Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
74 · Sep 2023
Anarchist.
Louisa Coller Sep 2023
I've tempted my rebellious mind,
But I lost my sense of wrong and right.
That can be abused in a world,
of white/black thinking.
Learning to be an adult,
Not a kid innit.

I don't want to be the right and wrong,
I'm a deep grey mush trying to grow up.
Your poison filled me, like a sadistic goodbye,
I'm sick and tired of wasting my own time.

Hold them closer, people ask me,
But I ain't here to suffocate nobody.
Try to analyse my life with checklists,
But I'm managing fine, just let me.

Not everything can be written down,
I just wanted to learn to let it all out.
I feel like a fool living in this game,
I wonder how much my palms will take.
73 · Mar 13
Better Than This
Louisa Coller Mar 13
Fiction helps keep a lot of us sane,
Making up stories almost day-to-day.
Though fiction seems rational,
reality is off the rails,
Absolute madness everyday.

Picture frames in a home are lucky,
When this is all temporary for us.
We are comfortable and happy,
But they'll take - It's a 'must'.

Overanalyze my medical history,
As you let me down for years.
I've screamed for help forever,
You just silenced the child beneath this.

I fall in love with victim's of war,
Becoming comfortable is temporary.
As others experience hellscapes the same,
You show little care for anybody.

Sick to the core, coughing my lungs,
I want to sing and be free but it isn't enough.
One day I'll succumb and what do I get?
Nothing. But I deserved,
Better than this.
73 · Jun 2022
Hurt One
Louisa Coller Jun 2022
Killing inside from how I've been,
I can't imagine the pain...
Mustered from your lips.
73 · Jun 2022
Rumoured Love
Louisa Coller Jun 2022
Moments in the dark with you,
I can't deny that they mean so much.
Chances are you may know,
How insanely fast the rumours fly.
All I ask is that you believe,
Even the most silliest things.

Love is wild and crazy like that,
I love more than I ever have.
72 · Jun 2022
Chanced
Louisa Coller Jun 2022
I'm sorry,
I can't help this, it's something I keep saying to myself.
I'm just very afraid,
Of what anyone has to say.
On one hand you hurt me,
On the next, I don't want him to.
Your love was all I had left,
When my life met a sunken end.

He was never given a chance.
71 · Sep 2023
Hope.
Louisa Coller Sep 2023
I'll get to sleep and stay strong.
71 · Nov 2020
Remembering You.
Louisa Coller Nov 2020
Across the seas,
where you once breathed,
Is where you left your body.

Some in water, some on land,
Some buried in Belgium's grounds.

British soil beneath my feet,
Your brother's return is why I'm here,
We sunk, we fought and exist today.

Thank you, for everything.
71 · May 18
A Whisper To You
Louisa Coller May 18
You wonder why
My words are little
In a world so large

Because I sing constellations
Universes, planets and solar systems
To even get a whisper to you.
71 · Jan 10
Wicker Man
Louisa Coller Jan 10
Push me aside,
I'm an obstacle, right?
You need that goal so tempting, so rich,
So you push me aside.

A red flame, a blazing blitz,
A rich burn consuming my skin,
Your droplets of hopeful flames,
Dance my skin to remains.

How many times can the wicker man burn,
Before the glow within my lava flow,
Rips to bits pouring through.

A love with a mother of the unknown,
Treasured flowers and vanity growth,
All left as I'm pushed aside, placing duty above pride.

Thought I was a phoenix but maybe I'm dumb,
Each burn and cut left me further undone,
Screeches of serenity, mental abuse,
It wasn't just you.

How many times must I burn,
Before my flesh turns to bones.
It's very clear I'll take no more,
It's about time my hand shows.
71 · Jan 2022
Heart Beat
Louisa Coller Jan 2022
If you were a song I haven't written,
I anticipate the day I can sing it ...
For the clanks of a pan,
a simple rhythm.
Cannot compare,
To your intricate pictures
Of a simple smile
Warming my heart.

It rips me apart,
Throwing me off track,
But it feels like I can
Breathe again.

My love, my dear, though you may not love me today.

Maybe you will, someday.
70 · Feb 2020
Mother.
Louisa Coller Feb 2020
Out of everyone I've known,
I know the strongest one.
She works through the nights,
But awakening at dawn.
Strict with love,
Yet it shows she cares.

My Mother loves me,
I'm happy she's there.
69 · May 2020
Venomous.
Louisa Coller May 2020
Is hurts to see the past,
Being so ugly bitter in the present.
I panic about the future,
Left in a stagnant worry.

I find it hard to vocalise jealousy,
As I feel guilty it being part of me.
But can you really blame me,
Seeing you be loved before me.

I don't look like any of these women,
I appear differently in every way.
I internally panic and worry,
That you want something I'm not.

Why do you keep ahold of the past,
The memories, notes and valentine's.
By holding onto your used-to-bes,
I feel weak to my knees.

