Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
157 · Oct 2017
MARQUEE MOTIF
Neon lights broadcast sold out show of one Matthew Scott
expert stage craft presents quotidian shows without sound
sole audience forcibly revisits this biography performance
private owner lifetime supply of entire stock season tickets
(to one smash box office hit after another improvisational)
lightning speed mime hologram flashes life capsule oeuvre
corpus trials and tribulations indelibly recorded upon spool
sibilant auditory oohs and aahs from vindictive ultimatums
only one take each scene despite personal abysmal reviews
and serious consideration to hire professional management
accompanying actor, director, producer, projectionist writer
kept preserved upon cranial medium - so called gray matter
extant within the guarded and private repository Fort Knox
until the eventual disintegration from cumulative memories
become totally obscured with the thickening fogs of old age
and the curtain comes down on the final act upon mortality!
modesty nervous onstage
(ah...ah...ah...ham eye white...???)

***,... and he looks...
     SAY WHAT??? just like me???,...
     absolutely NO WAY!!!,
would this sensitive,
     respectful, "FAKE" veejay
quiet-natured, mindful,
     loving, kind, underplay
justice invoking, hew today

mainly, gentle, friendly, "I say"
enlightened, democratic chap redisplay
any besotted abominable,
     blamable, culpable, quay
esse chin hubble
     despicable, execrable prey
dot door formidable,
     inhospitable...overplay

ying faux indulgent,
     NOR be mistaken
     to assay, betray, convey,
display, expressway more fay
     writ his'm to
     gainsay hearsay, inveigh
jaw dropping "FAKE"
     yuge weak accusations

(by a long shot), sans
     basket of conspiring deplorables
     attempting to assassinate
bigly believe me tubby "stupid"
     winning loser to berate,
who doth unequivocally create
mine substantial vocabulary rumor,
     versus 4th grade reading level

     trumpeting librettist - thee great
test Don Quixote
     (as falsely sung with hate
full sotto voce), and ramped up
     as ill suited mate
a minus [sic] zero *****,
     which doth hapt
     tubby incredibly tremendous

     disservice to bona fide classy idiots
     with a lot of money
     (like the millions and billions
     of my golfing confrères)
given bent iron golf clubs
     used by crooked Hillary,
     when former Secretary of State
     ideal for Putin on the Ritz

by far less exciting, with
     Bill Clinton's flirtatious flits
trained pudenda purse
     sin null property
     of intern (NO FALLACY)
     topped as southern delicacy dish
consume mated with buttered grits
     pricked prurient peccadilloes licks

suddenly recalling seminal kicks
starting, how with Little Rock kits
he received assistance,
     sans starts and fits,
eventually then nubile
     ingenue Monica Lewinsky
     called time out, cuz at her wits
end once assisting helping

     express his "naughty bits,"
when done completing
     *** mincecd secrete mission
     blue dress draped
     expensively furred

(i.e. tricked out) in her
     "FAKE" minx hiding
     sable animal spirits,
when animal rights
     activists vehemently protested
     out-coming result
     slapping former president
     with a PETA file.
primary idiopathic palmar/
palmoplantar hyperhidrosis
despite taking  Glycopyrrolate
2 MG Tablet three times daily.

Aforementioned physiological malady
the bane worse than death
unwanted and unwonted figurative
(metaphorical) beast of burden
linkedin with matrix constituting mine
corporeal essence genetically
gifted to yours truly,
invariably, objectionably, and unquestionably
afflicts, impacts, and upsets
emotional (mental) health
diagnosed with schizoid personality disorder
and aggravated, jump/kickstarted, triggered...,
when body electric
of mine experiences duress.

Tis no fun unable
to join in any reindeer games
(actually quite aggravating)
to experience chronic instances,
whereby profuse sweat drips
(think rivaling Angel Falls),
the loftiest falls on land
inducing extreme self
consciousness and embarrassment.

Socialization compromised,
jeopardized, and sabotaged
against natural proclivity to fraternize,
thus avoidance behavior
(i.e. social distancing) rigorously practiced
way before coronavirus (COVID-19)

mandated staying at least 6 feet
(about 2 arm's length) from other people.
I vaguely recollect even while in utero
sweaty hands cooled courtesy amniotic fluid
yet subsequently observing consternation
obstetrician displayed as

itty bitty teensy weensy fingers
dripped - think faucet turned on full force.
Mein kampf (predominantly
describes solitary existence)
severely exacerbated (still prominent)

ability to function undermined
courtesy deux part and parcel
significant aforestated physiological
and social congenital afflictions
somewhat ameliorated by
about half dozen prescription medications.

I keep hermetically sealed
within our single bedroom apartment
(we lucked out with unit B44
providing us scenic view)
climate controlled when weather
hazy, hot and humid
at sixty degrees Fahrenheit
(you do the math to figure
the Centigrade temperature),
nevertheless these stubby
five fingered appendages
ooze perspiration on par
with spigots gushing sweat.

Worse fate than death finds me
suffering one or more
dogged following plagues:
water turning to blood, frogs, lice,
flies, livestock pestilence, boils, hail,
locusts, darkness and killing
of firstborn children far less oppressive
versus being stricken with Hyperhidrosis.

Sain above identified unpleasant fallout
understandably, quintessentially, and inextricably
linkedin within every fiber
moost likely activated since conception - mine
body electric infiltrated nerve wracking
complex corporeal edifice
interestingly enough solely overbearing
while yours truly wide awake
bright tailed and bushy eyed,
yet sleep ofttimes brings

severely dislocating, disquieting
and discombobulating
subconscious nocturnal experiences,
which frightful, maniacal, and
phantasmagorical vivid dreams
undermines, oppresses, and impinges,
any joie de vivre
creating abominable hell on Earth
thus this dirt poor commoner
pronouncing his intent

to beg, borrow and/or steal
(sell my soul to the devil)
in a desperate effort to secure
and pay King's ransom
to rid myself once and for all
of parasite entrenched nemesis
bleeding dry, leeching, and yoking
writer christened Matthew Scott Harris,
whereby he doth regularly writhe in agony.
courtesy malfunctioning garbage disposal

which won't be removed
by onsite maintenance man
UNTIL/UNLESS
fruit fly excreta wiped off
(impossible to access)
areas along bathroom and kitchen walls
so communicated "the warden."

Thus we (yours truly and his missus)
subjected to inhale
putrid, offal, and noxious
smelling stagnant water
until every streak
telltale sign regarding Drosophila melanogaster
exuded excretory evidence
vanishes without a trace
vis a vis thru cutting
qua yellow elbow grease.

Aforementioned hardy critter
approximately three millimeters in length
and two millimeters in width
one defiant little ******
proliferate - reproductive propensity
of fruit fly enormous
under ideal circumstances
female lays about 500 eggs

impossible mission to exterminate
or extinguish pesky species
without declaring total mortal kombat,
and even then
no guarantee targeted
above named mite size bug
nsync with his/her brethren
blown to smithereens.

Despite all pervasive existence
plus ingress into mine nasal passage
as nostril dam us foretold
annoyance on par with midges
flying up into nose
far more tolerable
synonymous with lesser of two evils
versus exhausting these lovely bones
tirelessly suctioning refuse
pooling fetid water.

I will seriously ponder
posting gofundme site
as a last ditch effort
to escape nauseating
effluence out the plumbing bowels
worse smell than rotten Gotham
sliding down into behavioral sink
if management here
at Highland Manor Apartments
decrees fiat all secretion
indeed linkedin with fruit fly eliminated.
Inexplicable blessing luckily
avoiding potentially grim fate
finds yours truly coming to grips,
how afterlife did not accommodate

the missus, and/or myself unwittingly
loved ones would never acclimate
reality of our permanent absence,
thus existence all the more I appreciate
and attempt poetically articulate.

Herewith the scenario that defies
conventional atheistic wisdom
finding me unable to square
involving 2009 Hyundai Sonata automobile

driven by spouse or her scribe, who dare
not allude to guardian angel,
yet conundrum inexplicable, when
touted as luck, regarding the rear
wheel bearing (passenger side of car)

that went kaput, blessedly ignorance
attributed absented scare,
yet in retrospect taking stock
i.e. how existence imperilled,
now more grateful than ever

toward life, liberty and
pursuit of happiness,
this in essence potential miracle
of sorts presenting possibility
cosmic creative force continually near.

CJ'S TIRE & AUTOMOTIVE,
(1405 South Township Line Road,
Royersford, Pennsylvania 19468)
intuition doth agree

expert knowledgeable SERVICE
familiar personnel employee
since patronizing said facility
(actually franchise sites
scattered across United States), we

regularly return taking car repeatedly
to team of mainly younger,
but wiser technicians than me,
who realizes scant knowledge, née
absolute zero mechanical ability,

especially regarding
twenty first century vehicles
heavily accoutered
with sophisticated technology.

Now yours truly loops
back to (house at Pooh corner -
think Loggins and Messina)
i.e. core theme
Impossible explanation within
the infinite universe scheme
to explain convincingly fluke

protection against meme
evoking death, demise, destruction,
et cetera regarding as ye gleam
teetotaler who avoids Jim Beam
plus alcohol in general, cuz
prescription medication harmful
unless feeling suicidal to thee extreme.

Thus one garden variety, generic guy
NON GMO android (ha)
he doth not fear
the grim reaper at rapier
or gunpoint, nor mortality do I despair
hoop fully made somewhat crystal clear,
a quandary (one among many

that recurred), whereby air
ring professed nihilistically
skeptical minus impulse to destroy
comprises whether doubting Thomas
(English Muffins) stance
on wing and prayer
inadequate, obsolete, untenable...
(neither defamation, nor blasphemy meant, sans Title)

Despite ingestion of
     anti anxiety medications
     ferocious hellish onslaught
     pummels me aback
finds resurgence of ghostly
     white implacable terror
inducing panic attack
cogs and wheels

of psyche frenetically
spinning alas and alack
swallowed in the un
avoid doubleheader maw
whale size amberjack
suctioned alive as dead ringer
     human master bait
     (feebly prate who GOD,

     somebody please HELP)
     doomed to die, "eye"
     doth entirely engulf me
     far worse than being slammed
     by malevolent forces
     loosed from hurricane
     classed as Category 5
on Saffir-Simpson Scale

     adrip with horrible gastric,
caustic, and acidic repulsive
bile alcoholic akin to applejack
and more rancid
than Q8 oily arrack
once again oft repeated phrase
     Death be not Proud, viz
     reincarnation of Moby ****

     (gone terribly awry)
on the attack after ME
with no way back
to house at Pooh Corner
     condemned to spin
willfully intestate,
while steeped in utter black
but....methinks

perhaps fetid blowback
equivalent to volcanic belch, would
     spit out "burnt offerings"
     formerly Matthew Scott Harris,
     whose steaming hot pipe dream
(Ahab) in mind can not
even get "LIVE" feedback,
and definite never

my Stradivarius fiddleback
(I rue...all the money
    momma's and pappa's...
scrimped and saved
     without giving
this sole sun any flack)...
ha...sardonic humor,
and wistful pointless flashback

equally frivolous hanker
ring for greenback,
legal tender, quid
     pro quo, et cetera,
NOW demise welcomed
     forever free from penury
small potatoes this measly mortal
even at dirt poor cheap

     expense courtesy
     Euthanasia travel agency
manned by HiJack,
where captain! My captain!

     Humungous humpback
clearly presented danger field,
     and only costs this one life
     as lil bitty chewy Whitman snack!
Donald Trump, Lemony Snicket, Askew
bee Doo, plus knowledgeable Jiminy Cricket,
all reliable, trustworthy sources, who
would never misinform gullible traveler
I know time to lather up
with poetic shampoo

so don't you dare ballyhoo
moost likely known
to garden variety wahoo
(When You Wish Upon a Star goo
whee lyrics aside...), particularly
following feedback haint "FAKE,"

just like this tattoo
on each posterior cheek
helping move doo doo
i.e. private business,
anyway pardon loo
*** wordplay, now lemme continue

though ye would would
much prefer I bid thee adieu,
ham back from the house of Pooh
ready with toilet trees
to vend off voodoo
intending to remain forthright to

finish explaining courtesy
regarding resultant google Moo
choe reputable homepage
search query... hallooo
thankfully helped rescue
me bogged down in Waterloo
curious about... any clue?

Yepper, what sound
do crickets make?
plus other esoteric tidbits to slake
thirst for aspiring entomologist
(may even know gossip where ache
key breaky hearts quake
'bout Josh and Drake)

yielded plethora web newpages
mainly concerning former,
whereat bottom cricket
wing covered teeth-
like ridges make

rough surface, and upper surface
of infinitesimal gliding anatomical feature
functions like scraper, hence rubbing
respective parts together doth create
chirping (“stridulating") soundcloud.
(warning ungapatchka language ahead)

Hence plead ding for
Mary Poppins wannabe
with snap of her fingers
can affect ship shape
tidiness, which task
needed before May 2022
when yearly inspection
indeed takes place.

