My Zen priest
taught me
to eat ****
like fruit.

My Zen priest
taught me
to catch thoughts.

My Zen priest
taught me
to exclaim
the word "**", loudly.

My Zen priest
taught me
that the purpose of life
is to make as much money
as you possibly can.

Don't be suckered
by a Zen priest.

So I was doing
my Kuan Yin practice
when I bowed
to a white sculpture
of her
and decided to listen
so she thought to me
"I will tell you
anything you want
to know...
you just have to ask."
so I pondered awhile
and thought,
"What is it?"
and she thought back,
"It is what you think it is."
so I asked,
"Who am I?"
and she thought back,
"You are what you think you are."
so I thought,
"I love you, Kuan Yin."
and blew out the candle.

So my elderly mother
who I am taking care of
was in bed
for a month or so
and she yelled to me
that she had to go
to the bathroom
but she couldn't stand up
so she told me to change
her protective underwear
and when I did
I saw that she
was covered with black diarrhea
so I cleaned it off
as best I could
and she tried to stand up
but collapsed on the floor
so I called 911
and the men came
and said
"Internal bleeding".

Us hippies and straights
from the baby boomer generation
grew up with two great television myths
which determined how
we turned out
and they are
"The Wizard Of Oz"
and
"Peter Pan"
and every year
as we grew up
they were the TV events
on Sunday night
so as we got older
we went to Oz
like on LSD and stuff
and realized
that we wanted to go back
to Kansas
but like Peter Pan
we didn't want to grow up
so we didn't
so here am I,
an old baby boomer,
back at his childhood home
in Kansas, Michigan
and I still refuse to grow up.
I wish I could fly.

At a Zen temple
I chanted
and blended in
with the Sangha
as though
we were all one being
with one voice,
so another time
I decided
to stand out
as an individual
and chant in my own way,
and then another time
I couldn't keep up
with the group singing
and was kind of
left out of it,
so the world is
one world
with one heart
and one love
as I just read
in another poem,
but this brings up
love and fear
as some think
about the human family
while others think about
One World Government,
and some think
about imagining one world
at peace
while others think about
Business Globalization,
so I think
this is life
and we should embrace
whatever comes
because whatever
will come
and I try
to approach
this one world
with fearlessness
and equanimity.

Buddha says
to have no outflows
and I have recently noticed
that I have powerful outflows
in my meditation practice
so I decided to try
some new practices
which are nothing new
and they are
just sitting,
just standing,
and just dancing,
and those sound simple
but there is more to it
that you might imagine.

The body
needs a direction
to go in
so it needs someone
to guide it,
like the mind
where I sit,
invisibly,
guiding the body
and the mind,
and I have learned
a thousand techniques,
none of which truly work,
so I get lost
because the body/mind
without guidance
can certainly
get into trouble.

There's a lot of news
these days
about the one percent
who have all the money
and the ninety nine percent
of us
who don't have much
of anything
so I got thinking
about how sad and unfortunate
it must be
to be the one percent
with stalkers and identity thieves
and the media attacks
and the hatred towards them
and how they have to protect themselves
in their fortresses
clinging to their fortunes
dreaming like Citizen Kane
of the happy times
in their chilhood, sledding,
when they were poor
while us ninety nine percent
who are the lucky ones
like me with my income of poverty
are greedy for a piece of them
so I even want a million dollars
even though I have enough
of everything
so I don't know if any of this
is true,
but think of a rich person
sitting on his toilet...
where is his money then?

When I get out of bed
at night,
the mind is quite nuts
because it is on auto-pilot,
and stuck in an in-between
dream and awakening state,
and the autonomic nervous system
is what is working,
in it's automatic way,
but I get nervous
that maybe some demons
crawled into my ears
while I was asleep,
so I begin to meditate,
and that calms me,
but I shouldn't be afraid
of that lizard mind
because it could well
be illuminating.

"Practice
a deep, warm flowing
give and take
of the radiation
to the exclusion
of all"
is a dharma
which has been growing
inside of me
for a few days
that I am ready
to file away
so I am giving
it to you
in the hope
that it helps.

There's this
cigarette
burning to my left,
that I just picked up
and took a puff from,
so then I adjusted it's ash
and took another drag,
and it's got some good qualities
and it's got some bad qualities,
but what I see
is it's quality,
this white paper
smoking round
thing with the line
and lettering
that I just pick up
and smoke.

