Maybe I'm silly to be in love with
A grey beanie perched on
Golden hair
A warm smile and blue eyes
"What's wrong with that?" I ask myself.
Nothing is wrong with cold lips touching warm coffee cups;
I could stay with you on a rainy day.
I am in love with the softness of anything that belongs to you-
Anything you've touched-
Worn t-shirts and mugs with the mark of your lips around them.
I touch your shoulder
You flash your white teeth
Unscathed by espresso-filled evenings.
You are an apparition;
A gift from god.

I leave a $30 tip.

I'm alone,
You know,
And would welcome you
At any time
To paint pictures with my blood
And **** me slowly
Staring into my
Dilated pupils
And wring my neck
With my
Sweaty palms

I certainly wouldn't stop you

Cigarettes and coffee
At midnight every night
People wonder why I don't sleep
But I don't question it
Nor do I care at all.

Sleep never did me any good
I was always exhausted anyway.
Nightmares took my mind
And passed it between their grimy fingers.
I do not wish to be subjected to that again.

Now, as a self-induced insomniac
These nightmares merely come true
Or they show up
In the form of hallucinations.

I guess when I found slumber
I had a better grip on my emotions.
But so what?
I am still out of control either way.

Sleep or no sleep
I am a sad and lonely
Shell of a human being
And I pray every night
That I will be okay again someday.

Hey
(It was sunny;
You and I dodged the rays all day)
How are you?
(You smiled at me;
I felt like I had a place with you)
It's rainy, today.
(You said it was poetic;
We spent the day with hot espresso and black umbrellas)
It's weird, not seeing you.
(Every day you hugged me;
I didn't like hugs, before I knew you)
I miss you.
(You are gone now;
We promised to stay together always)
I love you.
(You told me first;
It came like lightning in the summer and took my breath away)
I can't live without you.*
(I don't often tell the truth;
If I am honest once, let it be this)

It was like we were two old friends
Sharing insights on a shiny green lawn.
We would come here again, I knew
In our own red garments and tasseled hats.
All I know is that
As you smiled so genuinely I found
There was no one I would rather see the end of adolescence with.
We are kindred spirits, you and I.