Flush with rage the spouse
will become allied
if reference made
how she buzzfeeds disorder
altercation especially likely
if divorce blurted
making me wish
to experience (immediately)
bartered bride, when mine
pointed finger doth
nonverbally chide
markedly appalling untidy
predilection she blithely
exhibits woeful scant
interest to maintain
can-do spirit affecting plea

zing aesthetic humble abode
ofttimes slacking
off cleaning trail
of abomination, which talent
includes unwittingly cultivating
qua primordial
soup possibly
duplicating conditions when life
originated (bajillion years ago)
on planet Earth
witnessed courtesy think
gummy, groovy, gooey,
gloppy, (nippy, nap, noopy)
protoplasmic slimy
oozing blob (starring
Steve McQueen) amoeba

like swallowing small towns
with names such as
Chester Springs, Downingtown,
Phoenixville, & Royersford
hungering, hinting, and hankering
to hasten home hearing
Harris harridan hooligan
hoopla conniption purportedly
linked into order
issued courtesy board of health
for hen pecking
wife to hustle &
make house beautiful for Biden
(accompanied with hit parade)
announcing (yea)

at long last Republican
administration overhaul
which fête yours truly slated
to host determined
(weeks ago), thus
necessitating legally wedded
counterpart to apply
elbow grease in tandem
to render **** & span
where unsightly food scraps,
soiled clothes, scattered papers,
et cetera strewn
helter skelter, the disarray
the culmination of 4+
years occupying these digs
in Schwenksville, Pa.

Upon being told
"get the place in ship shape order"
she went ballistic like bupkis
fired out me gluteus
maximus, (whereat
I couldn't help but think ICBM)
yea, an incongruous thought
as she rattled vitriolic,
colorful expletives
coarse language enough would
make sailor blush
shutting his yapper uttering before
he even uttered
"shiver me timbers," hence clatter
and din created cacophonous
noise as my fair lady

affected one woman
siege warfare as pots and pans
flew pell mell thru air
while I took refuge in fallout
shelter unused since
total mortal kombat destroyed
major swath of webbed
wide world, global debacle
our dear leader triggered
(when in pensive mood) he
lobbed weapons of
mass destruction after being axed
to "go back home" meaning
his mother planet Uranus.
156 · May 2019
Driving Thru Rat Race Maze
I ain't gonna brag, boast, blab...,
lest yours truly suffers demise from backstab,
resignedly taking wheel of our automobile
donning, (but NOT trumpeting)
role as taxi cab

shuttling the missus, (she effusively glad)
to medical appointment
me, the obliging husband
in order for this mister former cad,
debt, now an ordinary dude dad,

who upon snaking, crab
like sighing, shimmying, scooching...
thru bumper to (rubber
baby buggy) bumper drab
morning commute, which

snail's pace spurred shoutout, via ab
dom men null controlled app    
designed by A. Habb,
which homonym identical
sound of descendent, sans faint jab,

asper fictitious Capt'n of Pequod
at sea vis a vis
if forced to ****** macadam landgrab
all the while aye spent gab
bing maintaining mindful outlook

for aggressive drivers,
whose cold icy stare
felt akin to painful jab
methought best not to "flip the bird"
subsequently get rushed

to emergency medical lab
avoided, cuz aye hapt tubby vigilant
for brazen drivers, plus additionally
keeping keen eye for police ready to nab
speed demons (mailer or female) even nawab

receiving citation for traffic infraction
and if repeat offender send to rehab
with license revoked,
nonetheless a slight stab
of anxiety as appointment time elapsed

indicated by built in digital clock
no matter arriving after 7:45 am time
my de facto role as chauffeur,
the wife would disfrock,
but fortunately excuse, sans gridlock

did not necessitate need
us to return at later date, thus no knock
kin wind out figurative sails, hence
circumstance did not
find me laughingstock,

thus any consideration, asper myself
resorting to quaffing hemlock
unnecessary honorable sacrifice,
that versus engaging in lethal warlock
additionally compromising private uber
to give spouse coveted lyft.
(if alive...though way up in years,
the cherished divine endearing gent,
would nonetheless captivate ears
of all colors with hearty, gracious cheers,
yet though long since gone to dust,
his posthumous belated birthday still registers blares.)

Two score and eleven years ago come
April fourth, two thousand nineteen
father of civil rights movement the,
Reverend Martin Luther King Junior honored
as benevolent demigod figure to the

oppressed African American population
without whose bold risks and subsequent
assassination April fourth
ninety sixty eight at the hands of a crazed
gunman (James Earl Ray),  

wrought empowerment advancing dreams
of slaves recent descendents
allowing, enabling and providing
once attainable aspirations
only bestowed upon the self anointed

masters and early settlers
of the virginal North
American contiguous land mass
yet…generations prior to this
prestigious public personality

Abolitionists pitted themselves against
the institution of slavery
incrementally raising awareness
per the abomination
forced servitude incurred

on those shackled
thus setting the stage for this
grandson of A.D. Williams,
a rural parsonage, who
ministered spiritual support

for the small congregation
(initially only thirteen members)
comprising attendants at Ebenezer Baptist
Church in Atlanta Georgia
setting precedent for freedom

(at risk of life and limb)
against scourge of
racial prejudice courtesy
of sharecropper grand parents
whose objection to racial segregation based

on an affront to the will of God
whereby the young
whip smart precocious lad,
(whose impact we now memorialize)
showed his true colorful promise,

when a young student at
Liberal Crozer Theological Seminary
in Chester, Pennsylvania
where the yet uncrowned eminent King
came under the influence

of theologian Reinhold
Niebuhr, a classmate
of his father's at Morehouse College
who became a mentor
by exposing his protégée

to liberal views of theology
planting the seeds of ardent
activism that gave rise to
The Southern Christian
Leadership Conference (SCLC)

an initial platform hoisting his status as
thee most articulate orator
spelling binding the listeners
with his soaring metaphors
about his emphatic march

to a promised land
where all men/women
could be brothers/sisters
and no person will be judged
by the color of his/her skin
raising morale of many dirt poor ebony
(and lighter skin toned) masses
to feel a glimmer of hope!
Analogous to black box
holding untold secrets,
I share the following self
introspection with ye,
which purported hidden truths
might set me free,
albeit laborious effort

to loose constituent amalgamated
compound elements unmined
tantamount to agony
riddling psyche effort to extract
thorny matters incumbent upon me
versus tapping Androcles and the lion
think Roman mythology.

Oftimes methinks... whoami
spending scores of years
with frustrated sigh
hermetically sealing body electric
housing generic garden variety guy
severely emotionally tormented
contemplating, integrating,
blithely urging wish to die

even at this moment,
yet reluctantly shy
away to embrace death wholeheartedly,
nor would I try
putting anonymous life (mine)
on the line, though...
nonetheless envisioning rejoicing
(as told to significant other -

the missus naturally averse
to my demise well nigh)
without ability to explain why
per se if mortal ailment
truncated mein kampf
Noel cowardly lie,
cuz becoming gratefully dead try
not to laugh while

yours truly cannot deny
permanent absence twill recognize
hard skool of knocks alumni
posthumously make his name linked with
hallowed as if that martyred,
though the feted occasion
beholds mine scattered
cremated ashes carried,

loosed, whisked... to sky
will not require men to don black tie,
nor mourn angst peppered soul,
no longer will any banshee cry
all quiet on western front forever reunify
me with cosmic consciousness eternal ally.
Bonafide catatonic doggedness,
nevertheless this stubborn stoic poet writ
afore and another feeble effort courtesy
exhaustive mental effort
he brewed den - brought about divine visit
analogously to solve mystery pinpointing
within suspense unveiling whodunnit.

Whereat your true
plane vanilla author's creativity
admittedly drastically did decline
bawling and crying
caterwauling putting any feline,
to shame, hence abandoned grandiose design,
cuz he suddenly contracted

(think fabricates)... what else
flesh eating bacteria unfavorable sign
finding me body stone cold supine
(courtesy brainstorm that went awry)
inducing purgatory nauseating
sensation to *****,
nope not at all feeling fine,

hence literary dream subsequently mine
ambition tanking (think
kamikaze nose diving
minus parachute life line),
sought spiritual guidance ministered
severe existential nihilist crisis
(an understatement)... zip,

absolute zero, and nein
never to witness, nor
restored vigor and vitality,
(sob... sob... sob) ha how asinine,
hence garden variety germane pine
wood coffin evidenced
resembling somber funereal yahrzeit

(/ˈyärˌtsīt,ˈyôr-/) recollecting late mother
helped beget kith and kin of mine,
than as now buzzfeeding appetites decline
possibly courtesy bloodily splattered
white laboratory coated
donned Victor Frankenstein
mister monster master's

repurposed cadaver delivers kosher eats
fancy feast grubhub groaning
outsize maître d' makes beeline,
nsync with anonymous canine,
corps speedier than any airline,
unbeknownst to yours truly posthumous
fame will inevitably yield moonshine.

Fast forward approximately
twelve hours later recuperated -
aide de camp resolved impasse with
partial writer's block slayed
attempting to continue quasi theme
i.e. avoid typing with fingers delayed,
albeit no matter unconscious

editing automatically peremptorily made
suppressing crude, fiery, ignominious tamed
loathsome offal rot earning F grade
securely unceremoniously waylaid
lurid outburst blandly diluted into staide
yawningly tedious figurative walled barricade,
when lo and behold atavistic beast erupts

fresh sortie attempts peppering enfilade
anew ideally unadulterated, unedited,
unexpurgated material ought be displayed
to allow, enable, and
provide raw emotional blackest shade
to resonate within mind
of unsuspecting reader,

who might take
objection with primitive grade
communication, and blatant
scathing writer somewhat afraid
to air unrefined sentiments
may cost popularity,
uncontested where cadre of

unseen followers thence evade
once popular rising star,
whose emergent fame
(even if only limited edition
to cyberspace) will fade,
yet methinks loosing
stream of consciousness obeyed

fealty on one metrical foot
metaphorically uncorking
deep seated primal angst laid
bare like bleached bones
existential crisis oft times
gussied up to avoid tirade,

whereby woke parlayed
gut wrenching splenetic self degrade
ding soul bearing vile eruption
considerably quieted, stoppered, tamped...
courtesy linkedin, symbiotic maid.
155 · Nov 2018
My Treatment Plan
Electroconvulsive therapy,
     a last ditch avail
able effort optioned, aye bewail
as desperation if standard
     psychological measures peter

     out leave ving paul tree
(paltry) choice, and blackmail
ling Doctor Frankenstein
     out of the question, cuz
     accidental discover re:

     visa vis could yield (ahem) grave
     zero APR, hence bad
     (bon jovian) medicine
     sought as precautionary
     measure to countervail

undesirable repercussions
     hoop fully curtail
ling any unexpected derail
ment, thus every nitty gritty detail,
asper my treatment plan

made purposely intractable
courtesy Matthew Scott Harris,
     to flummox decrypting
     this daunting task, whose
     hair brained scheme didst entail

hatching with Sam I am
    (of Doctor Zeus fame)...Oh...My...G_
egg gads no fail-
safe recourse, should shell shock
     Electroconvulsive – formerly electric shock

     therapy even slip an infinitesimal jot
     offsetting requisite
     exactly predicted results
     yes, even if precision errs
     by a mere clipped fingernail...

the sought after outcome
     (devised on the fly - by night
     Reddit writer above named author)
must absolutely dovetail
     with The Elements of Style

or very close
     facsimile thereof, anyway
strict requirements quality controlled
     with results tubby
     sent as email

to Strunk and White,
     who will flail
like some GMO gone awry
     (if patient accidentally electrocuted)
     finding them to become

     instantaneously petrified and frail
looking analogous to
     witnessing the Holy Grail
shattering into a bajillion pieces,
     whereby the heavens,

     would reign hail
scaring every last man,
     woman, and child to hightail
donned in heavy duty boots
     studded with many a hobnail

with duff feet, sans long arm of
     law and order on their heels,
     and if any scapegoats nabbed
     definitely consigned to jail
without chance of parole to prevail

no matter guilty might sail
to some tropical island awash
     with countless carbon copies
     of Euell Gibbons doppelganger,
and Swiss Alpine like mountains to scale.
Automobile prohibitive maintenance costs
pitches me pitifully begging for alms
lamenting dog forsaken
melon collie unpleasant circumstances
pleading with outstretched palms
disgraced to beg, perhaps donate
major ***** and/or entire body

to ease vehicular qualms
aha... methinks the missus could pose
as ventriloquist after mortician embalms
these lovely bones, but, hmm...
even then post mortem
agitation most likely becalms...

Straitjacketed impasse finds
yours truly going for broke
to nurse our 2009 Hyundai Sonata,
which monetary outlay doth yoke
mine fate heading, née accelerating
at ever increasing speed

emitting plume of smoke
which thick noxious exhaust
would immediately choke
any innocent wheel chaired,
or ambulatory pedestrian,
bicyclist (think Chernobyl),
a nightmare that did woke.

Mein kampf reduced between
a rock and hard place
analogous to trapped betwixt
Scylla and Charybdis
inadequate funds to purchase

newer preowned car,
nor paltry monies to erase
utter nightmare, yes
father did spring me
unexpected mullah, yet

the near future will menace
this dirt poor aging baby boomer,
and his moderately significant other,
she too needs more than solace
lacking gainful employment and

financial resources, maybe brazen
to broadcast such
amidst digital populace
such tsuris (Yiddish meaning
trouble or woe; aggravation)...

Just letting of figurative steam
emblematic of this easily
intimidated fellow with decent
original (long "e") meme
all throughout his life shouldered,

or voluntarily stationed to sidelines
courtesy crème de la crème
topnotch competitors within
human race attain the
supposed "American dream"

or similar facsimile thereof
finding one fool on the hill
gagging at extreme
pauperism, yes mainly linkedin
to series of unfortunate events

(Lemony Snicket would ogle,
envy chiefly hanker ring)
hashtagging me more supreme
regarding amassing adversity.