I saw it, but I wish I didn't,
Because now my insecurity thrives.
Like a venomous snake poisoning,
These thoughts come back to haunt again.
68 · Jun 2022
Her Mind
Louisa Coller Jun 2022
Limelight moments captured,
Operahouse settings left in pieces.
Vindictive attitude and grins,
Eliminated pasts left timelessly.
67 · Jul 2021
True Love.
Louisa Coller Jul 2021
The sunflowers are blooming,
For the first time again.
My mind has raised higher,
Into aspiring false fates.
My heart is warmer,
It fills my eyes with tears.

I've made a million mistakes,
You weren't one of those.
You brought me joy,
Overwhelming support.

Soon it'll be true,
I cannot wait.
To see and touch,
Your face again.
67 · Dec 2023
A Brave Heart
Louisa Coller Dec 2023
Your life is the dreams mine tried to calculate,
Envy fills me up but never hate.

Inspired by your ways of speaking,
Infatuation made me fall through.

You try not to let me in,
But I want to see you again and again.

You see my eyes and your gaze weakens me,
With this constant desire to have you near me.

So many have left me breathless,
But gazing at you, I've become speechless.

Words keep failing but my mind keeps falling,
For this interesting love I cannot replace.

It has to be you, my body craves,
The scent of your hair and warmth of your face.

It has to be you, my heart aches,
Your creative wave drowns my sorrows away.

There are so many more people better than us,
But why would I care when I have us?

You're perfect standing there,
My heart becomes brave.
66 · Jun 27
Free
Louisa Coller Jun 27
My brain is so overworked,
I'm short circuiting quite hard.

My heart is breaking pathetically,
Why am I this hurt?

I'm sick of pleasing others,
But everyone wants something for free.

I'm just exhausted when that something
Is me.
64 · Jun 2022
Daydream out the window
Louisa Coller Jun 2022
I gazed out of the window of the car,
Begging myself to see you.
I imagine touching your face,
Praying you'd kiss me too.
A deep sigh is all I can give,
my complex feelings leave me muted.

I wonder if you really know,
How immensely deep I feel for you.
I always hope everyday,
That I might see your face again.

I crave your touch, your smile and laugh,
For it fills me up with a joy unlike any other.

Someday, you will fuel my heart with sudden love.

It's a dream I have,
I hope we share.
63 · Jun 2022
I'm sorry, I...
Louisa Coller Jun 2022
There are many ways,
I want to say sorry.

I'm sorry for being so quick,
To cut you off from my heart.
I grabbed the scissors of fate,
Snipping our wire in the dark.

I'm sorry for being so rash,
Barely holding myself back.
I would leave you confused,
As my glared reminders stayed.

I'm sorry for how I act,
I can't control it, it's unfair.
You understood after all,
Maybe we're not so unalike.

I'm sorry for being so blunt,
Saying it without a warning in sight.
You smiled at a compliment then
To see I meant love at that time.

I'm sorry I'm so cowardly,
I never anticipated this moment.
Everyone reassures me it's natural,
That it's okay. But I still feel guilty.

I'm sorry, I fell in love with you,
I really tried not to,
The last thing you need is me,
Bothering you all eternity.
59 · Apr 7
A Golden Heart
How does it feel?
To have feelings strong as oak.

I cried raindrops of empathy,
You used my water to keep your strength.

How does it feel?
To have vision as clear as fog.

I worked effortlessly to fight your fears,
And you repaid me by holding someone new.

How does it feel?
To shatter my heart completely.

I'm a daffodil of multiple heads,
Yet you ripped my petals off vigorously.

Now, how does it feel?
To build my hopes up everyday.

To destroy my walls mercilessly,
For me to regret being this way.
59 · Jun 2022
Untitled
Louisa Coller Jun 2022
Mighty and strong to the mind,
I seem so cowardly by your side.

Carelessly restlessly walking on,
Help me through this bitter storm.

Are you real? Or am I fake?
Even with fear, I'm just so afraid.

Let me just state to you,
I really think I might love you.

Thoughts are plastered dream-like,
Hell on earth, a heart on fire.

Irreplaceable suffering of own pleasure,
Not now, not here...
Know that I love you.

I can't control their words,
Love hurts and burns my inners.

Overwhelmed by constant thoughts,
Viciously spun deeper in love.

Eventually you might see,
You're so special to me.
Over time I hope you'll feel,
Undeniably the same I do.
55 · Apr 7
Burned Bark
There is charcoal on my arms,
Yet they used to be wood,
You'd think the moisture from my eyes,
Would make the bark feel good.

But I keep playing with the flames,
Running my fingers through the light,
Yet I always end up wondering,
Why burn marks get on my heart.

I've seen a few different flames,
Ones of various strength and colour,
But yours seemed so warm,
Like a campfire in the dark.

But I find myself again, with charcoal hands,
For my branches dry out quick,
And it's just too easy,
for you to come and burn down all of this.

