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Nov 2013 · 264
Everything
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
I think back on everything,
how amazing it was.

How amazing it still is.

I don't want to lose you

I'm gonna make you realize how much I care.
I want to make you understand so badly.

*I love you
Nov 2013 · 308
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
I hope you know you're my world,
and everything in it.

I am sorry I am acting crazy,
I'm sorry for the repetition.

This is where my feelings can be written,
expressed.

*Oh darling I wish you were here
Nov 2013 · 935
Vanilla Twilight
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
The stars lean down to kiss you
And I lie awake and miss you
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere
'Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly
But I'll miss your arms around me
I'd send a postcard to you, dear
'Cause I wish you were here
Nov 2013 · 225
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
I have prayed for someone like you*

God I don't want to hurt anymore,
please.
I've prayed to You,
help me.
Nov 2013 · 1.4k
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
I look back on all my old poems
Wow

This is love.
I feel resurgence in myself.
All these old gears are turning again.

You have to take time to sit down,
and just shut up for a minute.

Remember, please remember

Our first time meeting.
I was so nervous,
but I was so calm around you.
He's different

Our first date
How can this many embarrassing things happen in one day
He definitely saw my ****.
Accident.

Our first kiss
Just like in the movies
One swift motion,
And I was there.

Remember
*Please
Nov 2013 · 240
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
It's hard to keep myself together.
I'm not as tough as you think.
I have a heart.
I can't look,
it hurts too much.

Do you know how frustrating it is.
Come home,
just come back home.
I can't live like this.
This is unbearable.

Silence

Still nothing.



Nothing.

*Okay
Nov 2013 · 374
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
Who's going to stay here forever?
You are.
Who's going to love you forever?
You are.
Who is going to buy you a diamond ring?

It's the voices again,
they're back in my head.
They keep replaying scenes from the past.
A nosebleed.
Toby really?
I still remember it all,
like it was yesterday.

Where are you?
I'm here,
in my own little corner.

I'll never leave you*
I know you won't baby,
I know.
Nov 2013 · 1.2k
Broken Girl
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
They took everything from her.
They.
Whatever those things are don't deserve names.
Not for what they did.
Just pretend you're somewhere else
You never realize what's happened
until after he's done.

You put a pillow over your own face because you're embarrassed the first time,
but you get used to it.
He's charming and always has the right thing to say.
It's fun dancing out in the night,
breaking the rules and not caring about anything.
The window opens and closes.
Heavy breaths in the middle of the night.
Just hoping your parents don't walk in.
What? You'll like it.

His friend thinks it'd be good to get back at him.
Yeah it'll be fun.
Curbside fun.
No cars drive by.
God please someone drive by.
I'm not done yet keep going.
He thought it was such a big joke.

Wow what a sweet car.
Meaningless texts,
turning into meaningless drives.
It's okay, no one will see.
I know a place we can go.
This doesn't feel right.
It happens again,
and again.

You're such a ****, I know what you did.
How could you do this?

So you like theatre huh?
Wow that was such a good monologue.
He's like Romeo, and I Juliet.
Turn your face away from the garish light of day
Oh he's so romantic.
How'd I get to this place.
I can do this, I can handle myself.
Caressing and kissing.
God please don't leave me with him
I think I'm going to be sick.
It keeps on going,
does this ever stop?
It's so dark, I don't want to see his face.
Are you sure you want to do this?
No.
NO.
I don't want to do this get off me!

Yeah I'm kind of a big deal.
Wow he's cuter in person.
Why don't we hang out?
Oh my god yes.
The window opens and closes.
Not in my bed,
please no.
Of course.

No not you again.
He's still charming
He is drunk this time.
He always is now.
God I hate the smell of smoke.
Am I the only sober person here?
Frost, you know I love you right?
No.
No you don't.
You don't know a **** thing about me.
And you never will.

Country boy country wide.
Get in that big ole truck girl.
Riding in the moonlight.
Wow there's a lot more space back here than it looks.

You did what?!

Yeah I put in notches for every girl I bring back here

I am not just a notch.
I am a person
I am sick of being touched and grabbed.
Somebody just listen to me.