Thank you stranger near or afar
understanding how or why
Sylvia Plath crafted The Bell Jar
a cult classic, I would never
attempt to duplicate, my par

for the course literary contribution
might... humph earn me one lone star
if ever dabblings in scratching
out feeble efforts courtesy this word Tsar.
Acuity absent amidst domestic turmoil,
passage of time nsync with diminished
pitched family emotional battles relieves
blinded insight allowing, enabling, and
providing painful awareness incumbent

to mourn the absent paternal maturity, I
reach out with genuine non petty heart
ache aware impact loosed mismanaging
attentive can never be expunged, nor can
yours truly (me) affect diminished rancor

quite understandable, cuz anger gypping
healthy development (body, mind, spirit
triage) during majority, viz mein kampf
i.e. permanent arrested maturation leaves
papa experiencing grievous sadness plus

mixed grabbag (no, NOT plastic) comp
wry zing livid rage, how mine existence
bereft of untested discomfort compounded
courtesy extreme introvertedness linkedin
with immense anxiety, minus self esteem,

self acceptance, et cetera, where torturous
mindset difficult to comprehend decades
removed, when innocent naiveté cleaved
childhood's end aborting short lived bliss,
where loving parents birthed this offspring

neurologically riddled with devastating hear
owing, lacerating...psychologically blistering
pain reflexively found withdrawal into shell
totally detached where human league, family,
of origin, classmates...seemed bajillion miles

away alone within minecrafted bitterly cold
wilderness not accessible by father, mother,
sisters, and then later progeny and spouse,
hermetically sealing myself totally risk averse
to interact, thus invariably penalizing capacity

against growth unwittingly truncating, stemming,
rooting behavior – imprisoned labyrinth castout
never feeling important, especially during early
boyhood, adolescence, young adulthood, and
retrospectively deeming garden variety generic

lad ill equipped to cope with ordinary everyday
circumstances (as grown ascribing unfortunate
series of events) to biochemical and physical
anomalies (most binary non visible) exhibiting apathy
during formative stages deeming life arduous

ordeal, thus self resignation toward attaining
nothing short of failure reinforced with abysmal
academic and employment track record, where
death be not proud donned and trumpeted as
anorexia nervosa inflicting permanent irrevocable

harm even till this very moment dumbly smarting
as more or less solitary, lone wolf dissociated
concerning emasculation, isolation, liberation
never joining the thick of hoopla - deathly off
frayed rejection would slap me upside the head

aloofness inadmissible begetting offspring whose
needs and wants ******* selfishness, thus...
no deliberate intent to wreak havoc upon deux
daughters, the eldest bearing brunt of fallout
while agonizingly struggling - loathe to accept
mental, physical, spiritual deficiencies.
Tuesday, June twenty first
at 5:13 Ante Meridian
Eastern standard time
will find Earth's North Pole tilted
closest toward sun. This demarcates

most daylight hours of the year for
people living the northern hemisphere.
Just shy of high noon sun (less than
twelve hours from drafting these lines)
nearest star in solar system reaches
highest point in the sky.

Hence hasty intent to beat buzzer sound
dashing off riding figurative one seahorse
open sleigh madly awk cross cyber sea,
aye rudder sally forth (slogging thru
virtual flotsam and jetsam) with poetic

obeisance paid to average size ball of
Earth, wind and fire, my out of this
world quasi stellar benediction, since
Earthlings traveled thru space/time
continuum circa complimenting
summer solstice at Stonehenge
when the sky is clear, the sun rises
behind the Heel stone, the ancient entrance
to the circle, and rays of sunlight channelled
into the centre of the monument.

Perchance bajillion years ago, when predecessors
of present day primates (**** sitter terribly
less a bomb bin hubble), versus twenty first
century **** sapiens predilection for total
mortal kombat graphically spiraling downward

zeroing (kamikaze like), analogy drawn,
viz subjective mathematical roulette curves,
albeit hypotrochoids and epitrochoids staining
countless grains of sand, count them yourself,
yielding result (somewhere very loosely
approximating 7.5 x 1018, or seven quintillion,
five hundred quadrillion grains.

Such minutiae less significant within the realm
of present day **** sapiens, whose lives less
linkedin with phenomena affecting life on this
oblate spheroid, (which could come to a crashing
halt predicated on burgeoning human population
jeopardizing sustainable planet presuming
industrial paradigm prevails, thence man/
woman kind will unwittingly trumpet, and
or sound claxon (ex post facto), while
warming temperatures melt glaciers,

asper huge popsicles drowning
multitudinous habitats courtesy of
violent meteorologic cataclysms, where
Noah ark will be big enough to save majority

of creatures, and (wherein no art of the deal)
savvy enough to wall off sky high tidal
Katrina and the waves, then nature will (make
a killing) relishing tidying Atlas sized tureen

if necessary applying pledged finishing touches
repurposing third rock for another species slated
to inherit pseudo tabula rasa after Campbells,
and broth hers detox polluted primordial soup
i.e. once cleansed of poisons, thus...I condense
my Green New Deal spiel!

Midwinter night dream filled
with balm of June solstice rays
lackadaisical and carefree months ideal time
to while away pronounced illuminated days
outdoor sports a favorite choice
occupies athletic population
which venues witness frequent surge
and spill of overtime plays
another popular milieu
favorable climate awakens
constitutes habitués vacationers visit
ashore popular waterways
beachfront shoreline inundated
by mass exodus of sun worshippers
tidal seaboard awash
along every square inch
human species splashes to keep cool
within ocean and bays.

Six months ago bitter cold
and dark snow filled skies
wrought undeserved vengeance
viewed from these eyes
who after each and
every major winter storm
donned proper attire
to stay warm outside
while clearing walkway
with shovel in hand
executed repetitive motion
akin to how boater plies
similar (yet reversed)
****** swing of arms
now readily prepares for execution
of most difficult seasonal task
requires usage of most complex muscle
the source of poetry witty and wise.

Awake to the solar celestial sea chant
mourning regarding species no longer extant
thus upon figurative shoulders of youth
tasked with survival of humanity
a behemoth nearly impossible mission
younger generations unfairly saddled
with obligatory filched grant
courtesy when fossil fuels
broadcast onset of four Industrial Revolutions
spewing paradigm viz free market capitalist kant
now quashing, thrashing, wrestling against rant
long fostering **** sapiens dominance.

Starry-eyed dark matter
of infinite space
espied by countless eons
since original human race
became cognizant of her/
his terrestrial place
gilding the heavens with strings
of pearly hued lace
closer to earth charting
early skywatchers to notice moon face
held captive via gravitational brace
while zodiac archer aims
cocked bow, where knocked feathers
sans arrow complete an awesome
fantastic bullseye ace.

Mother nature’s ornery primates supreme display
said massive breastworks broadcast inlay
feat of awesome accomplishment
finds yours truly humbled okay
with his feeble limitations
engendering ample rocky tsuris oy vey.
Grisly horror jawbones Kristallnacht
totalitarian brandishes, flaunts, launches
global threat half cocked.

Vladimir Putin itching
to loose nuclear bomb
end of the world scenario ofttimes
iterated throughout history
though an atheist (actually Unitarian),
no doubt this, that or another psalm
countless times the Bible
references Armageddon and doomsday
impossible mission to remain
cool, collected and calm.

Whether affiliated with donkey or elephant
Democrat or Republican viz
blue war red respectively
political hot issues don't amount
to a (Sam) hill of beans
when Sword of Damocles count
approaches zero hour
as global tensions mount

signaling increased chance
trigger finger will free
avast nuclear winter
(across world wide web) re:
leasing plethora, pyrocumulus
mushroom clouds tree

mend us planetary explosions
annihilating webbed wide
world, an irrevocable
indeed earthlinked debacle
spelling widespread species
multitudinous extinction
ex post de facto after super
bowling powers (wannabe) vied

to wrest empowerment spanning
entire realm sans third rock
from the father, sun and holy ghost,
who turned substantial pockets
of flora and fauna
once populating oblate spheroid ad hoc
significant swaths of life forms
pulverized and/or turned to ash
transformed into radioactive wasteland
giving T.S. Eliot a run for his money
after war mongers brash
lee usurped hegemony
(ruling inhabitants
of Gaia with an iron fist
with a smidgen of flavoring
courtesy of Missus Dash

superfluous taste enhancer,
when sibling burnt offering views
between Venus and Mars incendiary
tolled mourning news
smithereens sole remnant
poisoned every square inch
from weapon of mass destruction

that did cruise
engendering thick noxious fog
disabling fox but not cockroach
while smoldering seas and continents

skull and crossbones didst poach
amidst the gasified, liquified, pureed
where holographic ghoulish super bowl coach

rendering lifelessness home for menagerie
where virtue trounced vice as organisms
(particularly one primate) didst try
(predominant 21st century simians)
tool heave with amity, comity, and empathy
animals and plants an experiment
that went awry

presaging a nuclear winter with nary a winner
implicating mankind as the absolute sinner
instantaneously after Doomsday Clock
signaled point of no return
where grim reaper the sole grinner
feasting on human flesh for dinner.
After experiencing a severe,
albeit violent near lethal bout
of irritable bowel syndrome
(yesterday night August 30th, 2023)
triggered courtesy dulcolax caplets plus
healthy portion of lentils,
I (a beatle browed, foo fighting,
night ranger needing nirvana)
imperiled me to twist and shout
as a whirling dervish analogous
to F5 tornado bread a deep purple
to kiss earth, wind and fire
hopscotching across terrestrial plain.

Irritable bowel syndrome
in my pinion wracked
lower abdominal area (mine)
bubbled, gurgled and ballooned
sub stomach gastrointestinal tract
vis a vis flatulence crooned
in tandem with subsequent expulsion
explosively eliminated ***** waste
witnessed this scribe forcibly
zipping, sprinting, jetting to bathroom,

self propulsion (a race against time)
nsync with contraction of sphincter muscles'
spasmodically, desperately braced
body electric of mine hurled
at light speed across the universe
courtesy unpleasant symptoms
that mimicked anxiety/ panic attack,
which tortuousness, odorousness, insidiousness,
horrendousness, gaseousness, arduousness...
played mean game of (gastrointestinal
knick knack paddywhack havoc.

Ofttimes in the past
irritable bowel syndrome
affrighted, afflicted, and affected me,
hence yours truly no stranger
to making light of offal plight
and even managing to craft poem
else my alias not mister rhyme stir,
who found himself held hostage
self barricaded in the water closet,
where thoughts about mooning

did not crack a smile,
more explicitly baring derriere
tubby more exact
humor did little to cheer me up -
matter of fact
no source of laughter manifested,
(despite usual presence of chuckles
from this fan of good humor) hijacked
for what seemed a maternity leave
from all mothers tub be

thus envision, a bevy of pregnant gals
aching with cramps heave
ving (times square of the hippopotamus)
with ****** fully dilated key
ping alert, when mother nature ready
to pull out all stops (via umbilical cord)
to deliver bundle of joy followed
in quick succession with after birth re:
placental sack, hence
said effort to expel newborn

the closest scenario
experienced ill suited
to Saint Vitus dance
afflicting this anxiety prone
lovely bones, an all expense
paid (seat of the pants)
accursed bane of proletariat grants
no truce to attend
found me pampered doubled over stance.

Modus operandi to distract
against acute pain crisis
yielded impossible mission
exhibited courtesy haphazard poem  
awaiting unsolicited feedback
across rock of ages woke
beguiling ghostly ***** spectre
courtesy Marie-Antoinette,
(i.e. bride of France's arty choke
King Louis XVI) bespoke

let him eat cake, and (sic)
send back the ****** bloke,
aye suddenly begot idea rye
Jack Corner of zee desk
didst impale and provoke
moderately painful injury
right side rib cage
analogous to intriguing
unfortunate circumstance
mysterious secret shrouded

as dagger and cloak
(think Alfred E. Neuman,
viz MAD Magazine), yes no joke
lovely bones of me body electric,
(particularly right side rib cage)
severely traumatized, nailed, injured...
crucified oft told umteen times,
yet omitting key mirrors and smoke,
significant Dorian Gray parallel,
when former antique,

viz secrétaire looking glass reflection,
spider hairline fractures radiated
resembled bay of pigs in a poke
ham handedly oinked,
quaked, shattered... broke
into bajillion pieces
deafening, exploding,
glowering thunder stroke
jagged shrapnel size shards
unleashed cosmic force
lacerated, gnashed, beribboned...

impeaching flesh with
one engulfed masterstroke,
no rhyme nor reason aiming to choke
off promising poet (ha) of corpse
resembling scrambled egg yolk
posthumous fame besmoke
salvaged mine besmirched reputation
courtesy humble cartoon character
bugs bunny and kinfolk spoke
daffy fully goofily
eulogizing humor did evoke.
Momma mia man date
comb the second Sunday
during month of May
can be traced back
to ancient Greeks and Romans
devotional festivals held
to honor mother goddesses Rhea and Cybele
setting precedent for Mother's Day
where early Christians fancied festival
known as “Mothering Sunday.”

