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270 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
You want to know who I am, well sorry friend I'm not,
We should've talked so long ago, I'm sorry I forgot
You want to save me from myself, but sorry you cannot,
So just leave, just close the door and leave sorry me to rot
268 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
Everyone needs someone
Because I know we all run
And we'll need somewhere to go to
Or not somewhere really, but somewho
267 · May 2014
Untitled
M May 2014
What is today but the day before tomorrow?
What is living but spending time we have borrowed?
What is a bird but feathered wings and a song?
What is a man but divinity and wrong?
265 · Jul 2017
Distance
M Jul 2017
Reach out to me as I reach for you,
Tell me you want this too

I've never lamented that this world was so big until I realized it meant I could be
apart from you
264 · May 2015
Untitled
M May 2015
I want to build things, I want to be someone who brings
New things into existence, someone who has given up all resistance
To denying who they are, so that I can make it far
Enough to find the end and away enough to be a friend
To those to scared to ask
263 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
You know you're growing older when there's no more comfort in sleeping in your mothers bed,
And everything is confusing and complicated and so, so loud inside your own head,
But you know you're growing stronger when you head into the dark alone and found
Yourself actually trying to find the volume button, and turn all the pounding, the screaming voices,
down
260 · May 2014
Love
M May 2014
I have a friend
Who believes
Love,
To love,
Is selfish
But I don't
See
What is selfish
About seeing
You with
Her
About seeing
You kiss
Her