MONTHS LATER

No I don't want to go out,
I don't feel like it.
But I love Braums.
Standing impatiently in line waiting.
Waiting,
wait.
Who is he?
I can't look away.
I feel the magnetic pull towards him.
God he's perfect.
Hey can you give him my number?
11:00pm
Purple Hat.
Starbucks?
Oh I don't know.
What if he's like them
No, he's different.
Yeah sure I'll meet you there.
Four hours later.
A familiar warm embrace.
Well it was nice meeting you
Yeah you too.


I think you're my knight in shining armor
I'm saved.
Nov 2013 · 263
Don't Walk
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
I just want to be able to feel again.
I am numb.

My heart is ripped out from my chest.

Is it really over?
It can't be.
I'm sorry.
I am so sorry.

Is there someone else?
I hope not,
Because that's the worst thing to picture.
I don't see anyone else by your side.

It's best not to think about that.
We need a break.

I don't give up that easily.



*I want you forever, you and me, everyday.
Nov 2013 · 237
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
My Cinderella story is almost over.
The clock will strike midnight,
And he'll be gone.

I kept waiting for him,
But he never came.
My heart aches.

The night is coming to a close,
And all I want is him.
Nov 2013 · 272
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
Dark thoughts surround me.
I see them.
All of them.
I never realized how many there was.
They have devilish grins on their faces.
I felt like something inside me was missing.
Each of them had something in their claws.

They each had a little piece of me,
That I didn't even know was gone.
They controlled me with it.
They all just sat there laughing at me.
Just laughing.
I tried to run.

I ran as far away as I could.
But they still found me.
How do they find me?
They always do.
They'll always be there in the back of my mind.
I see them everywhere I go.
Each with a different excuse,
Each with a different pick up line.
All waiting to get a little piece of me.
Nov 2013 · 338
hello darkness
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
I see you at the door with flowers.
A big grin on your face.
"I'm sorry".
"I'm sorry too ***."
I'm wrapped in your warm embrace.
I feel your heart beating,
And your sweaty palms.
I smell you again.
I'm at peace

I wake up.

The room is dark and cold,
And the wind howls against
The window.
I'm utterly alone.
Shadows of my past dance wildly.
The candle flame gently waves.
The space next to me is vacant and cold.

I dream and dream and dream.
Nov 2013 · 249
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
I sit at the door waiting.
I watch the leaves blow by.
It already feels like an eternity.
As it blows by.
I'm waiting for you,
But you aren't coming.
Where are you?
Are you thinking of me too?
I wish I was a leaf.
Nothing to worry about,
Nothing to do.
I would just tumble and spin
In the wind.
I'm falling
With nothing to catch me.
I'm waiting,
And waiting.
Won't you save me?
Nov 2013 · 215
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
My thoughts are loud when I'm alone
I have to put my head under a pillow to silence them.
That usually won't work.
Sometimes I ask myself if this life is worth living
because it is.
Isn't it?
I want to scream out to the world and let them know it.
Nov 2013 · 367
Gone, Gone, Gone
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
I am at the end of a paved road.
Your taillights are getting dimmer and dimmer.
It is quiet in the world,
like my thoughts.
Am I too shocked or too confused.
Both I think.
I am in denial.
I walk aimlessly.
Who knows where I am going,
I don't really care where.
The world just lost its color-
everything seems gray.
Nov 2013 · 189
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
Is this what it feels like?
I've never felt this way.
I've never cared when it happens.
But now I do.
It feels like there's a hole in my body.
Not in my heart.
Not in my mind.
In my soul.
I just feel like part of me is empty,
like it always has been.
A vacant place inside.
Nothing to cover it up.
I think I tried to,
but you looked behind the curtain.
And saw it empty.
Just empty.
Nov 2013 · 197
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2013
There's water rushing in
And,I'm the only one who can feel it.
It's filling up my lungs.
I look at the people around me,
I try to scream.
But they can't hear me.
I'm drowning.
Mar 2013 · 345
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Mar 2013
I am an animal.
Scared, cold, and shuttering.
A cage encloses me with steel grips.

