I’m not writing the dreams down anymore
I don’t feel the need to, not since you’re with her
The dreams no longer reflect anything important to me
They are only dreams, things that I wish would happen
Things I wish you would say to me
I do not keep track of them anymore
I hardly keep track of you
I love you, but I can’t sit here and watch you ruin your life
Watching you ruin your life ruins my life
I have a life to live, I want to go live it
And I will
While you stay here in Seattle wallowing
I will be traveling the world at the top of my game
I will live our dream for you

The girl dancing on top of the table thinks she’s the hottest girl in the room
But in the end she’s the only one standing alone
I don’t want to stand alone
I don’t want to dance on top of the table by myself
I want to feel like the prettiest girl in the room when I stand next to you
I want your blue eyes to look at me like you’ve just met me
Like its love at first sight and you can’t live without me
Because I don’t want to live without you
I can barely breathe without you
It’s been a year and a half of torment without you
Just when I feel like I can breathe again
My heart stops

I need a winner
I have a big string of losses and I need a win
I thought you were my winner
You were the one person I didn’t have to worry about
I lost you anyway
I lost my dreams and inspiration

TV makes this city look so much more glamorous than it is
Makes Seattle look pretty and nice
This city is not pretty and nice
The people are not pretty and nice
TV lies, dreams lie, people lie
For a while, my life was one big lie

I will not miss this city when I leave
I may see it on TV and remember it
But I will not miss it
I will not miss the lies that were told to me
I will not miss the lie that I lived
I have regained my strength and inspiration
And an looking forward to the string of wins

I’ve been so consumed in my pain
I didn’t even notice the leaves had changed
Looked out my window to find the leaves yellow and orange
In the blink of an eye spring turned to fall
It’s time for a new season

I was just a pawn in your passion play
I was your lesson to learn
And now I am left with nothing
My heart broke in three places when you left

I ***** for a bottle of shattered dreams
I reach for my head which is filled with outrage
This poor body screams in agony
Broken and ill
I hope she leaves you empty handed just as you left me

I feel like my life is an open book all of a sudden
Everyone knows who I am, what I am
Where I’m going and who I’m going with
This city is too small to hide in
And it makes me want to *****
Makes me want to cry, scream, throw things against the wall
But I know I have to be strong for everyone else
I feel like I can’t let anyone down
I can’t show my weaknesses
Not now, not yet
I’m not ready for that

I’ve exposed too much as it is
I’ve allowed people to know too much
I trust that they won’t exploit me
But I do not trust myself

God help me!
I need your guidance; I need your strength to be who you created me to be
I need your love and happiness to keep me going
I see my world being turned upside down!
Everything is changing so quickly!
So rapid and so unfair
I need to breathe, I need a break, I need escape
Bring me peace and confidence
Bring back the joy that once filled this empty heart

I’m feeling very distressed and confused
I don’t recognize these feelings and I don’t know what to do with them
All I know to do is write it down
No one has been able to make me feel better
And everyone tells me to walk away
I don’t like these feelings, I don’t like where they’re going
All I want is support and happiness
None of which is being given to me
The one person I need to contact is out of reach
I am a mess and I have to work through it on my own
I’ve pushed everyone away because I’ve been let down
It’s been a tough recovery, and I am going crazy
I need something good to happen
I need some good news
I need a good reason to let go and leave it behind
That reason has not revealed itself to me yet
I wish I could let it go, I wish I could let Alex go
I don’t know how to let him go
I’ve tried, again and again I’ve tried
I don’t know why I keep hanging on
I guess it’s because I have never known that kind of love before
And when it’s the love you’ve been asking for all your life
It’s not easy to walk away from
I wish I could take my friends advice and just walk away
I am not angry with him, so I don’t have a reason to walk away
He is not dating anyone, so I have no reason to walk away
I can love again, but it won’t be as awesome as that
I am not afraid to love again, I just know it won’t come anywhere near as awesome
They say we only get one perfect love, I lost mine
My perfect love was taken away from me
And now I am expected to just walk away
Your perfect love is the hardest thing to walk away from