Fast forward to the early
twentieth century 1908 when
Ann Maria Reeves Jarvis
(a social activist then,
and community organizer
during American Civil War) era to quieten
grief fraught era also cited
as informally memorializing her mother,
who begot said noble men
touring daughter

paying homage to woebegone
lachrymose role with accolades
to endure tragedy and loss put upon
childbearing women,
this event held (rain or sun)
at St Andrew's Methodist Church
in Grafton, West Virginia, which did quicken
in subsequent decades to formal fete,
where poets (like me) did open
the special occasion with ranked midshipmen

commercialization cropped as ken
be expected by the early 1920's imbolden
greeting card companies
such as Hallmark generated a market
(money making of course) even
though Jarvis believed
companies sought profit
NOT prophet, thus misinterpreting
and exploiting idea
of Mother's Day and met

aforementioned founder, who tried to jet
tis sin the ****** appetite
of the ole mighty dollar,
but her lofty ambition did get
thwarted by mass marketing
the quaint idea,
plus she feared going in debt
and though the industry
(initially proposed entailed low key
acknowledgement, the originator

(Ann Marie Jarvis) still esteemed,
fêted, lionized, revered re:
formed unsanitary
squalid living conditions with zee
less ness and aplomb
set a course where
greater longevity doth hum
all because, she sought to regale mum
(mine) deceased after rigor mortis
immediately thereafter her sole son
found himself saddened severely glum,
and uncomfortably numb.
Axe the old Don, a trump peter n piper
   of incredulous hellish crud - be gone
ha air brushed pompous ****
   Sunkist in Macy's window

   then like a jackal hound, he doth run
after public outcry yelps
   for his hide leaving  
   proletarian discord re: pyrrhic victory won.

Donald Duck Trump ™$ - a pompous ***
makes war with his big brass
knuckles and bucket of crass
maligns vis a vis character assassination
   while kissing thing kith

   darting forked tongue sharp as bro kin glass
inciting banal deathly hallowed
   expletives toward lass
sees – especially Fox Television
   news anchor woman Megyn Kelly
(quite so many ill mannered indiscretions ago)

inducing said personality
   to bear the brunt of brutish mass
of vitriolic n vile insults sacrilegiously
   maliciously, noxiously, opprobiously

   incriminating, hellaciously,
   desecrating opportunistically as hiss oh ****
so…NO amp pull VOTE of confidence from me
(thus far ohm host halfway to 2020 election
   toward such a volt char quite rude, snooty
   arrogant simian with sass.

I van (terribly hard pressed)
   to describe while sitting on me ****
how he oh bomb in lee rages
   gnashing false teeth
   Wilma backside doth slump
still blasting Democratic nomination
   (pa hill a reed) as sham –

from special interest bro and sis turn pump
he, the epitome of
   crass bloviation, a malignant lump
whose rants,
   sans presidential outcome a sham bull
with his millions beds this,

that and another woman to ******* jump
disseminating gene pool
   birthing more Quakers
   and additionally doth ****
the mass media as some foolhardy charade

and caricature of a frazzled grump
this arboreal clothed ape erected Taj Mahal
   ******* symbol, where players dump
and gamble away hard earn cash

for his kitty, as if that cachet
   to grind and bump
lambasting with maniacal
   like "Stormy Dan" yells

   leering oafish ill pout
   while hair ***
   (of red follicular) bulls ad hocks
atop his bulbous aerosol sprayed locks
resemble a flock
   of bronzed sea gulls mocks

heady measly shaped Muppet Ox
dis eased cranial hologram shocks
of a cretaceous, facetious tocks
(sic) exogenous, insidious, and obstreperous vox.
Forlorn; bereft of golden
(slippered) opportunities I weep;
Three score and four years
replete with mailer daemons,
hence mindset adrip
with self denouncing expletive filled bleep
unwritten expressed recriminations
wielded upon figurative head of wimpy blip;
decades elapsed at light speed clip
as the world turned days of mein kampf

exhibited slow psychologically
torturous analogous intravenous slow drip
during emerging adulthood
approximately half life of mine,
when yours truly painstakingly
besotted with unrequited love
accursed extreme introvertedness
severely hobbled coping ability
gifted at birth with congenital weakness
mama's boy lacked ways and means
integrating himself among peers,

no supportive services to equip
shy lonely lad devoid of fellowship
palmar hyperhidrosis affected slippery grip
in tandem with being diminutive
aiming to experience childhood's end forever
son of a gun flailed with dating later in life
compromising, forsaking, and issuing
counter productively undermining
potential heterosexual relationships
invariably shooting from the hip.

Eight different prescription medications
allow umpteen combinations to yield
against bombardment that fate doth wield
delivered, signed and sealed
courtesy the grim reaper
able, eager, ready and willing
to maneuver across pitted minefield
accessing exiled soul whisking same
to idyllic place named Edenfield.

Oftimes methinks how cessation to breathe
spirit buoyed aloft, where garlands wreath
to escape hell on Earth,
where neurosis and psychosis seethe
within mine sixty plus shades of gray matter
symbiotically flourishing at expense of sanity
case in point being:
anxiety/ panic attacks
obsessive compulsive behavior,
schizoid personality disorder,

long in the tooth fellow
his sustenance similar to pablum
constituting imperial diet of worms
of the Holy Roman Empire -
called by Emperor Charles V
fit for grown baby,
especially when removing dentures
cuz he must resort to eat soft foods
unless by some miracle I teethe
for the second time.

Homegrown destructive force
muscles, tussles, wrestles,
et cetera within me
likened to (but separate from) Intifada,
(thus no insinuation this wordsmith
linkedin to any militant group)
grips mine soul asylum,
a recalcitrant doppelganger
within windmills of my mind
doth insidiously, poisonously,
and unpleasantly drum
palpably affecting writer
of these words to feel glum.

No respite whether I repose
in deep slumber or lightly awake
inescapable melancholic woes
haunts these lonely bones,
whereby system of the down
houses reticent persona constituent feature
characterized courtesy anhedonia
linkedin with passive suicidal ideation
accentuated when severe crisis erupt
analogous to smoldering volcano.

Fortunate for me the missus keenly aware
plus (despite every now and again
contention between us),
she makes crystal clear
communicating her displeasure
mixed with genuine fear
bantering deadpanning facetiously
gallows humor I half heartedly asseverate
gibberish spouting jargoneer
gravely alarms wife helpless to orienteer

conversation away from my demise,
thus figuratively switch horses
in mid stream and jockey
to calm her down
and lightening verbal exchange
by ******* from the waist down
revealing laughing stock of skinny legs
(easily mistaken for spindleshanks)
poking thru underwear
charging on imaginary steed

feigning being loco
despite NOT smoking ****,
energetic cavorting courtesy
nursing high test coffee,
nevertheless ineffective battling fatigue
despite flitting to and fro,
hither and yon bumbling along
(skeletal) joints of mine smoking hot
suddenly after sipping strong brew,
I temporarily shuck off lethargy

long enough break to out dancing
while simultaneously overtaken
to sing a song of sixpence
while wings flutter at the speed of sound
buzzfeed appetite for consumption
Ecclesiastical History of the English People,
one of our best-written sources
for early English history
authored by Venerable Bede.
155 · Jul 2019
Paltry credit karma
Earned to date,
nee absolute zero
academic bankable bragging rites
explained arduous, horrendous, onerous
agonizing, heartbreaking,
nerve wracking travails

hamstringing, hijacking, hobbling...
maximization of potential
e'er since yours truly
begat when ma dada
fired off his johnny rotten *** pistol
handy dandy blues clues unsheathed

******* gun - lobbed more'n blanks
scoring bullseye pregnant truth
discovered ex post facto
yoked target with egg sealant aim
conceived coe idle upstanding ovation
fusion formed diploid
cell signifying zygote

activating, kickstarting, quickening
embryonic biological reproductive processes
intimating swell happening,
where linkedin rocketed payload
snookered triggered ultimately
yielded inchoate homunculus jackanapes

zapped out birth canal
ready for prime crying time
parturition players chemical romance loosed
yawping, writhing, tethering pipsqueak
full term newborn blasted,
the shocked monkey,

accompanied by archangel Peter Gabriel
trusty unnecessary dangling umbilical cord
obstetrician quickly severed
in utero air supply superfluous
initial gulps of oxygen
commenced fretful incessant laborious

ongoing ripsnorting unrelenting
said vicious trauma,
albeit begat courtesy
glommed deoxyribonucleic acid
mercilessly assailing psyche
metaphorically holding hostage

nee actually essentially cannibalizing
analogous to birthing simultaneous
diabolical identical twin doppelgänger
undermining since getco
proper holistic pursuits
evidenced when matriculating

learning fraught
shot thru with abysmal results
post high school
academic endeavors
evidenced by matriculation
without graduation incorporating

half dozen colleges/universities
earning measly grade point average
simultaneously accumulating
shoddy employment record
now saddled with unbridled

penuriousness - scratching out poetry
every now again
this brother grimm
writing endeavors feeble
becoming financially solvent.
Spurred by mother dearest
as well as other politesse
drummed into her second born
fobbing blandishments as incentive
tumbled off fingers of prodigal son
tripped wordsmith to splutter forth
forthwith the following lines.

Back in the day
quaint summertime of yore,
the following popular refrain reverberated
within hallowed halls of school.

"No more pencils,
no more books,
no more teacher's/
teachers' ***** looks”

Never did exotic vacations populate
those twelve weeks
when doors flung opened
at Henry Kline Boyer,
whence score years ago yours truly
now (June 8th, 2023)
approximately same age,
when mine paternal grandfather visited
me, and other members of family
at then Route Deliver #2
Collegeville, Pennsylvania,
the home of mein kampf.

Figurative eons ago
bygone innocent childhood of mine
oblivious to progressive political issues
easily delighted, liberated, tantalized...,
especially when Sunkist grandpa Harris
(Aaron) indulged yours truly
jais nais sais quois
kibitizing lovingly, mirthfully
naturally offering pleasing qualities,

surrendering slender tanned arms
where upon left wrist dangled his
venerated wristwatch (analog),
I ecstatically fingered, prized, and toyed
with said object fascinated
at the linkedin craftsmanship,
which yielded general squealing zealousness
from an ordinarily
non emotionally expressive lad.

This towheaded grandson,
extremely excited when me daddy's papa
came to this figurative rural outpost,
(despite his chastising behavior
ridiculing favorite progeny's children),
where traces of early twentieth century
still evident when manicured formal gardens
pegged, limned, harkened... back
to a supposedly simpler time

when this elderly family member
(who only completed eighth grade),
whose birth benchmarked, coincided
and demarcated with late
Industrial Revolution, whence
Philadelphia birthplace noisy with
horse drawn carriages competing
with early model automobiles
crowding thee busy thoroughfares,
where the streets have no name.

Lemme return back
to the previous topic,
and explain how
I felt eager to interact
with cranky, yet doting old man,
which showcased chained metal links
wore a temporary imprint
upon his bronzed aged skin – dog
head lee remaining
gently persuading him

to delay when departure time arrived
for favorite boyhood relative,
twas pure heavenly glory
conniving, finagling, inveigling...
our favorite grandfather
to situate myself on right side
and toy with the wristwatch (analog),
winning three way verbal tussle
between yours truly and two siblings
(an older and younger sister),

which when a kid
also exhibited glee at occasions
treasuring said older folk gave me a frog
tiled toy (sliding puzzle)
that required dexterity
moving pieces fastly secured,
which when complete
always left me agog
and this, that or
some other gewgaw, souvenir, trinket

(plus a bit of chump change given to me)
spurred mine late mum
to spark me mental cog
to say “good morning”, “good afternoon”,
“goodnight”, “thank you,”
or when eggnog proffered to this
most senior chronological guest,
who sat at the head of table,
or blankly watching television
like a bump on a log

while chided, forced, induced...
to parlay social graces
from this mere pollywog,
who (much as delight arose fussing
with trappings worn
loss on atrophied flesh),
a skittishness found me
averse to follow orders
as if I happened to be a petsmart dog.

At that time
Florida orange juiced industry
touted, popularized, and linked in
with Anita Bryant -
American singer, political activist,
known for anti-gay activism
and 1958 Miss Oklahoma
beauty pageant winner,
and a brand ambassador
from 1969 to 1980
for the Florida Citrus Commission.

Thee paternal grandfather
oft times visited our then rural abode
at that time one sturdy estate
(originally called Glen Elm)
wildlife twittered, jibber-jibber, crowed...
within the plush wooded tract
even then blueprints drawn up
land deeded, mapped, parceled,
and slated to explode;
our then eco-friendly family averse
to witness expanding commercialization

across wetlands horizons
(Canadian Geese flocked to pond,
which liquid haven courtesy Donald Nelson
got the plug pulled
and drained watery basin)
asthma late mum didst lament
misfortune of flora and fauna,
nevertheless chided me
against even thinking
about sabotaging property

after I played  devil's advocate to goad
conspiratorial natural forces
to undermine cookie cutter
look alike slap dashed, ticky tack
shoddy tinderboxes (vinyl city) growed
on formerly untamed, uber ****** woods,
perhaps early boondocks getaway hoed
and plowed, but indomitable
(naturally enshrined eminent domain
abandoned since pioneers

bushwhacked rustic habitations)
nature relished reversed
grape seeded tracery etched
yet 'pon reflection,
I ponder how early occupation knowed
no habitat foresaw wreckage
when decision via wealthy Leipers,
(original residents plus wealthy owners of
The Bell and Clapper)
unanimously custom made crafted mansion
actually originally a summer getaway.