My master is good to me, and thoughtful.
He brings me food and water to keep me healthy.
I look behind him to the open gate.
A glimmer of light shines.
He returns my hopeful glance with his cold glare.
My cage is closed and locked tight.

I am free to escape him,
but I can't.
Part of me doesn't want to.
I love my master still.
The cold air whips my body as I lay and wait.
And wait,
and wait.
Jan 2013 · 296
what's wrong with me
Kaitlin Frost Jan 2013
I know I can be not all there sometimes,
I know.

Sometimes I like being alone,
I know.

Sometimes I don't treat you with the respect that you deserve,
I know.

But this is what you'll have to deal with.
You can take it or leave it.
Sometimes I think I am just terrible to you.
I treat you like dirt.
I am just used to it ending by now.
I'm sorry.
Dec 2012 · 258
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Dec 2012
Sometimes I wish I didn't exist.
That I could just forget it all.
The way he said it.
The way my skin cringed.
The way I was left.
No more of that.
Lets forget it all.
But I can't help it.
It comes creeping into my mind.
Your touch turns into his.
Your voice is his.
Everything is changing back to that night.
Again and again.
Dec 2012 · 550
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Dec 2012
You can't do this.
It will make me that way.
This is who I really am.
Selfish and conceited.
Just like momma always said.
You can't give me everything
And expect me to be humble.
I want everything.
I want to spend all my money on clothes
That are expensive because of brands.
I want.
I want.
I want.
See I am actually a spoiled little brat.
I don't care about anyone else but me.
I don't care what anyone else has to say
Unless it's about me.
I want the lead in the play.
I want to be 1st.
I want a $400 dress.
I want a lot.
Dec 2012 · 345
The Gift
Kaitlin Frost Dec 2012
Waking up to the crackle of fire,
Smelling the winter air.
Christmas morning arrives.
Presents are passed,
From one to the other.
Movies, candy, makeup.
Now under the tree is bare,
With cold blank tile.
Where is he?
Where's the gift to make me warm?
Where's the gift to make me smile?
Where's the gift to hold me?
To tell me everything is okay?
To make me laugh?
To make me feel whole again.
Where is he?
Kaitlin Frost Dec 2012
Sometimes it gets repetitive the way I talk about love,
But I really just love these things about you.
And I know I am not old enough to know what love is.
And I know I don't have much experience in life or at least what I think love is.
And I know I can be annoying and get jealous really easily when I am with you.
I know these things.
Everyday I wake up and think to myself,
"Why is he even with me? How do I deserve him?"
And whenever you look at me that way you always
Do, and you smile so warmly at me.
I know everything will be okay when you do.
And I'm not lying when I say I've never felt this way.
I close my eyes really tight sometimes,
And then open them back up to make sure I'm not dreaming.
I still feel like I am, and like everything goes by really fast.
I just sit here and think to myself,
I know I don't know what these things are,
But I do when I'm with you.
Dec 2012 · 384
Love Like Crazy
Kaitlin Frost Dec 2012
I wish I was with you now.
Wrapped in your warm embrace.
I feel a lot safer there than anywhere else
In the world.
I love you to the moon and back.
They call me crazy because I say I'm in
Love.
I am warm inside and smile bright.
I love the way you love me.
I love the way you can make me laugh.
I love the way you kiss me.
I love the way you look when you talk to me.
I love everything.
Dec 2012 · 730
Soldier's Wife
Kaitlin Frost Dec 2012
She sat at the dining room table,
reading the headlines of the news.
Wondering and wondering,
where was he tonight.
Peering out of the window,
into the darkness of night.
The moon fading in and out of the overcast,
was he seeing the same moon tonight?
No sounds were heard in the house,
except her breathing.
Everything was just quiet.
Emptiness.
Most of the days she spent waiting,
and waiting for him.
Six months gone by,
nothing yet.
Another six gone by,
as December rolls in.
She hangs the ornaments by herself that year.
The phone rings only has to ring twice,
until she answers.
"Baby, I'm coming home."
Dec 2012 · 545
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Dec 2012
I'm not used to all of this,
But in a good way.

