How is it that you can claim
That you still love me?
While all you do is blame…?
I used to sit upon your knee
As I cried; wrapped tightly in your arms.
I still remember when you told me
That a man is only as strong as his word
And a promise is but a decree
And I believed you… until I heard
that you could not be there.
Your reasoning was shallow
Not a call on that day
And for that you’re not callow
Later you called but hung before I could say
That I would have answered you
Because you are my dad
And I’ll always love you
And remember the memories we once had
But those are darkened too
With the lies you told me
You said there there’s only
Two women you’d always love
Me and your mom, so why am I so lonely?
Oh yes because all you did was shove
Me to the back burner when you found out
You called me egotistic
You called me immature
But I’m not that simplistic
At least not any more
It is you who never hears
It is you who stopped calling
And have lost touch after the years
That you have been recalling
Who I was as a child
I tried to tell you,
That you are misguided
But you couldn’t face that it’s true
That your source of media is one sided
It’s brain washing you.
Yes, and you’re correct
It takes maturity to hold dear
Someone when you think their thought’s wrecked
So then why have you not been here?
When I needed you most?
Look inside and tell me what you see
Do you see my broken heart, shattered dreams,
Broken wings, blood stained soul and maybe
Even chains clinking away? But it seems
You don’t. How strange it is that you’re so blind
To what is clear though deep inside.
But it’s ok, cause I don’t mind
I’m used to all this pain inside.
(c) Lee Bauer. 2007-2010
Staring out a ***** window trying to see into your heart
but unlike others you're not so clear,
and it's tearing me apart
knowing that I can't be near
I want to be with you
but you only push away
I really need to know if you love me too
so I can live happy some other day
I don't want to be a burden
I don't want to give you pain
but every time I see you I can no longer get a word in
and I'm sick of all this blame
and I want to see you smile
for when I'm with you I feel more than fine
so no more crying against this cold tile
and maybe in time
you will see me in a new light
and I'll end this little rhyme
wanting to make everything right
for I wont give up, I'm out for a fight
I'm not a little weakling
but though I try as I might
I can only show but an inkling
of how much I truly love you
you're my inspiration my ray of sun shine
and I'll admit that I lied for it's true
it's more than just a crush, can you be mine?
(c) Lee Bauer. 2008-2010
Falling, Falling, ever falling,
the wind around me's howling.
Please take this key
and place it by my knee
So that I can be released from this cage.
For all that exists is hate and rage
in my falling cage.
(c) Lee Bauer. 2007-2010
You call me an angel sent down to thee
I've secretly hated everyone... even me
My heart is cold my wings tainted
My life is filled with lies, painted
With a halo stained with hate
and wings of lust, perhaps it's fate?
Yet here you stand with loving eyes
Not fully seeing behind all lies
My heart is cold, my wings tainted
My lies are what made my world painted
I have no room for you
You know it's true
yet you stand there in a daze
as I stand before you with eyes a blaze
My wings are black with tips dyed red
This darkness you have long since dread
Yet even still you touched my soul
And now I see I am not yet whole
A piece is missing, long since gone
I fall to my knees and weep till dawn
These tears have not been shed for some time
Not since my etching pain was at it's prime
My heart was cold, wings tainted
Less lies are making my world painted
You wipe away my tear and smile down
I look up at you and don't make a sound
You melted my heart and saved my soul
And now I feel that I'm more whole
These wounds will never heal
I shall forever keep my life real
All because of some one who believed
now I can live my life relieved
(c) Lee Bauer. 2008-2010.
Hush ***, I love you
and long for your embrace.
Your gentle touch, your lovely coo
the intensity as you trace
my spine with your fingers
and smile as I shiver at your touch.
I am yours alone as your kiss lingers
on my lips, which makes me yearn for you so much.
Yet the world is between us,
so much time setting us apart.
but this love-- this lust
I have for you is embedded in my heart.
Hush babe, I love you.
Saya cintai mu.
I'm not your little wall flower
Someone to look at who will never respond.
I will never be society's doll
Or play the part you gave me.
I will never sit in acquiescence
Or mumble thanks to your criticism.
I refuse to respect those who don't respect me
I refuse to wait in silence
Yet I wait
For the time when I can strike
Make you listen!
I will not be binary
Life never was meant to be black or white
Or to even make sense.
I will help my brothers and sisters
To tear the thread of hate from their lips.
The thread YOU had sewn on
And with ****** lips, we'll speak the truth.
The truth you wished to silence.
We shall heal from your oppression
And tear down these walls
That you placed up to hide from reality.
We will scrape down those walls
And with ****** hands, reach for you
Grab you and embrace you.
Let you escape from your fear, your hate
Your internalized pain
You can no longer ignore our cries
2010. This poem was written by Lee "Mouse" Bauer. Please refrain from stealing my work.
— The End —