Born with a million of dreams,
Then hundreds of em’
As years past it’s only
One.
Born with a ton,
Now,
None.
It’s no fun with a lot of
Precious comments and multiple
Heart dents.
Your worthy,
But it seems only your dreams is
Surrounded by a wired fence.
No matter how much you
Feel or think you will be,
It always end up leaving,
From a negative society.
So much riot,
Quiet please.
I get a glimpse of my future
It’s so much anxiety.
It hits when you feel it's a
Dream,
But it hits even harder
When you realize it’s
Reality.
Time moving slow,
But yet it’s so
Fast.
A ghetto child
With broken promises and demons
From the
Past.
With so much potential,
And healed words that’s so
Resentful,
A smile that is beautiful,
And eyes that are so
Wise,
A ghetto child
Blind to the golden
Prize.
Seeking out dreams
That leave her no place to
Hide.
Her demons is beginning,
But how long will she
Realize,
That when the evil awakens,
It’s fulfilled to tell lovely
Lies.
Living in a big world,
Where rules don’t
Apply,
And the white and black thing
Divide.
Everything is like a *****
Scheme in her
Eyes,
That’s why friends are pushed
Aside,
And family filled with strong
Unhealthy,
Dysfunctional
Pride.
It feels she was buried,
Dead and alive,
But yet her smile is such a
Gleam,
And her life is yet
Without a,
Dream.
  

                                            -Marci H.

I’m not a rapper I’m a poet.
I write from the top of my head
To the sols of my feet.
The beginnings of my poems
Is just greet.
The end of my poems
Is where I make my ends meet.
Every tune of my words,
Every sway of my voice,
Every ear of my listener,
And every tongue that rejoice,
I thank you.
My life is in this pen,
And written on paper.
My words cloud up my head like vapor.
I live in a world full of sins.
It’s like eye lens,
I seek everything.
From me to you,
You to me.
Forever in this world we’ll be.
Everything I feel,
Every soul I heal,
From my life to yours
I hope I make an appeal.
I try and shine a light,
That’s why I sit back and write.
I just thought you should
Know it.
I’m a POET.

                                    Marci H.

My demonized spirit leaves me immortal and lyric.
It wakes me as a magician, but the cross on my chest
Bring me back to my senses,
‘Marci, you’re a Christian’
I have a problem and a plan. I was kicked out of forgiveness
That read
‘Marci, you’re banned’
My messed up head, with the bible on the stand
Made me to remember all the dirt on my hands,
The blood and revenge on my mind,
The fancy cars and clothes I want to shine leave me with a death wish
With my life on the
Line.
I’m unforgiven, and sick in the head. I’ve opened up a can of worms
That always leave me stuck in my bed, eyes wide open and stuck to the
Ceiling.
I’m the mass murderer who don’t give a f..K about livin’,
And that’s exactly why I’m unforgiven, and again as I say,
I am immortal, and the only thing I’m opening up
Is a new world
In a
Portal.




-Marci H.

The helpless of my heart;
Pleads to remove these burdens.
My mind and I
Are having debatable
Conversations on whether I’m
Fine or not,
But my settings start to
Twist with my plot.
I was here,
Then there.
I’m so caught in my mind,
I didn’t notice the eye stares.
A normal day for me is rare.
Preparing myself for my long
Journey walk.
Only ashes and dust comes out
As I begin to talk.
Black is surrounding me with a splash
Of blood.
The insides of my hands is *****,
And my fingernails are full
Of mud;
From where I tried to bury;
My sins.
I try to drink my soul away
Just in case I don’t get in.
I close my eyes to a million
Memories,
Good and bad.
They flash before my eyes,
Like a movie being replayed.
The devil is feasting on me,
From Marci soul I prepared
And accidently made.
I feel homeless in time.
I feel I’ve been gone for
A decade.
Nothing will never change,
And my grin will remain false.
My pearly white teeth I smile
Will remain fault
To what’s hidden beneath.
My warm hugs I give for a greet,
Is only a cold shoulder I give
Because no one knows the
Real me.





