my mind feels  like it's been set on fire
with the smoke of cigarettes that'll build an empire

i could paint you a palace of words you desire
and then back down,  weak and torn, i retire

i know sometimes i curse you with words of fire
but my love, we both know you're a ******* liar

you could drown me in
a sea of hungry sharks
or feed me to the menacing
crocs in the parks

you could smoke me like
your last cigarette
or down me like
your last alcohol bet

you could grind my bones
and play with the  shards
then mould them up again,
into clean white cards

with those white cards
you shuffle me away and tell me
"shoo"

but my heart will still,
no  matter what,
run back to you.

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder
but what the heck do they actually know?
Each day without you, my heart begins to wander
into tunnels of turmoil and bridges of woe

How can I be fond of something so far away?
How is it possible to be so devoted to
something not within reach or sight?
I wish I could tell you I miss you,
because I really do.

You cross my mind once every five minutes.
That means I think about you at least 12 times every hour.
288 times a day.
2016 times a week.

I could tell you how the glowing moon reminds me of the light in your eyes that shine every time you speak.

I could tell you how the vast ocean reminds me of your adventurous soul and how I want to discover every single part of you.

I could tell you how the song playing on the radio reminds me of the time you sang to me out of tune but it was true music to my ears.

I could tell you how the bitter cucumbers I had in my sandwich remind me of the nasty things you said to me before you didn’t say anything at all.

I could tell you how much I miss you, but I don’t.
because I simply could not.

I knew you were getting bored
of who I am and who I can be,
I knew you were getting sick
and tired of “loving” me.

I never knew why though,
Love, I wish you told me everything
and not just conveniently slip away,
like winter melts into spring.

As I close my eyes
and seal them with glue
I still envision memories
and pictures of you

As I pinch my nose
to block out any scent around me
I still feignly heave in
the smell that lingers on you (of lavender and tea tree)

As I seal my cracked lips
to prevent myself from uttering your name
I still hum to your favourite song
oh what a shame

As I cup my ears shut
and try to get used to the sound of silence
I still begin to hear only your voice
of kind words and compliance

But as I down these shots of tequila
and set my lungs ablaze
I still feel your warmth rested upon my heart.
Whatever this is, it simply never ceases to amaze.

My dearest,
I will miss you
After the morning light takes you away.

But honesty bespeaks my boredom of
Nakedness on ******,
Thrusting into you,
The screams of your pleasure-
It was satisfactory.

The soft scent of your spangled hair
As it ran playfully through my fingers
While I cradled your skull in my palm when
I caught the glitter of your smile as our bodies undulated
Through the oceans and across the galaxies
Where you dipped your toes into the cosmic pools
Before diving into the depths with me-  
then,
I felt you quiver.

Of all the arrows in the world, yours only was
Precise and lethal to the bone;
Searing straight through my universe and
Pulling it apart

To reveal not darkness, but merely the absence of light.
In it, I was not afraid.