Eyes open to terror
in the algid morning.
Creeping matutinal
dementia; What
world is this?
Less recognizable
each silent morning.
Ghosts flit and fade.
Dawn's rosy fingers
clutch your throat.
So difficult to
rouse in this world
devoid of desire.
Why are there
no flamingoes?
What happened to
the exaltation
of singing birds?
Where have all
the women gone?
Each day a lesser
version of the last.
Each morning a tomb.
Be patient. Hope
the stones are rolled
away. Hope to emerge
into light. Life is
light; life uncertain;
the future not
what it used to be.
It is so hard
to wake up and
create creation
when you are
not a god.
Pretend divinity.
Pretense is where
old men go to die
and the only
way they manage
to live. Make coffee,
make images, make do.
Something or nothing
awaits.

  ~mce

I doubt,
I woke up this morning with doubt
I doubt I would ever find happiness
In a spike smoothie
I am being driven more toward;
the sea madness

I doubt I will ever take that trip to California
Or print my name on the wall of Jericho
because of the Israelites;

I doubt I would ever buy that $3000 Gucci bag
Just to empty out my account
I doubt I will ever swim in the ocean, again
my courage always rises with
every attempt to intimidate me.

I doubt I will ever walk the lonely street late at night again
If a pervert **** his mother,
No doubt what he would do to me
For him I am a sunless garden when the flowers are dead.
I doubt I would ever be able to write a sonnet, because
The feeling of frustration comes as a result
of my mixed emotional states
My parents doubted that I would have never made it this far
Because most micro preemie baby never survived

I doubt, doubt would never leave my side
Through the pain, through the doubt, here I am
today the doubtful unknown poet