I just laughed at myself so bad, my stomach hurt.

Not because of the humane chicken thing....just wanna clarify.

What's the point of ***** hair
It seems to make no sense
Unless you wanted to give us a thing
To hold onto our sweaty scents
And now that I mention it
Armpit hair, too
What's the deal, dear Sir?
I think that we could do without
All this inconvenient fur

He's working his way into the rhythm of my life
In that I expect him there.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Jumping on the bandwagon
Why don't you come too?

You say you've got a broken heart
But yet, it still beats true
You suffer from a damaged heart
Because NOBODY breaks You!

Shut
Ads
****
****
Per
****
Birch
****
Sick
****
(Wow...it lets me do **** and ****!)

I been seeing lots of  poets
Walking through strawberry fields.  
Well....we already been there and done that
Take us somewhere new.

Being human means viewing the way we all knowingly treat chickens and hens as "humane"

Everyone told you he was a bad guy
And of course, why would they lie
Keep your distance, they all say
But you will not go down that way
You're too good, at the very least
You can tame that wild beast
But wild beasts are not for taming
And anonymous horses are not for naming
He left you less than what he found
Dug your ego into the ground
He did this to the next girl, too
And never, ever thinks about you
Still, you're stuck right on rewind
Until your heart, you can re-find
Come on, girl, please move past
Heart breaks are too sad to last
Next time everyone warns you away
Promise you'll refuse to stay

Get over ya bad self
I knew you'd be a zing bat
I saw you
In a t-shirt that said M-I-L-F.

That accidental fit of genius
That took me ten minutes to
Notice
Otherwise known as
Dumb Luck

I know you wish you didn't say it
You know I wish that, too
But Time is a relentless
Warrior
He'll never turn back for you

I'm pretty sure
Though may be wrong
But I'll give it a whirl
I really doubt there's such a thing
As a "high class" call girl

I've sung so many happy songs
And danced barefoot upon the grass
I've washed hundreds of dishes, and cleaned up this mess
And not one woodland creature has made me my dress!

As a young girl
I HATED that I had little *******
I feel you
You young
Little ***** girls
It *****
Being little tittied
Until you hit about 35
And realize how blessed you are
With those perky
Little *******

"The blind must believe in the absence of sight."
-David O'Reilly

I don't employ the thesaurus
To write my poetry
False airs are not invisible
It's not snooty words we seek
We want to feel the boiling of your blood
The heartsongs of your childhood
Loves you've lost
Loves you gained
Mistakes you'd never make again
Who took your virginity
And why'd you made that choice
What you someday hope to be
Sweetheart, use that vòice!
Be you, with words you know and use
What have you got to lose?

Ahhh
He wants me to be impressed
He's gonna have to put in work
On what may be a futile mission
He might have to settle for flattered

Yep
I'm the ******* who accidentally
Gives the two year old
A blazing hot
Cheeto
(But at least I'm not the ******* who purposefully makes blazing hot Cheetos)

How many times
Will you blame your lover
For breaking your heart
Before you realize
You're the Bozo who keeps Handing your heart over to
Heart-breakers

I'm the curious wanderer
Your mom warned you about
I'd love to stay here with you
But I've got new trails to scout
I could promise you the world
And to love you with all my might
But I'm afraid I must admit
Your mama was probably right

My sugar daddy turned out to be salt
I could blame him, but it's my own **** fault
I should have known enough to see
There's no such thing as a sugar daddy
There's only creepy guys
Who think that they can buy their lies

I can tell you can't get enough of me
Such sincere and sweet flattery
I wish so bad you did it for me
But I think of you in only friendly
I did nothing wrong, but feel so sorry
Please hurry up and get over me

Let go of that *******
Who didn't love you back
Let go of that selfish *****
Who stabbed you in the back
Let go of those stupid kids
Who teased and taunted you
Let go of that pig face girl
Who picks on everything you do
Let go of that boy
Who lied and broke your heart
If you carry everyone who hurt you around
You're gonna need a bigger cart.

You lost me at "cacophony."

