Way back in my younger days, I joined the male voice choir
I was unaware of lurking gents, or **** men for hire
Praying on the innocent, might invoke brimstone and fire
Old and dark back passage ways, are not what I desire

There were boys and there were men, all singing at Saint Mary's
What I didn't realise is, ****** orientation sometimes varies
Just how many church goers, are gay high flying fairies
I didn't know I was amongst, a bunch of Julian Clary's

I may not be religious, I only came along to sing
And participate in ceremonies, and to hear the church bells ring
Gay gentleman I did not expect, I did not suspect a thing
Particularly the disgusting type, that want to slip you Black Pudding

I like a nice hot chocolate, but your type I do not search
Should you be in a religious place, like Saint Mary's church ?
Ogling all the younger boys, sat behind them on your perch
Your singing is a false front, because your just on the lurch

It creeps me out to even think, your in a house of god
The only thing your worshiping, is young arses to sod
Underage *** is blasphemy, but you don't think that is od
Your willing to commit sinful acts, to satisfy your stinking rod

Innocence gives you an excuse, and your sense to stalk and pray
You invited me for a coffee, I didn't realise you were gay
I saw you in White Lion Walk, and you lead my astray
What happened to the coffee shop, cos it wasn't far away

I ended up at your flat, not knowing you were bent
And you fancied a piece of ****, from an underaged pure gent
Because I like my coffee strong, didn't mean I was for rent
You came out in a dressing gown, and asked "are you confident"

I wasn't sure on what you meant, I know I was naive
You had nothing on except your gown,  and something up your sleeve
My comfort zone was compromised, and I wanted bad to leave
I'm not into male on male, it makes me want to heave

Could I have read the signs wrong, are you just being camp
Maybe your just friendly, and your don't want to clasp and clamp
Or stretch any of my sockets, or plug in your black lamp
It could be pretty dangerous, if your making dry things damp

The conversation took an unusual turn, I wish it was just babble
Mixing with the gay crowd, is not my kind of rabble
When I said "no" you then asked, "well surely don't you dabble"
I refuse to play your games, because your hardly into scrabble

I had to go once I knew, you was just a queer
You wanted to **** my ****, and take me up the rear
This is what I realised, so I left out of fear
Disappointed you may have been, but it's not the way I steer

You earned the name Black Dicky, it is just what you deserve
For you are so perverted, and By gum you've got a nerve
I am just a straight guy, I wont go the way you curve
The trouble is you try to persuade, the innocent to serve

I saw you some time later, in a toilet at the end
Peering over cubicles, but that's not the way I bend
Cottaging in public loos, well it is a gay mans trend
Walking out you even said, "I thought you was my friend"

Be careful in the White Lion Walk, the situation may turn sticky
A Black Man maybe waiting there, who isn't all that picky
Hanging around Saint Mary's church, he might try and grab a ******
Remember to tell this gentleman, "Please Go Away Black Dicky"

There are people in this world, and I don't mean to preach
I am exercising my rights, and my freedom of speech
Opinions will be expressed, but there's not much I can teach
Except these people drain the land, all ******* like a leach

If your a copper lover, and you like the boys in blue
Politics may float your boat, perhaps you don't have a clue
Royalists could take offence, you know what you should do
a WARNING from this moment on, I wouldn't read if I we're you

Just forget about crap brexit, it's the British who will pay
Who cares about a ******* deal, or if we go or stay
We never had no interest, with that ***** Theresa May
Her cabinet is full of ****, but they've always been that way

We don't need any governors, trying to take our land
Or politicians trying to rule, with their unruly hand
A state for every president, all thinking they are grand
And local law enforcement, I can not ******* stand

All people in authority, treat the rest of us like flops
The civil servants are not civil, nor are the ******* cops
Their issued with a uniform, and believe they are the tops
Illegal **** and seized drugs, are shared in bent cop shops

You could get a thrashing, locked behind that steel cell door
Or mowed down in a pursuit, or beaten to the floor
They get away with ******, and a hell of a lot more
In case you did not realise, Police have immunity from the law

Never mind Ladies and lords, in a world of pure desire
The deception of constabulary's, and the monarchy's a liar
They all adopt god statuses, it could be even higher
Escort them to the Wicker Man, sacrifice them in the fire

The Governments they ruin lives, their footsteps where dirt soils
Our leaders are unscrupulous, every country's left in spoils
Prime minister's winding up the world, in continuous loops and coils
The queen should go and **** herself, along with all the royals

A horses **** springs to mind, as well as ugly trolls
When I see that Prince Philip, and Camilla Parker Bowles
Charlie boy well what a ****, dragging Diana through the coals
Their the spongers of the state, all living of our tolls