Self imposed endeavor
to indulge drafting literary effort,
though methinks love's labor's lost
hunt and peck typing  
across qwerty keyboard
and captcha characteristics
unique to house of my boyhood,
whereby selecting alphanumeric
and/or special symbols  
instantaneously generate electronic signals
electronically communicating,
subsequently transmitting

byte size data packets description
to respective ip node
(to create document courtesy OpenOffice)
analogous how modus operandi
to build stately
sturdy summer country villa,
(circa early 1900's)
which property whittled down
to 324 Level Road demesne comprising
about a half dozen acres
eventually acquired by Boyce Harris
February 28th 1968 -

for x number of years mortgaged he towed,
a near singlehanded undertaking
to gentrify house as elements of style
witnessed once ship shape
wrought architectural structure
weathered, subjected to degradation,
naturally deteriorated
him (in vain) to enlist by force if need be
grunt laborious services of singular son
the author of these words,
who houses the ineradicable genes
and chromosomes of August Aaron.
154 · Mar 2019
Irreverent Hotheaded Grinch
(Any resemblance between said title,
as told tummy by ya finch,
and commander in chief,...
not accidental, nor a cinch
buttock hum posed on behalf

of these bottom ming out
fifty states, plus Puerto Rico inch
ching, donning, and clamoring
desperately for fluffin ***** pinch)
hitter to aright "FAKE"

government even a cameo by David Lynch,
would pilot ship of state with nary a flinch
bucking creative enterprise winch
cha ya know
as writ by this average Joe

brainstorms offbeat ideas
caw king like a black crow
boot probably relegated
to same fate as dodo
bird long extinct,

asper could also be woe
full destiny of this poe
whit (wannabe), plus aspirant
aiming, mulling, vying,
et cetera tubby
next presidential bozo

and thwart further ruses to hoodwink
by subterfuge, treachery, unethical...brink
man ship, Capital One citizen bankers
to re: captcha how to MAGA,
and avoid pitching country

slipping into behavioral sink,
which White House bumstead "FAKE"
golden blond dee antics even entice pink
panther to **** sitter entering 2020 elections
amidst what promises tubby hang nail biting,

knuckle cracking, hair pulling - each kink
Putin on brakes against
collusion, sans frightful - link
king voter bribery, disenfranchisement, fraud...

calling joint efforts of Captain Nemo,
Captain Kangaroo, Captain America...ink
kin, a pact (minus any imp) potent fink
power hungry, money grubbing, apprenticed
tan hatt man spinning wheel of misfortune

beady barren eyes that never blink
immodest, impertinent, impudent,
et cetera hyperlink
to flesh eating, debauchery,
bacchanalian web pages
kickstarting naked lunch high jink.
Dispense sing with fidelity blithely agog
just me and mine dark shadow
slinking along the edge of night doth blog
passivity, the path of least resistance ohm my dog,
shocking voltage surges an emphatic YES,
verboten fruit adrip with succulent juices as eggnog,
a legitimately valid reason and rhyme to flog
reprobate yours truly figuratively emasculate,
thee catchword to extricate
being emotionally hogtied
warrants immediate attention,
regarding consummating series
of prurient disadvantageous
née self destructive events.
  
The best idea to expound upon,
while attempting creative
exuding genital intonations to jog
all mein kampf, I felt like a bump on a log
please... don't be hesitant
not to reserve judgement
towards this miscreant husband
whom identifies himself
as a dirt Poe imp of the pervert
analogous to rumpelstiltskin fable

whereby Lothario wannabe
boasts stud deed fallaciousness,
whose noggin of mine shaped as an egghead
topped off with pinhead blocked nog,
one aging long haired pencil neck geek
never reached maturity forever a pollywog
until froggy went a courtin'
into marital quagmire
woody ******* did slog.

More clearly, plainly and succinctly,
one sniveling poor excuse for masculinity,
(and upstanding laughingstock
regarding spindleshanks),
I continually experience
unrepentant (unforgivable) humility,
hence lame justification
Matthew Scott Harris
sought adultery, cuckoldry, effrontery...,
which unwise choices attempted
(pun intended) to fill a void
****** propensity linkedin with precepts

attributed courtesy Sigmund Freud,
though skepticism skirted
shirked getting caught red handed
sneaky shenanigans employed
barenaked lady ******* psychoanalysis
downplayed, or Oedipus complex
shrugged off Fountainhead (heavier imposition
versus Atlas) fails to bridge
(do not as Kwai)
any heavy mettle alloyed
within me psyche, and windmills of my mind.

Handy dandy blues clues
existential mid life crisis
lacked absolute zero justification
why yours truly fraught
with hormonal secretion
embarked on warpath for concupiscence
gallivanting foot loose and fancy free
sabotaged matrimonial covenant,
whereby I regularly posted and answered
personal classified advertisement
with popular Craigslist website,
thus no surprise when presto digitation,
I met gal headquartered in Coatesville;

she drove to Evansburg State Park
rearing to tame bucking bronco (me)
quashing, invalidating, contravening...
conjugal contractual obligation
renting asunder mine vocalized vow
to remain faithful thru thick and/or thin
seeking alternative ******* opportunity
feeble minded excuse
regarding irreconcilable differences
a vague catchall phrase
antithetical contrary to pledged troth,
embarking on maiden voyage
nsync with barenaked lady
partaking moist and meaty tender vittles.

I feebly attempted to compensate  
for dearth of absent teenage
Ninja mutant turtles
reptile brain and brawn bravado
investigated dating app experiences,
thus violated wedded vow think tryst
I yearned, trended and jump/kick started
Casanova paramour wannabe
years later subsequently regretted philandering
utterly disgusted at my illicit behavior
and negligence neglecting
attentiveness to offspring and spouse
forswore doting upon then
high school age daughters,
rightfully thee eldest one

(born 12/22/1996) still ******
and compromised paternal priority spawning
selfish prurient dalliances,
I das scribe, how now brown cow objectionable
frolicking courtesy Sly And The Family Stone
payback a *****, cuz feel in funky (flunky) mood,
verses when scads of Earth orbitz ago,
he profusely kissed
mouth of other voluptuous
(zoftig) older women
(consensually, flatteringly, indiscriminately)
and amazingly, kindly, thankfully... enough
in due time spouse did willingly insist

to forgive, boot never forget
long since discounting divorce from wife
nevertheless, remaining thermally uncoupled
mandated unconditional armistice
eventually note hissed
matter of fact I dreamt
(earlier today May twenty ninth
two thousand and twenty two), the gist
regarding soldier of self made misfortune
toying and tinkering harming self
casually eyed sharp pointed objects
offered especial attraction

pondering hoop fully connive fist
(cuffed) around handles of cutlery
at primal, gonadal, and brutal predilections
now... finding very little reason to exist,
hence understandably dissed
(until death do me part)
unbridled love and apology
toward thee missus and progeny,
who forever did blacklist
writ blood ginned curse with barbs.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder,
thus very little paternal (filial) love expressed
and she chose to live yonder
Oakland, California her temporary dwelling
no matter, her papa blatantly confessed depravity
YES, more'n his eye did wonder.

At present petty coated junction
non petty irreparable schism
doth rank as horrendous
on par me adopting fascism
forever sullied image ("daddy's girl"),
who once thought the world of me
selfish misdeeds buzzfeeding swelling egoism
no more how enlightened I became

ex post facto, pure unconditional acceptance
refracted light risqué behavior thru prism
where primary parental accountability
not satisfactorily explained away courtesy
Darwinism (to con seed genes), nor chauvinism,
whereby ever since time immemorial
repentance will forever be belabored
by me flagrantly disregarding monogamy
courtesy hardened libido
making mockery and travesty marital covenant.
regarding previous literary endeavor
might shed insight about me.

Wick End Up Date, Snippet Sans...
...The Deadly Scourge  
...One Obsessive/Compulsive Disorder

(Never abating infiltrating
writing material e'en superceding
the death of John McCain, where
Munster monster rears gnashing
undermining marriage with ambivalence.
Anorexia nervosa absent bulimia
nadir of onset schizoid behavior,
which agonizingly slow suicide
self starvation maelstrom within

psyche of self prepubescent lad
(particularly devastating  
immediate family members)
emaciation pitted existential
ghastly revulsion unseen,
wuthering heights wrung death
knell annihilating fragile entity
christened Matthew Scott Harris

obvious preemtory imprimatur
yieldeing covalent bond to die starkly
horrified kith and kin helpless  
Zorro slashed signature profound
perilous depressive psychological gouge.
Now at about two plus score years
attaining centenarian rank perfect 20/20
hindsight supreme advantage swift under

currents alluded drowning, when das
scribe juiced started  to nibble puberty,
whence devastating emotional crisis
tripped, trilled, and tricked chronological
clock theorizing numerous educated
guesses within mindful middle progeny,
and sole son (of Boyce and late Harriet Harris),
why I willfully hurtled flesh at light speed

down abyss toward death. Literal and
physical lightness manifested within
nooks and crannies prior to full blown
symptoms to eliminate sustenance
drawing curtain on brief residence be
fore high noon of life. Metamorphosis
from boyhood into man found solace
attempting to keep at bay natural cycle,

which trans formation grieved me
pining nostalgic childhood’s end
(one fraught with romanticism)
vengefully interpreted attempt to halt
deadly tracks intervention of mother,
whose nursing experience helped fend  
passive attempt promulgated silent

killer (suicide) wrought living corpse
fruition, while she whipped various
nutritious concoctions in blender
to ensure minimal essentials to, I
readily admit) famished body in con
junction with applying vital supple
mints into bony gluteus maximus,
thru fuel injection which submissiveness

to acquiesce, and bare buttocks did
absolutely nothing to squelch death wish.
I inexorably overcame eating disorder
deadly hunger strike essentially constituted
declaration of independent control
despite horrendous craving for food
jabbed innards like a pike bifurcated
psychic division  loosed, ousted, and

routed coeval grim reaper grippe
permanent goal lyeth drink seize abated
gnome hatter reminiscence blissful child
hood over flooded self made ****
revised engendering propensity
to catapult into abysmal emotional hole

before invention of Facebook, I
mentally clicked Like sparring sword
fight mailer daemons mortally wounded
slain, viz healthy development stole.

Imprimatur indelibly etched decades
after bout with passive exit from life
crimps ******/social skills plus
stunted physical growth butcher knife

cuts affected mental health with panic
attacks and anxiety though existence
considerably less riddled debilitating
symptoms (such as vertigo, racing heart,
profuse sweating, nausea, irritable bowels)
courtesy prescription medications.
Twas partly on account
of yours truly being incarnation of Samson;
spouse and I wed
please fate, don't say alopecia didst tread;
though atheist to higher power
yours truly pled
heart sank analogous
to plumbline made of lead
as each strand falls out of my head
without being replaced by another,
albeit veritable dead
cells comprised once luscious locks.

Futile effort to bemoan
underperforming hair follicles,
nevertheless I rank as just one
limey, measly, and nasally outlier,
(nevertheless able bodied, minded
and spirited wordsmith) doth dare
to express honest to dog distress;
Now tis lament to thinning hair,
yours truly doth beseech cosmic creator

donned as devil in disguise
rudely barging into
mine Scottish tartan matted lair
non-responsive to fervent prayer
revealing how mine paternal
genealogical trunk mane lion
whooshes like a red bull at lightspeed
vis a vis tempus fugit
galloping manic tear.

Early this year
gentle as calm ocean waters
lapping along a weir
thumb and forefinger
of right hand would peel back,
(via diagonally flipping motion
asper turning pages of calendar
representing father time
regarding personification and progression)
of fleeting seconds, minutes, days,...

gets flipped over to veer
in one direction (linear)
thy head immediately
lost hirsute thickness,
I starkly share and lament
those suffering male
or female pattern baldness,
and can't hope noticing
limp decreasing strands
intermixed with increasing

number of gray ones
sends shivers along small hairs of spine,
gloomy feeling linkedin
with old fashioned meaning of queer
really ambling along tragicomic stream,
he evinced how gargoyles mockingly leer
in conjunction dreams fraught
with frightful haunting monsters jeer
loosing sleep and kept raggedly awake
ring sound reverberating

hair splitting, jump/
kick starting decibel jamming
primary cranial gear
aye tell mice elf nothing to fear...,
yet maximizing this plight with poem 'ere
Yukon also temporarily part
blond, brown, gold,
et cetera locks mud dear
regarding inexplicable
rhyme without reason

invites compulsion, fixation, obsession...
why keratinous filament
growing out of the epidermis
(made of dead, keratinized cells)
matters so much, that one
unnamed garden variety generic
**** sapiens would
rather be dead than bald.
posited puzzling apt aperçu...

