Like a butterfly going back to its cocoon
shedding its intricate wings
and wrapping itself in darkness
waiting for the change to be complete
back to the familiar nothingness
that has become so familiar
it feels like home

For the times you understood, but said nothing at all
For the days you saw my sadness, and pretended otherwise
For the hugs you didn’t give
For the calls you didn’t answer
For the funeral, stay home.

Stayed in bed just a little too long
Driving there just a little too fast
Not thinking of what the day holds
Daydreaming about the past

Lost in thoughts
In stories that never happened
In words that were never said
In love that was never felt

Lost in the deep dark places of the mind
Trying to move on
Getting lost again and again
Out of one maze and into another
Seeing the light but never quite making it there

You slowly cracked my cynical shell
And melted my frozen heart

You were the secret that I wanted to tell,
But I didn’t know where to start

You were the rainboots to my puddle,
You were the sun on a gray day

My feelings you did befuddle,
But I couldn’t stay away

You became my addiction,
I got in over my head

Too bad our love was fiction,
Because these words remained unsaid

Windows down, music up, thoughts flowing through the breeze
I've always loved you, but you'll never love me

You love my best friend, and she loves someone else,
Funny the things we do to ourselves

Nothing is wrong
But everything is wrong
There’s no reason for this sadness,
But it’s inescapable
It’s pulling me down, drowning me
Over and over again
Lost in this sea of thoughts
Unable to find the way home
Tired of being here,
But unable to move
So lonely, but so unable to talk
So exhausted,
But always awake
The waves of guilt and shame never sleep