-Marci H.

"He who loses money, loses much; He that loses a friend, loses much more; He that loses faith, loses all."
-Unknown

Todays mixed emotions for today is:
Slow,
Cold,
New,
And old,
Difficult,
And hard,
Chess play and pulled cards.
The day soaks in when I make it home
The dark hole I bury my sins,
Leaves me in the fog,
Lost
And gone.
Headache, tears.
Stress, it steers.
No words, its weird,
My breathe I feel.
My demons I ****, and no love I reveal.
Hours almost spent in the fog I fade.
I wake up reincarnated with a prayer I say,
“God forgive me for my sins, and remove my
Name from the grave.”
A few more minutes,
And it’s titled
Shower Days.

-Marci H.

I left a mark;
A stain of my love
Onto your heart the very same
Day you met me.
I took the bus home,
And you took the taxi.
We made an eye contact,
And your smile was very catchy.
I almost missed the bus,
And you almost missed
Your taxi.
I glazed out the fogged,
Uncleaned window,
And you glazed down low;
At your heart beat that steadily
Pumped.
I seen your taxi # the night
I got off the bus.
There I walked over,
And seen you sitting there.
You didn’t see me because of
Your heart beat that caught your
Attention.
The same smile you gave me;
Was the smile before your name
Was mentioned;
So I called you guy.
I stood in the street
Waiting for you to
Notice me.
Maybe if you would look up
And smile again;
This time I would've crack a grin…
But there I stood on the
Hollow, dark, gloomy, misty
Street called Maine,
And there you remained;
In the taxi car;
With your head down, looking
At your heart beat
That I stained.



-Marci H.

"Trust is the glue that holds a relationship together. Love alone is not enough. Commitment is all about trust: making a promise, a pledge, a choice to say yes to this person and no to any others, and then consistently keeping that promise. Once that pledge to commitment is broken, all bets are off. The fragile and sacred container or frame of the relationship has been violated. Trust has been broken. And broken trust is one of the most difficult dynamics to restore in relationships. Without trust, intimacy suffers. When emotional intimacy dries up, so does ****** intimacy. Defensive walls go up. Communication breaks down. Distance replaces closeness. Resentment festers. Hostility kills kindness and caring. The atmosphere turns toxic. And relationships slowly disintegrate and die."

- Stephen A. Diamond Ph.D.

The man that stood in black.
That man that was there,
When I always turned back.
He, That man,
Was there,
Standing still.
Cold as ice,
But eyes warm,
And mind so nice.
The Man In Black, and I
Spoke thru silence.
We stood there.
Eyes growing wilder in violence,
But yet the conversation
Was so sweet.
Tender enough to the point
I needed no greet.
The Man In Black,
Was hard to make of.
I couldn’t see much of his face,
Except that his teeth and eyes
Was as white as a dove.
He showed much remorse
Thru smiles, and love.
He covered me thru all of my
Hard times.
When I had to push and shove.
But The Man In Black
Was a scheme and darkness.
Every talk we had,
My silence grew angry.
My silence was violence.
My silence became a riot…
It became a riot.
A RIOT!
RIOT!!
RIOT!!!
RIOT!!!!
I couldn’t hide it.
I loved The Man In Black,
But why couldn’t he stay for long?
Why when I had problems he
Seems to always be gone?
WHERE’S THAT MAN?!
Why…
I thought I had a friend.
I just wanted a friend.
That man in black,
Was a trace of myself.
My guilt.
My conscious.
My trend.
I no longer had a friend,
That was in all black,
That man became me.
Every time I turned back.


                  Marci H.

Did you hear about the rose that grew from a crack in the concrete?
Proving nature's law is wrong it learned to walk without having feet.
Funny it seems, but by keeping it's dreams, it learned to breathe fresh air.
Long live the rose that grew from concrete when no one else ever cared.


