Roses are red
Violets are blue
Who came up with this ****?
It’s not all about you

Yeah sure
I may look like
Heaven
But you?
You put me through
Hell

I overthink
I think
And even as I write this
I'm worried I'm spilling too much ink

It's a ****-show
But it's life
And yea sure
I've seen some better days
But I promise ya
It's gonna be alright

Today was crap
And I'd say yesterday's tomorrow
Looked better on the other side
But that was when the light
Was shining bright

It's a ****-show
But it's life
And yea sure
I've seen some better days
But I promise ya
It's gonna be alright

Got home from school
My head hurt like hell
My jaw was in pain
From all the stress that
Somehow I found myself
Thinking

It's a ****-show
But it's life
And yea sure
I've seen some better days
But I promise ya
It's gonna be alright

I feel asleep
Fully clothed
My head hit the pillow
And suddenly I felt my eyes close
The room was black
My thoughts were grey
Yet on the other side
I swear I could feel the sun's rays

It's a ****-show
But it's life
And yea sure
I've seen some better days
But I promise ya
It's gonna be alright

Alright?

I could have died
A couple of times
I took my eyes off the prize
But instead I stood up
And took my future in my hands
Now everything remains steadfast
In my eyes

It's so hard
To stop pulling out my own hair
Ughhhhhhhh
Why can't I just let it grow?
Why can't I let people comb it
Let friends braid it?
Why not?
Because I have
Because I have no
Because I have no stupid hair
And god it's just so hard
To stop pulling
And screaming
And crying
And becoming fustrated
Promising to stop
To stop pulling
And then
Just wait
Despite my
Best Wishes
It all starts again

Im so tired of fighting
For a while I just can’t think
I laugh the loudest
Who’d have known?
16 just held such better days
Days when I still felt alive
And nobody knows me
And nobody gives a ****
I keep my head up right
But I don’t sleep
I don’t sleep
I don’t sleep til it’s light
I just wanna close my eyes
And forget what’s in front of me
Give me your eyes
And let me see the sunshine
Just give me your eyes
And I’ll believe in anything
I’ll try my best to keep my head up right

I cannot articulate
What it means
For me
To feel
Things?
No words
Do justice
To what’s going
On in my head
No one else
Can read my thoughts
My pages are sealed
My stomach in knots
So the only thing
That’s left for me to do
Is listen to music
For me, at least
It’s the only thing
That rings true

I’m getting bored
Of all this yawning
I can’t fall asleep
So I’m hoping that if I write my thoughts down in ink
I’ll simply stop thinking
And
Fa
   aa
       ll
Fast asleep

I suggest you look at the news once in a while
Or save your soul
Find only gold

I thought you should know
That I’m going into surgery
They’re not going to put me under
I’m just going to listen to music
Let my mind wander
I'm not looking forward to this
At all
That's the truth
Pure amd simple

God doesn't have the best ******* plans anyways
So why does everyone try and hide
What's really on their mind?
When I get back
I'll unwind

It’s hard to fall asleep
With wet tears running down your cheeks.

When you have low serotonin levels.
When you have low serotonin levels, exercise has never been more important. Unfortunately, all the shaking from said unknown anxieties doesn’t count.  So instead I usually find myself on a bike pedalling furiously away from all my problems.  Or I slip on a pair of sneakers and sprint away towards the greener side.
When you have low serotonin levels, sleep has never been more needed. Sadly, this doesn’t seem to come easy for someone like myself. For some unknown reasons, I can’t get my eyes to shut.  I can’t turn my brain off and my thoughts run wild.
When you have low serotonin levels, coffee has never sounded any better. Coffee seems to cause my shaking to simmer when for most others it would go out of control.  Nothing too sweet, just enough to trickle down my throat. Afterwards, it’s like the fog has been cleared.  The best of course is shared with friends on a cobblestoned street in Europe.  Watching people pass by with smiles on their faces.
When you have low serotonin levels, music has never been more relaxing. Suddenly, all the thoughts are drowned out by someone else’s worries. Instead of my foot bouncing anxiously up and down from nerves, there’s a beat.  If you can give me music to listen to, then you can hear the beat of that rather than the non-rhythmic beat of my anxious feet.
When you have low serotonin levels, friends are the light in a world full of shadows.  They allow me to laugh and smile.  They are what push me to not be afraid.  I talk to them, and suddenly I’m more myself than I have been in months.  I’m laughing, I’m smiling. I’m making jokes.  When I do cry, I have them to lean on.  And I’m forever in their debt.
When you have low serotonin levels, optimism is key. You have to believe you see.  Try and wake up and smile.  Love yourself and those around you. Laugh until your stomach aches.  Cry until a small river has been made.
These are the thoughts from an anxious worrier.
And I don't want to tell you. I don’t have to tell you. Things could be different and I could be somewhere else. But no. Instead I am here.
I don’t want to have to tell you. But maybe you should know.

