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Jan 2014 · 1.0k
Rinse and Repeat
Laurie Fisher Jan 2014
Just gonna run for hours once the sun comes up
Sleep and rinse repeat until I reach defeat
Maybe I'll be alright, maybe I won't
Maybe I'll take those silly meds to keep them chemicals in check
Maybe I won't!
I don't give a
Hmm maybe I do Maybe I don't
Money, money makes the world go round round round
And I just don't got enough
They got me got me got me
Right where they want me
I don't give a
Hmm maybe I do maybe I don't
I'll be alright
Alright as a poor ***** can be In this ****** economy
With people you can't trust
Who leave you in the dust!
98% to be exact
Statistically speaking
They are waiting on your back breaking
So they can be there and care for you in your despair.
I don't give a
Hmm maybe I do.maybe I don't.
Nobody has triggered my sense of utter disgrace in this human race
Well now that's a lie
Because its all of you
I don't give a.
Jan 2014 · 625
Genuine or of the kin?
Laurie Fisher Jan 2014
Pseudo or jaded...
Everyone I come in contact with is degraded
No fresh starts, baggage in each hand
How can I start where someone has brand
Cutting into their flesh, a maimed label upon their skin
Revealing to all others, the uninviting of their kin
A marvelous creation, ruined by tainted fools
Who don't appreciate how to communicate
They just suffocate and constrict the worthy
Of their deserving, and now we're left silently observing
Nov 2013 · 547
One of Them Days
Laurie Fisher Nov 2013
Woke up
Ate breakfast alone, again
Longing and wishing
Dragging though my day
Everything is just okay
Right in the middle of the equator kinda day

Challanges; non-existant
Travels, much too distant
Body, tired and slow from no excitement

Don't want to complain
Just spitting it out
Trying to explain
But hey, everything is just okay
Yeah its one of them days
Nov 2013 · 874
So It Goes
Laurie Fisher Nov 2013
Floating in my head as I drift into slumber.
Awakening to reach and feel. Feel that warmth.
Not coldness and tightness in my chest.
Breath the life back into me. Breath it. Breath it please.

Fear gets us all.
Grabs us tightly and is forceful and ridgid to relase.
But we can be free if we just relieve.
Relieve and retrieve our own life into ourselfs.
Just breath it breath it please.

Lonilness attacks hard
and we can't believe that anything can be strong and steady. Instead we take a step back and plead.
We're hurt and yet we hurt another in our attempt to heal.
But its not healing instead were stealing.
Draining others. Satisfying thirst. Inquenchable.
Take another sip its a sweet hurt.

So just sip it sip it until the last drop is disipating against your tounge.
Sour as vinegar in your mouth.
But your soul is tame and satisfied.
Then the wind whisps and air is knocked back into your tight chest.
And the clean oxygen is as beautiful as the warming sensations pulsing though your blood stream
But your energy is drained.
A pained soul drinks up.
Your heated blush face turns pallor and your extremities run cold as ice.
The vice drinks you up.
Keep on sippin until you disipate.
Oct 2013 · 1.9k
Universal Smog
Laurie Fisher Oct 2013
I thought this was natural
Born within us
As children our minds are read
Instructions printed on a page, we figured;
Someone was there, with the medicine
Curing each desire, and whim
Leaving that realm
We realize,
To love one another, such a difficult task
To treat each other with respect
Easier to hide behind a plastic mask
To work hard in difficult times
Simpler to deceive and take another bite
Looking too hard
& Waiting too long
Grows tiresome
We ignore the red flags popping up left and right
We want it to be so right and so true
Blinding ourselves and blaming each other
We're never going to get what we want under such weather.
There's emptiness in our minds and vacancy in our hearts
The voids are parasites grasping for more and more nutrients
Neither are fulfilled and death is approaching
The heart is beating slow, the lungs are quivering in smoke and the mind is in a fog
Never to reach solace, lost in a universal smog.
Sep 2013 · 1.4k
Unbreakable Glass
Laurie Fisher Sep 2013
Y our a pathological liar
A pretending villen in disguse
Your muse is attention
Your a puppet master with your snake eyes