©2pac

The scarlet letters burn thru my chest,
And leave me helpless to a bullet proof vest,
And yes,
Shame and guilt has rained upon my soul,
And thru my body.
I feel like Hester when she stood
In front of the crowd;
Shameful, and guilt.
My tears and pain I’ve
Knitted in a
Quilt;
To perfection for sinners, and the starters for
Beginners.
I have the whole alphabet across
My chest in stone.
I stand in pain by myself,
Alone;
While eyes consistently stare,
That leaves me to feel naked and bare,
With a big burn hole in my chest.
The smoke still flares the air,
So my wound is fresh.
Some people take a look at the scarlet letters,
And try to guess my sins,
But you can’t judge me, if you haven’t
Looked
Within.
The devil is laid back watching with a grin.
I’m falling deep in the dark,
Confident that God won’t let me in.
No not this time.
I can feel it.
I know,
He has given me many chances,
But the alphabets on my chest show,
The cruel and impurity of my heart.
I’ve bared pain from outsiders already.
I’m walking on the edge
Firm and
Steady,
Wishing everything will get better,
But the more stares I get,
The more burn and pain I retrieve that
Flows lightly like a feather from the bittersweet
Chest holes that remains from
The Scarlet Letters.

  

  

  
-Marci H.

It makes you wild,
In a sense of nature.
It makes you hallucinate,
In a world of clouded vapor.
You feel trapped,
And almost heartless.
you also feel thoughtless
in a sense of your mind.
It also interfere with what some people
May say,
Your grind.
It’s hard to manage.
It’s hard to control.
It’s painless,
And need none feelings.
It doesn’t care who or
What you are,
But you have to run to get far.
You have to run to catch it.
It makes you go higher
Than a rocket.
It makes you want to
Lock it-
Far away.
The ticks.
The sounds.
It’s unbearable,
By the heart beats
And pounds.
Your sweat drip.
Biting your fingertips.
Biting your bottom lip.
Paranoid.
Your losing it.
The pressure is heartless.
The pain is scarless,
But yet your scared.
Cries trapped in your throat.
Feels like when time fly
Your sorrows are on a float.
No need for a raincoat or a boat.
We’re sinking in with no floats.
Time is still high,
But I’m sinking underwater,
With a weary cry.
The tick and the tock.
The hard bottom of the ocean.
My body-
Hit that rock.
I can no longer hear the ticks.
I can no longer hear my cries.
I no longer have to sit,
And spell the word.
TIME.


                 Marci H.

The smoothest
Tree I ever seen
Was the one that caught
My eye.
I made the tree leaves
My wings,
Just to fly.
I rode by
You,
And everybody else.
I twirled around my
Problems,
And bad health.
I smiled
With the branches
Protecting me.
I smelled like
Leaves covering over
Me.
I looked like that tree,
The one that
I never seen.

-Marci H.

True love is better seen than heard,
It’s a feeling that’s untold,
An expression unfold.
A new heart that begins to mold.
It makes you believe in new
Things
Prepares your life for
A beautiful ring.
True love,
Is definitely true,
The both of you can
Make each other new,
Believe in true love,
And what it can do.

-Marci

I’m the one wearing the
Rusted gold ring,
Hypnotized by my hard cold
Tears that sting
That rolls down to my open wound
That will never close because
Of the stress I bring.

-Marci H.

The sunshine wouldn't be warm
without the cold,
and the rain wouldn't be sweet
without the drought.


-Unknown

This is just a few words of a sinner
Not now or a beginner,
Fulfilling with anger,
And in need of a healing
Finger.



-Marci H.

