though two thousand nine hundred
will be here in seventy five years,
a mere blink of the eye
never to early
to think about fêted occasion
which marks the beginning
of the 22nd century.

if not yourself (dear reader)
than think about generations to come
(thus far without an appellation),
who will point to old faded photographs
exclaim, and chuckle
while ribbing the person
next to them -
possibly their living social kith and kin,
which relationships), where said freeze frame
portrays folks staring and smiling back
at a time when MAGA
imposed a heavy hand
(think iron maiden ruled),
the constitution and
declaration of independence
long since made a mockery
on what used to be inalienable rights
of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness
essentially giving rise to an underground,
where scions of musky Trump's heirs
ruled the United States of America ever since
by bigfooted diktats, fiats, et cetera.

byzantine cradle to grave strictures
(courtesy the invisible hand
of big brother and sister)
mandated every citizen
except the one percent quadrillionaires
to pay obeisance
with blood and a pound of flesh if necessary
come hell or high water;
should one get hashtagged
as catchall term insubordinate,
which loosely translated
meant a subject defied,
whether accidentally or purposely
some arbitrary obscure law
(envision if you will -
the judge's gavel as if on cue
comes down hard and fast with a guilty verdict),
cuz even the least serious violation
warranted harshest sentence
matter of fact
any and all infractions
the dictator conveniently considered
punishable misdeeds as capital offense,
meant an automatic decree of death,
and should the unfortunate soul find him/herself
at the receiving end of harsh punishment,
(which can be guaranteed without fail),
he/she owned sole freedom
to choose their demise;
essentially government
controlled every breath one took
from conception to death
until that final exhalation,
which expiration of subject
decreed by coroner
named B. Aaron number xyz.

right into the slammer
one went if out the mouth one gave cheek
long haired pencil necked geek
being unduly submissive and meek
considered an advantage under regime(s)
that promised to be brutal,
nasty and short forcing
doubting thomas to hobble
along after receiving a whack,
and unsavory tweet and tweak
about the nose or ears.

thus genetic engineers bred
docile traits passive as a human
being part and parcel of the grateful dead,
nevertheless an occasional chromosomal quirk
transmitted emboldened individual,
whereat he/she fled,
yet authorities eventually found miscreant
and gave him/her unforgettable
pistol whipping over their head
essentially wreaking vengeance
renting asunder comfortably numb noggin
rendering freshly minted jughead,
whereat moments before
once brilliant brainiac
lost considerable intelligence quotient points
no smarter than a block of lead.

where amble lances
hurled with the might
of off fish hull seductress dances
setting figurative stage to take a bite
from canoodling beastie boy best eaten alive
or just after freshly being killed.

oblivious to the ramifications
courtesy the deafening ear splitting sound,
nor mindful of the devastating emotional fallout
lurking within outer limits of dark shadows
ineluctably drawn into ****** pacification,
yours truly surrendered
to the atavistic call of the wild.

heedless where "still thelassic waters run deep,"
I set the prow of skiff
christened Matthew Scott Harris
unbeknownst of the
shark and piranha infested waters
far from the pseudo sanctuary of safety
(way out of eyesight
and earshot of being rescued)
forsook being availed
from self destruction
courtesy the rocky shoal
littered with the detritus
flotsam, and jetsam
of lovely bones devoid of flesh
tell·tale sign of ferocious,
malicious, and vicious
maneaters particularly satiating
young stud muffins buffed
in the prime of their life
although if slim pickings occur
even old Norwegian Bachelor
spinning yarns about fictitious town
of Lake Woebegone, Minnesota
'where all the women are strong,
all the men are good looking,
and all the children are above average.'

Rather, I succumbed to primal urge
head over heels
far as the eye could see
barenaked ladies
blindsided yours truly
into a false sense of security,
where nymphs cavorted, sported
and particularly exhorted me
to forego sense and sensibility
and to ***** rationality,
where misfortune signaled my demise.

I insouciantly ignored a sixth sense
warning me against further trespass,
nevertheless overpowering temptation
for carnal desire
(read a strong longing
for physical or ****** pleasure
this despite being a married male,
albeit celibacy gripped ***** -
quizzically hardening prickliness
into test easy rider of decadence feeling
conflict against sacrosanct pledged troth
vows upended The vows:
"I, _, take thee, _,
to be my wedded wife/husband,
to have and to hold from this day forward,
for better, for worse,
for none the richer, for none the poorer,
in sickness and in health,
to love and to cherish,
till death do us part,
according to God's holy ordinance;
and thereto I pledge thee my faith"
entreating, kickstarting, and readily
zapping sacrilegious oath)
dwindling horniness linkedin
pacified tactile ******* zeal
to the point where ****** horns trumpet
voice of a castrato, a male singer
who castrated before puberty
since taking prescription medication
to quell generalized and performance anxiety,
especially when premature *******
compromised potential ******* ******
immediately tempering hormonal secretion
by **** tat videre licet limp libido
superseded voyaging into dangerfield
strewn with deadly landmines.

