i will never be
what everyone wants me to be
what everyone expects of me
all i'll ever be is me

a drop in the sea
in the vast ocean of humanity
not a theory or conspiracy
all i'll ever be is me

can you imagine how free
that feeling can be
to fake it through there's no need
when all i'll ever be is me

Just when I think I've seen it
All throughout this  land
They went and upped the anti
On the classic can of Spam

Those with the higher power
The ones that run the show
The Spam men of the hour
In a bunker buried way down low

Have added different flavors
To this meat of mystery
From Teriyaki to Tocino
That's bacon to those who don't speak Philippine

They heat it up with Jalapeno
Helps to liven up the slime
Those bunker boys as they're fondly known
Have really out done themselves this time

Aloha from Hawaii?
Imagine Spam in a Hula skirt
As they pull out the Leis and go all the way
Adding pineapple to those Spam burps

Exciting rumors have it
They're in talks with Oreo
There's no place in this universe
That a good slice of spam won't go

The only thing they need to work on
Is the dipping in the milk
They have yet to solve the problem
Of the massive oil spill

Yes they've taken what the rest of us
Never thought could be improved
Just goes to show what ingenuity
And a touch of crazy genius can do