Weak when you stand alone so you grasp at another
There you are, standing on thier shoulders

Can't you be man and learn from your mistakes
No, you only look to find whats there for you to take

Its not that you left me
Loved me, but was pretending
Its that you can't even admit
The worthlessness that you yourself has commited

Honesty you say
You stood by and were a man
But you lied your *** off until the very end

The whole entire time
It was a plan of torture
Every smile and every nod
Every insult and every blunder

You chose to decieve
And continue going on
Even if our togetherness was truely wrong

If it was over for you
Why didn't you leave me
I'm not a piece of glass
Your not going to break me

Your a coward
Plain and simple
The truth hurts maybe
But your a fool and you lost in this game baby
Sep 2013 · 1.6k
Dear, Enablers
Laurie Fisher Sep 2013
With blinders on they let the wrong go on
No interventions
No attempts to make it right
Look the other way
Not putting up a fight

They must kinda like it
You know
If trust were an *****
Then I’d say they’re looking for a donation
Another one to ***** up
Like cirrhosis of the liver
They’re lookin’ to corrupt another

Kinda a sick when you think about it
Acting as if nothing occurred
Forget that pain we condoned
It’s as if I’m a scapegoat, placed on throne
Smiles and chitchat are replaced suddenly
Each with a heavy rock and jagged stones

I emerge from the mess; still angry
I don’t fight, No I don’t get revenge
But I’m still angry
What do I do when I’m still angry
I want to cause pain
I want to get them close and turn my back
I want to be the one with the power and the patience
The push them to the brink and fill them with self doubt
But no, I don’t fight
I don’t get revenge
I just get angry.
Dec 2012 · 436
A Few New Things
Laurie Fisher Dec 2012
Stitched up and tied with a bow.
On my doorstep, it rang.
Sound bountiful in my ears.
Knocking now it wants to get this started.
Tapping in my head continues on.
Pounding in my head it continues on.
Pulsing in my head it, continues on.
On...on...on.
Oct 2012 · 1.5k
A Rock and a Hard Place
Laurie Fisher Oct 2012
Natures wind blows hard
And nurture is not so sweet
Tornadoes brew
And volcanoes erupt
Yet nurture is still cold as the ice nature creates
A being lies still; corrupt.
Thunder clashes and the lightening follows
Wheres the middle ground?
Wheres my middle ground?
Oct 2012 · 915
Sweat It Out
Laurie Fisher Oct 2012
Sometimes it works.
When I grasp the pen tightly
Spreading words across a page
Letting go.

Other times I need to sweat
Sweat out the pain
And sweat out the fear
I need to sweat until I don't feel.

Letting go as my soles slap the pavement
Blurs of the grey sky and the green forestry surround me

Forgotten; the life that engulfs me.
Forgotten; the waves that slam me.
Forgotten; all the thought processes and memory.

Letting go as I slow and regain composure
Drenched in the sour pain that lived in me.
Oct 2012 · 725
The House
Laurie Fisher Oct 2012
Imprisoned inside a house
With photos and mirrors
A kitchen table with apples in a bowl
TV's and electronics to fill silence with sound
Windows to view a different world
With bushes in the yard and mailbox in the front
But beyond that scenery lives a world changing immensely
I lay alone imprisoned in a timeless world
Seems could lay for hours and no one would even know
Somewhere beyond this I imagine I wouldn't feel so alone
In a place that lacks noise that fills every moment with tortuous sound
Not every foot step with a place to go
Not every mistake rubbed with rough alcohol into the wound
A place where I might enjoy the breath I breathe and the time I have left
Sep 2012 · 737
You're Too Helpful
Laurie Fisher Sep 2012
You're too helpful
Push and shoving words of "wisdom" into my ear drum
Prognosis this and treatment that
Mind over matter
Happiness and gratitude
Stop with all your positive attitude
Belief and thought process this
and try this technique that
You're too helpful, don't you see?
Stop pulling out the terms and use your brain
You're killing me with kindness and it's driving me insane
Trying to bring peace, but all that you succeed is expressing your beliefs
You're not really listening, but offering up advice
Please just stop, you're too helpful.
Sep 2012 · 538
Within Me
Laurie Fisher Sep 2012
I’ve lost hope each day and now my pocket is empty
Nothing but filth and ash
Breaking her bones breaking my bones
Tearing into grey matter ripping it open destroying it
God is a lie don’t you know
Perhaps that is all I know
Spawn of Satan, he resides in me now
Living my life for me
7:27 now and there’s not a ******* thing to show
Pitiful end of the day
I hang my head low and reside where all the hate must go
Try to shower it off me
Try to scrub the rage away
Try to flush the ugly down the drain
But it up-heaves and splashes into my face
Like acid on my skin
It dissipates into my pores and fades in
Aug 2012 · 594
Thanks
Laurie Fisher Aug 2012
A solution is an answer is a new start is plan for action
My mind is a tangled mess is a upheaval of confusion is a plane of destruction

