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Marigold Jun 2013
I once saw a Maori woman standing in the rain,
She watched me as i walked by
And smiled a little in her silence.
She has stayed with me since that day,
Follows me still
Smiling and silent
Moko carved on her chin
And greenstone hanging round her neck
Perfectly smooth
as i imagine her skin once was.
She wears a cloak on her back,
Decorated with the feathers
of slow and flightless birds,
It has no hood to protect from weather
The rain freckles her face.
She is worried,
Constantly worried,
Yet she never spoke a word,
Until one day at the beach
I lifted a shell to my ear
And from within her voice spoke to me
Saying
You do not own nature,
the Earth owns you.
She smiled and walked away.
Marigold May 2013
I dare you to love more than yourself
to embrace that around you
which you cannot understand
and to take it upon yourself
to struggle to understand it as best you can.
Marigold May 2013
She broke my Mother's heart
Before I had chance to meet it
Coming feet first and cold into the world.
She never kicked or swore
She never said NO.
Perfect sister, perfectly still.

She got so close to leaving the gates,
Like a child on her first day of school,
She approached them slowly and cautiously
Harboring a stomach of flight,
And as she moved closer she saw
Heartache and sadness in the world.

She saw pain in the world
And she turned back,
Refused to enter a place such as that.

Beautiful sister,
You remain unknown and perfect.
I sometimes wish
I had followed in your footsteps.
Marigold May 2013
I woke hungover and heartbroken,
ethanol lying thick on my breath
as the fog upon my mind.
I thought of you,
and how i'd hurt you,
and how i didn't seem to care.

It seems to be the only way for things to end.
Strange how quick the tragic ending can be forgotten,
in the presence of a bright and glimmering
potential happy ending.

Stranger still how none assume
a happy ending could be achieved alone,
as if engraved within our skulls
is the knowledge that we,
Alone,
could never be enough for ourselves.

I've been picking and choosing,
the serial monogamist strikes again!

What surprises me is that i've not yet run out of willing suitors.
I wouldn't date me.
Marigold May 2013
Colour me in and erase all doubts
That we're not living the life we ought to be.

Thoughts from a mind full of longing
Have suddenly been subdued,

I forgive you for not loving me.

My mind has been settled.
I am finding peace.
Peace within myself,
That i had hidden for years.
But now. rises to the surface,

Emerging once more in your shadow.
Marigold May 2013
She whispers something to him, my name uttered under guarded breath,
He disappears then returns with pills in his hand that  i ought to swallow,
I oblige.
We spend an evening together with floating minds,
And busy hands.
I brought round two types of cheese for us,
She had a third
So we made scones,
Triple cheese scones,
And discussed the state of our lives.
In the lounge lyric-less music spills out from a speaker,
And they sit around adsorbed by the melodies.
He stands and goes to the *****,
One they found for fifty bucks in a second hand store.
He presses a key and listens to it joining the notes already airborne.
Another stands and joins him.
They play along with the music,
Making it up as they go,
The third bangs his hands on the table, a make do drum set.
We remember our baking in time,
And it is not burnt when we take it from the oven.
The boys leave their music and join us in eating.
Marigold May 2013
She doesn't sleep when he's not by her side
But he doesn't sleep with her either.
And when they lie side by side,
She can no longer phantom the thoughts inside his head,
Like she used to be able to do.

"What are you thinking?"
"Nothing."
She moves to kiss him
He turns over to sleep.
And her heart contracts within her chest.

In the morning she wakes early and makes them breakfast,
"I'm not hungry." is all he says.
And her intestines dissolve to a paste.

He leaves for work,
And she's so sad to see him go,
She watches from the window as the car pulls out the drive.

And now she goes about her day,
Squished up heart and mushed up gut.
She cleans the house for him
Makes his bed
Folds his laundry
Gets meat out of the fridge for dinner,

Then collapses in a heap to cry,
When she finds his wedding ring
hidden in the bed side cabinet drawer.
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