Pushing my mother
in her wheelchair
through the forest
in the park,
I see my sister
picking up a leaf
and handing it
to mom
who asks
what should I do with it
and I suggest
using it
as a bookmark
for her daily words
and so I put the red leaf
in her pocket
and we roll on.

Two of my Zen friends
who, at the time,
I thought were some kind
of Zen enemies,
seemed to condemn me
to a soap opera
of eternal cookies
and the sound of lawnmowers,
and it took me
forty-some years
to understand this koan,
and the suburban heaven
that I was condemned to,
where instead of a life
in the forest
with snakes and mosquitos,
or a life in the city
with rats and roaches,
I was given
a life in this quiet, rich suburb
with an air-conditioned summer
and a toasty warm winter,
so that surrealistic understanding
of cookie and lawnmower hell,
turned into everyday Nirvana.

Welcome to the age
of information
when we are blessed
by wireless waves
passing through
our body/minds
and awakened
by the electronic chemistry
of the computer,
the television,
the radio,
all the little
electrical gizmos
which are everywhere,
so I wonder
what is this doing
to our brains?
so this is not a forest anymore
and it's no wonder
that we can't quieten our minds
no matter how we try
so why don't we just
learn to love
the new electromagnetic ocean
and float on our sea
of meaningless thoughts?

My Zen master said
that he had never heard
of the word "ego"
until he got to the States
so in Zen circles
I often hear
that the ego
is like some kind of enemy thing
or something like that
but I think
"Who is it that practices?
Who is it that takes Buddha vows?
Who is it that takes Bodhisattva vows?
Who is it that learns Dharma?
And really now,
who actually is it
that is our authentic self?"
to which I think
Ego!
so I would suggest
that you don't go pushing
your ego around,
it just might be
your Buddha.

They say
we all have
our down days
and I have
many depressed days
about twice a month
when the mind
gets sad, then angry,
then sad again,
but then one day
I wake up
and everything
is better,
and everyday life
becomes Nirvana to me
once again,
so I can't find
any cure
for this yoyoitis
except sitting alone,
smoking cigarettes,
and thinking.

I signed up
as a young hippie
on the side
of the losers
in the world,
the poor, the homeless,
the refugees, the starving,
the mentally ill, the physically disabled,
and so on
so that is where
I am,
on the losing side
here with us poor poets
who work long hours
for nothing,
but I figured it out
that even though
I am depressed
about my place in life,
this place is what I love
and the people
like me
are the people
that my heart goes out to,
so I'll try
to cheer up
because even if all is lost,
all is not lost.

Buddha taught
about "mere words"
since words
in one sense
are like numbers
without any real meaning
like they're all Greek to me
but I think
being something
like a poet
that words
can be powerful
with the capability
of transforming lives
by the process
of the links
that occur
in the mind,
connecting a myriad
of connotations
and denotation
that set off
a potent brain chemistry
that can make the difference
between a kind of sanity
and a kind of madness.

The first thing
that comes to mind
is the reality
of a working earth
where everything
works perfectly
with its imperfection
and where we all
get what we need
even if it doesn't seem like it
and a presence
which is not a being
as I see it
but an emptiness
that is as beautiful
as space
from which anything
is born.

I just go beboping around
happily
until I come
to a dharma gate
which is an obstacle
that can be inside
or it can be outside
and I think
the purpose
of these gates
is to test
us practitioners
to see if we
can continue on,
so this morning
I came to a big, nasty
dharma gate
put there inside
by a pretty lady
and as I have discovered
along the path
the only way
to get through
one of these doors
is with love.

The twentieth century artists
took art all the way
to nothingness
and I love it
so I say
that there's no
wrong way
to do art,
since there are
no real rules
and wrong art
is sometimes better
than right art,
but it seems to me
that if the artist
wants to get somewhere
they have to do it
daily
for their whole lifetime.

The first type
of thoughts
in my head
is music
which sings
like a heavenly
broken record
and the second type
of thoughts
in my head
is the arising mind
which seems like
the voice
of another being
and the third type
of thoughts
in my head
is the willed voice
which most think
is their self
and the trick
to mental health
is to love
all three
and allow them
to sing and speak
in balance and harmony
like a poem
with music.

