let's hear it for
    these angsty
         weepy poems
from our broken hearts
  well
      maybe we should
pretty boys
      and pretty girls
we forget
   all of us
how fragile we are
     let's
         isolate ourselves
            in our feelings
(they hurt)
   when we forget ourselves
and love
    too hard
and miss
    too much
and want
    too suddenly
without knowing
   just how deep
we're digging ourselves
      when it hits, it hurts
our words
  are our
    defense
we mean them
i mean them
                   for you.
It's worth it, this
                       fragility
for our childish bliss
     in reckless, disasterous
                                                      abandon.

It could be that I
Have misheard these words before
But the stench of them all
Reminds me
That they’re real
And it is there that they sit
Staring back to say
Nothing
Other than the inverted intentions
That these hands of character have affirmed
In both my eyes as well as
Yours

Mind is a cello;
Inspiration, its bow.
Love, its timbre.

Just

the

Wind

Of


Your

Voice

From

When

You

Say

My


Name


Could


Make

Me


Float

Away

But

That's okay


It's all okay

you get mad at me often
because we don't speak the same language
or because as much as i listen to your
boy-hood fantasies
i still only here the voice of someone
scared
to just be a woman.
It's difficult for someone
who just wants to be a man.

you call me a hypocrite.
walking around with a mirror for a face
while I scream at everything else for having
the same face
or closed-mouth laugh
or the tongue in between her teeth.

you get mad at me because
i tell you to be direct
but i can't never seem to tell you what i mean
by "I love you"
or "I don't know".

As I breathe
the music on my shoulder is  kicking it's legs
and sighing
with bells on its shoes
and freezing cold finger tips

As I listen
the breathe in my head is speaking
in the lowest tones
of the brightest colors
and I keep reminding myself for some reason
that they're just words.

aren't they?

I don't know.

I love you.

It would be this one
It will tell you alot
                            
                          Dear

I had a note for you I scratched on this envelope
but it was ruined in the rain
it used to read so well
now the only word not melted is

                         Jessica

Ruined. So I picked up my pencil sure that this time
Just this once I could write words enough to make you mine
but there
alone on the page in naked pencil waiting

                          I

But i can't start with i
that is so selfish
so
i
begin to go agian
trying to make a something out of all the nothing
but its hard to name a poem so how 'bout let's call it

                       Love

No GOD NO
that is way too tacky
what would she think
So embarassing
So childish
So simple
You don't deserve the simple
You deserve the incredible
The awe-inspiring fire


                                  You

and there it stops me
lost and more lost
because when I think of you
all the fire is kindled


                                   You
are my evreything

so i put down this pencil
and write in my head
a future I have seen once or twice
in the lonely corner of a dream



                                     Dear Jessica I love you
                        I carved on that tree
                        In the noise of summer bugs claws birds wings breeze
                        I saw you smile walking towards me
                        Your feet silent on the blanket of the warm grassy ground
                         Your pale feet smeared with mud
                        It was in a june, july or august
                        A quiet summer dream
                         Me and you far out in nowhere
                        As the record singer plays the song
                         "Together"
                            (that song)

                        In a meadow
                          Dreaming
                        I know I felt it in the warm of your hair
                        When you wrapped your arms around me
                        You kissed me soft on the neck
                         I felt your skin as you squeezed me
                         Your eyes were so close
                          Close to my mind
                          and in a moment of your laughter
                           and in a moment of your joy
                                          a moment forgetting
                            life and all the noise
                            
                         I felt your breath sweet
                         I felt your whisper soft
                            melting the glue in my mind
                        In my dream I knew you kissed me
                         In my life you will never see me
                        
                I traded this moment for all that I had
                      and rode the river Styx to the belly of hell
                       and rode the river Styx while humming that song

i seem to have lost words again.
the sense of desperation i feel over this is palpable.
i wonder, where did they go? who can i blame?
and will they ever return to me?

oh muse, you are an unfaithful lover
i gave my heart to you and you've taken
it and skipped town.

What an odd feeling it is
when you happen to look and see
an old and blurry photograph
and you think "How could this be me?"

How odd a feeling it is
when you think back to that day
the you from now wasn't yet then
then you was there to stay

Such an odd feeling it is
when you suddenly realize
that you would look as alien
as then you now looks in your eyes

You've grown and shifted
         your mind has sifted
out your childish ways

            Carefree thoughts
that simply cannot
           exist in your mind today

What an odd feeling it is
to look at that photo and say
who is that kid and however did
he end up here today?