And letting
It go

Letting go
The lies
You told
Me,
The way
You broke
Me
So that you could finally be
Happy
258 · Sep 2014
Untitled
M Sep 2014
Recently ive only been comfortable sitting in a ball hugging my legs closer to me
i even sleep like that
So Small
And in English class i saw you wanted me to read my writing out loud,
Kept asking anyone else while covertly glancing my way, seeing me shrug my shoulders up, sink into my seat and hide behind my hair,
And i know you were dissapointed in me, and i am so sorry, you're the only one who ever came close to thinking of me, you're the
only one
And im sorry i just can't do it
what if i was wrong or i confused people, or what if they looked at me and listened to what i wrote and then they weren't just looking at me they were seeing and i was wrong?
i know i was wrong, i always am
im sorry
and i know you would tell me i couldn't be wrong, and to face my fears, but at least im facing one,
ive always been facing one,
im so alone, there are people in my life but they don't know me,
i cant tell people and they can't see without my help
So ive been living out one thing that terrifies me my whole life
im completely and utterly alone
But for some reason, i don't think that would make you proud
it would make you sad
For me
And i don't know what to do
Because more than anything i want you to be proud of me,
But i can't show people me
i cant
But i also don't know if i can go on alone much longer
You are the only one who has ever been close to seeing me
i am so sorry
258 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
I have lost people, people I loved,
They went to better friendships, or to somewhere above,
And I can see why they'd leave me, I mean I'm barely sane,
And what little I had lost a lot another had gained,
I guess I just never thought I'd be alone within,
But I guess how else can I atone for my sins?
256 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
I think I need a break,
Everything here tears me down and rakes
My heart, and these wounds do not close,
I am an ant and life is a rose,
I try to climb to that sweet fragrance
But there are thorns to impale me and the other ants
Put me down, I'll never get to the soft red petals,
And right now if life were cars, I'd be in a rental,
And it's due the next day,
And I'm out of money, what could I say
Besides yeah you're right ok
256 · Sep 2014
Untitled
M Sep 2014
Leaning on a sliver stallion,
staring at the receding sun,
Prepared to face that ghost battalion,
That long ago has left me numb,
Each second seems to stay a year,
But flees for fright my coming fears,
And leaves me in the dark alone,
To watch and wait for what I've known
To come, to take me, they haven't yet,
But everytime I see the hint of a shadow, I'm reminded. They won't forget
254 · Feb 2014
Gone
M Feb 2014
Look at how it glistens in the morning light
It was just blown and now takes off in flight.
It catches the breezes and goes where it pleases
But sadly won't last too long
The bubble you blew
Blew your heart into
Is now
Forever
Gone
254 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
tick                     *tick
             tock                    tock
The clock strikes twelve
And I delve
Into thoughts
I thought I forgot
But here they are
Gold and marred
Crying and dying for
I can save but one before
They're gone
252 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
I've started to draw
A self portrait,
But I'm scared to really see
How I perceive myself
252 · Jan 2015
Untitled
M Jan 2015
Why are beds so great?
Because they are soft?
Is it because curling up under a blanket in them subconsciously reminds me of the womb?
Or the times when I was much younger, and another could be with me and nothing would be weird at all?
Is it because deep in my heart, I'm a romantic, and I think about the person who I will love above all else, and who will feel the same to me, who will share my bed and my soul?
Maybe I'm overthinking things and it's just because bed is a comfortable place to be, but (this will probably sound strange) my thoughts of my bed or the feeling I have going to sleep feel more substantial than that
Maybe I just love sleeping
I probably just love sleeping
But maybe I love this mattress too
249 · May 2014
Dream
M May 2014
In my dream
I drew a picture
Of you
And smiled
Because even though I messed up,
Like I always do,
You would still hang it on the fridge,
And tell me you love me,
Like you always do
Who are you?
248 · Sep 2014
Untitled
M Sep 2014
I wish someone could show me
That I'm not alone
245 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
I heard a word that stirred my soul,
My heart, lips part, words start to roll
Off of tongue, the beauty sung hurt my lungs, breathe,
I remind myself, crying I find myself, it meant to grieve,
To smile, to walk a thousand miles on hot coals,
It drains a straining heart then a second later makes it full,
It surrounds us, it confounds us, leaves us bound to one another,
It gave me what might yet save me, bound me to all my brothers,
I regret how I forget things so fast, things that came from up above,
But I just woke and finally spoke that once forgotten word,
It's already fading, please come back to me,
Love
244 · Sep 2014
Untitled
M Sep 2014
I think I understand now,
What you're trying to say, how
You need to save yourself, please friend,
Do so, stay alive, and so will I, I'm not ready for my end,
I will continue, though as we both know,
Everything changes, as if fate intended to throw
Us, cut us down from our feet,
And while we are down, rest your soul, sleep
If that is what you need, but I,
I can't stay, every second spent is paying to writhe
On the bottom in agony,
No, I cannot sleep, there will be no rest for me,
And I don't need you to fix me, I just needed someone who could understand,
No one else can save me, it must be by my own hand,
But know this, remember it when you awaken,
No matter what happens, you are my friend, I know you are, I know I'm not mistaken,
So I will get up, no matter how hard it will be,
Suffering into the truth, I must suffer to find me,
And maybe when you wake up I'll actually have done it,
I won't be alone, and you'll smile and Make me sit
Down and tell you how I did it,
How I found home
I never meant for you to feel you had to do anything for me.
I'm sorry
232 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
I would like to help someone else,
Because then I might finally feel like I mattered
230 · May 2014
Untitled
M May 2014
If I were
A dog
I would be
The type
That runs
Away