Your words are kind are intentions of rescue are helpful injections
My words are cold are harsh are screams of imperfect reflection

I am stained am bleached am covered in a negativity wave
I am fallen am failing am flailing

This day is everlasting is demanding is a revelation of my creation
My acts are grim are stern are unrelenting

Your forgiveness is comforting is awing is, undeserving.
Aug 2012 · 642
Swept Away
Laurie Fisher Aug 2012
Once upon a time I felt the sweet bristles lift me off the pavement
Up to a place I’d never been, a place I shall never lay my iris’s on again
I squeezed and arched to fit my anatomy with persistent consistency
What a tragedy, it seemed to be imaginary and with another cool breeze
Off I fell onto the uninviting pavement, or so I thought

With a few steps, to my left a rose garden appeared
Too cold for a petal to bloom, I wouldn’t allow it
With my ice breath, I commenced every living thing to its death
I breathed an oath; I refused any sort of growth
I see my foolish ways and I stare at the darkened dirt
Nothing surrounding it, but pavement and stone
Here I lay and here I own, what a pitiful, and lonesome soul
Awaiting the zephyr, as there has to be another.
Aug 2012 · 694
Retention Pond
Laurie Fisher Aug 2012
It's fleeting
Quick and tempting
A moment gone so fast
Can barely remember the happiness that surpassed
An experience dissipated in a moment of time
Relish in future, unlikely
Won't last very long
Feels so right
Gratification plain in sight
But forgotten by morrow
Holding on hard to these moments so pleasing
Sad to say the truth that rings
Nothing lasts forever
Even memories, so displeasing.
Aug 2012 · 942
Fuck this Flesh
Laurie Fisher Aug 2012
**** Her and **** Him.

        **** life and **** the world.

        **** living and **** this air I inhale.

        **** it all and **** the small.

        **** everything and **** the swine.

        **** the good and **** the bad.

        **** the right and **** the wrong.

        **** the sun and **** the moon.

        **** the past and **** the unknown.

        Just lose it. Lose control and lose center. Lose it all and drop. This is the ******* fall.

        **** hope and **** desire.

        **** the drink and **** the job.


        **** it, you'll mess up.

        **** it, you won't survive.

        **** it, they've won.


        **** this mind and **** my slumber. **** the awakening and **** this hating.

        **** my thoughts and **** my words, **** my eyes and **** my lips, **** the pain that is on a continuous drip.

        **** my legs I walk no more. **** my arms I reach no longer. **** my core I'm rotting from the inside out.


        **** the movement and **** the sounds.

        **** my racing pulse and **** my trembling foot.

        **** my tightened jaw and **** my twisted brows.

        **** my nails gripping hard and **** my ears still hearing sound!


        **** every inch, **** this flesh.
Jul 2012 · 729
Achromatism
Laurie Fisher Jul 2012
A single round raindrop
Falls from sky to ground
Fast flowing though the atmosphere
It makes a pitter patter sound

