just stop
it hurts
this pain so deep

what do i do with it?
she said yes!
how can i stop it?

i found someone way hotter
is that all i am?
physical attractiveness?

that's all i was
she was better?

awful red hair
you never liked

so what if she's a 32DDD?
like my body for me

i'm not pretty
and now

i realize i wasn't pretty
in your eyes
either

i'll never be
pretty

because you hurt so bad
and i'm scarred everywhere

i don't know how to
move on

i just want
to be held

and loved
without ifs, ands, or buts

but for now
just stop the pain

i am the wicked one
i am the ******
when I am near
the world goes black

i recognize who i am
do you know who you are
my guardian angel
by my side all along

i hate myself
never you
i caused you pain
made you hurt

she still haunts me
that fiery *****
she touched your soul
after i was blinded

i want her gone
i want her dead
i want her to suffer
for making you happy

she gave you a false sense of happiness yet still
you wrote for her
you sang for her
you gave everything for her

you would have chose her
had you not seen
your charge
a destructive mess

i am the wicked
all i deserve
is to die alone
and you **** me with love
love that i don't deserve
that makes me cry
because i will never live up to you
because you have stopped believing  i would ever live up to you

*my wicked guardian angel

I can kiss you
but ****** if you kiss me first
****** if you even show for a second
that you want me like i want you

I reach for your hand
but ****** if you grab mine first

I love running my fingers through your hair
but ****** if you brush your fingers through my hair

You're so handsome
but ****** if you tell me i'm beautiful

i need you sometimes
but ****** if you let me know you want me

my fingers can ghost over your skin
but ****** if you touch me at all

i can kiss every inch of you
but ****** if you kiss my forehead

i always listen to your troubles
but ****** if you lay a comforting hand on me

i turn to you for support
but ****** if you rest your head on my shoulder

i love sleeping next to you
barely enough space between us
but ****** if you want to cuddle with me

i know that you want everything that i do
but ****** if you will ever admit it

do you realize
what you do to me

i give
and give

And want
and need

but you don't give in
not to my needs

but maybe to hers
always to her

do you remember
our day?

you remember
her day

the day of you and her
never to see the day of you and me

It comes to my attention
what a ******* hypocrite you are
whisper love into my ear
and then tear me apart

i'm very simple in how i feel
i love you with my entire soul
but my words are like silence to you
and my actions make you blind

it's fine for you to be jealous
as long as you hold me in your arms
i'm completely yours, you know it
take advantage

all i ask is that you listen
listen to my heart as you pull the trigger
as the bullet connects
as my frail glass heart shatters

and i'll bandage your fingers
as you piece it back together again