here's how it happens the morning after you reach into the drawer where the your t-shirts live to find it austere you'll shrug because you're still drunk & you can't remember when last it was that you had something wet or how long it's been since you made the floorboards blush or why the carpet is upset who wouldn't be the contents to the upended ashtray strewn around the apartment resemble the aftermath of the smallest war to ever take place in norfolk some midnight thief must've made off with the lighter because it isn't in any of your favorite spots maybe you chucked it along with a hundred other things that make noise when they land in the neighbors yard you won't remember putting the refrigerator's belongings in the bathtub or scrawling a buzzard on the bedroom door but then again who would you'll pretend it's spring again before putting on your winter coat to go out front with a cigarette in your mouth you'll hope for a passing stranger to *** a light from or drag yourself to the corner with couch cushion change to buy a new lighter and on your way you won't bother looking back this is just another day on eggshells for no reason another november choking on birthday candles on your way home you step over beer cans the kind you fell in love with and wonder who had the last laugh last night or if anyone said a word at all it might've been another moment of clarity it might have been some idiot savant any adjective that feels like home anything that keeps you thirsty
the final leaf drifts off an oak tree as the snowflakes wait on the cloud's starting line far above, hoping to be the first one to hit the ground and win against the Fall
I shouldn't be the one to have to tell you this There was no need for anyone to finish that sentence I knew what had happened
They found you in the car With our family's dog The garage door sealed shut Car still running Spewing toxic fumes
A huge anvil came down and knocked my feet out from under me
My sister and I collapsed onto the floor It felt like someone was tearing me apart One piece at a time Like someone had punched a hole through my chest Ripping out my heart to burn and crush into the ground
Our worlds seemed to collapse around us, I had to hold my legs so tightly to my chest to prevent myself from falling apart right there on the floor
I didn't have a mother anymore She is not going to see me graduate She is not going to help me pick out my grad dress She is not going to meet my first true love She is not going to be there when I have my first drink in a bar She is not going to be there when I show her my engagement ring She is not going to be there when my father walks me down the isle She is not going to be there when I announce that I'm pregnant She is not going to be there when my first child is born She is not going to be there to be the most loving grandmother She's gone
Old Bones planted in a crooked straight line watered with the tears of Sycamore trees, headstones bend under the weight of time letters slowly falling like leaves