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Mark Tilford Aug 2018
when there is no light
and
it is quite
i will be able to dream
silencing my screams
stopping my cries
for you

at night
when there is no light
and
it is quite
in my dreams
i will not be lonely
there you are again
my only

at night
when there is no light
and
it is quite
i will dream
it is so real
your love
again i can feel

at night
when there is no light
and
it is quite
in my dream
you appear
you are so clear

at night
when there is no light
and
it is quite
a breath i will not take
from my dream
i will not
wake
Mark Tilford Aug 2018
i check my pockets
i am out of dimes

may i borrow a dime
to buy more time
Mark Tilford Aug 2018
what we had
intense
keeping each other in suspense
our love immence
perfect
we clicked
an easy connect
even in our conflicts
so direct
but
with much respect

i am still perplexed
why God decided
it was time
he knew you were mine
why would he cut short our time
we deserved a warning sign
that with us, there would be a deadline
he crossed the ******* line
anger
does nothing but fill my mind
****** you were mine
why did he not
take mine
then he should make me blind
so i cannot see what reminds
then he should take my mind
so i cannot be reminded
take my feelings so i cannot feel
from this i will never heal
could he not hear
forever
that was our deal
Mark Tilford Aug 2018
how much did i loose
i cannot think of an excuse
for times abuse
i could tie my own noose

all chances are gone
where do i belong
i thought i could be strong

no more
is there
someone to care for

death came this way  
all i see is the color gray
i stopped being brave

the demons have raised
my mind is nothing but a maze
days and days

no one has the words
to stop the hurt
i stand at a grave of dirt

ashes to ashes
dust to dust
a must
?

the day
i died
Mark Tilford Aug 2018
of death
i do have regrets
(lighting  a cigarette)
now i get

1. not playing in the rain

2. not learning a name

3. causing tears from pain

4. time drained

5. a love not sustained

6. having some substance in my veins

7. not learning there was so much to be gained

8. always starting again

9. thinking all was my domain

10. staying wrapped in chains

etc.
Mark Tilford Aug 2018
But
I would not have anyone else
I'd  rather be by myself

Again I am headed toward the door
Thinking I cannot take it anymore
But right before
I turn around
She is setting on the floor
Crying
Telling me
There will never be anyone else
I had rather be by myself
It's not easy
We are going to hate each other at times
Baby your mine
Love is hard to define
Don't give up
Don't stop trying
Our love is not dying
Come back now
We will figure out how
Stay
Don't leave
It's not easy
But
In us, I believe
I shut the door
Baby
We have to change what was before
It's not easy
But
I would not have anyone else
I'd rather be by myself
Mark Tilford Aug 2018
(pulling back the curtains)

looking outside
looking for hope
looking for the way to cope
looking at a tree
thoughts of hanging a rope

the window
reflection of a widow
her head slopes

the window
lays
an envelope
the note
she clears her throat
it begins to rain
she whispers my name
with no blame
with no shame
i love you
the
same

the window
(the curtains close)
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