While pondering particular
theme to address
amidst tangled webbed mental skein
today November third
two thousand nineteen,

unexpected Möbius strip
tease conundrum unforeseen,
yet as avid aspiring scrivener
only now I became keen,
which theoretical, rhetorical,

philosophical... predicament
may not suddenly find me
flush with green
i.e. profuse legal tender,
but merely thought provoking

puzzlement addresses following quandary
stuck within gray matter of pate
impossible mission to differentiate
jagged fine line between
passion and obsession

case in point strong
affinity to write of late,
cuz yours truly susceptible
toward compulsion that doth not abate,
and mind boggling to wed healthy

love of language analogous as mate
nsync with psychological trait,
viz excessive compulsion
diagnosed years gone
by courtesy professional

mental health specialists, did annotate,
and I admit behavior impossible to satiate,
thus generating aforementioned query
how does one (me) segregate
productive interest versus excessive,
née fanatical all consuming - I narrate

oft times burning midnight oil
(albeit figurative alluded
to mister Arson Wells) witness
as logophile doth painstakingly toil
bajillion cerebral threads to uncoil,

whereby utilizing figurative tweezers
uprooting, untangling rhyme I embroil
(even using ****** Doo conditioner)
metaphorically beneath mine royal
hirsute (Scottish) matted topsoil

ultimately bringing in top gun
uncannily resembling gargoyle
shape shifting between pop eye
at lightspeed as if
greased with olive oyl
so watch out Bluto,
get ready for turmoil!
Futile lamentations reverberate along
corridors of times long gone, this papa
tearfully apologetic revisiting his base,
fitfully lachrymose torturing unrelenting
voluminous wrongs against thee dearest
precious daughter aware poetic/ prosaic

ministrations cannot substitute bonafide
nor ameliorate cumulative forsaken joys
requisite to bolster compromised delicate
innocence exhibited upon begetting deux
darling (wool worth more than fine spun
gold) healthily nurturing priceless progeny

two quickly grown to young womanhood
priceless offspring, whose treasured quasi
nubile kindled joie de vivre far surpassed
petrified plaguing yours truly (particularly
during pre/ post pubescent phase), outlook
grim to take life by the horns, nee apathetic

pestiferous psychological, frankly zapped
wracked, plagued aversion to live steering
any natural borne autonomy, (within meek
minecrafted muffled mortgaged self) bereft
existence, (albeit manifesting during latter
sainted days of boyhood), a death grip vis a

vis anorexia nervosa (robbing, stunting, and
halting critical puberty) against attaining my
maximum potential, nee then and every sub
seek went till present day truncating, stifling
raining aftermath of torturous, noxious, jinxed
insufferably hellacious, (hence reiteration to

cease livingsocial, rather antisocial) under_
scored, ordained, narrated by whirled series
of unfortunate events, (without courtesy of
Lemony Snicket), which passivity degraded,
exacerbated, fouled... gradual punctuation to
adulthood overridden when me as man-child

never tested survival, but found this scrivener
beating hasty retreat defeated by emotional
illness demarcating the Waterloo which I
fitfully fought when mandatory ultimatums,
measures, dictates...forced eviction within

cocooned hideaway (such as bedroom at 324
Level Road), which parallel repeated when
decamped at 1148 Greentree Lane, the latter
poisoned your welfare, with dire declaration
of toxic dependence (Zison's harshness) fed

deprivation, and desperation, while ye bore
brunt of emotional, financial, mental...fallout
indelibly etched within impressionable
Tabula Rasa, now the anguished suffering
ye unfairly experienced.

AU REVOIR!
Asper sweaty palms,
and other physiological ills
nothing beats infusion of
spine tingling electrifying chills -
experiencing psychological nirvana,
(nope NOT even
prescription medication pills)

except attaining, experiencing, and succumbing
delivering to ****** flesh, sans
nightly cathartic, intrinsic dream changing stills
and pacific inner calm gained,
thru shuteye, which tranquility
vis a vis REM hark able slumbers instills

necessary linkedin kickstarter instagram
godaddy transcendent reddit state, and fulfills
verity corroborated by perusing reliable
opinions painstakingly researched tracts
compiled by hands of
expert sleep specialists quills.

No surprise to me reading
(easy to understand)
judiciously, meticulously, and
professionally researched studies,
which unswervingly demand
the absolute zero tolerance

to deny deep jeep grand
(Cherokee) surrender into the land
where lovely bones and flesh
at rest, the agreed stand
hard quota of about seven hours finds
Melatonin the naturally occurring hormone,

secreted by the pineal gland
augmenting figurative trip wire,
where entire corporeal being fanned
by naturally biochemical processes
as if...complex species
guided by invisible hand.

Today, upon arising
without deafening vacuum
cleaner, yours truly did not feel gloom
me, nor rankle, an ordinarily mellow (Hume
more wrist) fellow, nee unlike
yesterday morning, where boom
ming ear splitting cacophony

gravely rented death stillness
unwittingly did exhume
even the grateful dead,
they did fuss and fume
(lumbering like 10,000 maniacs)
furious with rage

unbridled as many a jilted groom
(imagine a billion infuriated room
*** hating thwarted lovers) assume
ming stanced ready to throttle throat
of she that chose to clean house
no matter engendering global sonic boom.
153 · Sep 2018
My Little Feet
All of a sudden (upon
     immediately arising refreshed,
     whar these lovely
     bones did not ache

getting shut eye lasting
     amply time for
     fatigue to brake,
     long enough for tear ducts

     to generate sandy granule
     size piece smaller
     than a Jimmie
     sprinkled atop piece of cake

an inexplicable fanciful
     notion gripped me
     to circumnavigate the globe
(then during or after

     write a poem or journaled)
     possibly like Sir Francis Drake
who lived (circa 1540 –
     28 January 1596)

alight to adventure found
     yours truly though
     no longer tired
     i.e. once adequately

     rested and awake,
(despite sleeping respite
     did reckon asthma
     second daily nap

     no...no...no...,this not "FAKE)"
ah ran to the community room,
     cuz sigh did hanker for coffee,
     sans one of the (perky,

     finely grounded, Earthy)
     residents, who faintly resembled
     a Minnesotan from Land o Lake
did brew, filter, and invoke love

     said coffee she did make,
tubby extra sure boundless energy
would keep me alert for:
     long day's journey into night

and while walking briskly
(this took about a bajillion
     orbitz round the sun,
cuz ah...unfairly small feet

     for this opaque
     grown man hoop ping to partake
of sipping a hot cup of Joe,
     (despite the outside temperature

     feeling like a bajillion degrees -
     courtesy of global warming)
mouth (analogous to
     the dog of Pavlov)

     started to salivate
for desperate caffeinated
     thirst to slake
after a couple swallows...

     ah (no idea why butta)
     Zarathustra channeled
     thru me didst spake.
153 · Jul 2019
Dear daughter
Avast emotional gulf manifested; courtesy
series of unfortunate events; sundered
biologically accorded, cherished, enshrined
paternal bond; resultant dereliction defies,
justifies, ratifies...dissonance; unbearable
hindsight excoriates impropriety reviewing

***** deeds done dirt cheap; impossible mission
to excise indelibly etched psychological
impacted repercussions upon mine fountainhead;
weighing excruciating deserved self loathing;
permanently deplorable depravity yoked;
unyielding choke hold, no longer asking

forgiveness, but airing errant culpability;
dada's guilt indefensible impropriety; begetting
permanent fallout; exacting just desserts; bitter
regret beast of burden (oxe see *****) housed
within self made villain; unjust to impinge your
providential opportunities, whose blessed smarts

plus unfettered, unencumbered, undaunted...
daring do promise productive existence par
excellence, versus anxiety riddled torturous
legacy writ large across countenance this papa;
analogously das scribe bing mortal epitaph, while
dark shadows haunt this edgy rusty knight, who

once pawn time shrugged off mischievous
lascivious actions as payback; recognizably erred;
misperceptions (mine); deduced ex post facto,
when the missus doled out unpleasantries;
exploding anger; vented regarding significant
roiling perturbations harkening to her own

unrepentant poisonous stinging toxicity;
delivered courtesy birth parents; hands lack
king awareness to rock cradle with tender
loving care, hence burdened with childhood
tsoris prior to accepting yours truly as life
contra dance partner these preceding xxii+

years avoiding unseemly behavior; aware
that the mother of our two darling daughters
doth love and forgive me, though recouping
similar results with first offspring may remain
tense, and many years past not a happy camper.
One “FAKE” rumor purports April Fools’ Day
accepted with hostile abandonment
according to Giggle ling search result
conducted by this gent
adopted when France switched

rather than fight abolishment
transitioning from Julian calendar
to Gregorian calendar,
(yet maintaining same gender reassignment)
called for by the Council of Trent

affecting chronological abridgement
forthrightly, immediately, and
magically decreeing making
with flourish of inkhorn - prestidigitation
"****" quite few months absent

necessitating rejiggering
displaced vanished days forcing
latter time keeping paradigm absorbent,
asper sands of time no matter such
figurative tectonic shift population

aghast at August accomplishment
and probably did March in protest,
cuz entire season,
sans couture accouterment
suddenly rendered obsolete and unfashionable

manually crafted, swiftly tailored, and
harry styled clothes no mean achievement,
and uninformed folks got hashtagged
kindled, and named plenti admonishment
visited on their person such as

bumsteads, dolts, fools, et cetera
howling guffaws when derriere adornment
slapped with "kick me steady ***,"
or stuck with tail like appurtenances
eventually this "FAKE" – advancement

ha ha April fools historical joke
became embedded tradition inn advertent
lee established meshugas, where Jews
and especially gentiles went meshugoyim
generating cottage (cheesy) industry,

and brisk business for nascent advertisement
industry, (albeit handily horse drawn
attention grabbing kiln fired tablets)
mainly for (Philly buzzfeed string) affluent,
who secured lifelong gentlemen's agreement
with artisan, and of apprenticed trumpeting sons

(after tithe thing allotment) earnings
portion squirrelled away for rainy
May Day festivities ambient
brouhaha babushka's celebrating divine comedy
21st century poet tindered mild amusement
regarding this "FAKE" flight of fancy!
153 · May 2019
Spoken And/Or Written Words
Time gone by e'er since being quiet natured boy,
more so nowadays declare exhausting countless
hours expending, extolling, and exuding prufuse
joy, no surprise, asper experiencing passion, sans
reading (select age appropriate material as a lad in

make believe world) still bespectacled bright eyed
and bushy tailed, (most absolutely definitely agog)
accentuating, expanding vis a vis jabbering (within
privacy afford double one bedroom apartment B44)
erudition enthusiastically verbalizing printed material

in general, and exercising vocal cords aloud, not cuz
I admire krispy, raspy whispery voice particular, but
hearing and seeing appealing genres (mine, though
morse *** published authors especially informational)
purportedly not "FAKE" news incorporating sounding

out plus seeing words supposedly reinforces learning,
yet another less obvious pleasure (exclusive domain
availed primarily thru thesaurus brethren i.e. yepper
alphabetized lexicon, otherwise known as dictionary)
offers insight learning esoteric etymological minutiae

(just as quickly forgotten), which historical evolution
finds me temporarily linkedin both audiologically and
visually regarding forebears, (essentially transporters
thru numberless centuries) unwittingly, unknowingly,
unequivocally mumbling, modifying, massaging ever

evolving pronunciations sustaining communication as
living entity sustained throughout avast misty age pre
seeding impressing symbols (whether twenty six letters
of English language) upon tangible medium spurring

linguists to surmise aural and oral characteristics, and
no doubt searching complex edifice contemporary alive
tongues exhibited taking page from legacy of lingua
franca no longer extant.
Born five score minus seven years ago
minus attaining age of centenarian
father of civil rights movement,
the revered Martin Luther King Junior
honored as benevolent demigod figure
to the oppressed African American population

without whose bold risks
and subsequent brutal assassination April fourth
ninety sixty eight at the hands
of a crazed gunman (James Earl Ray),
whereby all the King's men
and all the King's horses...,

still aghast at tragic event
while reverberations felt forty two years later,
where embedded white privilege
begets continued racial strife
analogous to uncorked raging tempest
saddling people of color to human *******

(no matter ponying up excellent equestrians),
nevertheless wrought empowerment
advancing cherished dreams
of slaves recent descendents
allowing, enabling and providing
once attainable aspirations
only bestowed upon

the self anointed masters and early settlers of
the virginal North American contiguous land mass
yet…generations prior
to this prestigious public personality
Abolitionists pitted themselves
against the institution of slavery

incrementally raising awareness
regarding the abomination
forced servitude incurred on those shackled
thus setting the stage
for this grandson of A.D. Williams
a rural parsonage,

who ministered spiritual support
for the small congregation
(initially only thirteen members)
comprising attendants at
Ebenezer Baptist church in Atlanta Georgia
setting precedent for freedom

(at risk of life and limb) against scourge of
racial prejudice courtesy
of sharecropper grandparents
whose objection to racial segregation
based on an affront to the will of God,
whereby the young whip smart precocious lad,

(whose impact we now memorialize)
showed his true colorful promise
when a young student at
Liberal Crozer Theological Seminary
in Chester, Pennsylvania
where the yet uncrowned

eminent king came under the influence
of theologian Reinhold Niebuhr,
a classmate of his father's
at Morehouse College
who became a mentor by exposing
his protégée to liberal views of theology

planting the seeds of ardent activism
that gave rise to
The Southern Christian
Leadership Conference (SCLC),
an initial platform
allowing, enabling and providing acclaim

hoisted up by petard
invariably only heightened
(his) posthumous status
as thee most articulate orator
spelling binding the listeners
with his metaphors about his emphatic march

to a promised land where all
men/women could be brothers/sisters
and no person will be judged
by the color of his/her skin
raising morale of many dirt poor
ebony masses to feel a glimmer of hope.
in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
recorded July sixth nineteen sixty
upon birth of she who doggedly
pursued me to the ends of the earth
and what not take no as an answer.

Unbeknownst to yours truly
a baby girl got born
sixty three years from aforementioned date;
she automatically triggered
excited buzzfeeding murmurs
heard amidst the madding crowd
patiently awaiting to secure their eats
at none other than Horn & Hardart
offering their house special,
albeit free of charge;

the grandfather of present day
food service industry company Grubhub
acknowledged storied birth
with roster of special guests such as:
Connie Francis, Eddie Cochran
(the latter came all the way over
from the United Kingdom),
and even then president
Dwight David Eisenhower
made guest appearance.

Meanwhile, about sixty plus miles away
a little boy, (who lived
in Levittown, Pennsylvania)
experienced a fleeting warm gentle caress
identical to soft summer breeze
linkedin to sugar and spice
and everything nice;
he smiled and unknowingly blushed
unaware his destined lifemate
secured courtesy good housekeeping

seal of approval,
which may seem
like an otter outrageous claim,
but mark my words approximately
thirty orbitz around the sun later
would witness his heartthrob
(currently snoozing away on the bed)
pledging to accept first one contra dance
after another until... death due him part.

I ofttimes sat alone
on the concrete steps
at Summit Presbyterian Church
6757 Greene Street, Philadelphia, PA 19119
perusing contents of reading material
unable to focus on the words,
cuz excitement prevailed
to exalt in an evening of pure ecstasy.