Get me out of here
I need to leave
This year
Please help me learn to breath
All the air has been taken from me

The day goes by
Faces flicker past
All I feel is fear
Please help me learn to see
What's beyond this veil
The shades been drawn
Yet nighttime is all but gone

I come home from work
Shaken to the bone
Long day of meetings
Food was a waste of time
And all I feel is fear
Please help me learn to sleep
I'm so tired
Please

I wake up from this
Dream?
And all I see is me
Happy and sweet
All I feel is peace
Please keep me here
Never let me leave

I'm tired
I'm tired of the hate
That seems to burn through the veins
Of the villains who hide in the dark

I'm tired
I'm tired of the infinite cycle
Of avoiding the newspapers
But peeking at the news
With a terrible sense of dread

I'm tired
I'm tired of watching humanity
Wade through the lava
Coming straight from hell

I'm tired
I'm tired but I do believe in good
I do believe in hope
Hope really is the things with feathers

I may not be able to solve all the problems around me
But I can solve the ones in my head
I can speak my mind
Make sure my voice is heard
Show my support
For the things I love

Demand justice
Live life to the fullest
Make a difference in this world

After all
Like one of my heroes
I believe that the best things,
The richest things,
Aren't supposed to come easy

The tide is high
My emotions raw
My tears are full of salt
Yet I’m hopeful because
I know this river
Is all just
nature’s fault

What a time to be alive
The seasons changed
And I survived
I laughed
I cried
For I'd survived

I wrote my heart out
Hoping that one day
The world would strive
That peace would come
That hate would die

What a time to be alive
The seasons changed
And I survived
I laughed
I cried
For I'd survived

I walked to school
My back to you
For I knew
The time would come
To say goodbye

What a time to be alive
The seasons changed
And I survived
I laughed
I cried
For I'd survived

I ate my lunch
And thought how best to dine
With my friends?
Or my pensive mind instead
I chose the later
Hoping to answer
What might come next

What a time to be alive
The seasons changed
And I survived
I laughed
I cried
For I'd survive

After lunch
I made up my mind
I found my friends
And then I said goodbye

No not to my friends
They're too close to me
No I said goodbye
To all the uncertainty

After all
What a time to be alive
The seasons changed
And I'd survived
I laughed
I cried
For I had survived

Whenever I listen to music
It’s hard not to place myself in the lines
It’s hard not to sing along like the focus is really all on me
Whenever I read a book
It’s hard not to jump into the chapters
Swipe the narrator off the page
And become the true hero of the book
Whenever I write
It’s easy to get lost in my world
Swim through the fantasies that cloud my own thoughts
I think that’s what life is all about
Find yourself in others
Be compassionate and kind
Make your life yours
Have no regrets
The end

It's a wonderful day
To be alive and smile
Take heart and breath in
The air that's
Wide and full of joy

Blisters on my feet
Tongue sticking to my teeth
This is how I feel
After a day
Competing in Speech

I’m too tired to think
But I don’t sleep a wink
Yet honestly
That’s okay with me

Before you can get good at solving puzzles, you must first master the riddle of yourself.
Otherwise, what's the point of solving mysteries if you yourself are one?

Sometimes it’s nice to know that whenever you wake up at night seemingly alone, there’s a whole other world awake.

