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Mark Bell Jan 19
Monday was lovely
Tuesday was fine
Wednesday was beautiful
Thursday so kind
Friday is such a nymph
Saturday was blessed
Sunday came round
I needed a rest.
Mark Bell Jan 18
Women care
About their  hair
It makes them feel good
To the male of the species
They just wish they could
Mark Bell Jan 18
Tinker tailor
Soldier spy
Opened
A laundrette
To wash and dry.
Contact this
Foursome
If you need
Something
Washed out
Of your life,
Maybe a mother in law
Maybe your wife.
Contract washing
Cleansing out
Phone the laundry
We’re out and about
Mark Bell Jan 18
Hippos and the Elephants
Arranged a charity
football match
The pitch was laid
Goals were put in
Supporters came along
Wow they could sing.
Hippos won the toss
Decided to
Kick of
Left to
right.
The whistle
blew
The game
was tight.
A slow drawn affair
Played into the night,
Sixty ***** later
Everything trampled
Insight.
The referee blew the
Final whistle and
Started a fight.
0-0 was the final score
Nine hours of play
For a ****** draw,
Next match is between
The alligators
And the lions
This is a ticket
Im not buying.
Mark Bell Jan 18
Cricket match
Between the
Giraffes and the tigers
Supporters turned up
None the ****** wiser
They mowed the grass
The distance a chain
Guess what
Being
Cricket down
came the rain,
Out came the sun
The fun began,
Top of their
Voices the
Supporters sang.
Umpire called play
It was doomed to fail
The giraffes went ate
The wickets and the bails
Tigers were angry they
Did not laugh
They went and ate those
Naughty Giraffes
The umpire drew aside
Went home and committed
Suicide
In the sun
I Didn’t know cricket
Was so much fun
Mark Bell Jan 18
I can do magic
Disappear this
Disappear That
Can’t do pulling
The rabbit out
The hat.
I’ll tell you what’s
Magic lots of fun
When me pants
Come down
And pull a hair
Out me ***
Mark Bell Jan 18
BFG
Met a little man
And his little son
Met a little girl
Met her little mum
They had a little house
It seems such fun.
They had a little garden
With flowers and a swing
With my big foot
I squashed everything.
Big friendly giant
Yes Thats me
Clumsy as ****
Don’t you agree.
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