If I were
A bird
I would be
The type
That sings
All day

But I'm
Just
A girl,
The type
That writes
To pray
229 · May 2014
Solitude
M May 2014
Summer is great because
I get to choose
Who
I am with
Instead of being forced
To be social
And when I get to
Choose
I can choose
Myself
226 · May 2014
Untitled
M May 2014
My eyes swirl blue and green at the edges, but from far away
They look grey
And all around the dark centers, they are guilded with gold
Just like this world I so desperately want to explore
Just like me
I have weird eyes
225 · Feb 2014
Untitled
M Feb 2014
You told me today that yesterday you heard a mockingbird
It was outside on a tree singing its song, so you pulled out your bird whistle -that you keep in your purse for emergencies- and started to sing along
It looked down at you but kept singing and you sang with it for about thirty minutes
And then it flew away
I heard you tell her you can hear the trees, their pleas rang through your ears and cut your heart in two when the forest over yonder was cut through
And you told me to fall in love with something today, anything, you fall in love everyday
A word, a phrase, that bird, but I've been in a haze
Too entranced to notice anything except you
This beautiful person is so innocent but wise, I want to be just like her when I grow up. She is teaching me about myself, and I honestly can't comprehend how someone so beautiful can exist on this earth
222 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
I'm walking down an empty path,
Breaking in earth as I try to last
The tears, the pain, the broken smiles,
But fear remains, though I've walked for miles,
My head pounds harder and my skin is numb,
The air is frost now, the shadows come,
The ghosts of my past have found me
Old hopes and dreams surround me,
Along with the others I had left for dead,
They wail and they scream and inside my head
The pounding gets louder, it grows and it grows,
And the shadows come closer, there's no where to go,
They're all around me now,
And they've bound me down, how
Did they find me, I thought I was gone,
Why did they bind me, it has been long
Enough for them to forget,
And the pounding gets louder still, and yet,
They are quiet as death,
Empty, staring, watching my breath,
How did they find me alone in this wood?
I guess shadows follow, as follow they should,
For without darkness there can be no light,
But these are too dark, and large in their height,
I can't see past them, to dark I succumb,
They have found me and bound me,
And now I am numb
222 · Aug 2014
Untitled
M Aug 2014
I've been told contradictions don't exist
So why in the pit of my being is there a void and a mound of lead all at the same time?
219 · Nov 2014
Untitled
M Nov 2014
I think it's strange
How people all need eachother
We're like little love parasites
Feeding off our brothers
And I don't know why we need it
I guess our souls get hungry too
And you know, I'm kind of lonely,
And I need some love from you
219 · Sep 2014
Untitled
M Sep 2014
When love is cause of sorrow
When today longs for many tomorrow
When seconds are a second too long
Even in silence is a song
215 · Aug 2014
Untitled
M Aug 2014
I don't know what I want,
I don't know who I am,
And I don't know why I am, for that matter,
I don't know what's going to happen,
Or what should,
But I do know,
Without a doubt,
You deserve to be happy,
And if they don't make you happy, run like hell, because that's the only way you're gonna get out
195 · Sep 2014
Untitled
M Sep 2014
The star fell,
Children pointed as it plummeted,
And it was terrified,
It didn't know what was happening,
It didn't know why,
And the only things it thought it would meet wouldn't be very helpful,
The ground, and death,
And as it fell, its light faded,
And a swirling mass of silver and gold remained,
Still falling,
The ground was almost upon him,
But it looked like it was going to pass down through a whole building first,
It went through the roof,
Strange he thought,
I just went straight through, it didn't break,
It fell through a room where a lady in a cast was watching jeopardy,
And a room where it saw a boy with no hair, eating a cup of pudding,
The next room confused him the most,
There was an old man, hooked up to lots of devices, and him in all his blankets looked like a wrinkled pea in a pod,
Who seemed to see it fall, and smiled as it went,
One of the imensest joys it would ever forget,
And in the next room, there was a woman
Her belly was large, and she was crying,
And a man dressed in white stood at the foot of her bed,
Just push he said
You're doing great
And on her side there was a man,
Whose hand she clutched tightly,
Who told her you're okay, Cheryl, you're okay
And the doctor said here she is
And held up a cute little thing
She was screaming and her skin was red,
And now it realized it was going to hit her,
Tried to move but couldn't,
And it entered the little girl's body,
But it didn't go through like it thought it would,
It stayed,
And when the little girl opened her eyes, the light it thought it had lost shined in them like two new stars were born
186 · Nov 2014
Untitled
M Nov 2014
The sun feels nice on my skin through the car windshield
As I sit in the grocery parking lot
And the leaves are that yellow-green and red color,
Still hanging on to the trees
And I am sick as well as alone
But I can see my mother walking towards me
And I know she will come sit beside me
And she will take me home
186 · Oct 2014
Untitled
M Oct 2014
Others laugh, my voice is silent,
Others dream, my minds more violent,
Others see, my eyes are clouded,
Others smile, my minds too crowded,
But others are themselves, as I should be
I could learn a lesson from them, learn to be me
185 · Apr 2014
Untitled
M Apr 2014
Good for her, she finally found a boy worth keeping
Good for him, he finally found another soul for reaping
Good for me, I'll finally get to be alone in my weeping
Good for us
174 · May 2014
Untitled
M May 2014
A city of the dead in the middle of the living
Reality existing just outside a vision
170 · May 2014
Untitled
M May 2014
This palace
With its
Floors of gold,
Mirrored walls,
And
Ceilings of glass
Allow me to see
Nothing
But
What I care not for,
What I have become,
And where
I still
Need
To
Go

— The End —