Just take a look at palaces, and look at where we dwell
We're treated like we're second rate, and we all ****** smell
They stick their noses in the air, and you can always tell
That we're seen as the common folk, and we can go to hell

When seen in the public eye, you know they are looking down
They're no better then anyone else, underneath their royal gown
Why are they put on pedestals, and made jewels of the crown
And live in places that could house, half an ******* town

Who cares about false visits, who cares where they have been
Their only trying to look good, their not really all that keen
Flood victims and tsunamis, well they just want to be seen
We don't want the tossers sympathy, and ******* to the queen

Isn't she just too **** old, she should be abdicating
The rest of them can *******, their all so aggravating
Higher aches no one needs, because they are segregating
We're categorised into a class, and there is no negotiating

Disband the current monarchs, because they are out of season
The Tudors should've been the place, to put a royal freeze on
Why are they the privileged ones, there isn't a good reason
They are all above the law, and maybe that's high treason

All successors to the throne, they never had a spine
I'd rather be a *******, now the crown has lost it's shine
When there's marriage on the table, their not likely to decline
Has Meghan Markle ever been, The Bride of Frankenstein ?

I knew you were an actress, take a look at yourself now
You are like Kate Middleton, your just another royal sow
Is William a pig ******, he's reared three swine's but how?
Perhaps Harry's had a bit of  Kate, and bred that stupid cow

Because a prince just came along, and it was you they plucked
Was it the thought of royalty, when in you were then ******
Does aristocracy have its folds, are they all neatly tucked
The only job you have now, is lay down and get ******

Can I make one suggestion, now please don't take offence
You don't have to reproduce, with these two smarmy gents
Do you feel obligated, to mix in with their scents?
Or because you're now a royal, you have free tax and rents

Never mind the cushy jobs, when your in the special forces
Send William to the front line, after his training and courses
Why should our country pay, for all their false endorses
Is Margaret part of their clan, or one of the sad horses

The Duke of Edinburgh's award, why didn't he just pass
Sarah Ferguson was a commoner, and from a different class
Did Andrew like her freckles, did they extend down to her ***
She wasn't all that bothered, once behind the palace glass

Celebrities tolerate her majesty, they must have some endurance
Those poor ******* on that show, the Royal Variety Performance
Britain's Got Talent has it's winners, I hope they have insurance  
They're there for the prize money, not for the royals assurance

A variety of royalty, but there not all that enticing
So many bent police officers, who take small cuts from slicing
We don't want dodgy minister's, collecting and over pricing
It's a constabulary of governments with too much royal icing

A razor is my nemesis, because the blades do not behave
Gouging cuts into my skin, that is the path they pave
But it is unavoidable, I have become a bathroom slave
To rid myself of excess hair, from a shave that I don't crave

Ever since the birth of man, it goes back many years
A growth around your lip and chin, extending to your ears
It may go down particularly well, among the bents and queers !
I'd rather have a smoother face, to avoid Ducky's and Dears

Why do men want ****** hair, why do they want a beard
Bits of stubble sticking out, a design that's rough and weird
A Goatee isn't very good, it's cattle that's not reared
You wouldn't get tickled or scratched, if beards had not appeared

Okay some guys might look alright, when they are neat and trim
Scruffy ones they just look bad, and some are rather grim
I don't want hairs growing on my legs, or any other limb
Nice smooth skin is my preference, and it's not a passing whim

There is just one problem, something I would love to ditch
Hair removal is a pain, and it's an evolution glitch
When the morning comes along, I have that same old itch
Having to shave is immanent, and a *******

How many ****** shaves, does a man have to endure
Eventually your skin goes dry, from this old daily chore
You get cut far too often, I don't want it anymore
Razor blades no longer work, and that's a shaving flaw

Girls complain about their periods, it must be so frustrating
With all that blood just seeping out, when you are menstruating
You wouldn't like it daily, there is a period of waiting
It only happens once a month, so it's not as irritating

I'd rather shave twelve times a year, without anymore hair traces
No cuts and grazes for a month, in many different places
Unscrupulous razor companies, would have no more hairs and graces
Hairy smiles would be wiped off, from their stupid corporate faces

A close shave does not exist, I think it's a fare bet
That manufactures cut your throat, with electric dry and wet
All the claims of the best, that a man can get
Sharp shavers are a fabrication, and that includes Gillette

The cheaper brands are just as bad, shops own brand or BIC
You may as well tape a knife, to a piece of stick
Are potato peelers any sharper, would they be a valid pick
Would chipped skin be as bad, or just get on your wick

One shave is not sufficient, you have to do it twice
There's always bits left behind, which isn't very nice
I would've tried the No No, an expensive hair device
Razor blades and shavers, have such a high tagged price