From Red to Violet
Indigo and Yellow
It springs up in the wet, wet meadow
With leafy trunks and a light that shines amongst
Together the rain and the light
Mix and conjure up delight

Orange, blue and green
Its value is of sheen
But quick as soon as you saw it
It takes on the property of unseen
And that gold you were in search of
Is now a fleeing dream
Just a simple, color scheme
Laurie Fisher Jul 2012
I just want some short lived injection of romance.
Just a kiss.
A spark.
A momment that makes want to keep trudging along.
A fleshy touch.
An imperical state, where something blooms.
Where you realize that its worth it.
Someone who can reach inside you.
Flipping your stomoch 'round.
Your sick.
Drowning in suffocating, emotional mudd.
Jun 2012 · 587
The Phases of the Moon
Laurie Fisher Jun 2012
Everyday I see the sun come up
But you can still see the moon
Its cloudy and distant
But oh it exists.

The sun warms me and my flesh
It relieves the chill that night represents

Weather the moon is full or new
Some times its half, even crescent
Then it quickly rises, quarter moon,
Back to half, and finally its new
And when its new, its bright
and the brighter the more
It pains my eyelids
Oh my eyelids

The sun comes and goes each day
But the moon is forever

Shining the earth with light
You can feel it fading though
You can feel it fading
Sometimes early, the clouds will get in the way
They are the cousins of the moon
And just like it they are sure to ruin the mood

Rain pours hard
and thunder claps loud
You can see the moon large and towering
While the clouds surround it and it rains down
Oh it rains down
Sometimes it doesn't stop.
Smothering the earth in polluted waters

Diving too deep in these waters
What a tragic event
Without the sun
It would drown us.
Jun 2012 · 475
Improv
Laurie Fisher Jun 2012
Discern fantasy from fact
Its difficult enough
To stay intact

Your dreams and desires
Are as equal to mine
But the difference between us
Is the truth that is underline

How I wish it to be true
But the information I am repeating
Is soon to misconstrue

Miles apart
Distance kills my heart
I reach for you
But your too far
And what it leaves is
A scar
Jun 2012 · 740
A Sketch in Ash
Laurie Fisher Jun 2012
A voice whispers words into my veins
A voice instructs me, strut this way
And that way too, don’t stop...I’ll never shoo.
By the time I’ve made it to the train
My heart begins to
                                                            T­****
                                                            ­          
                                                      ­                   Thump

                                                          ­                           Thump

                                                          ­                                                      Without a moment to choke
                                                           ­                                                          I hop on the station
                                                         ­                                                  Headed west, with barely a breath
                                                          ­                                A thought in this head that steals any concentration

Sleep eludes me, you penetrate me
Enrich me with the echoes of your mind
Bare with me, let us intertwine
                                                            A path paved over by the ways of the world
                                                            Still hot and sticky, I mold it with my toes
                                                             Imprinted with my wishes and my hopes
No traces of intervention
No substance of prevention



Sitting atop the stool
Painted by the artist
Within his palm
Lies his instrument
Prepared to implement
Painting shadows of time and space
Strokes back and forth
Lines united by grace
                                                       ­                                         A picture varnished
                                                   ­                                           A piece of time caught
                                                      ­                                         As quick as created, it
                                                              ­

                                                               ­                                                   dis..
        ­                                                                 ­                                               si..
             ­                                                                 ­                                                 pa.
                                                             ­                                                                 ­           .tes


                                                      ­Fading with all its glory
May 2012 · 734
A Place
Laurie Fisher May 2012
I, want to be in a different place
A place a new and of disguise
One where there aren't any grey
Skies