(and cries out long day's journey into night,
no...not for Eugene O'Neill),
but rather being distributed
in their respective bins at Wegmans
Under the Elms

Dressed up in our Sunday finery,
(which attire frankly looks no different
than the clothes we wear on any other occasion,
nevertheless we try our level best
with steely mettle,
we haul gull *** to said location
in a concerted effort
to be romantic on those singular occasions
looking into the eyes of each other
and blowing a kiss
to the once upon a time fair maiden,
who caught mine heart and soul
immediately breaking free and clear
of reverie, and getting
back to the grubby business at hand
as we hurriedly distribute reusable materials
into their respective bins,
so we can commence shopping for food,
which dual purpose outing
(us old married couple codgers
feign being youngbloods in love)
subsequently came to be hashtagged
"A night on the town,"
(which title - after doing a Google search
unknowingly identical to
Rod Stewart's seventh album, released in 1976)
located at 600 Commerce Drive Providence
Town Center Collegeville, PA 19426‎.

The missus (once upon a time
and in a former incarnation
repurposed as a paper shredder,
thus I continually remind myself
not to put fingers of mine
anywhere near her teeth),
nevertheless counts herself
as a diehard advocate of recycling,
especially pulpy flesh
and goes the extra green mile, or two, or three...
to make her contribution
to ecological beneficence,
and within which eco conscious upbringing
our two daughters (now grown
and livingsocial on their own)
free and clear of birth parents
whose mien mean marred psyches
etched indelible opportunistic ugly yelp review.

Because the weather got so darned
(please feel free to substitute
your favorite expletive) cold,
(compard to six months,
when I bemoaned the polar opposite
weather related lament),
we stashed bulging bags
of empty metal cans,
plastic containers and empty bags,
glass bell jars, paper, et cetera
in our (actually mine)
2020 white Hyundai Elantra
leaving neither little room
for a driver, passenger, hitchhiker,
nor a corpse to get stuffed in the trunk,
which would pose an inconvenient truth
to a hypothetical lifeless body.

We promised ourselves
(girl scout's honor in my case,
and boy scout's honor courtesy the missus)
come the first warm day,
the above listed materials
will fill up the appropriate bins at Wegmans,
cause the facility where we reside
(Highland Manor Apartments -
managed by Crooks and Quade)
does not deal with materials
that can be repurposed.

Thus the reason without rhyme why
the five year old aforementioned automobile
strongly resembles the vehicle
ideal for junkyard dogs
on Sanford and Son's -
one of the countless sitcoms -
first episode aired January 14th, 1972
produced by Norman Lear,
which essentially follows the premise
where junk dealer Fred Sanford -
a older man of color
runs roughshod over
his son and partner, Lamont,
in a groundbreaking situation comedy.

Fred's money making schemes
routinely backfire, and he does
just about anything to get out of working --
up to and including faking a heart attack.

Aside from the father figure character
being rude, sarcastic, outspoken,
overtly prejudiced,
and pretty **** nasty
to his friends and family,
and other than outstanding belligerent traits,
the older man makes for a fine companion.

Additionally, the spouse used to save
compostable material in the freezer,
(and come the warmer months,
when spring announced
courtesy twittering songbirds
and light buds
barely peeking thru the cold earth
she will do the same)
buzzfeed leftover food -
to animals James Herriot would smile
on as All Creatures Great and Small,
All Things Bright and Beautiful,
All Things Wise and Wonderful,
plus various and sundry other book titles
paying homage to dear animals,
who populate and take refuge
within the strip of sum mall woodland
barely edible in the first place
that got blessedly
co-opted courtesy mold.

Actually most times the wife
who does patchke
(to fuss or mess around
in an inefficient or inexpert way)
surprisingly enough the I married
not quite three decades ago
does manage to hit upon
a flavorful cause célèbre
to be a Michelin success
earning the maximum number of stars
plus she starred and got showcased on
Top Chef Amateurs.