It makes me cross and angry, because there is no reward
When buying beauty products, which they say you can afford
Why cant you have a body switch, or a desired level cord
So you can turn of your hair, and sod Wilkinson Sword

Excess hair I do not want, except for on my head
Is stress the cause of going thin, when it begins to shed
Would it not be better, coming of your face instead
Shaving would then be reduced, and not something to dread

Many men go through the curse, of losing it on top
The older that you become, your head hairs for the chop
A full crown is all I want, why take away my mop
I didn't want a bad harvest, by losing half my crop

The only place I wanted it, I've lost my style and flair
Why does a bald patch appear, why does your bonce go bare
Is it my comeuppance, with the creation of a glare
All I want from follicles, is my head full of hair

If you want to have a beard, then that is fare enough
Don't be mistaken for a *****, by looking like a scruff
I don't want a hairy face, or stubble that is rough
Or a weird beard with scraggy parts, or any yuk *** fluff

Some men just let beards grow, and maybe that's just crazy
It's not as though they look sweet, or as pretty as a daisy
Personal hygiene may not count, if they are always lazy
To me it isn't fashionable, it makes you look old and hazy

Who wants to be a yeti, but perhaps it is too late
And wild men roaming in the woods, is evolutions own cruel fate
No matter how much I shave, it's the scratchy bits I hate
Wasted shaves when hair returns, why does it lay in wait

How much has man evolved, how much as man progressed
Personally I think the state of hair, has radically regressed
It's based on my own experience, so perhaps I am obsessed ?
Who wants a hairy monkey, when your naked and undressed ?

There is a smooth advantage, when you are misbehaving
A kiss feels much more sensual, without the crazy paving
This is all that drives me, although it is enslaving
Even with the nice things, I'm not craving for a shaving

A wolf stands on the everglades, upon the jagged stone
Moonlight shines on flowered tracks, a grey and shadowed tone
Shivers of the full moon, why do I feel alone
The water falls inside my soul, and chills me to the bone

Streams reflect the mountain rock, the image from the ledge
Heartbeats pound into my chest, as I lay on the edge
Is the blood oath my only hope, is this my finale pledge
A glimmer through the old oak trees, past the trampled hedge

I am drawn towards the gorge, where old paths cross and wind
Running across the valley land, I leave the ponds behind
Is the wolf now following, or is this in my mind?
What's beyond those flowered tracks, what am I going to find?

A Raft floats in the harbour, a small child comes in sight
My mind is taken over, by the power of the night
Could my salvation be the blood, before the mornings light
Hunger will be satisfied, if a wolf's fang takes it's bite

Approaching the lake near the bay, a look into the Childs eyes
Am I compelled to cause harm, am I in a different guise
Songs are carried by the winds, when I hear those distant cries
What is down at Flowered Tracks, where the crooked beaked crow flies

A frightened girl is cowering, behind the damp hay stacks
On the prowl of claw and tooth, when the wolf attacks
Does a silver bullet count, what exactly are the facts
Fairy songs are Calling me, I must return to Flowered Tracks

Money makes the world go round, i think it's more complex
A mutual attraction plays a part, with people having ***
It's not really all that sordid, or a perverted mind
There wouldn't even be a world, without the bump and grind

Don't dismiss the theory, and be part of the gang
The Earth and all creation, was born from the big bang
If we didn't have the urges, then populations would diminish
Wouldn't people just die out, and that would be our finish

It's not so much a ***** world, that's filled with obscene words
Nature can be wonderful, if you embrace the bees and birds
Some people maybe reserved, but they still like feely plays
They'll fornicate and that is fine, in many different ways

Shamefulness is in the mind, but mainly in your thoughts
Even things deemed of disgust, like golden water sports
Attractiveness will always work, if the chemistry is right
Loosen up your prudish side, and never be too tight

Release your thoughts upon the world, it can be liberating
A closed mind needs opening, to stop it hibernating
In pursuit of money and wealth, is nothing too imperial
There are other riches to behold, that aren't so immaterial

Embrace your human instincts, you can stand up tall and proud
It's all to do with attitude, no matter quiet or loud
Repeal masses of pettiness, amend laws of your legislature
Indulge in all your fantasies, become one with Human Nature

Different words we will seek out, some are new and strange
The Enterprise has left dry dock, she's the only ship in range
We'll explore the distant galaxies, find other new life forms
There has been stars and nebulas, and hostile ion storms

The star ship Exeter has been found, orbiting Omega Four
Only uniforms remain, and the crew they are no more
They have suffered a disease, No one is left on board
We must beam down the landing party, lives we can't afford

