My heart stills hurts
I can pretend all I want
But it still
hurts

I heard that if you go into complete darkness you will illuminate the light

The light goes out and my room speaks

Some times I keep my light on

Some people's deep
Goes far beyond
the
grave

How do we live without making mistakes
Can we?

Subconscious layers built from youth
The child never formed the bond with the world
Though tried as they grew
The observations were enough to get through
Though they wanted more
Conversations to pour into
To find out there's always something you never knew or do as should be done
The eyes are correct to another
Speech was just a way to criticize
Feelings out of place
Misaligned
Rode with the starving mind
To find the thirsty kind
Longing to sip
Struggle to give
Filling the holes into myself
Spaces inside to live

The silence has always been welcome

To see the world as yourself is not always a view to cherish
You can't always force yourself to see the beauty
When the inside screams
It paints the screen
You just want it to fade away

I've been sitting
with
My fears
My shadows
My insecurities
My projections
My demons
My anxiety
My feelings of shame
My thoughts of guilt and blame
My worries
My mortality
My unworthy causality
My judgement
My vulnerability
My mistrust

And here we sit
Upon the carpet