I'm the poet with teribel gramar
And I cannot spel
I set a long this careir path
But it hasnt gone sew well

You're so ******* yourself
Don't give yourself an inch
Punch yourself in the eye
When you deserve a pinch
Can't you see how awesome you Are?
Well, I sure do
I think it's time you realize
There's so much right with you
(You know who you are)

Cleavage stands in for a pretty face
A nice *** hides a terrible heart
We're so odd, this human race
Our bodies are fraudulent art

Notice me!
See how brilliant I am!
What is wrong with your eyes?
If you can't see my greatness
They're surely telling you lies

She was clearly the outcast
In her sorry, backwards town
Any time she got up
They would try to bring her down
People always throwing rocks
And giving her a hassle
They figured out too late
She used stone to build her castle

My mother was a horrible person
And an even worse parent
She loved to call me a "****"
When I was about ten
Her favorite move
Was picking me up
By my hair
And throwing me against the wall
Maybe because I didn't finish my chores
Maybe because she was in a **** mood
She abused her boyfriends
Too
Yes...it does happen that men are abused by their women
I have seen.it
I watched her throw a *** of boiling water
On a man named Dan
Who was really nice to us
She would do things like that
And men like Dan would pack their clothes
But before they could leave
Mom would attempt suicide
My mother attempted suicide
A lot
This is my experience with suicide
My mother is dead today
****** overdose
I suppose she finally
Succeeded.
This is my experience
With suicide

You took up two spaces
With your motorcycle
Clearly on purpose
Maybe in your next life
You can come back as someone
Who is not a selfish *****

I gave him a pile of crap
About how he was all wrong
We went back and forth
And then he wrote me a love song

Who else but a poet
Can use words like "behold" or "doth"
Without standing on a stage
Acting out a Shakespeare play?

Do you know I think about you
When you're not around
Do you know that you're a king
You should be wearing a crown
Do you know your hearty soul
Is stew that feeds my heart
Do you know I picture you
In Yellow Submarine art

Is there a more redundant word
That I use so much
How absurd
Clearly ridiculous

Oh you snooty, snooty man
Thinking you're so better than
Apparently the point you miss
If I didn't say, I'd be remiss
Thinking you're better than another
Proves you're just like any other

Good people probably wish they were bad sometimes

I'm always comin' around to you
That thing that only you can do

So Far
But the guy I fall in love with is going to be made from pieces of you.

Its so weird...
"She fell head over heels" in love.  We're all almost always head over heels!

I'm sorry, miss
We have to revoke your hashtag license
You put the tag of "****** abuse"
On a poem about breastfeeding.

He went in to the plastic surgeon
With a strange request
The surgeon agreed, though
This would be his biggest test
It had never been done
But the man was quite down-hearted
He really, really wanted
To get that finger enlargement

We all have that one dream we can't admit to our friends.

He's got a bunch of other  interests
He keeps on the side
But according to her logic
He cares, because he lied
If he didn't love her
He'd shove it in her face
And she's just so **** happy
She's "winning" in first place

I've decided I want to be a huwoman being.  This is my identity.

Nobody has ever died of broken heart
That was not done by their own hand
Broken hearts are not terminal
But they can convince you that they are
Broken hearts are cured by time
Or by being blown off course

In my witchy mind
I believe in the power of thought
When I'm thinking of someone
The thread between us connects
And they begin thinking of me
Well boy, you must be tripping over string

I can't tell if you're whiney
Or *****
You seem real confused
You flirt so suggestive
And brazenly, too
And when it's all over
You claim he used you
And he's gifted a guilt trip
Because you broke your rules

It's beautiful, really
The intricate, tiny bright-blue lighted pattern
Wee a-splatter
Sneezing on my phone

I am offended at how often you take offense
To the truth told to you without stroking your hair
And offering an apology
I find it offensive that you get so upset with me
Any time I tell you I disagree
The state of offense you're in constantly
Is not offensive to only me
None of us want to walk always on eggshells
I think you should be offended
With your own **** self