, what he preaches your
truly battens down chicken
coop hatches so... call me galore
re: us hypocritic,
this honest to dog omnivore – more

accurate said buzzfeeding primate -
**** sapiens, he whelk hams
adieu after quick bonjour
hears ear splitting eeyore
deaf finning chore
tills unable to ignore

admits transgression,
now wonder wherefore
whether art thou still
game to reed my adore
hub bull poetry
understandable if ye deplore

such atrocious, egregious, opprobrious...,
violating ethical core
**** regarding straying
against dietary herbivore
rudimentary eel lamb ants
(chocolate covered my dear Watson)

boot fault in the starfish...por
favor mice elf can
oxe plain twittering like plover
with reasonable rhyme for sure
don't get doggy dimples in bunch
cause to skewer me but... but before...

sending killing squad to slaughter -
this puppy, aye kindly honour
my wish and don
me noggin with pompadour
as fetching drag queen
torpedo sized *****

squirting parti-color
milk as self defense mechanism
averting casus belli thus
amidst melee I abhor
find self on horns of dilemma
life story of this poor

cooked goose flambé
caught between rock and trapdoor
special cannibal delight
where madding crowd
chants "send him back"
accursed unconscionable roar

ring anger, but lurch for eats,
an impulsive reflex courtesy extempore
rain nee yes unforgivable poor
craven impulse to up peas hunger
uncontrollably craving regarding carnivore

pang additionally not further injure
ring innocent animal plus more
to this fishy tail than
meats the Wawa birdseye.
One garden variety generic male - the
very writer of these words feels akin
to an anachronism, whereby his being
alive at this juncture within the space/
time continuum (July 29th, 2022 – an
ordinary day) finds me mismatched

with the fast paced civilization – ink comp
passing the greater part of webbed wide
world, where premium placed upon
inherent strengths such as: supreme
abilities in artistry, athleticism, comedy
computers, horse whispering

(nay-saying patriarchal system -
particularly wrought courtesy
White Anglo Saxon Protestants,
whereby codas, dogma, edicts...
crafted to benefit mortals who
usurped land occupied by natives.)

I don't belong with any earthly age,
creed, denomination, nationality,
race, religion, et cetera, but consider
myself an outlier hiding in dark shadows
cast courtesy outer limits of the
twilight zone, a foreigner among strangers.

Aghast at explosive industrialization/
urbanization once sacred wild woodland
whittled away overlain bumper crops
comprising trappings green lighted
supposedly signaling progress unwittingly
overrides avast enclave (teeming with

diverse flora and fauna passively cleared,
dominated, expropriated by dictate of
commercialization, exploitation, fabrication
fueling amalgamation, fabrication, lubrication
oiling cogs and wheels sustaining, murdering
guaranteeing production trumpeted at

expense native flora and fauna acquisition,
cooptation, extermination, gratification
decreed ******* **** sapiens usurped
law of land i.e. eminent domain foisted
upon unsullied "new world" defining
European age of exploration, whereby

pristine undulating immense acres
indiscriminately partitioned, (despite
indigenous peoples unrecognized precedence
to remain holistic caretakers of Mother
Earth tendered, predicated, linkedin with
generations worth of sacredness, which

spiritual reverence meant naught to
unwelcome trespassers solely hell bent
to force acquiescence, compliance,
obeisance,... to warlords, whose cruel,
diabolical gall lee jeepers libidinal
incursions sought extinction toward

defenceless native inhabitants subject
to machinations spelling extermination,
yet their restless spirits infiltrate occupants
of once happy hunting grounds devoid
without a trace, when this bucolic tract
devoid of present schlocky vinyl zoned

abodes, whereby fast disappearing vestige
alluding to pastoral vista spurs overactive
imagination regarding yours truly, who
chiefly hankers he got born during
sparse population versus pell mell hustle.
heil to the Wharton chief firebrand -
more worrisome than an ovarian cyst
every race, religion, nationality,
gender, creed, et cetera with impunity dissed
brigand able, eager, ready and willing
to punch contenders throwing his fist
against rival – one nasty and brutish soul
after reading, you get the gist
how dictator wannabe lurching
with tremendous oaf fish shill

blatantly, flagrantly, and glad-handedly
zapping usurping power, breeding dissent
soundlessly slithering,
spreading vile disinformation
onto social media platforms
targeting undecided electorates
analogous to casting dark shadows
across the edge of night
hissed tory revoked eclipsed
loosing unfettered horrors.