I, doubt that anything will change
Paces are slowly moving toward
A target and I, want to be in that new place
That place, where the putrid smell
Doesn't exist
That anxious stench won't be
Amongst us.
I, wonder does this new place
Even exist
Is there a reason to persist?
**A place a new and of disguise
One where there isn't any grey
Skies.
May 2012 · 973
Idealist
Laurie Fisher May 2012
Idealism is comical
But hardly comprehensible
You want to resist
With much persistence
Who you really are
Inside you not a super hero
One that can fix all
You trick your mind
Believing that you can make a difference
That in this life
Others are more important
But one mistake you have made
When times are dark
All that ******* will fade
Selfish creatures we are
Stuck in a state of deep desires
You’re a puppet chosen to play the role
And you can gladly pretend
And stand high on your stead
Pretending your above the laws of nature
But you’re a peasant
Nothing major
May 2012 · 482
A Flame with no End
Laurie Fisher May 2012
Truth be told he is merely a mirage.
A gift never to be given.
A harsh truth of the world
And yes I have considered what your about to ask
My overwhelming feelings toward him
But let's get back to the task at hand
Life doesn't want it to work.
Well that I can take.
I'm really quite uncertain
If there's something between us
That will cause me to to break
But I digress
He's a beauty that won't hurt me.
Because he won't let me close enough.
May 2012 · 554
Breakin the Laws
Laurie Fisher May 2012
You love my sunny disposition. If it lasts, sometimes it runs away for a rainy day. I call for it, spread those clouds away, but deeper into the sky it dives, away from my mind. The illuminating rays become dark and dismal. Forgive the dark casted upon the shadow of your world. I can only shine until my eyes crack and liquid pours, out of my sockets, out of my veins, pumping hard it labors away. A lonesome flower pops from the dampened dark dirt, a snap of orange, a pop of yellow, a blue like no tomorrow, they break the harsh laws of my sorrow. And like yesteryear my sunny disposition begins to appear. A glorious show, you never quite know, when it will surprise, those cracked eyes are gloss and you see a chick who you thought you’ve lost. Here I stand, and I do command, happiness that will surpass the darkest hours. When the sour comes out and I cry out just know that without you here, the clouds might never disappear. I’ve been drained and though sweat and tears I’ve overcome the pain, within my soul lies a stain and it will remain a scar that will continue to show me how I’ve grown and no one will own the show that I condone. So let it sit still, let it lie, let it be with you and remember why I’ve told you that you are everything to me and no matter how dark I may get, don’t you dare forget my sometimes sunny position and the regret that lies is with me forever and there will always be highs. Highs like you cannot conceive. I will repay the slow and painful delay of what I have brought to the table. I’m back and the fact is that I keep trying and trying to fix what I’ve done and the truth is all I can do is continue my sunny disposition for you.
May 2012 · 822
Fictitious Faith
Laurie Fisher May 2012
They say the Gardener comes
He waters the flowers,
and cares for them each day
and that of which follows
is amazing in the eyes of the insane

They say the Gardener comes
and you cannot see
because he is the epitome, of invisibility
you cannot see the figure of mystery
yet you accept without a moment of inquiry

They say the Gardener comes
each and every day
and that he is veracious
in everything that he may say
yet you cannot hear
the sounds they say he portrays

They say the Gardener is immortal
and that he is real
but, tell me the difference between imaginary
and the opposite of actuality

An enigma is all that I see
a problem to a baffling degree
its time to change how our minds perceive
let logic shine though
and wave good-bye to those who believe
in that of which deceives
Apr 2012 · 494
College
Laurie Fisher Apr 2012
My eyes burn
                            crying
                                      reading
                                                  straining

My brain hurts
                             cramming
                                             focusing
                                                           trying

My wrists aches
                            scribbling
                                           pushing
                                                       typing

At the brink, of a snap
Trying not, to step back
Cannot relax, not just yet
One more push, then I can forget.

Let it end swiftly
Let it end now
Let it end so we can finish this show.

All at once
The work begins to pounce
Got to get it done
So I can renounce.
Apr 2012 · 577
Inevitable Dashing of Hopes
Laurie Fisher Apr 2012
You once whispered words of love,
The words you once, were proud of.
The words of a loving frontier
Were you words you once serenaded my ear.

Now I wonder what you thought
Was I taken a fool?
Did I buy into a long shot?

While our times I cherish,
Were times of covert…
They are the times I shall
Always revert.

