I was A                                                              ­                I was thE
                                                           ­                                   Second woman
                                                           ­                                  Into this Vaulted
                                                       ­                                       Dome of what
                                                            ­                                  We call Earth.
Goddess raining
From above.

I had The
Power of a
       THousand men

               I was known for my
   purEness
      ANd for my latching onto
      wAr.

I can't help                                                     I don't undeRstand
                                                    ­                                 Why It's me
                                                                ­      Who gets' stuCk
                                                         ­                           With Him.

                                                                ­                     But here I
                                                                ­                              Am. With one
                                                                ­                     Of the best
                                                            ­                          KilleRs in History.
                                                        ­                                 To Date.
But blame myself
For what happeneD.

Even though i'm
Not that person
                          AnYmore.

I don't care
If what happened,
Happened over 16
Years ago.

I may not
                 PhysicaLly be that
Person anymore but
                         I cAn't help
        But be him iNside.

Many people ask me why I don't want to get into a relationship, or why I don't have a boyfriend. This is why.
I have Depression.
I'm Suicidal.
I'm Bipolar.
I have OCD.
I have PTSD.
I'm abusive as a way to get back at the people who abused me.
I don't accept myself, the way I should.
I am ****** up beyond repair and belief.
I cut.
I dump all of my  problems onto people and expect them to treat me the way I want to be.
I am judgmental.
I can not take no for an answer, but when I do I get pissy.
I don't like being insulted, but I love insulting people.
I hate attitude, but I will give it in a heartbeat.
I expect to much out of people that I know are only temporary.
I share my opinions WAY to much.
And you know, guys can't handle it.

your name is everywhere and i ******* hate it.
i hate you.
i hate what you've done to me.
you convinced me you loved me,
and then you left.
and i see you everywhere now,
and every time i think of you,
suicide comes into mind.
are you proud of what you've done?