Das boot trump out-
(oust him to) Waterloo
Eagerly awaits you
the bully in the white house and true.

Whit that, yawl get a lucky strike
if ya keep yar show
as my Reince prescience foretells this poe
fur one quarter off hiz terminal daze starring down
(with bad medicine), thee ole scarecrow.

╰☆╮ Thankfully, I'm not a royal heir
to the power monger hoarders╰☆╮
which comb hen might handy when borders
hermetically sealed - per heil hit lore
caw zing a furor with his stark jumbo je lay bean orders.

I don't wanna don a duck dynasty outfit,
or that of a woodchucker but...holy mother f*cker
and kudos to any heckler,
who deems steam roller trump as a mean trucker.

Thus - for the umpteenth attempt to post
without any intention
to induce rabid reaction to roast
my *** (albeit scrawny just to be cheeky),
I **** rye America will burn like toast
the legacy of democracy
transparent as a ghost
if....mister money bags - to the finish line
of presidential electorate, he doth coast.

My anti Donald trump screed continues tut try
tip picture conjure pixelated stress less or more
WE MUST DO MORE THAN YODEL LOUD:
(and preach to the choir)
out....out...get...life not death, he seems to ab ****
ding **** Donald drake...out...of...here...
without...his security detail or...coat....of...
(Emperor wears no clothes) armor.

I will not condone political measures
from that mane lion kapo -
jabbering indiscretion.

Herewith follows a poem
(concatenated with above lines)
I dashed off in a huff - to douse
dat auld don trumpeting joie de vivre
fin de siecle utopia of yesteryear
puffin sewerage bilge -
strike n horror n ma eyes -
for opinion aye espouse
based on scary political fracas
and looming nightmare -

whar mo' will grouse
to obstruct trump access
to black keys to white house
that a looming presidential nightmare
doth not become real - gruff louse
he will crush sacred freedoms,
whence western civilization goes off bluff
analogous to a rabid cat terminating
the life of more'n Mickey Mouse.

DUCK AFTER DUMP - PING THE DON -
a pipe dream that will never take shape.

Air ring ma thoughts - no matter aye ham
juiced one twenty first century mwm ape
serves as genuine s cape
to fly (during pitch black hours of night)
on his witch a ma call it...
to escape temporarily the cares and concerns
of an uncertain world,
where as an outlier from madding crowd I gape

at the sheer insanity
trumpeting strumpets donning an innate
prejudice and senselessness purr
blind faith toward self avowed demigod --
seize ***** viz Caesar -

forever linkedin with maxim
Veni, Vedi, Vici - idolized statecraft motto
Trump perfects with his witch's brew he doth stir
his hair coiffed and puffed like it whir
wind blown kickstart ting mobs to stir
paying Deep Purple bodyguards
to evict ruckus-causing murmur
oh...how the masses will let this country
go to hell in handbasket -
blithely purging the Iran Nuclear Deal,
The Paris Climate Agreement

plus rack up stratospheric global debt
cause zing this one measly mortal male to fret
Boom, boom, boom gotta get get
that totalitarian rule will force every man,
woman and child to march....het
two...three...four, while the billionaire
turns a third blind eye speeds away
in his foo fighter jet
argh...heavens to Betsy Ross,
Condoleezza Rice, Nancy Reagan,