Am I meaningless in the spectrum of things,
Am I a pleasant treasure never to be seen?
You say I am of the most divine

Shall I give up, finally resign
Because the pain of not knowing is the most painful of all
And I can’t live my life at your beckon call.
Apr 2012 · 555
A Lone
Laurie Fisher Apr 2012
Loneliness, it blurs the lines of true attraction.
For a moment in time, you’re in the cross hairs of satisfaction.
Loneliness, it’s not too scarce,
It lies within us all, a vital force, tumbles out with a push.

To be lonely, is to be the one and only.
The conspiracy of happiness is what drags us.
But I digress, from the path that I am connecting,
Because, the eyes of the lonely, is not few and far between
It’s translucent, and likely to be seen.
Apr 2012 · 675
Victim of Sublime
Laurie Fisher Apr 2012
Pounding and pounding within my chest
To hear your voice on the other line puts my heart in arrest
The minutes will never last, I revel in that of which I can
If only I were in your presence, where you could fondly take my hand
We could lie near the ocean waves, where there delightful sound would carry us away
In a new realm, we will not worry of life’s alterations that leave the lines of determination, blurry.

Rhythmic prominent, beats
Are the clues to the unsettling defeat
The ocean salt is now bitter
Revel in the moments that we have left to consider.

Sweat arises, though the existence of the zephyr
My mind is whirling, until you lean in closer
Your chest pounding against mine, forehead settled, lips caress the most divine
A pleasant moment held in time, but as usual it is victim of sublime.

Rhythmic prominent, beats
Are the clues to the unsettling defeat
The ocean salt is now bitter
Revel in the moments that we have left to consider.
Mar 2012 · 1.6k
Rotten
Laurie Fisher Mar 2012
Rotten fruit is still fruit, no matter how bitter or sour the taste
I don't keep rotten fruit in my house, there is no what if, or case.

Decomposition is the fate, once a fruitful piece of life, is now death,
served, rotting in its place.

I won't be the piece of fruit rotting from the inside out,
because of the fruit that surrounds me.

You smell is getting stronger, your taste; undesirable.
I cannot digest, your unrepairable.

One last time I will reiterate,
I don't keep rotten fruit in my house, there is no what if, or case.
Mar 2012 · 1.0k
Addict
Laurie Fisher Mar 2012
Some days are **** it.
Some days are fight it.
Some days are clear,
and some days you ignite it.

It's not always a choice.
What you chose, you won't complain.
None of these decisions,
Seem to be very sane.

One over the other
You pick and choose blindly
But either or, will fill your void kindly.

Your trust resolution
Is also your suspect.
With your magnifying glass
Your blurred eyes look though the crack
Bedazzled by what you see, what is the cause of my misery?

Poison or solution?
Pain or resignation?
Your mind is wrapped up in
Caution and frustration.

For a dear friend struggling.<3
Feb 2012 · 1.8k
Mental Attitude
Laurie Fisher Feb 2012
Your feeble mind
It twists your words up, intertwined
You lie like its the truth
Your an artist when it comes to being sleuth
You complain for a lack of communication
But you listen like the deaf
And  lead like the blind
You can't understand
You got ****** up in the mind
You've got nothing else
To defend is all you have
Your absolutely empty
And its so disgustingly sad
Tricks and wicked games
Are the battles you choose to play
Its as if you woke up
Said, **** the world, I win today
But today is not your day to win
You can **** the world
But I've caught new wind
Listen up, I'll say it once
You can ***** the others
But I've found new stance
Feb 2012 · 640
Darling
Laurie Fisher Feb 2012
Darling, am I imagining
Or is this real?
Reality seems to be so tricky
With all its spins, it becomes surreal.
I’m not sure, if it’s the drunken words
That forces your heart to splurge
When sober morning arises
Does guilt and doubt reverberate?
Were there things you have to reclaim and reiterate?
Feb 2012 · 773
My Valentines Day
Laurie Fisher Feb 2012
My Valentine’s Day
Lonesome; at will
Suitors come about
Offering flowers whilst they kneel

They want me at their side
For them to confide
They are lonely, self-esteem lacking and deprived

On their knees
They ask of me
Revive the life back into me

But who am I?
To please these wishes
For deprivation of love
Is the reason for my existence?
Is it I? That you see?
Or the parts, you wish to take from me?