I became celibate
quite a few years ago
only in part
because of religious reasons
but probably mostly because
the *** was so bad
so after I became celibate
and after much meditation
I experienced a new kind of ***
for me,
these internal *******
from kundalini flow
and to me,
it is better than regular ***
and I have it
much more frequently
like entire days of ******
so that sometimes
I think that I am not celibate
but actually
have become
a bit too promiscuous.

Here is a way
to instant relative nirvana -
ask yourself
if you're comfortable,
ask yourself
if you're satisfied,
ask yourself
if life is satisfactory,
if the answer is yes,
proceed -
obviously you are awake
obviously you are free
(even if you are in jail
your body/mind is free)
so now,
here in the moment
look at what's in front of you -
Presto!
Nirvana!
(if you want to perceive
the nirvana element,
ask the seer
to see
the seer
and maybe
you'll see
the emptiness).

We clean
and then it
gets *****
so we clean
and then it
gets *****
and we get sick
and then
we get well
and we even get drunk
and then
we get sober
so we clean
and then it
gets *****
and for better
and for worse
we are married
to this cycle of life
so let's all try
to stay in love
and enjoy eternity.

They seem to me
to have to live
in a public nightmare
of being known
even though nobody knows
and it seems to me
to be a surrealistic hell
of flashing lights
and strangers
who know everything
without knowing anything
and people want
a piece of them
and people even
take potshots at them
so us little people
should probably be happy
that we're not famous.

When I was a kid
the news of a cold war
was everywhere
and they were going
to bury us
so every time
an airplane flew over
or a test plane
made a sonic boom
I thought it was
the end
and then the presidents
got into an argument
over missiles
and everybody thought
it would be
the end
but one backed down
and the bombs
weren't dropped.

Being angry
inside
is a good thing
because it makes me
feisty and awake
and being broken
sitting in a chair
with a blanket
around me
is a good thing
because a change
for the better
always seems to follow
and having a bad day
when I don't feel like doing anything
is a good thing
because it always seems
to lead to a better place
so these events
are like the next to last chords
of a cadence
which are more dissonant
and which lead home
and sleeplessness
is a good thing
because we are awake.

I was in
a bar
a few years ago,
talking to a man
and a woman,
and the woman said
that the man made
fancy, expensive pens,
so I said that I had
a woody
and they both laughed loudly,
so I said that really
I had a pen called a woody
and they said that
a woody is another word
for *******
and I said oh
and the woman looked down
at my crotch.

I was thinking this morning
and it gave me a problem
so after many attempts
at right thinking
I came up
with the non-dual dharma of
neither thinking nor not thinking
and that seemed to help
but I know
that there is no dharma
of enlightenment
so that doesn't help
the thinking problem
or does it?

Miles Davis was cool
and sort of invented the word
so when I was young
we all said this word
and I found out
that the next generation
says this word too
so I was angry today
because I thought
I was pathetic
when it dawned on me
that I was a cool guy
just like all my old friends
were cool guys and girls
so I thought about it
and decided that everybody
in my life
was pretty cool
so I thought
"I don't know if everybody
has the Buddha nature
like they say,
but I do know
that everybody
has the cool nature
to some degree"
so I felt better.

I have, on my computer,
two sound generating devices
which I meditate on
for healing reasons
and I am on
a Dharma network
which has photographs
of Yantras, which are those
geometrical designs
that I meditate on
for healing reasons
and I don't know
if I am healed by these things
or not
but it sure is a trip!

It's my birthday
and I'm fifty-nine
and I heard a song
by a paranoia producing
songwriter
who said that
it was too late
and this message
seems to come through
to us often
so I know I shouldn't say never
but I'm saying it
and it's not too late
and even if I die right now,
death is no end to life
and even then
it's not too late
and then comes the question,
"Too late for what?"
"This?".

Naturally, I don't know
anything about this
but it has occurred to me
that maybe we have it all wrong
about the Anti-Christ
like maybe he or she
is not so bad after all
since it is God,
whoever that is,
that wants to **** us all
because he's probably
the big everything
so what he says goes
and God and His Son
then, have some idea,
according to the Bible
to **** just about all of us
so maybe the Anti-Christ
is some man or woman
who wants to save us all
and this 666 stuff,
which is the sign of the beast
is the sign of the animals
because animals are beasts
so he or she wants to save
all of the animals, too,
of course, the poor Anti-Christ
doesn't stand a chance
against the big everything
who can do whatever he wants
so maybe we've got it all wrong
about this stuff.

