She kept waiting for him
She kept trying to find him in every next man she was with
She never found him in any of those men
She kept searching for him
Did she find him or not??  
How could she find when she itself didn't know who He is

You will only fear
When its not yours

Everyone wanted him
She wanted him the most
All that matters was who he wanted
And she waited and wanted him to want her all his life

Her pain was usual
But this time it hurt her

She wrote poems when couldn't speak out
Her language were words on a white sheet
She wrote her feelings in Red
As everything she felt almost killed her
Non could relate to her poems
As she prayed non should feel the way she did

-

I draped your moonbeam heart
in a misty clouded veil
and sat on the dark side
keeping all of it its light to myself

Happily I waited for the stars to take notice
as I gazed out across the ebony skies
that now stared back in an empty silence…
suddenly I felt all alone

But I had the light, this beautiful,
loving, warming and enchanting glow all to myself
How could I feel alone, I had you,
what more could I need

Then I saw you were crying but I didn’t know why…
The light became dimmer with each tear that flowed
until it was now so dark I could barely see
“Please tell me why you are so sad?”

“My darling, it is true, the light of my heart
shines brightest for you, but there are others
who need its light as well and without it
their sadness becomes my sadness”

A chill ran across my skin at a speed not previously known
My heart began to break as I realized my error…
I felt selfish and ashamed, so I quickly lifted the veil
to share her wondrous light once again

When there before my eyes a billion stars began to glow
and so did her heart, brighter than before
We were contented as the universe rejoiced
for finally I could see…the dark side all along was me

12/10/2012:
A very mellow day,
A day that makes one’s golden years actually golden.
Happy in retirement?
There’s a joke:
You slave like Spartacus in the Libyan salt mines for 30 or 40 or even 50
years, and now you’re supposed to re-calibrate the machine, re-gauge
one’s anatomy and metabolism for a habitat so far and away grindstone
gone.
The muckrakers Studs Terkel and Barbara Ehrenreich remind us:
Work is the only thing we can do for 8 hours, other than sleep.
Perchance even to dream out that Roman **** or Bacchanal.
No, alas, 4 hours is the legal limit for an ******* lasting that long,
During all our joy-juiced carnal desires,
Be they under the elms or elsewhere.
Cialis! ******!
Names already living it up in infamy.

A simple truth about Retirement:

Stop working and die.
A most intense public service announcement,
A vast digital image out of Yeats,
A very special Spiritus Mundi P-S-A.
Targeting Baby Boomers, especially:
“You better find yourself something,
Or someone to occupy your mind.”
Brought to you by the good people at
OCCUPY BRAIN STREET,
First a national, then a veritable global movement,
However so short-lived;
Like all the others.
Oh, Boomers, your attention span is down to 8 minutes.
Your mnemonic links are frayed and tattered,
Your hard drive noodle fragmented,

Yet still whirring white noise jazz.
A New Orleans Dixieland funeral,
And Al-Zheim trumpet blast to go out on.

Well, I don’t know about the rest of you,
But I am relatively well adjusted in retirement.
And today—previously mentioned as a mellow day--
Today is one reason why.
As is medical marijuana and the sultry voice of Chrissie Hynde,
With or without her band of Pretenders.
And let’s throw in a lovely bottle of Temecula red wine--
Doffo, if you’re going to get fussy on me,
Another blithe distraction cultivated and custom-made for old age.
Indeed, a very mellow day.

It's hard not to love you
And I know it should be easier now that your gone
But in truth it has only gotten harder
It's like you have knowingly trained me to miss you
And all this hot weather has got me wanting to take a swim in your eyes
Craving the affection I never really received
I imagine that I know what your lips taste like
It's like watching someone eat something you are allergic to
And you have never had it yourself, but you imagine it's wonderful
Loving you was the easiest thing I ever did,
Even when it was hard it was easy
Loving you was like breathing
I am watching you fall in love with her and
I am watching her fall in love with you
And while I am watching you fall in love with each other
All people can do is ask me if I am okay
This world is no place for people with hearts
Not when we give them away so easily
And yet knew this and still loved you
I loved you anyways