I guess it's always been like that
You cry, I laugh
But tonight I hated your face

You tried to hold back the tears when you saw it
It was just one of my many scars
I started laughing

You still don't know about the rest
Or why they are on my body
Only I know that

Such a beautiful girl
With tears that runs down her pretty face
The ice blue eyes look so much colder
But yet so much more alive

And I'm responsible
An ugly face
With an even uglier smile
And a hideous laugh

You asked me why
I didn't really have an answer you'd understand
You said 'you're ruining your body'
Once again I started laughing
Feeling the tears from my own eyes creep closer

It's kind of ironic
You don't want me to ruin my body
Oh but darling it's already so broken
I'm just trying to build it up again
In a way that you would never understand

I'm sorry that you saw it
I don't want you to think that
I'm asking for help
Or that I'm weak
I'm sorry in a way that you will never understand

If I had the world and time,
ample wine and leisure,
then I might be well content
to give myself to pleasure.
Oh what fun indolence is
with all the world my treasure.
But infinity is not the cloth
of which I'm cut and measured.
The Fates that cut say time is short,
I cannot bide forever.
I preserve my time
in bits of rhyme
so posterity thinks me clever.
A prophet in his own home town
appreciated never.

The meadow is green and goes for miles
The river sparkles under the sunlight
All the forests are enchanted
And all the creatures are at peace
Welcome to my world

The thoughts swirl and twist
Everything moves quickly
Like rapid little rodents
Trying to save their own hides
Welcome to my mind

This place is dark but hopeful
This place is wild but tame
This place is horrid but beautiful
This place is paradoxical, but it is exactly what it seems
Welcome to my soul

Full of love and hope
Trying to reach out and share it with others
Trying to find the place where it truly belongs
Trying to find its other half
Welcome to my heart

Welcome to my world

Who am I?
Who stands in solitude waiting for the passing of sorrow in a vortex of chaos?
What are these feelings?
That drown out the echo of what once was love, and intensifies an obsession that is not healthy for the mind?
Is there hope?
That should bring forth the darkness within, purifying the heart that once beat your voice?
Why am I sad when I'm near you?

I open my arms to express words that pain my throat.
Swallow the smoke from a cigarette I promised I'd never smoke.
I sink deeper into the darkness;
My soul looks for ascension and purification,
I wonder why we can't become one?

In the morning my eyes open and tears rush out.
It felt like I'd realized the meaning.
Only to once again be surrounded by darkness and deceit.
Is suicide the proof of life?

I hold out my arms to pick up the fragile glass of a broken heart.
Please, give me something that causes pain; something sharp enough to stab a heart.
Your tears won't compensate.
How do we prove our living?

The values of morality begin to look cruel.
I'll sit and embrace the surrounding darkness.
This is a nightmare that won't pass.

I'll set the conditions of my life tomorrow,
I'll take it day by day to find the proof.
Erasing your memory won't change you.
Do you think it will make everything go away?
It's not avoidance, it's cowardice.

I'll tattoo the numbers in my face and seal my fate.
After all, it's everyone's best intention.
Still, there is darkness.