I always think it'll change,
Like I'll be the final flower,
To bloom amongst the flames,
But the smoke just ends up suffocating me again.

My sunflower friends ask me if you didn't realise,
They thought maybe he plays too rough,
But I'm tired of being not enough,
Your obliviousness isn't my flaw.

Suppose that's what hurts in the end,
To know I'm not the flawed one,
But your strings of fake security,
Are what leaves permanent scarring on my face.
55 · Jan 2020
Quietly.
Louisa Coller Jan 2020
Twisted, strangled,
I'm left defeated.

Swirling, gurgling,
This sighs deeper.

The more I speak,
the more I disappoint,
so I'd rather be left here.
Quietly.
54 · Apr 18
Loved by me.
Louisa Coller Apr 18
People say his smile is wider,
His opportunities are growing,
He feels more lighter.

If people knew how beautiful,
This man can be when they don't see,
His eyes are chocolate dreams.

I worked so hard to be that one,
To stay aside and let you know,
It's safe to be loved by me.

Someone you love.
54 · Jun 26
Ripped Apart.
Louisa Coller Jun 26
Why has love become so complex,
We'd rather chip or slash,
A work of art before,
We can even admire them.

When did love become so bitter,
Your love was miniscule but your,
Hatred overflowing like hurricanes,
Mixed with waterfalls.

I open my heart so carefully like a door,
A creak or chip could damage it more,
But you rip it open like a nut,
So violently merciless it makes me numb.

Where has the love of storybooks gone?
A knight was unrealistic, pretentious,
but our fathers were hardworking, learning,
Yet you choose to throw stones in glass homes.

No matter the words I speak to you,
My voice is silenced like I am nothing more,
Than a fun experience or life lesson,
While you can take what you want from me,
Until I'm dead.
54 · May 17
Required
Louisa Coller May 17
My heartbeat is ripping through my chest,
I just remove the day I won't forget,
For a future of a regrets,
Loving myself lesser and less.

I'm a fool of righteousness and pride,
I'm staying up crying at night,
Praying I'll see the northern lights,
But as usual I'm a shadow of right.

I keep fearing I'm going to regret,
Letting you move away from me,
I don't want to be here in this town,
I want to feel the sun on the beach.

I want to feel my pride fill up my soul,
I can't deal with tears anymore,
I want to feel special and in debt,
Of all the future love on yet to get.

Instead I am a fool in a hermit light,
Wondering why I'm so alone that I,
Feel my chest ripping through my soul,
I really never wanna let you go.

If I write this down for you,
Would you care that I even did it too?
For your smile and your warmth and brown eyes too,
I feel like I'm madly in love with you.

I hope one day I get that chance to say,
How deep you make the feeling stay,
But I'm horrified and scared in a way,
you would just take what I have as I lay.

My husband says have faith more in you,
You're not the reason I have that fear too,
I've been constantly used,
For gain, pleasure and dismissal.

Is the season worth the rain at all,
The fire burns my skin as usual,
I'm used to the charcoal I leave behind,
I'm going to burn myself and love you til I die.
54 · Jun 2022
Loved?
Louisa Coller Jun 2022
At first I didn't like you,
In fact I couldn't stand you.
Your stubbornness and aggressive nature,
Wasn't what I wanted from you.

As time goes by, one thing becomes clear to me,
Something strange to many,
But I realized how you weren't liked.

We all joked but then it showed,
That holes of truth began to show.
I stopped myself then.

Soon I slowly started to see,
Just how amazingly lovely,
You are to me each day that passes.

Soon enough, I say it truthfully,
That I think I might love you.
You smile but don't say the same.
50 · Jun 2022
Fire
Louisa Coller Jun 2022
Please, keep me close,
Just kiss me like nobody cares.
Let's stay together, hand in hand,
My sweet little fire.
48 · Jun 24
Sunflower
Louisa Coller Jun 24
Wide eyed, your hope,
It filled lives with fluid dreams.

Your life felt like home,
Reminding us all to be grateful in time.

My time is a chokehold,
How can I live my life knowing yours has died.

Through sunflower fields of hatred,
You were someone to me lost to time.
48 · Jun 27
Wonders.
Louisa Coller Jun 27
I feel mischievous,
Like I should say no.

My heart was torn up,
Yet I yearn for you to hold.

Don't say I love you,
But pull me down under.

Your passion is strength,
Your eyes are wonders.
44 · Jun 24
Hollow
Louisa Coller Jun 24
Play with fire,
Let it charcoal your skin,
Brush off your sparks,
Let's regret the touch of hope.

Play with fire,
Curious yet dangerous,
You'd think burning fingertips,
would be enough.

Playing with fire,
Incineration when I thought,
I was going through creation,
Left my skin dry as bark.

Played with fire,
Left my burnt trunks hollow,
Increased my suffering for tomorrow,
As these burns will never heal.

Foolish nature,
Desired so much to be light,
We forgot that radiation,
Can **** us on sight.

— The End —