"Who am I?"
Me, but not
the word me.
"What am I?"
A man but not
the word man.
"Where am I?"
Here but not
the word here.
"When am I?"
Now but not
the word now.
"Why am I?"
Because I'm me,
a man, here and now,
but not those words.
"How am I?"
Fine.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
I don't know...

I come from a past
of relentless suffering
that is a place
called Samsara
which is none other
than life,
so now I reside
in a place
that is a paradise
called Nirvana
which is none other
than life,
and the difference
is a simple understanding
which depends on how you look
at life
but in order to get here
I needed much work
at self-imposed brain-washing
or should I say
Mind-Cleansing.

This is the place
where, as the poet said,
"All is desert"
and I am deserted
so it is where
I am sitting in a chair
listening to a ticking clock
and I crave
some action
like I thought
I used to have
and the phone rings
so my heart rises
only to sink
as it is a charity
wanting my money,
but here comes the surprise -
boredom is the transcendent thing
that is the empty life
of peace
that is so beautiful,
so as I am sitting here
in this lighted desert
I remember.

This summer
has been hot
but the mornings
are quite nice
as I have been
sitting outside
with a cup of tea
by the flowers
with the chair
placed strategically
on the bricks
and I think
"Oh, I get it...
life actually is good."

So this morning
I was tired
and passing out
on the chair
so I decided
as a good Buddhist
to wake up
and defeat sleepiness
so I went
out to the patio
where it was cool
and meditated
dropping off occasionally
until at last
after much trying
I defeated sleep
and woke up
and Buddha has said
that sleep is the closest thing
to death.

Why do poets
seem to know me
when they don't know me
at all
and so we say
how much we love
each other
but we're looking
at a computer
and I love
the computer
and I love you
I guess
but I don't know
who the heck you are.

I have a blockage
in my head
caused by an old broken nose
so it creates
a headache
that neither helps
nor hinders
and when life
presents an obstacle
I go around it
by just paying.

Young people
really feel
a lot of pain
as do older people
who have more time
to get used to it,
and I have found
that I always hurt
and the best I can do
is to sit in a chair,
even sleep
is painful
and I think
that everybody else
and even maybe
everything else
has this kind of pain,
like the fly
in the basement
probably has
arthritis,
and a Zen master
once said
"Even if you get
to the very bottom
of Zen meditation,
there is still
suffering"
so oh well,
no pain,
no something or other.

I have a hunch
that it is eternal
and infinite
although I don't
know it
and I have contemplated
these things
deeply
and when I do
I get frightened
so there is big eternity
and big infinity
and there is small eternity
and small infinity
and what is so surprising
is that we
are all part of it
and are it
so I can say
that me sitting here
in a suburb
of Detroit
is eternal and infinite
and that's
far out.

After coffee
I do seven practices
which are short
like "Lifting The Sky"
and "Carrying The Moon"
and "Tapping"
and "Nianjuli"
and "The Opera Singer's Warm-up"
and "Yoga/Zen/Reflexology/Chi Kung"
and "The Tune Up"
and then I finish off
by meditating
healing vibrations
toward the tumor
in my crotch
which I won't let
the doctors touch.

Buddha tells us
not to get into
interpreting dreams
so in a dream
my dead father
told me to go
to the post office
at nine in the morning
for something
that was sent
by planned parenthood
and I got
a free laptop.

Devo says,
"We must repeat"
and so it goes
day in and day out
same old, same old
but we know better
actually
because change occurs
moment by moment
and everything
changes,
although it seems
the same.

This computer acts
as a drug to me
and so does the TV
and my vitamins
and my exercises
and my cigarettes
and my posture
and the light in this room
and the roomscape of sound
so the electro-magnetic bio-chemical man
is constantly ******.

Buddha talked about
the elephant
who travels alone
without master or friend
as company
and a friend of mine
asked me
to be his friend
but I said
I was an elephant
so he looked disheartened
and I knew what a foolish elephant
I was.

There is only one door
to the world
and it is always open
so come in
with your eyes
and focus
on the big everything
which this is
and it is also
just your plain old
everyday life.

She had to put
her dog down,
the dog that she took
on many walks
on many mornings,
the dog who was so pretty
that people always commented,
and when she had put
her dog down,
she felt like a killer
and our hearts
were torn.