Captain Ron Tracy has gone rouge, violating the Prime directive
While in pursuit of long life, this was his main objective
Crystal remains of the Exeter's crew, was it the planets evolution
The Omega Glory can be solved, with the American Constitution

If your not of the body, then brainwashing could turn sour
Mr Sulu is in paradise, just beware of the red hour
Hooded lawgivers are out there, for the bidding of Landru
Waiting for The Return Of The Archons, another Starfleet crew

Stella would chastise Harry Mudd, but he didn't get annoyed
Finally having the last word, with his special wife android
The arrogance of Harcourt Fenton Mudd, with a touch of eccentricity
Many androids created in I Mudd, a planet of multiplicity

Is Professor John Gill guilty, of a prime directive violation
Advanced technology has been used, to create a **** nation
The Planet Ekos is contaminated, evolutions set off course
Zeon pigs are off the street, to evade Patterns Of Force

Trelane wanted fun and games, It was time to make a stance
An ancient duelling pistol, may be Captain Kirk's one chance
Challenging The Squire Of Gothos, who is the sharpest shooter
War games against four federation ships, with The Ultimate Computer

The Mark Of Gideon was Kirk's blood, and Odona was infected
Kirok experienced The Paradise Syndrome, before the asteroid was deflected
In the body of Mr Spock, Henoch didn't have no sorrow
Will the essence of the captains mind, Return To Tomorrow

Plato's Stepchildren used telekinetic abilities, to force an interracial kiss
Zefram Cochrane's in love with The Companion, in Metamorphosis
We are stranded on a planet, something's threatening our lives
Body cells are being disrupted, so protect That Which Survives

A Requiem for Methuselah, Flint is part of ancient history
Miri is a young woman, the Grup's disease is now our mystery
Klingons in Errand Of Mercy, tried to take Organian's turf
A warhead in the past was detonated, in Assignment Earth

The Lights Of Zetar invaded the body, of Lieutenant Mira Romaine
Bread and Circuses gladiator sacrifices, a fight to the death again
Lost in the past will we get back, from All Our Yesterday's
Lazarus is positive and negative, The Alternative Factor's split two ways

Was the creature made of rock, we didn't know for certain
A fight with history's greatest foes, behind The Savage Curtain
Janice Lester captured Capitan Kirk, he could not elude her
She took over his body and ship, in Turnabout Intruder

An impostor is on board the ship, Kirk has been separated
Men have good and evil sides, but now there segregated
Does passive need aggressiveness, a malfunction caused their sever
Transporters need to be repaired, to splice Kirk back together

These are the voyages of the crew, of the enterprise
Many officers have died, and we've said our last goodbyes
Missions placed in the ships logs, along with crew memoirs
Our adventurers may continue, with our trek to unknown stars. . .

Wow what a night we have had, with your **** on show
I'm partial to your lovely cheeks, but that I think you know
It didn't really take too long, I'm glad we crossed that line
The bottom of the stairs is great, but anywhere is fine

You turned me on with your nice ***, there wasn't any Doubt
Such an exciting decision, when you got your great **** out
Leant on the stairs was lovely, I knew that we would jell
We got as far as the front door, before our clothing fell

Wow what a night we have had, I enjoyed squeezing your ****
I'm glad it is quite ample, and nice and big and sparse
It's good that we got naked, I hadn't been there long
To get undressed as soon as we can, is definitely not wrong

I loved the feeling that we had, it doesn't matter where
Whether it is on a bed, or bent down on a stair
We could try it in a field, or behind a wall
You can do anything you like, with no limits at all

Wow what a night we have had, with our inhibitions shed
It's just as good going upstairs, and continuing on the bed
We both got so excited, cos we knew what we would get
A different position felt so nice, when both of us got wet

What a lovely feeling, when our legs were in a tangle
When we layed down and our bodies, were at a different angle
I didn't really want to stop, because the feeling was amazing
We got so hot forget the heating, and the double glazing

Wow what a night we have had, and still it wasn't over
Your **** is just fantastic, you came like a super nova
We went downstairs for a while, and had a little rest
The sofa was the next place, where we did what we do best

I love to feel your moisture, I fingered you until you came
You were even wetter, and I know that I'm to blame
But I wanted your body, and I just can't get enough
Biting and scratching I don't mind, or being a bit rough

Wow what a night we have had, it is such a fantasy
If I had the choice it's where, I would like to be
It was so enjoyable, and I would do it all again
My mind is always thinking, of what night and where or when

I know it can be slippy, and it can be quite surprising
Especially when it's very damp, because we have been moisturising
Five times is achievable, your glistening body's a nice sight
A Pity it had to finish, but boy Wow What A Night