I don’t know why I’m crying
All I can feel are the rivers of tears pouring down my face
My teeth chattering from all the shock
That brings my body gasping for air
For I can’t breath
Knowing that I had not received
An invitation to happier dreams

The minds and souls of the characters in my books are often more real than the brains behind the books. Hence, this is the reason I much prefer to read than to interact with the world around me. Some might argue that if I were to interact with my surroundings, I would get more out of it than the ink on the paper of my lovely books. Though I would argue that one must interact with a book to engage in one, and therefore one gets more out of it in the long run. Whereas the world that surrounds me, I can choose what I wish to interact with. Books automatically **** me in down a tunnel of well... you know...

Will I be missed when I am gone
Or will my ghost just linger all alone
Will my smile be forgotten
Will my laughter simply whisper
Between the shadows that hide my soul
Maybe I'll just be a twinkle
In the dark twilight of tomorrow's sorrow

I got so tired discussing my future
My body decided to shut down
Afternoon of silence and nausea
Shaking sweating I can't get up
So I lay on the hard cold floor and
Tell the world to shut the hell up

One day I want to write a book
The problem of course is that so far most of the chapters are and
Will forever be unwritten

Of course, no lyrics are ever unintentional
Though I think bands have a tendency to touch on big themes without really following through on them or linking them to particular logic
As one of my favorite bands once noted
Your blood
Your bones
Your voice
And your ghost

I woke up today
Feeling more like myself than I have in months
Therefore, it was a really good day
I was surrounded by people who believe in me
Who care about me
Who love me
People who share my interests and let me believe and inspire in anything
And I am so grateful for that❤️
And I started to cry
At the end of the day
Right now...
Realizing how lucky I am
How my now is not my forever

Kick Drum Beat
Kick Drum Heart
My favorite musician once told me with all his heart
To let music take over art

One of my favorite writers once said
How can anybody have you
How can anybody have you and lose you
How can anybody have you and lose you and not lose their mind too
I'm still trying to answer these questions
They may not make sense, at least not right now
Though I suspect that eventually
My mind will come to its senses and
Formulate some sort of answer

I'm not sleeping
I'm not eating
I'm barely breathing
Am I really loving?

In my sleep
I barely move
Shadows persist
Nightmares insist

What I eat
Is mostly in between
Nothing makes sense
Anymore

This isn't living
I must be dreaming?

Turn the dial and I promise you I'll try hard and smile
Everyone needs an oil change once in a while
My thoughts have become greasy
Almost uncontrollably twisty
Until at last it becomes one big tunnel
And suddenly they go turtles all the way down...
Still, if you do end up turning the dial
I promise you I'll try hard and smile

Listen!
I want to listen to more
Music
Friends
Family
Mentors
Perhaps most importantly
I want to listen to myself more
I guess I'm worth something too?

It's okay
It's alright
We all fall asleep
Eventually
At some point
Either day or
Night

When your jaw hurts
Because your mouth aches
Because you can’t quit faking
The smile that runs permanently across your face
The facade isn’t going to last forever you know
The stress insists
And you try so hard to resist

Waiting impaitently for my thoughts to slow down
My hands and feet are shaking uncontrollably
Sweat is dripping from my face
As I lay down in an awkward position
With no energy to save my dignity
I fall asleep
Into more thoughtless spirals
Into a world filled with the blissfully naive
Unconsciously I'm humming
In my sleep
My world has shut down
And the world on the other side of the veil
The one we call our eyes
Is coming down upon me
There's no stopping it
I can't fight
I wish I could just
Stay asleep

I'm a writer
I'm a reader
And above all I'm a dreamer

I realize that usually what I'm reading is purely fiction
That doesn't mean I can't install hope into the characters
That bounce off the pages and flash into my eager eyes

It matters not what I'm writing
As long as hope is contained within the ink

I look into this world
And not enough people have their noses burried into books
I strive to immerse myself into the world
It doesn't matter if it's in a notebook or book
I'm just going to keep on dreaming

I was looking back at my journals
And all the writing on the pages were smeared
Not from the ink that was never supposed to disappear
But from all my tears
That had supposedly fallen down my cheeks
Splashing carelessly onto the paper
Smearing emotions and complaints and all the hope
That I had acquired over the past year