When I say something sweet hoping it will touch her guarded heart
I panic when I hear no response
When all I see is her empty blank stare
I hold my breath
I almost wish I could take it back
I think was it too much?
That's the problem with my wandering thoughts
I sit and ponder
I dwell
It's not that I am insecure but I am afraid of loosing her
A four year crush
My one true love
The idea of us seemed so much safer

Eight years ago this weekend
My innocence was stolen
My childhood had been lost
I had been robbed of the one thing every girl can call her very own
Nothing pure left except the tears on my pillow
A unknown
A figure in the dark came by force and took it all
Took the only real thing I can call my very own
No longer a fresh blooming flower to offer
Only fifteen years old with an every girl teenage dream to give it to my chosen future lover
Broken dreams
My innocence stolen my childhood lost
Taken by a figure in the dark eight years ago this weekend

I grew up knowing I was different from the rest
As far back as I could remember
I knew I couldn't change it
I knew I wouldn't change it
I accepted who I was who I would be
That from the beginning mattered most
Everyone else's approval would have to wait
One look at my appearance said it all
It was never very well hidden
A contributing factor for when I finally said it
It came easy like a ***** roar
I came out and stood out
I would forever be proud

two days.
that's all it took.
two days without a word from you.
and you invaded my dreams.
it was raining.
the streets empty.
deserted. sad.
like a sepia toned photograph.
of you.
walking away into a garden of nothingness.
a void.
two days and i felt that void.
its intensity shocked my senses like an epicenter.
i ran after you.
shouted.
kept screaming your name.
but you didnt even glimpsed.
then you stopped.
you're fading.
like embers burning.
lighting the spaces between each glare.
i am seeing you in every direction.
sparks. flashes.
images. memory.
i am missing you.
your innocence in this obscenity.
your truth in these lies.
and your hand against mine.
then i saw your smile.
like a postcard from heaven.
but when all my inhibitions were starting to fade.
the wind blew you away.
gone.
except for one ember that kept on floating around.
i grabbed it.
a picture of your eyes.
staring.
staring at me.
i knew it was yours.
nobody looked at me the way you do.
with loving stare so inviting and assuring.
maybe in your silence i am remembered.
myabe in your silence i should remember.
i saw you in that dream.
saw you looking at me.
like no one does.
so like the embers.
i will fade away.
burning.
lighting the path.
remembering at last.
my path towards you.

early morning scavengers,
the street is their turf.
little shadows of a starving nation,
a beacon of hope on a leftover bread.
wake up, wake up Dear President.
how can you eat on a silver plate?
how can you digest a corrupted food?
put your television on, please.
for putting it off wont change a thing.
look at those ***** angels,
all smudged up and dying.
your ignorance and selfishness
are tucking their wings in.
knock, knock..open your door to them,
let them play and wallow on your floor.
let them have a taste of heaven
for a taste of New York wont make it even.
wake up, wake up you sleeping thieves.
how can you not notice?
how can you sleep?
roam around the playpen you decided to rule,
and see your toy soldiers disappearing.
as you fought for a position,
they fought with their lives.
and when you cover their remains with our flag
feel their courage you trembling ****,
see how their blood tainted our native land,
from a bullet the enemy bought from your hand.

(inspired by Former President Arroyo of the Philippines and her corrupt ways.)