Keeping your hands in your pockets won't keep you warm
in the cold air of a winter night
raging against the warmth of a fire and a place to rest your head
acceptance and satisfaction cracking your lips

The key in a puddle carved like a knife
shattering the icy calm of the little pool
reflecting the thunder clouds above your head
looming like scissors over a barely blooming rosebud

Calamity and discord seems to be your comfort
or are those lies I see glaring in your obtrusive eyes
silence is the last thing you could ever hear
unless it's the cries of a helpless child sighing into the night

Hope never abandoned you
I watched as you burned the unscented candles
the wax waning and the smoke dissapating in contempt
your fingers dancing in the last dip of flame

I watched you disappear into the coming season
observing the ground as you tread
leaving a dull key in that evaporated puddle
the wax molded to your hand and a burn on your palm

We all laughed at her in her seamless white gown
As it folded around her on a barstool in a crowded club

She regarded us with the solemn eyes of a brooding child
Her hair curling and twisting down to her waist

Frail opaque hands holding her chin upon the wooden counter
An untouched apple martini right under her nose

Soft opalescent wings unsettled among writhing bodies
Brushing past her crushing her feathers

We called her a fool for walking into a place like this
Ignorant of the taste of desire and the sweetness of alcohol

She glanced at her foreign reflection waving in the red liquid
Her lips moistened as her fingertips sought the chill of the glass

There was no more laughter as we observed her in an anxious silence
Not fully aware of this pinnacle point in time

The first drop of apple seethed into her tongue
Her wings shivered violently and beautifully as they burst into steam

Her unconscious fingers tore the thread around her thighs
The dress now translucent and sensual, clinging to her curves

With the last sip of that poisonous apple her ruby lips curved into a tempting smile
A strange luster came into her hooded eyes as wisdom became her

She had welcomed the forbidden fruit

porcelein face
red painted lips and cheeks
eyes an unnatural blue
dress older than the skin

withstanding the trials of time
with indifferent eyes
and complacent smile
full of the remembrances of earth
and wisdom of the ancient

yet ageless save the cracks of war

waiting in contempt silence
guiding the sands of time
as the grains fall ceaselessly
around the palms facing the ceiling
of the hourglass proofed of sound
and shielded from change

lifeless and observing
the world turning on its axis
orbiting the glass surrounding the body
capable of reaching out a hand
the embodiment of a forgiving deity
if the people weren't unforgiven
and the land still pure

Walk two moons down the same road
Where willows weep and widows moan
And hasty eyes do turn away
Forgetting you ever passed their way.

Do not stop at the lover's inn
Traverse your glance across its doors
He will not be waiting in the window
Searching for your figure more.

Tears may spill and you may sigh
While you bid the roses sweet goodbye
And mournful melody pulls you on
Towards the light of that new dawn.

Curse this woman's fickle nature,
who allowed that man again to play her.
With love not lost and still held dear,
she walked into his arms unknowing of fear.

footsteps placed carefully
alone in a dark stairwell
girl do you know if
the echoes are heard

sliding of gravel
cracking under bare touch
furling of fingers
clench the shivering teeth

slow breath
quiet breath
listening for nothing
looking into a void

no light, no light
no voice, no figure
yet following close
closing in too quick

motionless and moving
light whispers
omnipotent and unwavering
girl where do you run

guessing for sight
calloused fingertips
against empty walls
surrounded and surrounding

light brush of sound
heart like a drum
dead end, dead end
the reaping of life

I am following an old dirt path
Hoping it will take me far far away
Where thoughts of you can't follow
And plead my resolve to sway

I refuse to believe in false love
Just so I can be near to you
My first love, one in my heart
Oh how can you be so cruel

I truly wanted this to last
This was not some wanton affair
Your lack of complete passion
Has left me in fits of despair

I will not find my way back to you
No, I dare not to turn around
The only thing leading me forward
Is the absolute silence of sound

seekIng blade and drug

Without drIve, simpLe reason

sLeep, endless dreams

yet unmoving

sTill cOnscioUs, only watChing

cannot toucH...

will noT toucH

do not darE to touch

dissatisfaction in simplicity

keeping sanity or insanity

whicheVer it mAy be

unrelentinG desire

the pUrsuit cannot bE...

will not be escaPe

can only be complication

obliqUe undeRstanding

thE hazy LIGHT

I once told you "without you I'd be all alone"
do you remember what you said
you said you loved me

And I believed you, you know I did
I love you
remember when i said it too

I still mean it despite what happened
though you're disbelieving now
it's true, aggravatingly true...