My lips to kiss.
My hips to hold.
My warm skin to touch.
Your toy to mold.


But, my love lies
In another place
An idealistic, realistic face

He knows the trail
To lead me on
With essence of ecstasy
Of which he showers upon.
Feb 2012 · 574
Insane Remorse
Laurie Fisher Feb 2012
You say your tears are of sorrow
I call that *******
Inside your only hallow.

I called you out,
On your foolish attempts to manipulate
I called you out,
On your ways to keep me malcontent.

You say that frown is the pain you feel
I call that *******
You have no wounds to cut so they can heal.

I called you out,
On the sadness you say you feel
I called you out,
Stop pretending any of this is real!

You make me laugh
When you act as if you’re hurt
Pity party and your guests have arrived
Trivial at best
But I must persist
Let’s all listen
As you whine and moan
No, don’t worry none of this has grown old

Now I’m insane and the laughter is gone
I’m burning hot with the rage I usually keep down
Pity party and the guests have grown weary
As you whine and moan
Yes, begin to worry because this has grown old in a hurry

The remorse settles in
And I fear the hole I dug so far
I let it take over
And the fault is my own
Tore you down to what you call tears
But trust me the guilt has stopped
It’s only the fear
Feb 2012 · 741
Faux Smile
Laurie Fisher Feb 2012
A big ball of procrastination
A circle of frustration
All the pains add up
But fail when it comes to elimination.

Time and time again
I reflect on my fears
The irrationality
Builds and re-appears.

I toss and turn at night
Cringing when I wake
I try and curl back up
Its not enough of a break.

So when I rise yet again
I'll try and put a fake smile in
My eyes will frown and tears may swell
But as long as I'm smiling
No one can tell.
Jan 2012 · 617
Blind Poetry
Laurie Fisher Jan 2012
Slamming doors
Shouts of fury
I wish I could get away
Because this is sure to escalade in a hurry
squeeling tires and whispers of desperation
Will this end in a myocardial infarction
Mellow now
Silences deafens
Tear drops roll
And I silence my gasps
I bury my head
And try to relax
Laurie Fisher Jan 2012
You’re gonna break this heart,
Someday--It’s true
And maybe it’ll work
In the reverse way too

Taking a shot in the dark
Even if it leaves a hole in my heart
Impart to me
Don’t leave me with a question mark

With all the evidence
So clear and subdue
It’s hard to fathom
This love I have for you

But try and understand
Those sober thoughts
Are tough withstand
Your sweet, sloppy words
Brings my heart back from remand.
Jan 2012 · 801
Untrodden Desire
Laurie Fisher Jan 2012
There’s something ample between us
Hotter than a white tipped flame
I feel we’re riding on the cusp
Of love
Where our hearts collide and burst
More than a thirst; that can be quenched.


Alas
I do not know
To the extent of which we’ll grow
Unforeseen probabilities
Get the best of me.


Mystified by your psyche
Stitched so carefully
Pieces of you
Trace me
Goose bumps arise
If only comprehensible
I become stupefied
When I look into your eyes.


Thunderstruck!
In the times of delight
Can’t it?
Won’t it?
Just might…
I hold on
With a mental grip
Too paradoxical to make sense
To the notion of our

                                              Love.
Dec 2011 · 499
It Will End
Laurie Fisher Dec 2011
If the good always has a death
Why crave it
Why sustain what will always fail to exist
The unspeakable The wicked The unsatisfactory
Isn't the mediocre enough
The dear has to be ripped away as well?
Dec 2011 · 1.0k
Ruthless Termination
Laurie Fisher Dec 2011
Dismissed.
Like a bug on the wall...
Blown off.
No matter of your heart, at all.

Done with.
Over and final
You got what you wanted, and that's all

Neglected.
And the fault is my own
Took your words for truth
When I really needed to stand by my sleuth.

