i want to be a flower
to only rely
on few sources

and be loved by many
but there will be only
one who picks me

off of the ground and
smells my sweet scent
and falls in love

he will take me home
and put me in a lovely
vase with plenty of water

i have been that flower
i have been picked
someone has already fallen
in love with me

he has taken me home
and has given me
a lovely life

he's the all water
and light i need
i am that flower

we have the freedom to set foot on the scene
we are competent to stand firm on our feet
dynamistic in the battle are we
no loss to claim
for these one hundred and three

my have you guys brought these past four years
up and down our high school life
a kick start roller coaster
only to prepare us for whats up ahead

i thought high school was going to be
a complete pain in the ***
something that would change me
it was

you guys taught me
to not trust everyone i knew
to not open up to specific people
and to stand up for myself at the worst of times

you guys also taught me
that being myself is great
having a cute and annoying sneeze
or being sick

its all apart of who we are
thats what you 102 taught me
all in all
we are 103 people
who know what to do now

thank you all
for everything
i know
i don't completely know
every single one of you

but we fought this battle
together
and we can sure do it
as the strong individuals we are
and will always be

you start the day
with stretching,
yawning, trying to
wake up
what if you
can't wake up?
what if i
don't want to wake up?


maybe tomorrow
maybe friday?
how about never?
can i stay asleep?

and also the violin
all the lessons i took
i can still remember them
the special way i had to hold the bow
the way my posture had to be
the posture of a princess
the way i slowly learned the chords

i can play the guitar now
i learned pretty fast
it all started because of one song
that pulled to me like
a magnet

i can also sing
im a soprano
ive been told i have a nice voice
but i just find it
normal

i wish i could play the harp
i could play my most favorite songs
the heavenly sound of a harp
could echo through the walls of my home

but at least i can play the guitar
im happy with that

i miss your lips against my skin
i miss your teeth biting my lips
i miss my hands running through your hair
i miss my eyes taking in every inch of you
every centimeter
the way you say "i love you"
the way you watch me as I get dressed
everything
i love your hands holding mine
i love your neck, especially when it has my marks
i miss you

i still feel for you
i still hear you
i still see you
you’re my best friend
now
but now before
when the flowers were blooming

everything can slow down
but even if it does i will still be able to see you
i will see into your so called fragile soul
i will zoom into your small fingerprints
how dainty and fragile they are
i will hold them for as long as possible
our hands
meant to hold each others

life right now is good
but it would be so much better with you
if i could hold you right now it would be so much better
if i could be looking into your eyes
your lovely brown eyes
oh how it would be a million times better
your beautiful soul
how honest and pure it is

how you didn’t want to hurt my feelings
how amazing everything is when we’re together
like we don’t need anything else
i know we don’t need anything else
the truth and love is all we will ever need
honesty and compassion
thoroughness and care
patience and time
it will come to us all

life right now could be worse
i know it would be worse if i never met you
if you never existed
i know i would be dead by now
its almost as if our lives were meant to grow next to each other

life destined how your soul would understand mine so well
the stars decided how much of a pair we would be
when my mind was stuck in a ditch
you were there to help me out
while i was burying things six feet under
and possibly more
you were there to dig it back up
you were my partner in crime

either emotionally or physically
mentally or spiritually
we will all feel pain
it can come in small
or great amounts
but when it does we have
the complete choice
to fight it
or embrace it
it can be the mountains you conquer
or the bars that hold you back
whatever you choose
you'll still be
you
a human
enduring pain

it’s been a while
i never though i’d write again
let’s catch up shall we?
theres been a job i held for three years
theres a new job i love doing now
theres a want to move out and get a place of my own
theres a car that i’m in love with
theres a semester thats been finished
a few more to go

there was a guy
and another
and another
theres one right now, i really like him

there were a few pregnancy scares with the last guy
who was clearly not capable of being a father
(especially after i really sat down and thought about how much of an ******* he is)
there were lies and fights

but theres these three women and one man
that have had my back for the past two years
oh how i love them!
roman, andrea, jasmine, alexis
they light up my life
theres been drunk nights out
theres been dancing
some crying, breaking down, deep conversations
there was some hiking and parties
i would do anything for them

there was some grieving
my father
there were a lot of fights, yelling, breaking things
there were 5150s
then there was
nothing
there was a lot of crying
a lot of days taken off work
a funeral
there was an anger towards my mother because she didn’t show up

but then there was calm
there was realizing everything was going to be okay
there was a good feeling, a grand hope
there was letting go and trusting myself

there wasn’t anymore attempts to take my own life
there wasn’t anymore alcohol abuse
all the things i was doing when i was eighteen
i’m twenty two now, happy, proud, content

there was a lot of realization
there’s still going to be a lot of realization
there’s going to be a lot of growing
a lot of struggling, torment, and sacrifice
but i will get there
i am happy
but i will be even more happy
i will get there.

reading and writing
it can take you places
places beyond the horizon
places beyond the deep blue sea
places you wouldn't
imagine you'd ever be in
reading can make you time travel
and writing
it can give you that ability
to give others that feeling
of traveling through space and time
through words.