There was once a schicklgruber
What is it in a name
In the last century
He played a deadly game.
People believed in him
They made a costly mistake
He took them down
a path of death.
They took their  slice of cake.
He was once an orator
With hatred in his voice
The world came down
Upon him
He  had no ****** choice.
Suppression oppression
You can’t keep people down
Learn from history humans
Extinction we will drown

Got myself in a bit of a mess
Insult William the conqueror
I do confess
He wasn’t pleased
He felt a bit sick
I started the war in 1066.

Spanish armada
Francis drake
I sunk all the ships
It’s just  deep fake.

Great Britain is my home
It has a mighty roar
I got up to a bit of
Mischief
And caused a civil war.

Boer war
I had to settle a score
We had a fight
We called a truce
With my mate Bruce
It was a honourable  draw.

I was on HMS Victory
Cruising up the Nile
I caused a bit of raucous
It made old  Nelson smile.

I caused the First World War
Bucket and ***** in hand
I was on holiday
Accidentally
killing my best mate
Archduke Ferdinand .

Sitting at home in 39
Bored with nothing
To do
That’s where I had the
Idea
To start World War Two

Troubled I was
I needed to play
Crossed the ocean
Went to the USA
There I concocted
My next mischievous
Plan
I got the Americans to
Invade Vietnam.

Hope I haven’t offended
With this  bravado rhyme
I just me despicable me
You got it  Im
Planning world war three.

My mate Dave
Went to a rave
Took some drugs
Now lies in a grave.

My mate Steve
On ******* and crack
Now resides in a
Mortuary
lying on
His back.

Overdose Bill
Cardinal sin
Stupid ****
Passed away
Took to much
******.

My mate John
Did it all wrong
A shot in the arm
Did a lot of harm.
He’s alive
not very well
Residing in a
Hospice
An empty shell.

Runstable woodhams
Is my name
Lost my friends
Playing a dangerous game
Many more died
Life run out of  the fire
Twist about this rhyme
I was there drug supplier.

Sweet little butterfly
Flirting with the flowers
Flying through the air
Between the April showers
Sweet nectar which you
Search
nature gives you plenty
A kiss from a butterfly
Will never leave you empty

Colours of the rainbow
Arc through your heart
Sunny days rainy days
Please hold my hand.

Waves of your emotions
Come piercing through
Your eyes
I will never question you
Please be by my side.

Loving and fire oozes
From your touch
I need the warmth
and passion
Am I asking too much.

The aroma from your skin
Sunshine from your mind
I’ll try and make you happy
Till the day we die.

My name is Van Gogh
I painted the clouds
It’s a bit of work which
I am quite proud.
My name is Marcel Deauchamp
I painted pictures of toiletry crap
It’s my painting style  Im very
Proud of that.
My name is Edvard munch
I painted the scream
Nothing about this painting
Is about what it seems.
My name is mark bell
I do painting as well
It’s like my writing
Crap.

I walked a crooked mile
Had to many pints
Of Guinness.
While Zig zag walking
It made the locals smile.
Half an hour later
Should be nearly home
Im going to have a chatter
To the big white telephone.
Late for work
Might get the 45
After a good Guinness
Session it’s good to be alive.