Three simple words and I still get tounge tied

Great job me

The day we first met, we were side characters of the other's stories
Never speaking, white noise to mosaic faces
The day we first talked, the picture became clear,
Vibrant and prismatic

I hate this
This feeling of indifference
This feeling of not caring
What am I missing?
Is this what I'm all amounting to?
That at the first sign of hope I cling to it and yet at the same not?
I don't wanna half-*** anymore
I want to change
I need to change

Curious
How you set yourself up to fail
When you have not even started anything

Nay, she was not the poem
She was the inspiration

White noise and mosaic faces
Clear that my mind wanders
With longing and remorse
To the place what was once is
Where you and I belong

Forever with her is just a second
And yet it still falls short