My demons follow me;
In my sleep,
In my head,
In my past,
And my future.
Am I known for my past?
I understand it was bad and I was
Moving to fast,
But as I turn around and start
Moving slow;
Am I recognized as the clown…
Of the show?
I feel like a homeless person
Getting rich.
Crying to myself at night
Because my problems are
Getting thick;
Which all turns out to me
Being a b..ch to everybody
Else,
Then afterwards I say sorry,
Because it wasn’t the real me,
It was just my stress that
Took over.
I’m pulling off the leaves of
A few four leaf clovers,
Just to get lucky or
Recognized for a one hit
Wonder.
I drop down to my knees,
And try to pray away my
Thunders,
But the more I try the harder
The rain,
The more I pray;
The dirtier my knees.
The harder I strive;
The louder my pleads.
The more positive things I try to feel;
The redder I bleed;
Of recognition and a pat
On the back,
Love or something,
But I just get lack;
Of claps and smiles.
I guess love in my past
Just wasn’t my style.
Am I recognized as my past in
This present?
The things that I feel isn’t
Pleasant;
For one human
Stressin’.
Its indescribable
And feel unrealistic.
I’m breaking every bone
In my back just to get some
Recognition.
I’m bursting every vain in my neck,
Just to get a pair of eyes to
See;
But I’m walking quiet in the
Storm,
Washing my tears away remembering
Where I grew up;
And living hard and rough.
I remember not caring,
And hurting my people,
But my present time is here.
Am I made equal?
I’m growing sadder and sadder.
My chest grows heavier and heavier.
My mind is over thinking;
And floods out with my
Thoughts.
I’m choking myself with
My own
Faults.
I’m wheezing helpless,
And emotional with scratch marks
All over my body,
From scratching and itching;
Just for a little
Recognition.





-Marci H.

Have you ever wondered what was beneath your sheets?
That untamed beast; that was recently
Unleashed, and ****** hungry to
Feast, which all emerged to have
The evil face of
Me.

-MarciH.

Words in a whisper
Death and a sinner,
Peace and a nerve wrecker,
Is best kept quiet
In a whisper.
Trouble told me in my ear,
That
It’s almost near.
Trouble spoke to me
With blankless
Emotions,
And little fear.
It felt cold as
Ice.
It split minds,
And rolled off its tongue
Like dice.
Every whisper
It spoke,
Every nerve it provoked,
Every strand of my hair
That stood up
With fear.
My past was
Coming,
And I didn’t have
Enough time to run,
But that whisper
Shot me like a
Gun.I couldn’t move,
I couldn’t speak.
I sat there,
As that whisper
Caused contractions
And heat.





-Marci H.

The screams and terrors of unburied souls makes
It even more believable that the devil is in
Control.
The sleepless nights that one may live
Leaves it harder to escape and even more realer to
Feel.
But, why? Is always the number one question to be asked.
We’re living in color that leaves us like sardines that’s
Packed,
Together for a new war.
We’re supposed to be getting prepared but the sins is just
More distraction and controllable, our life changes from bad to
Horrible,
And you still wonder why God haven’t closed the
Portable.
Silly and easy to say, we’re becoming slaves, and buried in an open
Grave.
Say your prayers,
For God ears are always open, and our mouths are always
Frozen.
We penetrate into temptation and fantasize about dreams that’s
Hopeless.
Your words and my words together is respoken into an open
Chant,
And a revised message that screams loud like thunder and roars
Louder than a lion
Cry,
That leaves us under the devil control. Why is always the question,
And the word that ***** the life out of our body,
That leaves us lusted
And tempted again
To ask…
Why?





-Marci H.

I’ve been mistaken
As the chosen one.
I’m not a role model.
You’re surrounded by love,
And I’m surrounded by none.
Your eyes and ears wide
Open,
Mines has never begun,
To open and spread.
I feel lonely and dead.
I feel chastised in the head.
No milk or bread.
Mama left me no choice
But to go chase this bread.
Poison ink,
And pencil led,
Notebook paper,
And eyes that’s red.
A hungry soul that needs to be fed.
My mind,
Seems to be ahead of the average teen.
No I’m not trying to be
Mean,
I just have a guilty
Heart
From what my
Weary eyes has seen.
I’m not dead,
Just been mistaken,
From the wrong way
I’ve been lead.



-Marci H.