I want to persist
For my feelings were true
But, you sliced right thou me
Hewed me in half.

I'm left to pay
For the severance given,
Unsure of the source of which it was driven

Twice the pain!
Number 2 in the line.
Thought this was different
But it was just another time.
Dec 2011 · 764
Spazz
Laurie Fisher Dec 2011
Sometimes it builds
To a degree intolerable
Some of it, it can be untraceable
The source unknown
Of the aching within
Impenetrable thoughts
Seeking a foundation

Strain comes out
In various ways
From your head to your toes
It will divulge

Aching in the head
Eyes flooded with blood
Tension of the mind
The body too
Tapping of the fingers
Shaking of the leg
It all soon, gives it away
Nov 2011 · 981
Trashy Confessions
Laurie Fisher Nov 2011
I miss you every ******* day

I try and force these **** thoughts away

But you shine right though in the most devious way

Like a web between two dead trees

It traps me and then and there I drop to my knees

I squirm to rip you; get the ******* me

But just like before; you release.



Then again, like a fierce breeze

You take away my concentration with vile ease

Over me; you flow along-happily on your trail

Leaving behind a stench of wickedness

Leaving me nothing but, frail.



Why won’t you just walk away?

Burn; like night to ******* day

Light a match; Fade away

Get this **** underway.
AUTHORS NOTE: My inspiration for this arised from a blog name, 'Trashyconfessions' I randomly came across.
Nov 2011 · 528
There Is Fear In You
Laurie Fisher Nov 2011
You look at me with that look
Of disfavor of my deviate thoughts
Thinking that I'm just an open book
You’re pulling out all your shots
You’re making all your sly comments
Thinking it goes over my head
Without the knowledge of the contents
When I say what you don't want to hear
Who’s the first person to knock it down?
Strike out the fear
So I'll sit back and try not to care
For the lack thereof creativity is all that you fear.
Nov 2011 · 890
Legendary
Laurie Fisher Nov 2011
Your tired of living
Without any doing
Your ready to get out there
And start something moving

Without a moment to spare
Letting go of procrastination
You'll shock and surprise
With the ambition protruding

Now your hot, ready and focused
Your gonna tear though this life
Like no force reckoned
Leaving behind your perpetual legend
Nov 2011 · 1.8k
Let Go
Laurie Fisher Nov 2011
I’ve been so caught up
In procrastination
That I’m walking on egg shells
With a cracking foundation

I’m sweating and shaking
Anxious and fearing
It’s ******* with my mind
And my decision making

I want to be filled
With calmness and peace
Without the train of thought
It will soon, decrease

For now I sit
And clear my mind
The thoughts they come
And they go
Like all of my problems
Swaying in a flow
I’ll wish them good-bye
As I let go
Oct 2011 · 2.2k
Burden
Laurie Fisher Oct 2011
Everyone seems to do, just fine on thier own
How come I can't stand, the thought of being alone
I'm spiraling down
Taking the innocent with me
I don't think I'll ever have the strength, I see in so many.

Darkness and silence surround me,
My horendous thoughts drowned me,
Happiness pursuades me
It pushes and it grinds
But I can't seem to find, the stability
Everyone has but, I.

I pout and vent at those around me
I give off an aura of nothing, but meloncholy
My vibes I send, aren't what you wish
If I could change these emotions
Trust me, I would in a flip

But I am stuck in a state
Of which I cannot explain
Its costing me everything; my life and my friends
None of them can feel, the pain that transends
So why be around me
I'm a burden with no mends.
Oct 2011 · 1.1k
Happiness is a Fallacy
Laurie Fisher Oct 2011
Happiness is not far; yet not too close
The wind whips by, like a chilling ghost
Every thought and every action stands idly by
Until the violent rupture stares me in the eye.

Happiness teases in the most displeasing way
It tricks and alludes in all the common ways
Although your eyes; they cannot see
For it deceives, both you and me

Happiness is a fallacy; this is all that is true
You cannot depend, on anyone but you
You mustn't cry at the alterations
Focus only on, your narration.
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