The third Thursday each month
at eight o'clock post meridiem
held special significance
at above named facility,
which constituted kibitizing,
fraternizing, but especially flirting
while contra dancing
usually with no ulterior motive.

Our fate got sealed upon occasion,
when I willingly shared Neptune Salad
(a discontinued product sold at Wawa)
with lass who stood
all of four feet and eleven inches
and sported trademark long thick hair,
whose locks (I dreadfully report
long since got lopped off),
then rivalled those of Rapunzel.

As an introverted generic
long haired pencil necked geeky lad
always awkward in the company of people
(even making small talk),
an eventual comfort to converse arose
with longitudinally challenged referenced gal,
whose buzzfeeding dialogue
indeed jump/kick started
us to exchange tidbits about ourselves,
such as address, age, birthday...
and other general information,
hence bringing to my awareness
regarding special occasion
she made debut appearance
within webbed, wide world.

Said lass subsequently
became dance partner for life
after she found herself with child
we became husband and wife.
Hmm... on second thought
lemme join anorexic club
until rib cage protrudes taut and visible
doubling as drum to drub
synchronized within heart of darkness,
especially when electrocardiogram exhibits
absolute zero vital sign,
cardiac arrest translates
as cessation to lub dub,
hence yours truly

declared dead as doornail,
coroner report deems arrhythmia
directly linkedin to deliberate Machiavellian flub
courtesy the missus attempt to poison me
actually aborted cuz nanobots
loosed upon body gripped with rigor mortis,
a minor inconvenient truth
cuz odorless and tasteless deadly toxins
rendered me convalescing
from bout with death, an oxymoronic
former slenderman gourmand.

temporarily deceased
until said microscopic robots
avidly analogous to frenzied
figuratively hogtied pigs
buzzfeeding at a trough
creating porcine hubbub
invisible nanoids (0.1-10 micrometres)
accomplished programmed task
whereby fatal microbes they did scrub
away leaving me fit as a fiddle.

No matter she thoroughly, painstakingly
and lovingly didst strew
haphazardly she threw
leftovers together,
this blustery march like
November twenty six figuratively view
wing the remaining thirty plus days
of two thousand twenty one
thoroughly cooked in microwave until...
poor excuse for my meal appeared
with consistency of shoe leather.

Think the missus not afraid
of Virginia Woolf keen to experiment
treating me like the Gingerbread Hag would
questionable resultant glop pantomimed
for my guessing pleasure
never in bajillion years
as amateurish Marcel Marceau charade
performance courtesy the spouse,

an entrée she gave - yours truly
immediately sought to evade
me subsequently evincing
horrific puckered mealy mouth
as though I swallowed hand grenade
figurative exploding oral cavity
feeble futile gesticulation inveighed.

Thus, methinks himself wise
to don cooking apron
please do not ask why
trumpeting self as master chef boyardee
so move over wife and allow husband to try
his hand (using skill - let) me prepare Thai
and/or other Asian cuisine dish,
cuz when free to potschke

(To fuss or "mess around"
inefficiently and inexpertly), I haint shy
to blend (indiscriminately) ingredients
ofttimes yours truly barley able to ply
boiling water since significant other
does not give this garden variety
and generic, gimlet eyed
gourmandizing guilt free
Earth friendly gumption goaded guy.

Every so often yours truly
gets so hungry, he could eat a horse
(yours truly jest kidding hoof course)
truth be told, I only eat one meal per day
all day from son up to son down, me a force
tubby reckoned with,
who if he gives way to vice
event chew wooly experiences remorse.

Hum glad to share mine reasonably rhyming hook
twenty six letters linkedin amidst
various combinations, formations, permutations,...
allows, enables, and provides a look
into the mindscape of Matthew Scott Harris
doth show himself with steely dangling
nonsense with sense and sensibility he forsook.
Martial law inapropos to stave, staunch,
and stem police brutality,
nevertheless commander in chief
will violently barrel ahead
particularly when blatant iniquities
flagrantly heaped upon
innocent dark skinned human bodies,
who far to often get accosted, beaten, choked
without justice, but
judged guilty merely existing.

Protestations within metropolitan urban areas
all across the United States
sparking riots else within world
began in Minneapolis on May 26, 2020
following the death of George Floyd
coroners determine cause of death asphyxia
after Minneapolis Police Department (MPD) officer
Derek Chauvin knelt on his neck
for 8 minutes and 46 seconds.

Akin to striking a match
into highly flammable liquid
diverse people expressed legitimate rage
against machinations targeting humans,
whose obvious epidermal pigment
unwittingly sacrifices said
dark skinned people burnt offerings.

Sacrificial lambs only become martyrs,
yet sadly never realize their true value, nor
relish (hot diggity dog) purposefulness
cuz her/his mortality nipped in (figurative) bud
when precious life cruelly stolen.

As iterated courtesy similar
crafted by yours truly
persons falsely hash tagged recalcitrant
(predominantly boys and/or men)
exhibiting physiognomy proclaiming
African American, Australia,

Haiti, Melanesia, Papua
New Guinea and South Asia...
as motherland, more so
black immigrants comprise
growing proportion of said
racial (constituency) population.

Usually no culpability
linkedin with rudely mistreated individual,
whose inalienable (inherent) rights:
life, liberty and pursuit of happiness
hijacked solely predicated upon bigotry.

I (despite Caucasian visage)
plus concomitant anatomical accouterments
immediately grant badge of honor
and status of greater worthiness,
when doggone truth
does not merit me

automatic immunity against racial profiling
nsync, where upon birth said black people
unfairly falsely labeled hooligan
disproportionately assumed accountable
regarding crimes and misdemeanors
essentially faulting gregarious person

unknowingly caught in crosshairs
where twenty first century bounty hunter
experiences little or no compassion
towards dignified people,
whereat mine preferred modus operandi
to communicate utter disgust

(think malevolent treatment)
at mercy of cops,
née outright killers
more keen to loose a deadly bullet
versus win/win situation
comprising proactive conversations.

Though red hot poker anger
clearly evidenced courtesy
peaceful altercation (granted hoodlums
abound within fray to wreak bedlam),
but initial and foremost justification
explaining madding crowds
solely seeking redress asper grievances

maiming or killing decent,
kind, respectable neighbor
which hypothetical gal/guy going
about her/his ordinary business
all the while watched, scrutinized, notated...
simply because she/he happens
to belong to proud people of color!

I believe the pen (er... or keyboard)
more powerful than the sword
(substitute agitation, fisticuffs, melee...)
to recognize dignity of brethren and sistern
despite superfluous characteristic namely
melanocytes in some individuals and ethnic groups
which produce variable amounts of melanin.
Greek mythological
drama flourishes,
nee thrives within
noggin of yours truly
gods and goddesses
sporting Hellenic origins

purportedly cavort
higgledy-piggledy
rampantly running ragged
ruminative raconteur
resultant rueful end product
wreckage of present day me

chafing amidst yesteryear's adversities
shadow boxing doppelganger nemesis
fetus in fetu maintaining stranglehold
choking ability to breathe
unsuccessful roundup eradication
resultant mailer daemons

ruling the roost
time and again professional
therapy exorcised futility
psyche plagued with said
crudely sketched hobgoblins
permanently lodged within

fifty plus shades gray matter
mein kampf analogous to siege
and/or civil war
abductor and hostage
terrorist versus negotiators
one and the same person

ideal fecund environment
irresistible nasty brutes
unwilling to forsake
golden opportunity
passive languishing helpless
antisocial bumbling creature

mandate decreed heir extinguished
sentenced eventually commuted
life without parole lifetime
metaphorically imprisoned harsh
punishment solitary confinement
crime synonymous equalled

chance happenstance ovulation
nsync with seminal linkedin
fertilization, impregnation, parturition
essentially random appalling dice throw
courtesy biological roulette

automatic defacto malefactor
abstractly describes lifelong
condemnation, humiliation, ostracization
hence if nothing else
no shortage writing material.
Screaming headlines erupted...
BREAKING news...massacre
barrage of gunfire
wrought countless deaths
newly minted unknown
mass murderer suddenly infamous

speculation immediately
trumpeted hate crime
targeted, premeditated, calculated
mass murderous sprees,
gunmen gloated gleefully
resultant mayhem throve

countless dead tally increased
security details, police,
and emergency crews
barked orders while
yellow crime tape cordoned
mortally wounded

and seriously injured
rushed into onsight
triage units as sirens blared
killer(s) coup shattered
tenuous complacency
prior cautious optimism

hesitantly blinked awoke
initial six months
two thousand nineteen
witnessed eerie calm
before tabloid magazines
ripped pages incomplete bios

unleashed blitzkrieg bullets
rent asunder sanguine flickr
joyus kindled linkedin
outlook presaging quaint
good n plenti peace on Earth
good will to men/women

annihilated as bullets besieged
random innocent victims
giddily, indiscriminately, wantonly...
slain in cold blood
immediate conspirator theorists
gin up rumor mill

defend homicidal maniac
simultaneously don MAGA hats
invectives incurring anti racist
bigoted, capital one
demagogue googly eyed president
unsurprisingly witnesses
popularity uptick

"loose canon" Grinchy grin
hooligan prince smiles
Machiavellian ghost lauds
apprentice regarding 2020 candidacy
able, ready, and willing
promise furnishing arms to the teeth
for every man, woman, and child
as campaign slogan.
Pow War Full Pointed Outlook

As I ponder what to write
today august thirtieth
      two thousand eighteen,
     thy ploy doth in vite
a gamut of spontaneous thoughts,
     that loosely cluster
     before becoming tight
lee bound toward

     quasi definitive agreeable, amenable,  
     and attainable in sight
with no deliberate intent
     to suppress perspective
     couched asper left of political right,
though mine embedded
     liberal democratic ideology
     automatically shifts, gingerly

     escorts, inherently focuses,
     and understandably dodges quite
unconsciously, naturally, and expressly
     viz zit ting orientation trained mindset
     spiked railroad ties to follow
     a NON "FAKE" conservative track,
     cuz existential plight
of this run of the

     NON mill (let) airy night
owl hoot trumpets,
     thru his pen chant
     pedantic laden poetic might
(albeit gently modest)
     with artful badinage,
     garbage, and persiflage light
nsync with his (my) being,

     an aspiring good (rook key) knight
calculating, formulating, intuiting,
     where to shine
     his (mine) figurative jacklight
asper shying away
     NOT to antagonize
     predicated on me
     humble extrasensory insight

drawing, distancing, and detaching
     metaphorical grip,
     sans innate bias height
end from lifetime
     steeped within progressive
     (forward thinking atheistc) paradigm,
     hence impossible to adopt
     a totally tubularly neutral

     point of view presents avowed challenge
     to present opinions of yours truly
     without instigating a verbal
     and/or virtual gunfight
boot hoop fully friendship,
     asper attempting tubby forthright,
and apologizing for

     any stinging backlash
     if accidental affront,
     thus encouraging healthy
     discourse without excite
ting vitriolic, toxic,
     and/or dramatic dogfight
with this cat tug gar rick cull
     poet hood dont bite!
Nope reforming hardened criminal donning
scarred face, manacles jailhouse stripe, et cetera
nor taming screwish incorrigible guttersnipe
ain't most difficult enterprises
entailing me to wipe
dripping sweat from my hoary brow,

neither primary tsoris,
(i.e. Yiddish, asper in woeful gripe),
but reading tome thick as stovepipe
hat, I declare constitutes most grueling task
paging thru compendium of words A thru Z
may rank less purposeful than bovine tripe.

not surprisingly causing mine gray matter
(more'n fifty shades), to wanna up and scatter
fist size shot thru unnecessarily subjected
to feel like oversaturated blatter
vehemently aggrieved mad as a hatter
to appease, boost and flatter

ever shrinking fanbase blithely bandying
faux poetic pitter patter
trumpeting expansive vocabulary
enlivened, leavened, seasoned... smatter
ring poem to expressive affinity
how bajillion combinations
twenty six letters one can splatter

casually incorporating multisyllabic
word such as sesquipedalian
less to boast more so to chatter
up food for thought perhaps...
infect reader to accrue fatter
vocabulary than mine

actually rather paltry yoke cant argue
yukon (albeit figuratively) tatter
with little effort hen even
offer as hors d'oeuvres
to this storied scribbling wildcatter.
(conceived while in utero
which loosely summarization in toto
of this ordinary Joe Schmoe,
who did wade nine months for a roe
at mercy of obstetricians status quo,

giving me a jump start to blend pro
pen city utilizing both a very small oboe,
and combination cross bow
either plucking or shooting from off
umbilical cord mocks nocks notched arrow.
          
Biological copulation draws, etches, fashions
genesis hewing, inscribing jeweled kismet,
legislating miraculous novitiate officiating
poignant outcome quintessential reproduction
seminarians theological universal vocalization

whittling ** xy yearning zealously, zestfully
aggregating begotten cell diminutive elementary
fecund gametes glommed gooey honied
insulated joined kindled live miniscule netizen
outlook plenti qualified readied simulacrum

thrumming undifferentiated voiceless wisp,
xpert yin/yang zygote (adroit bitcoin currency)
describing extemporaneous fusion generates
hormonal influx juices kickstarting life

manifold natural occurrence pregnancy
quilts rudimentary secrete tapestry until vicar
wizard yields zealous adorable biological
concatenation, derivative extrapolated

filigreed ****** helped induce jointly
knotted linkedin minecraft nascent
ovulation presaging quintessential
reproduction, sharing trimesters, umbilical
venerated womb yearning Zen.