In an attempt to recount how life came about on planet Earth,
thence subsequently spanning across the webbed wide world
birthed cockamamie idea within mind of then young Matthew
Scott Harris, who knew nothing about Charles Darwin Origin
of Species controversial revolutionary annunciation with much
excitation videre licet painstakingly slow process of evolution,
where over the course of billions of years origin of life became
as told to him tongue in cheek courtesy his kibitzing father and
mother manifest hoodwinked him (said boy gullibly prone to
accept gospel that every object in the sky peopled unwittingly
complement Harris mad scientist, (who spent substantial years
self sequestered - much like writer of these words) fabricating
in retrospect far out and groovy improbable hypotheses about
Norwegian bachelor farmer, who in an attempt to make powder
milk biscuits, put the ingredients in the refrigerator and absent
mindedly forgot about them until unusual noises heard distinctly
linkedin within invention to keep perishables frozen or cold - a
constant almost rhythmic rattle & hum eventually drew curious 
resident of Lake Woebegone, and supposed missing link within
genealogical family tree, which ostracized forebear unwittingly
created perfect magnetic force field environment where steely
sons of ******* outliers from outer limits of the twilight zone
not unlike the Jetsons (a fictional family from animated sitcom
of same name ineluctably pulled (usually against their will) said
television show aired in the1960s, and viewed by none other than
yours truly me as a rather quiet natured keenly observant little boy
ofttimes looking toward the heavens displaying inscrutable mien
dumbfounded look, whose furrowed brow contemplating expanse
undermined with puzzlement where multitudinous pinpoints of
light extended far into dark shadows unbeknownst to me childlike
wonder, & even mind boggling to one sexagenarian regarding deep
space comprising bajillion stars and stripes of various and sundry
animals and plants occupied where according to current scientific
understanding, the cosmos, or universe, is primarily composed of
three main components: normal matter (about 5%), dark matter
(around 27%), and dark energy (approximately 68%); with dark
matter and dark energy (drink) being the dominant constituents,
although their exact nature the stuff of an overactive imagination
such as mine conjured entities (especially more substantial when
edge of night crept across patch of property housed domain with
the address 2701 Lantern Lane, Audubon, Pennsylvania where
curious kid spent approximately the first half dozen years of his
life and hard time, and said residence I espied while returning
back to Schwenksville after the missus underwent minor routine
treatment (liquid nitrogen sprayed atop a dot over each to brow)
to stave off any potential future more serious issue with skin.

While sprawled comfortably
numb upon davenport
Iowa daily dose of poetic mishmash,
thus yours truly couches, kneads, sports...
his imponderable matted
swiftly styled balderdash
noah intent to kindle
potential ark enemy, nor abash
please pardon your
garden variety philologos,
preparing himself for backlash
he spouts nonsense words
with chutzpah and brash
his logorrhea affliction begets
meaningless rot i.e. namely ishkabibble,
where scapegoated test dummies crash
inscrutably, dumbly, busily blankly
boxing, blinking, batting... eyelash
hijacking, flouting, disregarding... covenant,
not causing corpus callosum damage
basically self made edict equals hogwash,
within one North American banana republic
predicated upon fiat gnash
trumpets blatantly non subliminal,
subordinate, subtle... ** hum
messages cuz bosh to liberty we smash
with most popular refrain
"send her/him back" cash
hearing purported dispensable
deportee with swash-
buck killing bravado
marquee, where klieg lights
blindingly broadcast in a flash.

"FAKE" mania loosed doth stall
refugees, where desperation witnesses
land of milk and honey,
perhaps some heading to Broomall,
(the hometown of Danny Bonaduce -
famous as a child actor of the 1970s
on the TV sitcom The Partridge Family)
who if necessary crawl
escaping forced *** trafficking poverty,
persecution, violence... downfall,
viz puppet government
tricked out noble (no bull) border wall
configured as demilitarized zone
hostilility spewing noxious,
poisonous, venomous gall
courtesy commander in chief
who essentially hoops to forestall
his impeachment proceedings
bristling, ranting, scathing... twitter feeds
spewing bosh raining hatred filled squall
spouting jingoistic rhetoric
atop anointed hall
of the mountain king
eerily similar to Taj Mahal
firing expletive epithets
assenting military mandating withdrawal
loosing vicious police and/or junkyard dogs
declaring no exemption against marshall
(mathers not for slim shady)
law innocence absolute zero guard
as sharp teeth nsync with flesh maul
cue hideous sinister laughter
welcome to danse macabre ball!

Gotcha! Once respectable haute cuisine thief Sue She...,
a septuagenarian renown for his trademark prank
to steal himself into a neighboring house,
and prepare an elaborate meal
unsuspectedly nabbed gorging
(ala man versus food
Adam Montgomery Richman fame
Brooklyn, New York boy)
at an undisclosed location.

When asked why
he left figurative bread crumbs
to the very doorstep of his demise
with a mouth full of food he replied
inarticulately sounding muffled,
with indistinct words
a lot of slurring
and sometimes even gurgling noises.

Always on the lookout
for new breakout theatrical talent
similar to scouts who work
across the United States,
Canada, and Puerto Rico
hunting for outstanding
gifted potential sports marvels/protegies
recruiters from various and sundry acting guilds
globe trot and zero in
on a person whose behavior
draws newsworthy attention
(perhaps to distract the public at large
to the demise of democracy
not just in American,
but a global lurge politically rightward)
presents innovative approaches to attain an objective
catches the eye of one practiced
pinpointing a money magnet.