Pathetic, yes,
But it's different.
I'm not scared anymore.
Being left after everything,
It messes you up.
Don't leave me now,
I can't handle it.
My heart is the clock within my chest,
Counting out the minutes until you're here
Again.
"Who's going to stay here forever?"
"You are."
"Who's going to love you forever?"
"You are."
"Who is going to buy you a diamond ring?"

I'm not used to all of this,
But in a good way.
Dec 2012 · 393
The Meaning
Kaitlin Frost Dec 2012
Everyday we have a certain routine to take:
Get up, get dressed, wash your face, make breakfast,
Not in that particular order.
You go to your job.
Or you go to school.
Or you stay at home.
You do something.
You do this every single day of your life.
Your life.
It's your life,
So go live it.
There is so much more to this.
There is more people to meet,
Sights to see,
Movies to watch,
More life to live.
Dec 2012 · 463
perfection perfected
Kaitlin Frost Dec 2012
Life is good.
Life is cozy.
Life is perfect.
Life is all about you.
Making me smile,
And laugh,
And just letting me be me.
Life is perfect.
Nov 2012 · 873
The Dream: An Ode to Poe
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2012
Now once upon a midnight dreary
A young fellow once did ponder weak and weary
Not like anything one has heard before,
But this time is was something more.
As he slumped in evening chair,
Ah too much to have care.
The world around him caved in and saw,
His duties were beckoning him with their claw.
Arose from the chair pondering and pondering,
Out the door he came wandering and wandering.
Down the lowly corners and streets set light,
For he could not understand where we was try as he might.
Pulling and puzzling at his own thoughts jumbled,
Came the swift of his feet towards the soft thunder's rumble.
"What great spirit has led me to this? Upon my neighbor's door,
What such a dream, 'tis this and nothing more."
Without reason or thought upon his mind,
What strange power has caused this ill time?
Upon the chime of the midnight hour,
Stood this man at the door of the neighbor's tower.
Why he was there, that we may never know,
But surely the neighbor heard the commotion below.
A rapping came onto the neighbor's door,
"This is only a dream," the man thought to himself,
"'Tis a dream and nothing more."
He felt the pull of his hand as he tapped his neighbors door,
The force of an entity he never felt before.
Why he was there, we may never know,
But the neighbor did hear the commotion below.
As silent as the grave, the man stood waiting.
Patiently and quietly without hesitating.
Till at once his neighbor shook open the door,
And looked out at the man he had never seen before.
They each stared blankly at one another,
Until the man could no longer stutter.
"No reason here for my being at your door,
Just curious as to the man who lived here before."
The neighbor stared blankly at the man he'd never seen,
Pondering if he himself should scream.
"No sir, you must be mistaken tonight,
I am the only resident here for the years spite."
The man stood coldly, very shaken with hate,
And felt his hands squeeze against the neighbor's weight.
The neighbor's neck at once had snapped,
And he fell to the floor with one fall rapt.
Walking silent as the cold winter despair,
the man came back into his evening chair.
Why he came to the neighbor's house,
We may never know,
But he sat pondering and pondering to and fro.
A rapping came onto the man's door,
"This is only a dream," the man thought to himself,
"'Tis a dream and nothing more."
Nov 2012 · 645
Please don't go
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2012
It kills me to know you will be leaving me soon.
I know you asked me if it bothers me and it  doesn't,
I thought.
I just keep having these thoughts about you forgetting me.
I want you to be mine and not leave me.  
But what am I supposed to do.
I just keep falling more in love with you.
Nov 2012 · 542
Woe to She
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2012
Woe to the girl who was left alone,
with her eyes that barely were shown.
She stood alone and pondered often,
remembering the words used to soften.

Who ever loved her?