Barenaked Ladies, and Goo Goo Dolls,
how did the fickle finger of fate let
this pompous *** allergic
to law and order sowing,
loosing, and fomenting insurrection
crowdsourcing, wherever anarchy met
vacuums up majority votes
across world wide
quartered, (tattered), and webbed net
to finagle vox populi,

and groom hooligan nasty ruffian thugs
with smashed face as his smart pet
GoLong Daddy story short -
pondering my rental circumstance
will be upended if this ret
chad, evil, googly-eyed, gastronomic,
narcissistic bullish Don will set
the spark for world war three -
via gone ah re: ha...ha...ha...to all vet
tureens within the sea to shining cyber sea

American crucible melting *** -
with verbal whips,
whose invective blast sucker punching
DACA, and those
who strain to uphold economic backbone,
he does NOT STOP to undermine stoop labor,
which anonymous backs,
he bloodies via twittering whetstone
unless....Katrina and the Waves, superman
or the Sabrina can oust him yet.
Yet upon another reflexive routine dash
skipping to Waterloo, I got emboldened
with idea praising basic vital functions
aware requisite elimination of liquid
and/or solid waste any obstruction
disallowing body to expel toxins would

prove fatal, thus gratitude toward
regular unpicturized, unhindered, and
unaided intervening measures undertaken
to experience thee nonpareil pleasures
actuated without purgative, yet should
instance arise finding impossibility

to exercise sphincter muscle
(constipation worse fate than
perdition) alleviating solid state brick
like blockage spasm inducing agony
within me ***, yours truly racks impound
did severely inconvenienced physical

self accessing natural remedy to soften
stool temporarily incapacitating peaceful
ease zee ex-lax feeling accompanying
experience that approximates how pregnant
mother inundated with contractions ready to
give birth, whereat merciful joyous crying

emanates courtesy this humble human, no
matter he never tested his steely ironic
mettle say completing wilderness survival
course, but rarely speculates such grueling
boot camp self inflicted challenges
pale in comparison to loosing bowel

movement big enough to sink battleship, and
mighty exertion finally dumps payload,
the toilet bowl hastens meteorologists to
issue tsunami warnings insync with "****
the torpedo" this ole windbag blasted clear
across contiguous United States, where

whizzing, sounding, jet setting like
speeding bullet (self Mach re:) puzzled
onlookers mistake me for some foreign entity
lost in space analogous to detect a stylish alien
(pants bunched around ankles - most definitely

tell tale clue, asper rating him hip hopping
longfellow), yea undoubtedly a messenger
from outer limits of twilight zone sent to...
wait...his trumpeting **** gaseous, an utter
farts feigning "FAKE" comet tee.
curt hissy Matthew Scott Harris
who wishes ewe well
to make $cents of the following
mumbo jumbo lettered gumbo.

Hip puck crease see
(ad hoc) key hide dee claim
haint how my noggin
comports itself to take aim,
cuz ear lee aire two
yeast tar dies ague
this hue more us,
in fame muss wordsmith
cure rafting re: son hubble rhyme
doggone cur rafted twin tee ****
hound day hove March
(twenty second of)
tooth house sin twenty two,

(Lifer til death date woo eth death)
an hon nah - bell and clapper bloke
mostly silly key ping (faw) lame
fee bill word tangler,
rustler, mangler, a (name)
grossly misunderstood
acts ill rod gunmetal read rose,
but wean mice elf (in tha same
deep blue sea of
sigh bore space), and tame
ghost of Noah Web stir,
(the "Father of American 
Scholarship and Education").

Mine whole foods (bran)
whole *** graphic image gleefully 
danced like cranberries...
er Shuga plums
buff fore my ayes 
gent lee guy ding even odd lil old
me - disc hum bob yule hated thoughts.

He winked, blinked, and nod did 
'pon every hip proved high fen -
phen hated dub bill loon
colon out fe fie fo fum...

Thus sigh prose seeded 
to brac kit this hen
speckled, pecked, choppy 
ram bulling miss sieve.

Now Kenya boll weave me, i.e.
nope heart tickle to rhyme, 
nor rheas zen, 
hex planes this alien ak queue men?

