Look what the wind
Just blew in Again
Whistling through the cracks in my door
I should’ve known, you would show up
When the cuts were not hurtin’ no more

Welcome back baby
Sit on Down
Sit on Down
Have a cup of what I have found
Since your love ain’t been around

Baby, you’ve been gone
This time too long
I’ve run outta you

Last candlelight
Flickered and died
Shining on time without you
Tell me how long, how long
Can I go on?
When you’re just gonna do what you’re gonna do.

Welcome back baby
Sit on Down
Sit on Down
Have a Cup of what I have found.
Since your love ain’t been around
Baby, you’ve been gone this time too long
I’ve run outta of you.

I don’t need it.
It’s no good for me.
I can’t bleed it.
Veins gone empty
I’ll repeat it.
It’s no good for me.
It’s no good.
No good.
No good.

Baby, you’ve been gone this time too long
I’ve run outta of you.
Out of you.
Baby, you’ve been gone this time too long
I’ve run outta of you.
Hey.
I’ve run outta you.
I’ve run outta you.
I’ve run outta you.
I’ve run. out you.
Oh Oh.  I’ve run outta you.
Out of you.
I can’t take no more
I can’t break no more
Over You
Over You

If there's anything I've learned in the past year, it's that Normal people don't change. Normal people don't change. But then there's Abnormal people. The movers, the thinkers, the innovators, the shifters. They, unlike Normal people, see what they can become and change their lives firsthand. Normal people don't. They wallow and swallow, playing the victim to Life. False positivity crushes the Normal mind. Isn't it wonderful, being Abnormal?

For so long, I wanted to die.
Now I'm not ready --
*I've just begun living.

These sheets hold the scent of your skin like your hands hold the warmth of my heart

I didn't mean to let you see
I didn't mean to let the walls down
But once they're down, they're crumbling  
And there's no way I can rebuild them with this cement
You've seen too much
You've seen too much

I was ***** by someone who "loved" me.
Why should I be afraid of strangers?

Making friends is like
building up castles from sand...
With one sweep of the hand
or one whisper from the lips
and the castle comes crashing down,
tumbling into your lap
and leaving you
helpless.
I promise that I won't
let this castle fall
or get the slightest bit
damaged.

I've spent
the past week
trying to muster up
a piece of writing
that could even
come close
to expressing
my love for
you.

In those seven days,
I took a different approach.
I wrote
2 haikus
   with my hands
3 ballads
   with my lips
and
4 sonnets
    with my heart.

No,
my love may not
be poured into
a poem --
typed up
and posted here --
but  
it's there and
it's real and
it breathes.

Sometimes, midnight thoughts override everything.
Even the ability to sleep, to shut down the station in my head.
Staring into the dark corners of a bedroom doesn't seem to help.
Thinking of you at 12:03 PM doesn't seem to help either.
So what happened last night?
I slipped into the newly-washed sheets and closed my eyes...
Your face appeared.
It was the face you were wearing last time we were together.
The cautiousness behind those green eyes was not opaque, love.
You stoped yourself.
From watching my lips when I spoke to you...
From watching my hands when I worked...
From watching my eyes whenever you discreetly tested the uncharted waters of the Ocean of Us.
But I saw you.
How sly you must've thought you were (are).
But you weren't, really.
Because at midnight, the unconcious deductions I formed that day awoke from their shallow graves...
                                                       ­                And I saw you.
                                                          ­                                  ...the definition of "sleeplessness".

In a relationship, there should never be a time where your partner says "But if you loved me, you'd __". Flat out.  A healthy relationship is about giving yourself to that person, self giving, when you feel ready. A selfish partner expects you to do certain things out of love for them. I'm not explicitly talking about ***, but it's in between the lines.

A selfish love is one that takes and takes but doesn't completely give back. You give yourself up to a selfish partner because you think it's going to satiate them, satisfy their needs. But it never does, does it? If you set boundaries and your partner doesn't accept them -- leave.

