Oh captain, my captain.
Why did you jump ship
and leave your loyal crew
with nothing left to grip?

If you can't treat her like royalty,
let someone else.

"Ooh, you look happy today!"

I tell him he's seeing things.

"Alright, sunshine. Who is he?"

I laugh. Really, I can't hold it back.

"Don't laugh! I know the signs!"

I laugh again. How can he tell?

"You're laughing, but those gold eyes are telling me I'm right! Who is he?"

I give up. I describe you, of course, but leaving out... minor details.

I tell him that you're one of the most intelligent people I know.
I tell him that you're beautiful (that should have tipped him off).
I tell him that I care about you more than I ever thought possible.

"He sounds like a great guy. You like him a lot, don'tcha?
He better not hurt you. Let me know if I have to beat him up for you."

I double over in laughter. He's a fool.

"But you still didn't tell me his name, sunshine. What is it?"*

I lean in close and grab his tie, which smells like the alcoholic drinks he mixes.

**"Her name is Rachel."

Let me pour my beating heart into yours

Two loving parents,
who did everything they could for us kids, though they were a little strict...
One older brother,
who would die for his little sisters, though he picked on them constantly...
One younger sister,
who never failed to make her family smile, though she was always so oblivious...

And then there's me.
One middle child,
who tried so very hard, though she couldn't stop herself from becoming this closed off...

But I'm not that little kid anymore.
I've grown past that.
My, how I've grown...
And I didn't even realize it until recently.
Who is this mature at the young age of sixteen?
Who thinks about the things I think about?
Who talks the way I do?
My grandma has always told me
"Leigh, there's nothing wrong with being an old soul.
Embrace it.
You're keeping the past generation alive."

Oh, but grandma...

*This old soul is ready to die.

A whole year of
Laughter and chemistry
Tears and memories
Time and patience
Anxiety and embraces
Safety and angels
Love...
I've loved you for a year
Say you'll let me love you for more

You, a restless ocean heart,
swim against the rising tide.

Steal a glance in the mirror.
Tear stains are evident, plain as day.
Pain sits in dark circles under your expressionless eyes.
You're the definition of "pathetic".
...Do you think she didn't notice?
You're wearing last night on your face.

You held my hand in the darkness
and I felt like
I
was
*flying

Your love
is a gift
I am not worthy of.

This love is bright and sharp and electric in its clarity.

I washed my bed sheets before you came over
in hopes that if they were clean,
your scent would linger once you left.

And now that you've gone?

They smell like sunlight on a spring day.

They smell like love in the morning.

So I burrow myself next to your heart and count the time that's passed.
Wonderful...
They smell like
*you.