Thus ice elf seal heck head 
(i.e. spoiler alert selected)
top pick dis gobbledygook de 'zure 
one long in the tooth 
in dent charred papa, who war 
rents, through his 
Engle hush patois rue brick 
mishmash heavy sack crow sank
fill low so fickle road dough mont aid
e'en when deep
into Davy Jones's Locker 

(as taut tummy
by ma gram marred paw, 
he called home and leaved all his life
in Southeastern pence hull Vanya), 
tutoring, this war reed 
red word smith (screeching) 
viva veneer real with no dis ease: 
a broadcast inter gnash shin null plea
from puissant amazing

dragon hill though me
heretofore jest playfully peppering 
this poetic prey lewd pray zing gibberish,
boot ice till dune hot
take for grant (yule hiss sees)
who hit high robe hurt eel lee
cogent, fluent, intelligent,
lambent, overt, reverent...
succinctness, thus strictly for sport
(maya tip pickle mowed

dis hopper end dee)
inure inca ling hued bait tour
ring ship for fools (who russian,
where angels dare toot red),
and back to feeble poetic effort
sum er re: all reed dears mite ache -
against hub bull telescoping confusion
your understandable hub
jake shun accepted.
Bare skull and cross bones
     existence on the peripheral
     outskirts of poker flats
lives a slip of a man,
     whereat he never felt deserving
     accolades linkedin
     with appeasement,
     sans pat on back congrats,

asper bringing peace,
     and tranquility to the
     kingdom taken over
     by trumpeting democrats,
without any armed
     populace resorting,
     (nor police present)
     affecting a coup d'etat

     (carried out
     by military expats),
no...amazingly enough,
     non violent government
     takeover won by votes
     during midterm elections,
     who rendered
     the equivalent outcome

     (actually a stunt
     more difficult)
     than analogously bringing
     rabbits out of hats,
which predominant number
     of socially progressive winners
     shared the sir name "Katz"
ironic since such

     ethical congressional
     "Freshman" hoped to scare
     out all the corrupt rats
and, thus hit upon,
     (or one newly elected
     acolyte dreamt) master bait,
which involved one participant
     to experience potentially

     a stormy Dane yell'n date,
thus unnamed
     wizard (specializing
     in far out, and groovy
     grandiose high jinks fate
hood did don an outfit
     resembling the Great
Tony the Tiger, no matter,

     he reputedly happened
     tubby a serial killer,
yet said Grand
     Poobah did integrate
each puzzle piece
     of his Khanate
with a combination of
     bluster, gimcrackery

     cheap tricks deceit,
     "FAKE" hate
as to ****** the checkered mate,
(essentially a hie
     bred Matted Scottish
    tartan Harris tweed
     couture rib banned jester,
     who didst orchestrate)

so much tom foolery, his
     basic winning technique
    quite antic quate
head, nonetheless

     far more ingenious than
     latest technological state
of the art revolutionary
     trappings, thus never
     outmoded ways underrate!
178 · Jul 2019
Dear daughter
Avast emotional gulf manifested; courtesy
series of unfortunate events; sundered
biologically accorded, cherished, enshrined
paternal bond; resultant dereliction defies,
justifies, ratifies...dissonance; unbearable
hindsight excoriates impropriety reviewing

***** deeds done dirt cheap; impossible mission
to excise indelibly etched psychological
impacted repercussions upon mine fountainhead;
weighing excruciating deserved self loathing;
permanently deplorable depravity yoked;
unyielding choke hold, no longer asking

forgiveness, but airing errant culpability;
dada's guilt indefensible impropriety; begetting
permanent fallout; exacting just desserts; bitter
regret beast of burden (oxe see *****) housed
within self made villain; unjust to impinge your
providential opportunities, whose blessed smarts

plus unfettered, unencumbered, undaunted...
daring do promise productive existence par
excellence, versus anxiety riddled torturous
legacy writ large across countenance this papa;
analogously das scribe bing mortal epitaph, while
dark shadows haunt this edgy rusty knight, who

once pawn time shrugged off mischievous
lascivious actions as payback; recognizably erred;
misperceptions (mine); deduced ex post facto,
when the missus doled out unpleasantries;
exploding anger; vented regarding significant
roiling perturbations harkening to her own