If she deserved it or not,
we'll never know.
Nov 2012 · 639
you're not alone.
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2012
Sometimes a person can feel alone,
even in a sea of people.
There is so much noise in the room and
you are just sitting there.
Alone.
So many thoughts are going through your head.
He is talking
She is talking
He is yelling
She is yelling
The sound of silence.
Everything can get quiet really fast,
time shifts.
Then it's over.
Nov 2012 · 1.1k
Anxious
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2012
I am drowning in all of this.
It's hard to sit here and pretend I am okay.
I am not okay.
You won't understand me if I say I am scared.
You'll try to hold me and tell me it'll be okay,
But that's what scares me.
I don't know how relationships work.
At all.
I am not good at it.
I am better off alone.
It is hard to explain why.
Why I am the way I am.
If you asked,
I couldn't tell you either.
Nov 2012 · 440
Untitled
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2012
Sometimes I just feel small.
Nothing literal or anything.
I just feel like it sometimes.
And I forget.
Nov 2012 · 535
sudden changes
Kaitlin Frost Nov 2012
You know when you feel that something?
Something that makes you feel human. You know?
It's a spark of light in that perfect moment that just makes you
Stop. And
Swoosh.
With the wind blowing in my hair I feel somehow different.
Is this how this feels?
I don't even know how this stuff works,
But I'll do it.
All of this suddenly makes me feel,
Infinite.
Kaitlin Frost Oct 2012
Bonfire smoke rises into the skies
and a fire crackles with the dry leaves.
Pumpkin spices roam the chilling winds,
trying to find those shirts with long sleeves.
Friday night football games crack off into the night,
kids laughing off in the woods.
Drinking every drop of that hot chocolate,
and pulling up those hoods.
Cuddling up close with that someone,
having those listless conversations.
Then walking along those paths of lights,
while you sing "I'll Be Home For Christmas".
Oct 2012 · 898
Ours
Kaitlin Frost Oct 2012
Sometimes I wonder if it's worth it,
to be with someone.
I mean, who really wants to go through all of that?
Emotions
Heartbreak
Emptiness
Nothing.
What if it is hard to be with me because I want to be alone sometimes,
or that I can be hard to handle or trust?
Why do you do that with someone?
But then I figure it's worth it,
because why does everybody want it so bad?
Oct 2012 · 496
Just there
Kaitlin Frost Oct 2012
I fell in love when I saw you standing there.
I'm serious.
It was just like
Wow.
Speechless.
Oct 2012 · 793
the best day
Kaitlin Frost Oct 2012
You're somethin you know that?
Everything about you just makes me
Breathe.

Breathe girl, don't be nervous.
Linking arm and arm down those halls.
I just have to stop and watch
You.
You are everything and anything about me.
And that old GT car.
Laughing and singing.
I don't sing.
Not in front of just anybody.
You brought it out in me.
Love is a big word.
Oct 2012 · 1.8k
Alone in a coffee shop
Kaitlin Frost Oct 2012
First sight matters okay?
It determines everything.
Not judging.
Just saying.
But I saw you standing there just waiting.
Waiting for what?
For some over priced coffee over the counter or something bigger?
We sent each other funny faces,
Of course.
Remember?
I want this to last.
Kaitlin Frost Oct 2012
Just another pretty face
Just another girl with big *****
Just another girl with the great curves
Just another girl,
Who could resist?
Just.
Another.
Girl.
I am more than this.
A pretty face doesn’t get you far in life.
Or so you think.
My face hides more than you would imagine.
Aching pain, horrors not meant to be seen.
In my head there is so much going back and forth.
I am so nervous I feel like I am going to be sick.
Emotions pile miles high inside of me.
Sometimes I feel like I could explode with anger.
Or cry myself to sleep.
Or maybe just fake everything with that stupid grin on my face.
What did she do?
She said that about you?
You won’t believe what she did.
Can you even believe her?
Lies lies lies lies lies lies.
Looking out into the crowd,
and everyone’s beady eyes looking back.
He’s not there, stop looking.
Oh yeah and him?
Forget it,
Because he already forgot you.
You’re nothing to them.
Just some piece of meat they can take
Swings at.
Life is so hard isn’t it.
You poor poor thing.
So go ahead,
Pretend to be something that you sure as hell
Aren’t.
Wow I am so sorry about that girl.
Yeah don’t even worry about it,
You’ll find someone.
Knowledge is painful, but
Beauty is a burden.
Open your mouth,
And tell somebody.

— The End —