No, I don't blame you for this
both of us were at fault
you can't stop time from changing us

Oh, I don't know if we'll be friends
perhaps when we find ourselves
again I'll come to this place

But despite this being the end
even if you won't say it...
I love you

Slipping, always slipping into the night
I thought I had captured the sun
But in my hands I held the reflection

My love my love                                        Mon amour mon amour      
You leave me blind                                    Vous me quittez aveugle    
Kept in the dark                                         Gardé dans l'obscurité
Where light doesn’t shine                          Où la lumière ne brille pas

My love my love                                        Mon amour mon amour
I am restless                                               Je suis agité
You hold me so tight                                Vous me tenez si serré
I am left breathless                                    On me quitte essoufflé

My love my love                                        Mon amour mon amour
You are cruel                                              Vous êtes cruels
You paint such sweet lies                           Vous peignez de tels mensonges doux
Taking me for a fool                                   La prise de moi pour un imbécile

My love my love                                         Mon amour mon amour
You leave me bereft                                    Vous me quittez privé
Of dignity and hate                                    De la dignité et de la haine
There is nothing left                                    Il n'y a rien

My love my love                                         Mon amour mon amour
You will leave me to die                             Vous me quitterez pour mourir
We cannot go together                              Nous ne pouvons pas aller ensemble
So I will say goodbye                                 Donc je dirai au revoir

My love my love                                      Mon amour mon amour
You gave such sweet thoughts               Vous avez donné de telles pensées douces
Nothing was ever wanting                     Rien ne voulait jamais
In you whom I sought                            Dans vous que j'ai cherchés

You're wallwork. A painted face on the mural we call life. You exist for no purpose, yet you live for reasons unbeknownst to all but the scholars who breathe, speak, and dream life itself.

Who are we to tell tales of God? Of the soul residing in the hearth of our bodies, gradually decaying as time endlessly presses onward, following the path that even our ancestors couldn't conquer.

What do we truly know of Heaven and Hell but the stories of those who have travelled along the brink of life and death, visiting those realms of angels and demons; uninvited but wholly welcome if their stay were for eternity. Only to be brought back by a capricious wind, calling their wayward spirit home.

What right do we have to make assumptions about the very essence that gives us our existence? Our only right is to live. Whether as part of the wallwork that holds the very fabric of life together, or as a star that shines brightly and burns out in a fiery burst, leaving nothing but a trail of dust.

poor girl with a mask on her face
can you really see through those cut-out holes
or are you completely blind
to what's before you, what you are missing
what you are leaving behind

You've seen her, probably more than once
she holds her body to your eyes
but don't get too close, she breathes fire
and lust and smoke from cigarettes

She comes to life in the moonlight
glows in the sun, illuminating her essence
while hiding the dark sins
glowering in her heart like embers
of hate and pity and disgust

In her head is only room for fun
pure enjoyment as you struggle
only wood under her feet, piling higher
she dances above you
where your cries and pleas do not reach
she is in with the gods
telling secrets that bring men to their knees

compared to an old man
with gentle expectations
held in higher contempt
yet silently more brilliant
mine are high and out of reach
stirring restlessly
seeping into my thoughts
taking me farther
and farther away from reality
how envious I am of the man who lives peacefully
while insinuating expectations only of death
and what may come as his last breathe escapes him forever
does he rise up to brush hands with God or
fall down to the deepest part of Hell with tortuous solemnity
oh how I wish I did not think so highly of life
and her coy ways of playing with my every movement
taunting me like a bird does a grounded kitten
who can only observe as the bird soars ever higher over her head
singing the melody she can only associate blindly with her life

Oh silly little bird
Weren’t you ever told
If you play with the snake
Death will take hold

A glance quickens the pulse
A smile reddens the face
A word rattles the mind
A touch speeds the pace

A laugh brightens the glow
An embrace heightens the heat
Invitation brings them closer
Until their can lips meet

Perception would be reality if a daydream were the day
A nightmare would be the night if it had its way
A candle would be life if fire was its essence
And haze would be so clear if the truth was not so dense.

I am twisting in your grasp
Reaching, recoiling, breathing
Tasting cigarettes and sweat
Disappearing the second I let go and
I find myself intertwined with sheets
Cool  and unfeeling like the sky beyond the window pane
Who was I searching for, my desire?
The name of a faceless man who holds me when I sleep
Whose taste and scent have permeated my core
Until he has become the air itself
Wrapping around my body, softer than the caress of silk
Lingering on my skin. Yet again I wake with empty arms
And the heavy ache of love and lust on my tongue
Pulsating in my fingertips, but why
This love always leaves me hollow, haunting me
With the sweet promise of return as soon as my eyes close
So I keep awake until coaxed with his voice, a lullaby humming in my ear
Bringing me closer and closer still
Only once more, I tell myself then nevermore will
I give in to incubus who softly calls my name each night
Once more and I will become the insomniac who dreams of you while waking

Give into me
I am desire
No need to wait
I am fire

Give into me
I am lust
Feel your way
I am trust

Give into me
I am greed
Twist and turn
I am need

Give into me
I am light
No need for wings
I am flight

We were burning
Hands ice cold to the touch
Caught on fire
And nowhere to run.

You gave me light
I gave you warmth
Lit with a bolt
Brought on by the storm.

Yet kindle wanes
Like stone erodes
And a roaring flame
Breaks off into streams.

You will not catch
Each drop of gold
Nor can you dig
To find the stone.

Ashes to ashes
Dust to dust
We cannot thrive
Upon ground earth.