unrepentant poisonous stinging toxicity;
delivered courtesy birth parents; hands lack
king awareness to rock cradle with tender
loving care, hence burdened with childhood
tsoris prior to accepting yours truly as life
contra dance partner these preceding xxii+

years avoiding unseemly behavior; aware
that the mother of our two darling daughters
doth love and forgive me, though recouping
similar results with first offspring may remain
tense, and many years past not a happy camper.
Analogous to black box
holding untold secrets,
I share the following self
introspection with ye,
which purported hidden truths
might set me free,
albeit laborious effort

to loose constituent amalgamated
compound elements unmined
tantamount to agony
riddling psyche effort to extract
thorny matters incumbent upon me
versus tapping Androcles and the lion
think Roman mythology.

Oftimes methinks... whoami
spending scores of years
with frustrated sigh
hermetically sealing body electric
housing generic garden variety guy
severely emotionally tormented
contemplating, integrating,
blithely urging wish to die

even at this moment,
yet reluctantly shy
away to embrace death wholeheartedly,
nor would I try
putting anonymous life (mine)
on the line, though...
nonetheless envisioning rejoicing
(as told to significant other -

the missus naturally averse
to my demise well nigh)
without ability to explain why
per se if mortal ailment
truncated mein kampf
Noel cowardly lie,
cuz becoming gratefully dead try
not to laugh while

yours truly cannot deny
permanent absence twill recognize
hard skool of knocks alumni
posthumously make his name linked with
hallowed as if that martyred,
though the feted occasion
beholds mine scattered
cremated ashes carried,

loosed, whisked... to sky
will not require men to don black tie,
nor mourn angst peppered soul,
no longer will any banshee cry
all quiet on western front forever reunify
me with cosmic consciousness eternal ally.
Fraught traumatized wordsmith
telephonic grand slam rent psyche asunder
witnessing helpless cannibalization,
hospitalization, victimization
concerning writer of these words,
and riders on the storm
namely robbing me third eye blind
of legal tender
under the convincing guise of Apple
computer technician pretender.

Buried deep inside
the dark webbed wide world
yours truly sends electronic sos
while being twirled
to and fro hither and yon
seeking emotional, mental,
and spiritual reprieve.

Incalculable loss of
countless crisp Benjamins
hungrily ****** up
and spit out as Bitcoin cryptocurrency
triggered stark realization
being under wicked spell
of one who calls himself Harvey Specter.

He cast a trance
upon body electric of mine
asking, coaxing, finagling,
ingeniously luring me to forfeit
every ****** red cent
constituting checking and savings accounts
two of each now registering zeros.

Quite an exhausting effort
taxing body, mind, and spirit
to wrench unhealthy vice grip
from out the analogous maws
adrip with ****** flesh.

No explicable rhyme nor reason,
how sense and sensibility
got blindsighted, when ordinarily
keen acute insight
can scent out immoral treason,
nevertheless when cruising cyber seas
late morning June twenty first
and also the twenty second
human piranha unexpectedly
found fresh **** in season.

Dumbfounded at mein kampf now
how stupid of me to surrender
blithely, forthrightly, willingly
thousands of dollars
as if held spellbound
under a somnambulant trance.

I keep reliving, requisitioning
and revisiting hellish nightmare
corporeal entity
waking up in a cold sweat
although dog tired
muster measly necessary energy
to summon sleepwalking
disembodied spirit
quietly whetting appetite

to succeed realization
bringing to fruition
impossible mission to catch thief
finally hatching pièce de résistance
witnessing long overdue comeuppance
to him who exploited innocence
of one aging beatle brow
foo fighting baby boomer
reduced to pennilessness.

Ye dear benevolent reader
might be tempted to rebuke or scold
(spare the rod, cuz I give myself
a regular severe dressing down)
merely seeking, praying,
and kick/jump starting
philanthropic aid forthcoming.

Unlikely culprit(s) will be caught
most likely rejoicing regarding
psyche of fraught
punishing me where
rainy day fund rendered naught.
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