The media drama linkedin to act of stealth
(though an inconvenience
for unsuspecting victims)
and hidden bona fides
promising positive pursuit
with proper guidance and discipline
respective negligent and criminal intruder
holds the promise
to make hand over fist moolah,
but initially said raw
(green around the gills)
unpracticed mischief maker
will be obliged to compensate
all the places and people he burgled
after he makes a name for himself,
which sudden instance
being shot to fame
does trigger copy cats,
which emulators of the original impractical joker
lack that spunky je nais sais quois,
(the only French phrase known to me)
extemporaneity, spontaneity, notoriety,
and last but not least piety
toward buttressing diversity, equality
and inclusion, thus as an
unspoken/written rule,
these innocuous dressed head hunters
of source material must not be Russian
when they Chekov
favorable qualities in a candidate
of no particular age, breed, creed,
dogma, ethnicity, gender affiliation,
nationality, physique,
race, religion, et cetera.

Lemme include you in on a little secret
(don't you telling nobody),
that yours truly (me)
happens to be sitting
within a nondescript apartment
in a little town that time forgot
and the years could not improve;
one time like when I posted to Facebook,
an unexpected countless
number of young gorgeous female respondents
(exhibited an electronic like
and untrammeled love
toward many former zany
home pages of mine
and other sundry postings –
and offered marriage sight unseen),
and by dint of instantaneously
brought down Meta -
the mysterious explanation
being overloaded three ringed circuits,
whereat Mark Zuckerberg (of all people)
requested all expenses paid trip
to be held within
the outer limits of the twilight zone -
he would fly a private jet,
where dark shadows
evoke the edge of night scenario,
a contrived atmosphere
to lend an opportunity
for each of us to portray
our favor character dramatis personae,
which stunning portrayal
of xyz - more convincing
than the original actor himself
simultaneously launched multiple opportunities
essentially catapulting one former
long haired pencil necked geek
while idling away time engaged
in my favorite pastime re:fabricating
and additionally to reminisce
about those days being a bachelor
Norwegian farmer
during his emerging adulthood,
which spanned the last
thirty plus years of mein kampf.

courtesy Facebook kindles being on cloud nine

After receiving friend request invitation
courtesy femme fatale,
an immediate and instantaneous
invisible chemical romance transpires
within the body, mind, and spirit of mein,
a boyish, coy, erudite married sexagenarian
to submissively surrender himself
as a willing subject awaiting
abduction at **** point,
and breast easy while
role playing "slave" and "master"
witnesses yours truly
binding and pledging
allegiance into thralldom.

In reality, I mimic
mild mannered modesty of Clark Kent,
each of us, whose aura, dogma,
enigma, karma and persona, et cetera
rather (rat a tat tat)
humdrum demeanor mellow fellow
long in the tooth, though I wear dentures -
thank you periodontal disease
diagnosed when less than thirty
racked up orbitz around sun,
or the half life of Matthew Scott Harris,
who experienced significant oral agony
throughout his threescore and six years
courtesy donning braces
(on two separate occasions) ,
getting healthy and local
and wisdom teeth extracted
due to overcrowding, and last
but not least maxillary osteotomy.

Upon first blush,
a veritable stranger
(hypothetically say an attractive fecund woman
of no particular age, creed, ethnicity,
gender affiliation, intelligence,
nationality, race, religion, et cetera)
would never in a million years guess
writer of these words to entertain
such, what some conservative
trumpeting republican might hashtag
as aberrant deviant ****** behavior -
and truth be told mien
strait laced heterosexual,
Norwegian bachelor farmer habitués -
especially behind closed doors of the boudoir
never incorporated anything outrageous,
but on an instantaneous whim
just came upon such out of character antics.

As a last resort,
I would settle for a nice Jewish orthodox girl,
who goes to synagogue,
likes to play board games,
take long walks along a short pier,
converse about climatological,
ideological, theological, et cetera questions
and generally down plays aesthetic appeal
versus emphasizing the intellect,
cuz rarely if ever did boyish good looks
drew the attention of one
extremely introverted, outwardly
socially withdrawn lad, who slunk along
the hallways with head down in an effort
to appear invisible, (and resorted
to anorexia nervosa to cease growing,
which merely stunted development
of body, mind, and spirit,
thus explaining an attempt
to compensate for a "lost" requisite phase
such as experiencing the dating game,
and truth be told, I overcame shyness
after learning about powder milk biscuits,
when a lovely gal named MaryAnn Sage
endured first fumbling intimate encounter
of mine capped with premature *******.

I would embellish more,
but the missus pesters me
to access Tubi web page
since we only own this one MacBook Pro laptop,
but cello phone the next best alternative.