A self giving love is one that gives patiently and doesn't necessarily take. It's a love that constantly seeks permission where permission is needed. You communicate to express how you feel, openly and honestly. If you set boundaries and your partner tries their best to accept them because they love you as a person -- stay.

I know you're contemplating suicide.
I know you're wishing your pain would end.
But you are not your pain...
So don't let it become you.

We all seem to depend on something -- drugs, sleep, music, ***, "love", relationships -- but when will we realize that the only thing we can solely depend on is ourselves?

I'm finally speaking up
I'm finally letting it out

I used to think, darlin', you never did nothin'
But you were always up to somethin'
Always had a run in, yeah
I got to think those days are comin' to get ya
Now no body want to protect ya
They only want to forget ya

You'll be on my mind
Don't give yourself away
To the weight of love

No.

Please do not act as if you're my best friend again.
It's been too long.

Don't text me saying "I miss you, let's hang out" if you aren't going to follow through with it.
Don't ask me how my relationship is going if you're just going to cut off the conversation with a perverted joke.
Don't pretend to be my best friend if you're just going to *leave me.

I've always said
"You're the only person who's never left me."

...But now I see that's not quite true.

You've left me over and over and over.

You haven't glanced back at me, the girl who never stopped loving your heart full of fear.

But I got over it.
I moved on.
I don't need you anymore, bud.

your stupidity baffles me

You have to sing quieter
So soft no one can hear
It's an alto's time to shine
I'm singing loud and clear

When did I stop saying "I" and start saying "We"?

You can't look me in the eye
You can't stand to hear my song
You can't be in the same room
I've won
Finally... *I've won

In my dreams,
I write poetry on her skin.
The pen moves gently and with compassion.
Words of love join hands,
waltzing across
her collarbones
   her waist
      her hips
covering her entirely.
I take my time, marking her arms with lyrics of adoration to cover
scars of self hatred.
"You are so beautiful."
She cries.
"This is beautiful."
I smile.
*"Oh, my love... the best have yet to be written."

Shut up and kiss me quick
Run your lips over my pulse
Drag your nails across my hips
Grip the hem of my shirt and pull  
You won't hurt me
I am not antique glass
I will not break
Go ahead
Try

"I was just a kid, I didn't know what to do... so I did nothing."

*"That's not true... you survived."

We all see each other in the hallway
   in between classes, at lunch, at 3:15
      but do we honestly see each other?
Do we see these poems, these words
   that are often full of darkness and misunderstandings
       but sometimes light and forgiveness?
I see you, friends of mine
   hiding in the shadows of our legacy
      ...but do you see me?

I may have switched gears,

left and down
lust
right and up
love

but trust me,
love was all I was feeling.

We're above the influence
Alcohol is for Them
But here We are
Drunk as happy hour regulars

You're disgusting
Pure filth
No amount of "love"
Could change you

I found peace atop a Ferris wheel
wedged in the space between our fingers

I wish I'd never met you
I wish I'd never heard your name

"I wish you weren't so..."

"So...what?"

"I don't know... dark? Yeah. Dark."

if I could be any less dark, I would.
I'd be less dark for you.
white as snow.
but aren't I?
you only see what I want you to see.
am I dark, boy?
is that the word you use to describe me to your friends?

d
a
r
k*

it could mean many things...
gloomy.
deep.
depressing.

so which am I, *boy?
how about you let me into that shallow mind?
let me see what you're thinking about me.

I would **** for you
but you wouldn't lift a finger
for me

It's out now
Someone in authority knows
This will either help
Or go up in flames

Everything feels so right with you
My heart threatens to overflow

Your eyes
play music
of the softest violin
up
down
the melody sways
with the shifting light
of hidden love

You're a fool, Jesus Christ.
How can I help you?

I find myself
wondering what
your hand
would feel like
in mine.