i am so sorry that everything i do is wrong and every time i apologize, i do it again. i am so sorry that i have never had someone stay as long as you, so i constantly wait for you to leave. i am so sorry that i push you away every day and all i really want is you to be here. i am so sorry that every time we talk, i cry and every time we are together, i bring up the past. i am so sorry that everything i have every done has stuck to me. i am so sorry that you can physically see the pain that i have gone through. i am so sorry that i didn’t answer your calls when you left or when i said i never cared. i cared more than anything. i am so sorry that i was never strong enough for you and i never will be. i am so sorry that you love me.

i am so so sorry.

Sometimes i imagine our hands touching in between the sheets, bringing back every late night memory of you holding me.

But then i wake up, and i remind myself that i'll never see my reflection in your eyes again.

empty bottles and they smell like you

i hated you for loving me because it only reminded me of how many people i've been destroyed by

emotions can overwhelm an individual until their own minds are lost

drowning in my own thoughts. fighting my own mind to understand.

hold me until every tree loses it's leaves
and every harsh winter comes to an end

broken mirrors and they still look like you

i am so sorry i am not strong enough for you

dead flowers and they smell like you

i fell in love when i realized that i was staring at you
rather than the sunset when i whispered it was beautiful

i miss the way your lips made my body still

i stopped peeking my head around the corner to check the time when you no longer told me how much i meant to you

do you ever crave someone's presence?

how can you make me feel both empty and alive

the shower is her safe place.

although alone, she feels surrounded by thoughts.

through the sound of the running water, listen to her muffled screams.

watch as her tears flow down her beautiful face,

only to blend in.

ki

just remember what my fingers felt like on your skin
when you look at her

the sad thing is, i try to fix people when i can't fix myself.

my mind can't wrap around the fact that you aren't here anymore

i prayed for the first time in awhile yesterday.

i prayed to God that He would take away my sadness and sorrow and give me something to smile about rather than to cry. i begged Him to show me my way; to help.

i cried again today, but this time i cried out of happiness.
my heart finally doesn’t hurt.

i prayed for Him to let me be happy and now i am.

The butterflies you once gave me are turning to stones, and im not sure what is worse; loving someone who doesn't love you or not being loved.

the unspoken pain streams down her face in the most beautiful way

your voice makes every lost feeling
find a place

i’m starting to love my body the way you used to tell me to

you never asked me how i was so i think that's why i never told you how i felt

The winds remind me how cold I've been without you

Sometimes I think that maybe the night winds really do whisper your name

he held his eyes open during the night to listen to each word she could possibly say

he awoke early to hear her voice before another person had the chance

he did all things in his power to retain her happiness

and she over looked it

now he can go hours without speaking

while she can weep for days

. . .

i’ve never heard your voice, yet i can tell you anything.

ki

she walks through the halls with a smile

she even speaks with ease

but her remains still shake at the sound of your name

she tries to ease her mind of your memories with showers
but the water always runs cold before she's finished crying

the air appears thick with each step forward.
her hands are damp with the memories her mind evokes her body of.
the atmosphere becomes dark from the tears flooding her soul.
her eyes grow still with the dreams her core possesses.

“nevertheless; you are bound to regain strength”

oh, her lovely face began to share a beautiful, counterfeit grin with each creature onward,
only permitting individuals to notice her pleased.

let me be your last phone call before you leave
let me be that last memory

i will never forget how you held my hips
like it was the first time seeing me in years

falling in love is like learning how to swim for the first time and not knowing when you would finally drown

i have forgotten how to be happy

I’m done;
With life.
With everything.
And I’m stuck.
Feeling everything

hurting today from the pain caused yesterday

i wish you could catch a glimpse of your beauty that i strive to stare at each day

i miss you.

these words roll off my tongue like the wind whispers in the winter night. these words would be the last breath that i allowed my empty soul to take in. these words feel the old presence of your fingers next to mine. these few words bring back the memories of lovely nights that can never be forgotten. these words run through the walls of every room i enter to only come back to my body to realize you aren’t returning.

i miss you.

these everlasting words of hope engage my body in the wants of us being together. these words only give me the idea of what could have been that we will never know. these empty words have been spoken so often from my dry mouth that they have lost forever meaning. these words are wonderful yet they have been given such a dark feeling. the idea of enjoying an individuals life so much that you greatly miss them is such a compliment yet so many people look at these words with no hope in ever seeing them again.

miss them so you can see them again

do not allow yourself to miss them because you have lost interest in pursuing

I can’t describe the pain I feel

So I write it down for all to hear

And I can’t help but admit it’s true

That I’m losing my mind over you

How is it that your lips can whisper such beautiful things that only sound like screams in the air