Rubber ducky
Boisterous
And plucky.

Walks around
Tip top gait
The loonies
have made
rubber ducky
President
Of the
United States.

Rubber ducky
Has a master plan
It’s ****** daft
He’s turning
Kansas into big
Lovely Bath.

Rubber ducky
Putin the fox
Best place for
Them is inside a
coffin box.

I never wrote
This  stupid rhyme
Knowing them
They’ll make it crime.
It’s turning into
a Shakespeare play
Rubber Ducky
Might send me
To Guantanamo Bay.

Rubber ducky
In my bath
Manchester United
Are signing him
This team is such
A complete farce.

What has happened
It’s such a farce
My rubber ducky
Decided he’s staying
in the bath.

Rubber ducky
Yellow and proud
He Is not suited
Yet
To play in front
Of the united crowd.

Rubber ducky
He’s not being hurt
He’s just signed
And wearing
Accrington Stanley shirt.

Rubber ducky
He
Is actually
A Man Utd fan,
Im only his guardian,
Old Trafford
at the moment
Is not in his plan.

In My army days
We came across
A castle
Me and my platoon
We’re a bunch
Of arseholes.
Across the drawbridge
Into the keep
We’ve been fighting
Not slept for weeks.
Problem was we
We’re not alone
We had come across
A ghostly home.
Our host
he was
a Friendly
ghost,
Watered and we
We’re duly fed,
None of us realised
We were all
****** dead.
We the platoon
Of skeletons
No skin on our bones
Returning from the war zone
To our ghostly home.

I miss the fog
I miss the fish
I miss the smell
Inside the dish.
I miss the voices
Inside my head
I miss my friends
who i presume dead.
I miss the patterns
That tarnish the wood,
There’s now nothing
Where once I stood.
I miss the scent
I miss the smile
On this lake
I will fish awhile

Lost and found
circles and squares
Sadness happiness
Bananas and pears.
Gingerbread candy bars
Marmalade or jam
Never make judgements
Even when you can.

Milk and honey
Food for thought
Long and the tall
Of it ,the
Fat and the short.
Frogs and toads
To perfect lovers
Don’t judge a book
By its ****** cover.

Everything is nothing
Badness  is good
Loneliness is loneliness
Just all misunderstood.

Hallelujah brothers
The salivating army
Is coming through.

They call  me 24 watts
Just a little dim.
They like a bit of banter
My proper name is
Bill.
I Have a sister
She likes to eat cake
Her name is
Victoria Sponge
And is skinny as
A shovel.
My brother Jack
Lived in a box
When you took
The lid off
He stayed
where he was.
We all had the
same mother
But had different dads
Mum just liked a change
We’re happy about this.

This sign post
Cannot be read
To late your
******* dead.