Idaho Everything I write is little bits and pieces of me, things I'm unable to express in real life. I love to read poetry and find inspiration in the world. I've struggled far too much than is necessary. I hope you enjoy reading what I have to say. 28 followers / 1.4k words
I am the fourteen year old girl held on the bed I am the girl screaming in my sleep I am the girl, crying, alone I am the girl who watched others get hurt.
I am the girl who sent a ****** to prison.
I am my anxiety, Welling like an oncoming flood in my stomach and Hammering in my throat I am my depression, Back and forth, up and down, like a heart rate monitor I am my trauma Held deep in my body, My muscles corded around the pain I can’t get rid of.
I am the girl who defied it all I am the girl who made a difference I am the girl who stood up!
And I am here, I am the girl who is stronger than I ever imagined.
I spent near a quarter of my life thus far doing ****** **** for ****** reasons.
I had *** with boys because I could. It didn't change anything; I was still depressed, lonely, and bitter.
I smoked joints because I wanted to. I drank alcohol because there was nothing better to do. I smoke cigarettes because I was too young.
I spent useless years of my life obsessing over what other people thought of me. I spent meaningless time thinking I was in love with boys who didn't love me. I would have done anything for people who would have done nothing for me. I found myself and I lost myself.
I spent useless, meaningless, empty time thinking everything was fine, only to find myself here and now wondering what the **** I was doing.
So here I am. I will no longer waste my time, because I see that there is value in it.
Today my time is valued and important; do not waste my time.
Today, I found half of a best friend's necklace. It's a simple chain, a charm that has "Best" engraved in a piece of green plastic, a pickle with ogling eyes. It must have been an inside joke, a friend I promised never to forget. I can't remember who. Just a forgotten memory, a long lost friend who I may never see again.