Amazing baby, credit deoxyribonucleic
acid, enigma fantastically grand husband
injected jetted klatch, leaving microscopic
nothings, opportunistically pierced quarters,
readied shutterfly trap, ****** vibrantly
welded x2c yoked Zapped.

A bun cooks definitive enchilada, formula
generations hardy induce jimmied kin,
labored maternal newborn, one pricked
queue, randiness spurred ****** ubiquitously,
voyaged whimpering xing yelper zings.

Adoration bequeathed commencing doting
eyeing, fondling, giving heartfelt infusion
joyus kindred living momentous novel
offspring perpetrate quickening rapport

subjected treatment unequivocally validates
wonderful Xit yolking bearable delivery
fostering  heavenly joy kneading,
legitimizing, masterminding nascent

ontogenesis pacifying quivering reverentially
terminating viability, where yips align  
crying embryo finis gestating heralding
jubilant loving natural parental reverence.

Reality inundates the full term offspring
embarks upon a lifelong journey (initially as  
foreigner sans in utero), but willfulness viz
life source secures survivor against pinging

peccadilloes learning by trial and error to iron
out kinks as one among the human league
since modus operandi transcend encumbrances
triggers built in impetus to traverse potential

pitfalls along the space/time continuum trajectory
which adversity only serves to net greater strength
since that instantaneous and spontaneous bitmap
encoded upon conception.
wont get a red cent from me
(explained by following words you see)

No...not until the 
     bitter cold temperature, 
     sans iron maiden 
     (Polar Vortex) grips 
Southeastern Montgomery County 
     (Perkiomen Valley) Pennsylvania 
     will this foo fighting 
      goo goo doll, beastie boy - hips
 
stir survivalist 
     wannabe contemplate 
     cracking on the heat, 
     no matter mine lips
might turn me, and 
     false teeth chatter 
     (even after taking them 
     out of my mouth)
  
     as the mercury dips
way below degrees 
     (Centigrade, Fahrenheit, 
     or Kelvin) oh Lord 
     will passing thought eclipse
penumbra of mine 
     cerebral cortex reckon eyes,
the benefits to future
 
     cryogenicists voluntarily becoming 
     (a frozen human 
     Guinea Pig) realize 
zing molecular biochemical 
     behavior practically 
     comes to a stand 
     still, I surmise,
which cessation of
  
     ordinary senescence buys
time until some 
     future age, when scientists 
     long since didst devise
strategies to approach immortality, 
     (viz keeping "live" body 
     electric factory completely 
     preserved), and get wise
 
to hidden secret to exorcize  
death be not 
     proud, thus putting 
     funeral parlors out of business, 
     which astute morticians who espies
the future, and how 
     the quaint practice, 
     asper burial plots
  
     (oh...so yesteryear), 
     and dramatically dies
down quickly giving rise
to the burgeoning enterprise
re: bajillion dollar franchise,
where death cab for cutie 
     offers ***** prize
a coffin (grateful dead set)
     "feign" to eulogize.
152 · May 2019
Choking Back The Tears!
This papa did accurately
surmise undeclared war
strong armed lance pierced my armour,
ah...how fondly he recalls
early fatherhood days of yore,
when daddy's first born girl

did effusively adore
yours truly, he likened self as topnotch
trooper, who mustered vigour
exhibiting untrammeled unconditional
tender loving behaviour
before conflict erupted as between

mainland China and Uighur
back in the day din and clangour
honed, perfected, battle
tested... mine steely danse zing mettle
admirable trait evinced by this troubadour,
when understandable mutiny arose 'tween

me and "Munchkin" donut ask anymore,
why spouse described eldest
with pet name eldest she smoothly bore
intermittent flashpoints smoothed, sans
24/7 at beck and call, I availed to assuage
with papa's magical succor

distressed damsel (daughter number one),
she established an endearing rapport
with me telepathic sixth sense touchstone
oft times found even how sailors swore
dem crude words
extraneous, ridiculous, superfluous...

if unhappiness did evidently colour
hint, asper hinting off kilter her humour
characteristic woeful crimp evoking dour
demeanor accompanied unhappiness countenance
easily placated thru cuddling, viz comfort
and reassurance, the panacea wherefore

"star student" resumed former activity,
which nurturing trend came to screeching halt
as said lass matured courtesy
puberty, where rancor
more challenging than...

childhood summoning more
than a spontaneous gambit,
hence necessity fore
age appropriate strategy to reconnoiter
parental strategy as throwing feint against
emotional foe, feeble fiery feedback

unseated formerly unrivaled dada furthermore
awkwardness arose when teenage solace
sought among preferred best friend(s)
accelerated as das dada lost lustrous glamour
plus, his snappy truculent unfettered
brusqueness, especially when minimizing

computer screen window "this bear did roar"
"nothing," when unconvincing feint "fake" retort
she saw deception, vis a vis married man scour
ring and/or posting personal classifieds
which mutiny capsized bounteous

fidelity, gentility, integrity...no labour
of love kin aright
now, an invisible oaken wall betwixt us
n'er to be rent asunder, e'en when rigor
mortis gives reason for grim reaper to snigger.
Especially experiencing onset dehydration,
this opinion shared by former consumer,
he quaffed truckloads sugary and sports drinks
found mine once sculpted baby boomer body
undergoing gender reorientation, particularly
nondescript ******* incrementally found

busting (rivaling ******* bunny chest)
necessitated this garden variety
NON GMO gluten free husband
"papa," an endearment
addressed by the missus
puzzled when her

brassieres went missing
loathe to believe what sounded
like **** and bull story
embarrassed, yet finally
relented into pestiferous
inquisitiveness hen pecking wife,

she stood agape, after I dare bare
unclothed upper torso revealed
floppy, limp biscuit sagging
sorry excuse for *****
hence necessitating yours truly
to resort as partial crossdresser,

yet never foreseeing
anatomical morphology transforming
(analogous to mushroom popping up
following bucketloads of rain)
thus went cold turkey,
(as attested by this gobbledygook)

to swear off high caloric non nutritious
popular beverages
(generating bajillions dollars),
and additionally
forced non chipper infowar
i.e. internal three ring circuits

uncivil insurrection
(less than seven years ago)
as weeks elapsed months
(this unplanned resolution
dated early two thousand nineteen),

discarded over the shoulder boulder holder
in tandem with exercise
few times per week
plying twenty pound dumbbells
a pronounced reduction
saved me big bucks
undergoing cosmetic surgery!
'bout fluffiness of hair after washing

Now get ready for...
yup intelligent persiflage
determining if ***** "talk" gauge
correctly calibrated courtesy this sage.

Beats out global warming
by a long stretch
most important commander
must set example you betch
chore life no matter
if miserable wretch

survives impeachable offenses
enough to make me kvetch,
especially four more years
yours truly will once again become
bulimic anorexic wretch.

Versus important crisis
of planet Earth,
where Gaia's bountiful
nature woolworth
analogous wharf resplendent
docks side of ships berth state
housing electricity generating

mined resources inevitable dearth
warming chill folks
courtesy ***** hearth
reminiscent during inchoate
fetal nine months
in utero signaling imminent birth.

Quite understandable reasonable,
non negotiable, inviolable...
blah... blah... blah
scalp itching blather
particularly to prioritize
orange-blond hirsute fullness

upon rinsing sudsy shampoo lather
as expressed by this
post baby boomer
pencil neck geek father,
who attempts to walk poetic feet
across cyber sea
miraculously to slather.

Trademark seedy nonsensical
farcical gobbledygook,
perhaps posthumously printing
bestselling blank paginated chapbook

ghost written by Trump
titled Art of the Steal
detailing head and shoulders how to look
suave and sophisticated all business

swiftly tailored harried style shook
White House disguised himself as rook
key "Fake" incognito president
recruiting apprenticed bartered bride
slow vacuuming trophy wife crook

cow hoard milching, kickstarting,
inciting, generating... donnybrook
coiffing pompadour resembling
forefathers windblown periwig.

Nope not even one hair
mussed out of place,
as if teetering fountainhead
supporting Atlas shrugged

top heavy topples
and crashes scattering
bajillion easy pieces everyplace
analogous to humpty dumpty
each and every last vestige

vanishing without a trace
exiting out cloaca
subsequently intently watching
toilet bowl royally flush
clockwise if within northern hemisphere

heavy enough to sink submarine
haint no reason yours truly might gush
even if abominable ballast
saves queasy passengers
plummeting thru aerospace.
This self anointed,
     deluded, glorified aye
man master ba...
     ba...baiter by
sharing his muttering
     dogma hoops chai
Guru Dev to see
     reactions viewing dia

metric lee apposite
     stance of mine to Eli
ten divert precepts gleanined
     from this small fry,
(a secular humanist) this guy
welcomes reactions hie
hastened, viz occipal organs, I
bet sparked visually intrigued an

emotion perhaps vehemently can
not stand disparate
     atheist modality fan
sing their creed steeped Han
dully irreproachable immediately jan
gling with internal repugnance
     opposing as out lan
dish any non parochial

     bull leaf man
dating evolutionary
     tenets as abominable
     toward impious heresy
     impugning a pan
thee on of
     Doubting Thomas decrying
     “FAKE” ******* up tree men

     Das Creator, who essentially
     in this beastie
     boy mind pure ran
dum ness to cosmic
     phenomena yes, tan
tum mount to
     heretical (not tomb
     any generations gone by –
     way before Western Civilization
     predominate the capitalistic
     paradigm, an on
     set of mass urban
iz aye shu, who...blindly pre sip
     poe zed, an esse

     hen shul divine Van
Halen superstar deity
     unconditionally – wan
     ton lee selfless,
     nameless highness faultless
huss scent shawl lee
     dons role of passive ace
of spaces, heart of darkness

     diamonds eminent grise brace
sing mankind, whose
     docent spout morals
     from their sanctified dais
scorning the strong
     temptations that entice
snd the virtue
     endowed agaist surrendering

into the pitfalls of vice.          
No (bow wow byte) intent
     to postulate any absurd
claims, whereby
     a flock of seagulls
     among the mass
     at least one angry bird
perhaps **** sitter ring

     me in the whey
of some global
     proselytizing ambition ankh curd
in millenniums of
     devout where religious
     flavor of the era
     atempted to en gird
the spare scattered

     clusters of humanity
     whereby an un
     learened mortal heard
a “voice, ” no doubt
     this supposed “chosen”
     one so inured
to dirt poor existence,
     which visualization didst appear

attributed to utter
     exhaustion fatigued body clear
ready to collapse,
     when the e'er
the mind mind
     plays tricks gear
ring tubby the laughingstock.
Ah... already the summer
approaches closing time,
but yours truly can squeeze
one more rhyme
before September first,
thus the following lines after...

Brainstorming, concentrating
panning... for poem
idea shattered brew
tilly by deafening seasonal
greensward cutting crew
contracted throughout summer to mow
leaves of grass
every Tuesday, which drew
attention toward fragrant aroma
seeping into nostrils
of me - match hew,
heavily negated true

quiescence courtesy ear splitting
soundcloud of driving
mowers even moo
ving bovines would
clap cloven hooves
over soft as lambs wool

sensitive hearing micro corkscrew
innards, viz their *****
shaped audiological
anatomical accouterments -
cow word lee lowing Jew
pitter Io sliver by jove whew
once silence returns
(after cessation rip snorting bedlam)
savoring the hum of nature anew,
and moost likely relish
fresh cut leaves of grass
as I inhale analogous

delectable waft of homebrew
albeit molecules borne aloft
after sharp heavy duty blades
of industrial riding mowers bestrew
higglety pigglety, helter skelter
juicy fruit chlorophyll rich
plants releasing nectar
sweet as honeydew
olfactory imbibing nostalgic view
of yesterday, when agrarian farmsteads
populated landscape picturesquely
anointing, exuding, messaging...

perfuming faint clue
intimating rural lifestyle forebears
hapt tubby privy too,
where deer and antelope played
unaccosted by impending urbanization,
hence such idyllic serene rue
man nation - visage you

would probably concur
as most divine comity
worth more than any buckeroo
could purchase - vestiges vanishing
without a trace adieu
mother nature nowhere found
except caged up within human zoo.
here I sit wondering aboot what yorn
reaction will be
similar to mice elf, wrought n fused
within microscopic cast iron crucible -
genetic dna spinning along chromosomal nearly invisible axle
describing vaguely shaped rose tarnished gun metal n worn
off limits by the gun metal thorn
until trust grows even if chance of adultery
germinates a field of aching scorn
n sunny friendship illuminating some future morn
whereby in bliss we doze while asleep
   lightly snoring like a piping  horn
swell outcome viz 9 months later plump n juicy like a corn
cob, a baby like this grown LVIII macbook user will be born
subject to the dictate of fate the trappings of wealth
whether he/she struggles hardscrabble penury
or wealth will adorn.

as per the case with me in utero of thy long deceased mum
sprung from tender ***** with joie de vivre she - did hum
Arthur Murray Ballroom Instructor - whose heart fluttered like a drum
cuz, twas love at first sight -
drawn tummy handsome dad - a Columbia University alum
who didst beget me:
-------------------------------------------------------------­----------
a cerebral being
this ordinary human, who finds himself a mystery
within the terrestrial firmament and frequently
feels in a feverish pitch at his existence, that seers the temple
mounted upon this some what slender frame - wrought by
combination of genetics in tandem with exercise
which latter helps to sublimate the coiled
tension wound tightly like an indestructible
spring without healthy medium to channel emotions fraught within me
might find demise, that would rent asunder literate fellow
and annihilate with no trace, one true valued father of two special
lovely teenage near grown lasses as just another statistic among obituaries.
Next page